Simon: There's a lesson to be learned here, ladies and gents: if you love someone... if you love someone, just let them know, because you don't know when they might get kidnapped by an undead, demon-man, whatever he is, and taken away to his deep underground castle.
Old_Peculier: "The signal tower doesn't need to be that bright."
Simon relishing in his pyromania and burning down a pirate ship as Lewis watches from shore.
Sometimes, when the two try to cheat at a puzzle, Lewis will mess up and give Simon a wooden door instead of TNT.
"OLD WOMAN I DEMAND YOUR FINEST BACON!"
Pirate_Tinman playing a record in his butt cheeks.
The "Read note" signpost appearing in the main Shadow of Israphel series, even when there aren't any notes.
While searching for a map piece in Grimmjaw_Slugface's treasure vault with Pirate_Tinman, they have to cross a small bridge armed with an arrow trap. Simon, purely for laughs, set the trap off as Tinman was crossing. On the other side, he wordlessly walks up to Simon and punches him in the face.
"The mightiest of wizards in all of Minecraftia... Is he on the loo?"
That same meeting: Skylord_Lysander had given both heroes "temporary Skylord licenses" so they could access the wizard's tower. In less than three minutes, they both offer theirs to Fumblemore so he can wipe his ass with them.
All of 26 was a big stream of C Mo Fs, but this moment in particular:
Lewis: You know what's gonna have to happen Simon... You're gonna— Simon: I'm gonna have to murder him with this axe?
In part 27 of Shadow of Israphel, Simon attempts to fly a plane in the lower decks of a boat. He destroys the plane and immediately ends up phasing through the wall AND the ceiling onto the next floor up.
Skylord_Lysander: I'll... be on the deck... don't break the laws of physics any more than you already have.
In the ending of part 27 and the beginning of part 28 of Shadow of Israphel, Lysander's grandfather ends up blowing up when Israphel's curse kills him. Simon's and Lewis's reaction is hilarious!
Simon: Ohhhhh... I'm going to be sick!
In episode 29 of Shadow of Israphel, the trio meets Um_Bongo again, and they free him from a hanging cage. He offers to go back with them across the series of Floating Platforms, claiming that he is "good jump". He immediately falls short of the first gap and plummets into the ocean.
"I good jump! AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!"
Shortly before, Simon fell into the ocean as well. There's just something about that loud scream, combined with him climbing out of Nubescu's pot.
In the Israphel special for Granny_Bacon's funeral, the corpse jumps up as a zombie right in the middle of the service, and attacks the mourners. After being stabbed to death again, the service continues as normal.
Father_Braeburn: Ashes to ashes, dust to du- IN NOTCH'S NAME!
At the end of Shadow of Israphel Episode 31: Heroes! Take-a me with you!
Shadow of Israphel episode 32: Diggy Diggy Hole is banned in Stoneholm. Lewis reacts by throwing the record in the jukebox into the lava.
Knight_Peculier: "I like that song".
Even funnier if you had watched their 1.9 Prerelease Part 6 video about the new music discs beforehand, and Lewis sheepishly remarks that he regrets throwing away the record after hearing how good the new music was. (The video was released before Shadow of Israphel episode 32 despite being recorded later)
During episode 33 of Shadow of Israphel, Lewis, Simon, and Knight_Peculier first come across loads of Silverfish, then encounter a giant zombie dwarf, and finally go on a giant minecart ride outside while getting shot at.
Knight_Peculier: "I'm too old for this!"
The capper: at the end of the ride the server crashes and both Lewis and Simon get stuck in their minecarts.
Simon: I'm stuck! Oh, the humanity!
In episode 11 of Survival Island, Old_Peculier mentions that the airship needs more wind to move. What follows is perhaps the best fart joke ever. The epic music playing only adds to it.
Simon: Fortunately I have been eating nothing but Jaffa Cakes for the last week! *brrrrrrrap*
Skylord_Lysander: I would appreciate it if you did not do that on my fair Celaeno.
The lowercase "help!" sign in the Survival Island map.
In Episode 37, their repeated attempts to fly hot air balloons and climb a tower while placing ladders as they go.
Episode 38. Finding a dead body surrounded by blood? Scary. Picking up the "zombie arms" and legs and proceeding to hit each other with them and laugh at the noises? Funny.
Also, the epic return of Grizwald.
Our heroes' attempts to steal Skylord_Jasper's record from his house in Episodes 6 and 7.
Episode 39's Evil Honeydew clones. One is dispatched by Jaffa Cakes.
Simon, as Yoda: Always two there are! An Evil Honeydew and Another Evil Honeydew!
Earlier on, the duo must solve a puzzle involving redstone torches in order to unlock an iron door blocking their way. After several failed attempts, Simon gets tired of it and blows the door up. Old habits die hard.
In Episode 40, Prof_Webley tells the heroes they have to quickly escape. They respond by slowly pushing the minecart at about 1 mile per hour.
Episode 41, when the duo build a shelter but have no beds:
Simon: D'you think digging above is really the way to go, given that there's lava up there? Lewis: Look—look, we're trapped underneath some fucking pyramid, we failed to get the diamond, it's been burnt by lava, you're wedged in the ground—this is a disaster. This is an absolute disaster! If anyone finds us when they're playing this custom map, like our entombed mummies, please just kill us.
And in the conclusion, Simon reading the "thanks for playing" message in-character as the Professor.
