Funny / Big Fat Quiz of the Year

TV series (sort of)

2004 Edition
  • You'll be wondering why Jonathan Ross was never on Mock the Week after this one.
    (re. the "superbug" epidemic)
    Jimmy: Is the superbug referred to as (reads Simon Pegg's Long List) MI-5, MFI, MSI, MDRI...
    Simon: It's one of them.
    Jonathan: Does the MFI stand for "Motherf*cker's Incurable"?

2006 Edition
  • While asking for the proper name for the full face veil, Jimmy warned the contestants to "keep the casual racism to a minimum". Russell and Noel wrote "peep scarf".
    Jimmy: Now, Jonathan and Cat have gone for the only slightly less racist...
    Jonathan: ...The post box.
  • One question involves guessing who the mystery guest is, and Jonathan nails it in one - because the guy, Guy Goma, already appeared on Jon's show, for being mistakenly put on a live news show as an Apple executive when he'd originally walked in for a job interview. Ironically this was far more research than that new team put in...

2007 Edition
  • Russell and Noel answered a question with Hitler Diaries. To avoid people thinking that they were endorsing Hitler, they also drew a picture of Hitler condemning him. They condemned him by writing 'Bad, Bad Hitler'.

2008 Edition
  • While everyone else praises the children of Mitchell Brook Primary School, Sean Lock goes off on a rant berating their acting abilities. He then recounts a story of being hit in the face with a broom by a nun after being in a play himself as a child.
  • Sean Lock and James Corden answer a question (what was unusual about a pregnancy) with 'It was an abomination'. The correct answer is that it was male pregnancy. They manage to convince Jimmy to give them the point.
  • Setting the tone for seasons to come, Claudia Winkleman on newsreader Jon Snow:
    Claudia: That is porn for me. That's the dream. In a second, like that, out by the bins (pushing motions) *honk*honk*! (audience breaks down hard, Stunned Silence from Jimmy)
    Jimmy: I'm sorry, do the 'by the bins' thing again because my wank bank wasn't on... [...] Davina, Claudia, would you double team Jon Snow?
    Davina: Oh, yeah.
    Claudia: Of course.
  • Speaking of Davina McCall, the unfortunate gesture of hers that Dara O'Brien started milking (we're not sorry) into a Running Gag:

2009 Edition
  • Rob Brydon's "small man in a box" voice, especially when he's ranting about being treated as a trained monkey who is prodded to do the voice, and mid-rant, Claudia Winkleman (his partner) pokes him in the arm and he immediately starts speaking in the voice.
  • After Jimmy makes a joke, Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand feign outrage and walk off the set. Jimmy's response?
    "Get back here, I've got photos of both of you!"
  • Rob Brydon mocking Jimmy's laugh - with Claudia Winkleman busting out a horse noise out of nowhere.
    Russell Brand: I'm disappointed that when Claudia said - "I'm gonna do an horse" - I perked up!
    • And capped off by David Mitchell's rant.
      David: We cannot get into a position where none of us being able to laugh! It's victimizing the audience, and taking the piss out of them as we all sit here in stony silence. (Cue Carr's staccato laughter) It's an expression of joy!
  • Jonathan Ross pressuring David Mitchell and Charlie Brooker to dance to "Poker Face".
    • And failing utterly.
    • David's reaction to the pressure:
      David: I'm hired to sit here and be sarcastic, not dance around like some cunt.
      Jimmy: That some cunt's name is Jonathan, leave him alone.
  • The second Mitchell Brook Primary School play was about the VMAs and Kanye West interrupting Taylor Swift's acceptance speech. Russell happened to have actually been there, and he said that when Kanye did that, he thought, "Yes! YOU take the fucking death threats this year!"
    • And then there was his laughter of delight at seeing the child playing him.
    • And Rob bitching that they shouldn't ask questions if one of the panelists was actually there.

2010 Edition
  • "Oh, fuck sake! I'm having a stroke! That's so embarrassing!"
  • Richard Ayoade, when asked by Jimmy Carr how he was doing, provided a short story about how, while he was fine, he was having issues with the hot water unit at home, which was bothering him a little. Jimmy begins to make light of the non sequitur, causing Richard to deadpan:
    Richard: I'm sorry, I just made the mistake of genuinely responding to your question.
    • And he manages to stay completely deadpan while saying that the problem might be that he replaced his water tank with a bean bag.
  • When Jimmy asks Jonathan Ross what he's doing, Ross jokes about taking over Carr's shows on Channel Four and Carr gets the funniest faux-Oh, Crap! look on his face.
  • When Noel mentions that he hasn't read any Harry Potter books, Jonathan replies that Noel appears in the books as Severus Snape.
    Noel: Was I good?
    Jonathan: You are very good in them.
  • "Why do you think it's weirder throwing a live wasp than a nightmare?"
  • The Say-What-You-See resulting in Jimmy and Michael McIntyre arguing over the pronunciation of the word "Apple".