Thanks for playing! If you have any comments or feedback, I'd love to hear it! Please send it to me, email@example.com. No, no, firstname.lastname@example.org. That's email@example.com/lol.appletjavaapplet?=4972.387.php
In their Professor Grizwald map, Simon reads a note from said professor. The possibility of him being dead is brought up. Simon, in his Grizwald voice, improvises possibly the funniest (fake) letter in existance:
In the last part of Professor Grizwald and the Redstone Torches, Simon yelling "JUST CALM THE FUCK DOWN" at Lewis who, in his panic, managed to botch Simon's attempts to get out of a room rapidly filling with lava, twice in less than five seconds, by shoving him out of the way and then placing a random wool block in his way.
Simon: There's usually a sweet sprot-sweet spot you can dance-*falls off the edge and dies*
Simon: Oh fuck.
The "Pharaoh's Curse" adventure map has a creeper bumping unexpectedly into Simon and Lewis and exploding. Words cannot do what followed justice, save that their reaction was priceless;
Lewis: oh shi- oh good Grief uh oh-
In their golfing game, on hole 3 of the snowy zone, Lewis seriously messed up his first shot. Cue him immediately looking around to see if anybody noticed and then proceeding to halfheartedly try to cheat.
During the Return custom map, Simon and Lewis have several problems with minecarts, including Simon's getting stolen by a Zombie Pigman.
Also during the custom map is that Simon is reading notes, and Lewis turns away for a second. When he looks back, Simon is on fire, and reacting rather calmly about it.
Simon's impersonation of the Wizard Burgmund whale Horcrux as it dies. It makes sense in context, maybe.
Simon misunderstanding Lewis when he said that Toggle, the map creator "topped himself".
Then, while trying to blow up a pod with TNT, the duo is ordered to place the TNT block on a wool block, then exit the pod and place a lever at a specific point and flip it. Levers can be placed on the floor or on the wall, so this confused the two of them a bit when Simon placed the lever on the floor and flipped it. When nothing happened, Simon broke the lever and put it on the wall, trying again.
Lewis keeps forgetting during the Yog-olympics that he's red, not blue. This may double as Fridge Brilliance; he's so used to being the Blue Oni.
The ending of the Yog-olympics. BOOM! Followed by them trying to attack Dave.
Another from the Yoglympics, which requires some frame-by-frame pausing: After the Kayaking event, Simon finishes second, and his kayak lands square on the torch pedestal that burns when you finish first. As he gets out of it, he accidentally lands on Lewis's lit torch pedestal and sets himself on fire. In the background of such event, there's a small sign that reads "The staff is not responsible for any burning Honeydews."
Even better, later once they've done the Sumo wrestling, there's a note in the Losers hallway saying 'that probably means you, Simon...'.
In the Calmere Nightmare map, Simon reads a note really fast in Prof_Grizwold's voice.
Simon: *After reading a somewhat silly note and getting attacked by a spider* JESSSSSUS CHRIOST SPIDER!
The notes in general in part 2 are hilarious when delivered by Simon deliberately hamming up his already hammy Grizwald voice as much as possible. It's even Lamp Shaded:
Simon [As Grizwold]: ANCIENT DIETIEEES... ALTERNATE DIIIMENSIONS... [cracks and laughs] WIIIIIIIIIITCHCRAFT! [...] AT FIIIRST I THOUGHT THE APEEEARANCE OF THE LOCALS... [Simon looses it and drops the voice] That's way to over the top...
And later this gem:
Simon [As Grizwold]: ...MAKES ME THINK, WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS ADD A SECOND... JESUS CHRIST! SOMETHING JUST... [Simon starts laughing] dropped through the roof?!
When told to paraphrase a note, he reads it incredibly fast. This, coupled with the Grizwald voice, makes it all but incomprehensible.
The GLaFOSH voice in It's Better Together. "I'm trying to talk like GLaDOS..." "Well you're epically failing."
Thanks to using various technic packs installed, the Yogscast has a bit of a...problem identifying the differences between materials, leading to a lot of hilarious situations where they think they found diamonds...only to find out that it is nikolite instead.
Simon: "We're being trolled....by nikolite."
"Oooh, diamon-oh wait no, it's nikolite. Trololololololo hahahaha!"
In Fumblepony is Missing, Fumblepony creates an oil drill near Appleloosa. In less than five minutes, Simon manages to flood the town with oil.
Even better is what Simon said. "I am literally worse then BP!"
Simon's response to being given beer by Fumblepony. *throws mug* "ANOTHER!"
Simon realizes something during Deep Space Turtle Chase.
In the first video for the RP map "The Curse of Sunny Springs", the Yogs start the video off explaining that it is raining in-game, as this was after the update that added weather effects. Simon begins reading the postcard from a character in the story, explaining the dire situation driving the plot. Said dire situation? A drought, because "it hasn't rained in months."
During their playthrough of the "Gloria" adventure map. Simon is distracted mid-sentence by the cookies Lewis is launching from a dispenser and runs up to collect them & toss them up into the air.
Lewis: And you're about to go mend the nuclear reactor?
Simon: -cheerfully- Yep! Come along, Lewis. Let's go piss around with some nuclear stuff.
In Part 1 of "The Swarm", just as Lewis & Simon are about to go through the Nether portal, some guy named "rep169" joins their server, then quickly leaves when he realizes what's going on. He then joins again to say "oops", & leaves again.
Chronotide has been mostly scary so far, but the part in Episode 3 where they're on stage and the audience, made up of snow golems, starts helping them fight off the monsters is pretty funny.
Also, singing "I Believe in a Thing Called Love" whenever the Darkness is mentioned.
Part four of Herobrine's Mansion, a custom map full of challenging boss battles.
Quest Log: WARNING! This boss fight requires coordination and skills.
Simon and Lewis: (simultaneously) Oh shit.
Everything about the "The Infected". To put it simply, take everything that made "The Swarm" ridiculous (the writing, the Narm, etc.), and turn it up to eleven thousand. Not to mention that there is no punctuation in any of the notes, and that Every Single Word Is Capitalized Like This.
The exact wording was "Oh Shit They Are At My Door Ok They Broke In Bye" Bonus points because Simon had been using the same voice for this person as he did for Sugar Plumps in Little Inferno. Sugar Plumps is a little girl.
"He Is Petraying Everyone Oh That Sick Son Of A Bitch"
Substitute Santa, played during their Christmas livestream: Simon and Lewis have to deliver a present...to Simon.
And then, at one point, Simon falls into lava and dies, losing the present. They don't realize this at first, but a while later...
Simon: Wouldn't it be scary if [the house they have to deliver the present to] was, like, my hou - like a layout of my flat?
Lewis: Oh my god, that would be...
Simon: And I'd be like, "wait, what? How...how do you know..." And then when I got home this evening there was a present waiting for me - OH SHIT! What happened to the present?!
On their run of Pyramid Adventure, Lewis is doing a jumping puzzle to pull four levers in the corners of the room's ceiling. What's Simon doing during this? After a few attempts and failures at trying to help with the jumping puzzle, he just throws out his boat into the water below and rows it around.
Simon: This is what I think of jumping puzzles.
In the Herobrine's Return playthrough, Part 1 brings us Simon voiceacting Herobrine... with Professor Grizwald's voice. Eventually, Lewis takes over with a more fitting voice, but hearing Herobrine with Grizwald's Large Ham voice is priceless.
Also from Part 1, Lewis reading Herobrine's to-do list and them mocking the fact that the second boss is named Skeletor.
Toxic Hospital, in which: Lewis breaks the rules before they even start the map and proceeds to do so several more times, there are random Yogscast posters around the hospital, the texture on the lava is bugged out in one part making it look like hot pink goop, Simon climbs a tree for no reason, and at the end Simon skips the last bit of parkour entirely by drinking a fire-resistance potion he had been given earlier and just swimming through the lava lake they were supposed to be jumping over.
The offices have the names of several famous fictional doctors on them; the one they find the note in says Dr. Jones on the door. So when Simon reads the note in his usual Grizwald voice, you may end up picturing Indy talking like Grizwald!
After having to repeat the day several times in the playthrough of A Day in Tuscarora, Simon goes as far as to break a window in his house to jump out of in an attempt to cut down on time to get everything done in the right order.
The video ends with Simon screaming loudly in fear three times at something after escaping the house at the end of the map. It's a pig.
The duo burst into laughter when they realise the Herobrine they keep seeing is gravel.
The final 241 Puzzle Map video has the boss fight with GLaDOS bug out at the end and she puts up no resistance at all. Epic music plays anyway.
The Monster Mash map comes with a 33-page in-game book, presumably containing instructions and the like. Simon states the number of pages, and then instantly throws the book over the edge of the world.
Mod spotlights/Yog Labs
While playing the Planetoids mod, Simon hands Lewis a piece of leather for soup, and then goes off on a tangent:
Simon: I'm not very good at cooking, so I'm not sure what you would typically put in soup. I mean, my method of making soup is, you know, "Open tin, pour contents in bowl, put bowl in microwave." Not even cooking it in a pan! Just the microwave. Lewis: Directly from tin to bowl. Simon: I mean, I did once try to cut out the bowl... but obviously that didn't go too well, putting a tin in the microwave. Lewis: Streamlining it, yeah, I don't think that's really the best way to go... Simon: I didn't even bother to open it, either. Um. Lewis: Was that what caused the fire? Simon: The fire. Lewis: Yeah. Simon: Of London?
Equally funny is what led to that conversation, Simon attempting to hide the only porkchop from Lewis.
Also from Planetoids, Simon and Lewis having an argument over which cow is ill enough to put down.
Simon: I'm just going to get some coal, and... warm myself up by the furnace.
Simon's grand entrance into the bridge at the end. Involves explosion. Near the end of a tour of a built-to-scale replica of the USS Enterprise, Simon flees from two creepers — letting them into the bridge and wrecking it.
Simon tunneling into a part of the ship and letting water outside.
The zeppelin mod spotlight had a lot of hilarious moments due to the sheer buggyness of the mod. The highlights were leaving part of Jasper's airship behind, flying a bit of a tower roof of Verigan's Hold, and then making one of the support towers for The Wall, from the roof to its very deep foundation, float up and let it just fly around bumping into everything.
BUNNIES! The video has Simon, in single player, put two bunnies in his house (the Mo Creature mod has bunnies). He leaves to find and put in a third one only to discover upon his return that the rabbits have multiplied and dozens of rabbits end up in Simon's house. He describes the horde of bunnies as "an adorable plague".
The Weeping Angelspotlight. First when an army of Angels appear, despite a single Angel having a spawn rate of 5%, followed by one Angel managing to trap Simon in his house, culminating in Simon's solution to said Angel.
At one point the Angels formed a conga line.
Hell, just the conversation in the beginning!
Simon: Hello, Lewis! I've made a new Minecraft video!
Funnier still is the opening; within a minute of starting, Lewis is attacked by a mass of creeper heads formed into a snake, appropriately named ROFLconda. The trio's reaction is utterly priceless. And then before they get their breath back and carry on, they get attacked by Another one.
The Battlegear mod brings us Lewis getting some revenge on an adventure map they had trouble with before.
The Sokoban Mod starts out with Simon breaking glass over a portal, getting transported to the End, dying, and being cloned. When he respawns, the intro music starts back up—and while roleplaying as the clone, he goes and does it again, dying, respawning, and causing the music to replay a third time.
Simon dies one more time at the end of the episode for a completely different reason, but the music is replayed when he respawns yet again.
In "Raiders of the Lost Archives", Simon stumbles across a chest filled with pages of the Shadow of Israphel script! Which then explodes.
PvP maps (The Walls, Survival Games, Crown Conquest, etc.)
In Survival Games 1, Simon and Duncan end up teaming up. Simon runs off, expecting Duncan to follow him, and gets mad when he can't find him. Switch to Duncan's video, and it turns out he actually was following Simon the whole time.
After Lewis loses, he pretends to be a creepy voice in Simon's head telling him to kill everyone.
After Sjin manages to kill off two players, almost everyone in their own videos speak of him as a rather dangerous foe. Meanwhile, in Sjin's own videos:
Sjin:[accidentally sets fire to himself] Oh no, I'm- I'm burning! Oh my God, no! Nohoho! Mintyminute: Burning, what? Sjin: I'm on fire, I'm on fire!
Even better, at one point, Sjin nearly ran into Simon and Duncan. Both sides stared at each other for a few moment, then ran away. Sjin was worried because he thought everyone was hunting him down. Everyone else was worried because he killed two people.
Sips and Sjin make a vulgar sign and spend a lot of their time hiding. They also assume what kills Duncan and Hannah is their TNT trap when in fact it was repurposed by Simon.
Duncan and Hannah, by far the most prepared, walk into a TNT trap, die, and get their gear looted.
Simon and Lewis repurpose Sips' TNT, laugh about the sign, and almost miss Sips and Sjin, nearly averting a final showdown. At the end, Simon pushes Lewis into lava, saying there can only be one.
At the end of Crown Conquest Round 1, Lewis makes it to the winner's platform, and then finds Gamechap also survived and got a crown. Lewis congratulates him, offers him a slice of cake, joins him in celebrating on the top platform, and then throws a voodoo doll causing Gamechap to hurtle off the platform and fall to his death. Lewis' laugh really sells it.
Gamechap: Oh cruel fate!
In Round 2, like in the previous round, Gamechap instructs Bernie to stay inside a house while he gets the crown, though right before the crowns despwn, Bernie in attacked by not one but two Creepers.
And the fact that Zoey did it by literally swimming up the lava rivers! reasoning that the crown's fireproofing could be exploited. The campers never even saw her.
And from all three rounds, everyone who, accidentally or otherwise, fell into the canals and had a hard time getting back out. Almost a Running Gag.
The entirety of the Super Pirate Battle Royale video. Ten solid minutes of Simon, Lewis, Duncan and Sjin just goofing off, and it is glorious.
During their Christmas livestream, the boys and several guests attempt to play a difficult PVP custom map, where they must race to collect wool blocks hidden within a dangerous obstacle course filled with traps. They proceed to divide themselves into teams... with legendary mapmakers Ridgedog and Hypixel on one team, versus Simon, Lewis, GameChap, and Bertie on the other. Absolute chaos ensues.
The funniest part of all is that the Yogs and the Chaps actually managed to win, because Ridge and Hypixel wasted too much time trolling with a TNT cannon.
Ridge's trolling goes above and beyond in the second part. He traps Panda in an iron box, drops Panda and Nilsey into the void, and, when the duo teams up on Sjin, Ridge hits the spaceman with an unending stream of regen potions.
Hanna accidentally killing herself with her victory celebration.
For some inexplicable reason, during the Terminator mini-game, Duncan (who is playing the titular murderous robot) starts laughing like Santa Claus while hunting the others.
Duncanator: HO HO HOOOO! *murders someone* HO HO HOOO!
This leads to a gem from Turps (who is not a stand-in):
The video opens with Duncan trying to break the spawn room floor, and is told not to by Lewis, saying he'll "get in trouble." This is followed by Sips punching Duncan, prompting Rythian to say "Don't punch holes in the Duncan, Sips, you'll get in trouble."
Turps says that the Terminator (about Duncan's laugh) doesn't sound like Jabba the Hutt. Sips follows with "He doesn't sound like a pre-pubescent teenager either. (high-pitched) "Hasta la vista, baby.""
When Duncan steps on the pressure plate to become the Duncanator, Turps chimes in with "He keeps sending me messages asking for my clothes, my boots and my motorcycle!"
Turps tries to distract Duncan with oily beef.
Hannah dies by mocking Duncan from a table. Which has steps Duncan can easily walk up.
Hannah's ghost flips the final switch, causing the game to say the survivors won when everyone is dead.
Followed up by Skyblock Wars 2, where the only reason things go better is because the bottom of the map is one big ocean of lava, and players can get more lava when they screw up.
In Race For the Wool: Tunnel Vision, the two teams spend more time sniping each other than actually looking for the wool. Even when the keep inventory command gets turned on so they don't lose anything when they die anyway, they still keep doing it.
When Team Yogscast is ascending to the moon, they decide to make it more dramatic by singing the Jurassic Park theme music (at 14:15 - sorry, it's not letting me link to that time for some reason). Then the other team tries to blow up their moon with TNT. Team Yogscast still ends up winning, as the wool pedestals were intact.
The hat films coverage shows that Simon actually fell from the moon before triggering the bomb, and none of the others were up there to do it instead. Exactly why caused the spectacular explosion is a mystery
*Honeydew blew up* [...] Lewis: Where did you blow up? What were you doing at the time? Simon: I was just minding my own business, and then a creeper came up behind me, and blew up like this-[another creeper explodes behind Simon] OW, GODAAMIT!
"Here's a line. All the land on this side is Sipsco, and everything over there is... Not-Co."
Episode 6: Simon snoops around in Sjin's factory. So far, Sjin's fenced off the area and built a wooden shed with an iron door. Simon makes fun of the iron door, then spends the next minute or so trying to remember how to make a lever.
And when they finally break into the shed, what do they find? An alarm system. Which then goes off.
The battle continues in Episode 8, when they use Applied Phlebotinum to make an infinite supply of dirt and cover Sjin's shed with it.
There's also the contract Honeydew signed for Sips Co. To sum it up, the Yogscast has to advertize Sips Co.'s dirt and dirt-related products, to which they are allowed a very meager discount on. In addition, Simon only gets paid a low monthly wage. And the only month he can receive it is August.
Simon: We're getting 12 pounds every episode. Duncan: Pretty good. Simon: But for a maximum of once a month. Duncan:Oh. Simon: And not on months that end in a "y". Lewis: It's not a great sponsorship deal. Simon: Or end in an "r". Or have an "r" in them. Lewis: It was quite an ironclad contract you signed. Simon: Or an "e".
Episode 9: Simon's inept notice board; also "lightystone".
The Sips Co./ Honeydew Inc. rivalry continues, as Sjin tries to confront them about covering his shed in dirt in the previous episode and they pretend that they're not home. To which Sjin replies that he can see their names through the walls.Then after that Sjin gets attacked by a skeleton.
And as revenge for this attempt at litigation, they decide to build the Nether Portal that they were going to use to get Glowstone directly under Sjin's shed so that the noise the portal emits (Wub wub wub) will drive Sjin crazy. Which won't actually work, since in Sips and Sjin's videos he reveals the shed is just a distraction to keep them away from the real factory.
Episode 10: More fun with corporate warefare! Upon returning from the Nether, they discover that Sjin has decided to turn all the fenced in land surrounding his shed into a dirt quarry for Sips Co. As they check out the new operation, they find out that Sjin is actually still on site, and he promptly chases them off for trespassing. Since Simon had been standing on top of the lit archway at the entrance when Shin told them to shoo, he simply moves backwards until he is on the light by only one pixel, and is mostly hovering in midair. He lawyers Sjin about this:
Sjin: Get off my light! That's my light! Simon: I'm- Actually, I think you'll find that I am not on your property, I'm sort of hovering in the air on the edge of your property, so... (Sjin breaks the light Simon is standing on, causing Simon to fall off) Simon: ...Ow. Goddammit!
They then steal the light and surround the quarry with trees.
Episode 15. Lewis is busy explaining to Sips how he has managed to make sure that only pure dirt is being pumped up from the quarry now. Cue a rogue piece of stone coming up the pipe. Lewis tries to quickly end the conversation and then moves himself to block Sips view of the pipe.
Another moment follows shortly after with sips seeing a piece of stone in the pipe. Lewis quickly rectifies the situation, and then becomes astounded at the sight of totally random crap appearing in the tube, Including a mushroom, a bucket and even what looks like nether wart.
In Episode 16, Duncan and Simon spot Sips running around in the woods behind their factory and immediately wonder what sort of devious plan he's up to. Meanwhile, at the same time over where Lewis & Sips are...
Sips: I'm going to go frolick in the woods without my shoes or socks on.
Oh so many in Episode 17. Here are some highlights:
Lewis & Sips plan to steal materials from Simon and Duncan's work shed. While Sips is on stakeout, he notices some white powder being pumped into Simon's chests and immediately wonders if it's cocaine.
Sips: Is that what makes the Jaffas so delicious?
Sips turns out to be a different kind of crazy boss than Simon, but still crazy.
Sips: They call me the Problem Solver back at HQ. Always solvin' problems! (beat) Even though... there's nobody at the HQ, it's just me. It, it gets lonely. I'm the only guy there, so, I have to invent stories and talk to myself. Do you, uh, do you ever do that kind of stuff?
Lewis: Um, no, I'm usually... usually good. Okay, well basically Sips-
Sips: The last Christmas party was a disaster. It was just me. When I stood up to do the toast... it was only me clapping.
excruciatingly long, awkward pause
Sips: So, uh... how 'bout that dirt?
When Duncan heads back to the shed, he notices materials missing from their chests and suspects that Lewis has been stealing from them, so they decide to set up an alarm system. Then Duncan & Simon realize neither of them know how to make an alarm. So they steal Sips's. And don't get caught.
Made even funnier when we see that they set up the alarm system in front of the door. Lewis was breaking in through the trapdoor.
Later on when Lewis gets fired from Sips Co. and goes back to work for Simon, both of them deny stealing from each other.
Near the end of the episode, Duncan notices Sips holing a sapphire sword, which Lewis is missing. After they confront Sips about it, he accuses them of stealing the alarm. When Simon denies stealing it, Sips angrily starts beating everyone with dirt.
A few minutes later, all issues have been resolved, Lewis gets his sword back, and Simon asks if Sips will teach him how to dirt box. Sips happily agrees, and uses Sjin as a punching bag. Everyone else pulls out dirt and start beating the living snot out of Sjin, before he gets knocked into the quarry. Duncan then knocks everyone else into the quarry, jumps into it himself, then everyone has a free-for-all.
Episode 23: Lewis finds a pig on a small island next to an oil deposit. Lewis thoughtlessly kills the pig, & Sjin asks him if it was an endangered species. Lewis said the pig did have a derpy look to it that other pig's didn't have, and they both mourn killing off the last of the Lesser Spotted Derpy Pig.
When Lewis and Sjin show Simon their Oil Island, they start working on building an underground tunnel beneath the ocean to pipe the fuel back to Honeydew Inc. Simon is given a Destruction Catalyst to dig the tunnel, and in the span of a few minutes, manages to screw up three times:
First, without knowing what the catalyst does, he right-clicks and destroys half of the oil and water tanks, including the oil and water inside.
Second, when he starts digging the tunnel, he uses the catalyst too high up and the tunnel fills with water.
Third, when told to dig deeper so he could go beneath the water, he uses the catalyst rather than a pickaxe to go deeper, creating a giant hole.
Lewis: You are ruining my life.
And then, he screws up a fourth time a while later. He's finished tunneling to Honeydew Inc, and Lewis tells him to use the catalyst straight up. He does so...while he's beneath where Sjin is standing. This causes Sjin to fall to his death with no warning whatsoever.
There's even an action replay from Lewis's and Sjin's perspectives directly after.
Episode 29: Lewis renovates the factory and goes on an underground tour with Simon and Sjin. After finding the tunnel that Sjin used to escape from the bottom of the oil well on Oil Island, they all decide to go there in a fit of nostalgia... Only to find that all their combustion engines exploded and the island is now a massive crater.
Lewis: Well this sort of explains why the fuel stopped flowing...
Sjin goes into one of the condensers and briefly tries making a load of rotten flesh- with at least five stacks of glass inside.
In part 38, Simon goes insane in his attempts to return pigs to Pig Island. The funniest moment is when he leaps over Sips' desk, demanding dirt.
At one point, it's revealed that the mining robots have a dance function. It is just as hilarious as it sounds.
Preparing to get down...
Press any key to stop the groove
Simon finds a mining turtle in part 40 while shearing sheep. The following typing ensues as he tries to run it.
Simon: hello how are you i am well
Turtle: No such program
Simon: run gw2.exe
Turtle: No such program
Turtle: No such program
A few episodes back, Duncan made a flying ring for himself. Lewis tries to make one for himself too, so he condenses a whole bunch of chickens to harvest feathers from them. Of course, since they're all baby chickens first, he has to wait a while before he can kill them, so now they have a whole crapload of baby chickens running around in their factory.
A few episodes later, the chickens are still in the factory, and some have somehow made it to the third floor of their factory. Who knew chickens could fly so high?
Probably in the same episode, Lewis later happens upon a whole nest of chickens trapped in a bat box. Lewis and Duncan dub it their "nest".
Chickens turn up everywhere for a long while afterward.
Episode 45 had Sips feeding bullshit so ridiculous, you can't believe that Simon is believing it. For one, they claim that they came in on a hovercraft, a hovercraft that transformed into Optimus Prime.
Episode 52 is Duncan vs Head. Lewis and Duncan find the giant Sjin head under the bed and crack up. Then they start mucking about with it, laughing all the way. Sips comes in later, and he can't stop himself from laughing either.
When the combustion engines blow up the Honeydew Inc. basement floor, Lewis remarks how the result is a "lame jumping puzzle". Duncan then chimes in how it's even more lame for him, since he can fly. It's funnier seen than explained.
Simon taking control of the giant Sjin head to get revenge on Sips.
In episode 57, Duncan, Honeydew Inc.'s resident Smart Guy, doesn't know how to read a clock in Minecraft.
In Episode 58, A tangent from Sips winds up causing Simon revealing an Accidental Innuendo that Lewis cut earlier; "Come into my pig." This causes everyone present to burst into hilarious laughter.
Sjin and Simon building a hot tub in the factory's penthouse leads to several moments of hilarity. First they need to build down into the floor below, which Lewis complains is where the computer systems are supposed to go. This gives Simon the idea of using the computer servers to heat the tub. When they actually get to filling the tub with water and lava, they fill it from beneath. Finally, Simon starts laying down a series of ridiculously strict rules, ultimately leading to nobody being allowed in the hot tub.
Episode 68: While makings plans for what to do this episode, the group splits into the standard Lewis/Sjin and Duncan/Simon. However, this leaves Sips out, after which Lewis suggests they fight over him. They do, except they're fighting to not have Sips join their group, and go with the other group instead.
The ending of episode 76. The guys spend about two minutes laughing themselves silly.
It gets to the point where Lewis sounds like he's crying because he's laughing so hard.
Earlier in the same episode, Sjin asks Sips where he left the saw, but, being English, his pronunciation of the word "saw" sounds a lot like "sore." And suddenly everyone's making jokes about Sips having some sort of STD. Gets a callback later on when Duncan suggests that "topical magma cream" might cure the sore.
Episode 92 has a noticeable delay between cake production and jaffa production, causing Simon to briefly panic. He's also trolled with lightning. And then there's the prison they build for a hapless cow...
Episode 104: It starts raining in the jungle Sjin and Duncan are in, so they sing..."Under the Sea".
In episode 108 Lewis has Sjin helping him build a Gene pool. once finished, he demonstrates it's ability to liquify bees, and Sjin starts to become somewhat distressed. in episode 109 Lewis manages to convince him it's neccessary due to their bee overload, and he is somewhat reassured. Lewis then wonders whether or not you could hear the bees scream if you listen carefully, causing Sjin to immediately go back to disagreeing with the whole thing.
And then Lewis proceeded to call himself Bee Hitler.
The Blackrock Chronicle
Zoey gets Rythian drunk stating she has no ulterior motive for doing so. That is all.
Less than five minutes later Zoeya scares the living daylights out of Rythian by talking about "their baby". Which she named after the sword. Baby Jim of course turns out to be the Volcano they found in a much earlier episode. The moment she mentions it, a battle theme starts.
Zoeya: It's okay I left him alone in the woods.
Zoeya: I'm at the slide. I never got to properly test out the slide. I'm now going down the slide. I am approximately halfway down the slide. I'm now at the end of the slide... That was amazing, that was the best thing I have ever done.
Rythian stumbles upon a pool filled with squids in the basement of the Crooked Caber. When Ravs reveals that the squids' ink is his beer's secret ingredient, Rythian briefly has an I Ate What? moment, but he quickly loses interest, stating that he doesn't care, because it still tastes good.
The chicken invasion of Rav's bar.
Gets a Call Back in episode four of Rising - soon after Rythian, Zoey and Tee arrive at the Crooked Caber, Rythian asks if Ravs still makes the "squid ju- uh, not squid juice", staring at Zoey (who is walking outside), because she has no idea what Rav's ingredients are.
Also from #4 - Ravs gives Tee sugar cubes. Not long later, Zoey asks loudly who gave him sugar, and they all turn to see Tee spinning around wildly, throwing his head backwards and forwards. It needs to be seen for the full effect.
Also, she tried using solar power and Wi-Fi to power the TARDIS-teleport thing. Then Tee powers it by playing one-dino Lever Game with a lever connected to it that makes the door rapidly open and close. Zoey proclaims that it's kinetically powered and that she never thought the Lever Game would have a practical use.
Rythian walks in shortly after and comments that "it looked bigger on the outside." Guess what the episode is called.
And when they use the machine to return to their base the episode ends on them all vanishing, happy having found Fishton. Episode 6 literally opens with Rythian standing in the Obsidian strewn ruins of Sick Bay's basketball court wondering what happened. When he finally finds Zoey again she has already upgraded her cyborg limb into a plasma-throwing power gauntlet that is apparently powered by chocolate milk, after a long misadventure with the exploding machine. Rythian is utterly confused and loses it
Episode 6 starts with Sips deciding they need a roof. he turns away to drop off his stuff in the chest, demands to know what Sjin's done to help, and then turns back to find Sjin standing quite casually under an "instant roof" that he'd made in the instant Sips wasn't looking. Sip's sudden surprised turn from dismissive to impressed really sells it.
Voltz (YogscastLalna and BlueXephos channels)
Duncan accidentally types "cent" in the chat. Sips replies "fidy?", even though at that point the two groups had never met and Sips and Sjin were probably supposed to be keeping it a "secret" that they were there.
Lewis and Duncan need leather. Their options; Scour the world for a cow and build a farm, cheat and load a stack in, or raid Sips and Sjin's headquarters. Duncan chooses the latter. And once they're done raiding they leave a Shadow of Israphel style exploding back door.
Episode nine ends with them firing up the nuclear reactor, cheering as the power starts to flow, and the ending theme tune plays triumphantly as it fades to black... Boom. cut to the extended ending, with them trying to salvage their destroyed nuclear reactor, and arguing over who's fault the explosion was.
When Simon shows up in Episode 10, he ends up becoming the Only Sane Man in comparison to Lewis and Duncan's trigger-happy Mad Scientist ways. He also is given the job of cow/sheep farmer despite the fact that he technically knows the most about nuclear physics out of all of them irl.
Duncan makes himself a full set of powered armor and walks in on Lewis. Nothing happens for about a second, and then Lewis literally jumps back a pace in game, as though in shock.
Duncan: Well I've already set this off! How do you stop it?
Lewis: I, st- (cut off by howling whistling noise)
Lewis: Duncan! What are you s-
Sips_ hit the ground too hard
several seconds of shocked cackling
Most of the base was actually spared, Sips just happened to be standing on the bit that wasn't. Ironically, the area most damaged by the fiasco was the Shipping & Receiving station, where they used "Sipsco deliveries" as an excuse to cheat. In short, the bomb destroyed their supply of spawned items.
The best part is that even after all this, the vortex was never truly destroyed, but only got kicked into an unloaded chunk. It's still out there, waiting for someone to uncover it, so it can resume devouring the world. Sips and Sjin have already planned on heading that way to find a place to build their new secret base, because Who Would Be Stupid Enough to follow a world-eating wormhole?
Not quite as funny, but in the first nine episodes, Lewis and Duncan had an iron golem that had apparently been left by their bunker's previous Russian owners, who they dubbed Comrade. Early on, they accidentally trapped him in the basement level, where he was utterly useless from then on, and quickly forgotten. In episode 14, while Duncan returns to the bunker to sort out the nether portal, Comrade suddenly emerges from behind it and curb-stomps a few spiders that got too close. Neither Lewis nor Duncan had a clue how he got out of the bunker.
And then it's revealed on Sips and Sjin's voltz that It was them and Ridge that opened it up to spread to troll them.
In Part 19, Lewis tells Simon and Duncan to get back into the bunker, and to not lead any Creepers into the bunker while they were at it. Immediately Simon spots a Creeper, and silently and intentionally lures the Creeper into the bunker with him. Hilarity ensues.
The test firing of the thermobarric missile in episode 20 completely destroys the hill where the peace treaty was kept. Apparently they were all expecting just to set the area on fire but not harm it, and we subsequently get his gem;
Later they're discussing what other missiles they could use and what to shoot at, and Simon and Lewis bring up the various things banned by the peace treaty. Duncan then points out that it doesn't exactly apply because the treaty and all proof that it was signed had just been blown up...
After the first missile, Ridge launches an Ender Missile with transports Duncan to The End... where he promptly dies in the void, losing his super advanced power suit again.
Ridgedog's Boss Banter between episodes 23 and 24 is pretty funny. Especially after he gets defeated by Simon. We don't see exactly what happened to him, but his Big "NO!" is followed shortly afterwards by "Where in the hell am I?". Then, after the nuke hits there's an unexplained message about a self destruct sequence. Ridge's reaction;
Ridgedog: Oh dear.
Epsiode 25 starts off with a cut, presumably so Ridge can stop his self destruct from going off prematurely. Ridge had to step away for a bit, and Lewis decided to start recording before he got back. By the time Ridge gets back on, his entire base is just one giant hole in the ground.
As Ridge's self-destruct sequence activates, Simon panics and runs through a side door. Which leads to the chamber where the active explosives are sitting.
Simon: I'm guessing this isn't the safest place to be.
Duncan and Simon stumble upon a small set of prison cells, with levers that spawn animals. Simon keeps spamming the wolf lever, causing Duncan to have to break the cell open so they don't all get crushed. Simon keeps spamming it, so Duncan fires his bazooka at them. One survives. Although it's poisoned.
Simon: One survived?
Duncan: Well, it just died.
Episode 1: Simon is startled by a spider and screams so loud he sets off a car alarm outside.
All through episode 2 Lewis and Simon are poking fun at Duncan, who due to equal parts misunderstanding and poor directions has gotten lost.
Made even funnier when you realise that Lewis is getting a little annoyed at Duncan not following "simple directions" he's given him, while not even knowing where he is when he gives them.
Duncan complains of being hungry, then immediately walks in the opposite direction from Simon as he tries to give him baked potatoes.
The reason he was walking away? He spotted some carrots ready to be pulled from the ground in the village, and only acknowledges Simon once he gets to them.
This exchange between Lewis and Duncan about the directions.
Lewis: How did he get lost again? Duncan, did you never get your map-reading badge in the scouts?
Duncan: I did, and I learned that when I'm told to go west I go west, not south!
Simon putting chests all over their base.
In episode 9, Simon saying he's never seen so many zombies in his life. Not even a minute later, Duncan is frantically fighting of a horde of zombies and nearly dying.
Duncan: Why is there so many?! *turns around, sees four more zombies* OH MY GOD??!
In episode 36, awesome music plays as Duncan assembles the rocket. When Duncan realises holding the rocket in his hand means that his character holds it above his head, the music stops and he bursts out in hysterical laughter.
They livestream Moonquest on the 15th day of the 2013 Christmas streams. A string of increasingly epic fails ensues, from Lewis having connection problems to not knowing that the rocket ship doesn't run on coal to them repeatedly getting stuck in hostile worlds through the Mystcraft mod while searching for oil, all culminating in Simon failing to press space when prompted to slow down his rocket and crashing on the moon.
The adventures in Lovely Oil Land, a fire world.
Simon entering a rift to the regular world and not realizing it at first.
The mutant skeleton derailing everything until they manage to kill it.
Sludgepit 2 is a snowy fire word with meteor showers. Simon gets hit by one.
Duncan and Simon freaking out over the first meteor ponderously drifting past really sells it. Not to mention that they go from smiling at the snow to absolute panic, fleeing falling meteors and desperately trying to escape while on fire, all in the space of less than a minute
Other Minecraft things
In the PAX teleconference panel video, Simon builds a simple wooden house to show off how Minecraft works, then installs a fire by lighting some netherrack in the middle. Some things never change.
The increasingly Running Gag of Simon using multi-purpose TNT — blowing up doors he couldn't open, blowing up puzzles he couldn't solve, building it as scaffolding to get higher, using it as bridges... And almost every time, the TNT ends up backfiring. Take, for example, the 1.8 Prerelease video with the Stronghold: It seems like Simon has learned his lesson about building TNT bridges directly above lava, but suddenly a creeper comes out of the darkness and blows up the bridge with Simon and Lewis on it.