2011 Edition

80s Edition - 2012
  • When the "Say What You See" puzzle inexplicably ends with a man's buttnote , the guys start discussing what happens to men's bits as they age, leading to this golden line as Jason Manford consults his smartphone:

90s Edition - 2012
  • The entire Mr. Blobby segment must be seen to be believed.
    Jimmy: Right, it's the final question of The Big Fat Quiz of the '90s, and to ask it, we're honored to have one of the decade's most iconic stars. Please welcome - apologies, Jack - Mr. Blobby!
    • The sheer terror on Jack Whitehall's face the entire time is both amazing and hilarious, considering he had earlier in the show stated his fear of Mr Blobby, who dove for Jack when he first came onstage.
    Jack Whitehall: How the fuck were you allowed near kids?
    Jimmy: Jack, Denise, tell me what you answered?
    Jack: (Stammering in fright) Titanic, Bridget Jones' Diary, and Oasis, and please can he leave.
  • Dara Ó Briain acting out a girl from Babe Station receiving odd requests as if someone has called and demanded she do exercises from a basic acting class.
  • Claudia Winkleman's impression of Damien Hirst.
  • When Jimmy asked why Domino's saw record sales on 17 July 1994, Jack answered with, "The invention of stuffed crust".
  • Jack and Denise's river dancing. "I can't tell whether that's wee or sweat".
  • One for the Mock the Week fans as Dara pretty much ports his shtick of breaking into an impression to illustrate the topical persons' point of view into this show. Until they get to his Nelson Mandela voice...

00s Edition - 2012
  • The team name of "Big Gay Al & His Big Scottish Pal".
  • Jimmy's laugh is mocked again, this time by Noel Fielding.
  • This joke at the start of the Music section of the quiz:
  • At one point, the camera switches over to Noel, who is suddenly wearing an eyepatch.
    Jimmy: Have you got an eyepatch on?
    Noel: No.
    • Later on Noel switches his eyepatch from one eye to the other whilst aggressively interrogating Jimmy about whether an answer was in fact correct.
  • Kevin Bridges and Alan Carr's answer to "How did this man cause bad breath, nausea and constipation?".
  • Alan Carr's reasoning for answering "Nangashing" to a question about Nasty Nick's Catch-Phrase in Big Brother
    Alan: I couldn't even think. It's about 10 years ago, love.
    [Richard and Noel start cracking up]
    Jimmy: It is about 10 years ago. That's pretty much the nature [Richard and Noel laugh harder] of the Big Fat Quiz of the Noughties, I really should have pointed this out.
    • On top of this, Richard and Noel's answer of "Help me kill again".
    Noel: What, he's called 'Nasty Nick' because he cheated on Big Brother?
    Richard: Even Goebbels isn't called 'Nasty Goebbels'!
  • Sarah Millican scores a rare knee-slapper, and Kevin Bridges may secretly be Captain Obvious:
    Jimmy: In 2005 what did Lord Alan Sugar say would be "dead, finished, kaput, gone within a year"?
    Sarah: Was it the thesaurus?
    Kevin: The year 2005 calendar.
  • Richard and Noel's answer to "Who managed to set a new world record after spending 71 days crying in the B&Q?".
    Richard: [completely deadpan] Was it your mum? No, seriously, was it your mum?

2012 Edition
  • Jack Whitehall and James Corden randomly order pizza during the middle of the show and they come prepare with a bottle of wine and wine glasses.
  • #susanalbumparty. The guests spend ages riffing of that. Jack and James put down instead #subolovesitinthearse and Richard Ayoade put down #bemoreracist.
    • Richard's comment about the real answer: "What bums aren't anal? There's a redundancy within the hashtag."
  • Jack and James' answer for 'What does Obama do on a Saturday morning?' They're so embarrassed by it when it's about to be revealed, Jack crouches down in front of the screen to block it. Then when Russell sees what they put he helps Jack hide it. The answer, by the way: put on a condom and have a posh wank.

90s Edition - 2013
  • The photos of the guests from the 90s, especially Lee Mack and Jimmy's photos.
  • Jonathan Ross saying "Ferrero Rocher".
  • The look on Richard Ayoade's face when Jimmy revealed the losers will be Covered in Gunge (with the very same gunge machine used in Noel's House Party).
    Richard: I will kill you in your sleep.

2013 Edition
  • As a Call-Back to the pizza from the previous year, Jonathan Ross brought a turkey to the studio and made sandwiches. He also re-gifts his unwanted Christmas gifts, which happen to be Jimmy Carr DVDs. Noel opens a DVD case, fills it with turkey and gives it to a member of the audience, calling it a perfect gift.
  • Kristen Schaal has to explain "cake farts" to all the other contestants.
  • Jack and Dara describing Deal or No Deal to Kristen Schaal:
    Jack: Basically, this guy opens all these boxes, and in one of them is a severed head...
    Dara: And then you just gotta deal with it or not deal with it.
  • Dara putting on Noel's massive black fur coat. Someone points out that they end up looking like two people who've just had a really awkward one night stand at Glastonbury.
  • A question about Kanye West somehow leads to Jonathan Ross and Kristen Schaal trying to re-enact Bound 2. With Dara as the bike.
  • The panel discusses the Unfortunate Implications of the 2013 hit single, "Blurred Lines".
    Noel: What's this song called, "No means yes"?
    Jimmy: Might as well be, Noel. Basically the conte- the idea is "Wha- what was that, 'no'? Eh, whatever.
    Richard: It's really ambiguous when someone says "I don't want you to have sex with me." What do they mean?
    Then, after watching a segment of the clip
    Jack: What a prick.
  • The entire panel takes it in turns to roast hard-man character actor Danny Dyer on his rather tight pair of jeans, all while he attempts to read out a really "poxy fucking question".
    Danny Dyer: [for the third or fourth time] I'm the new landlord of the Queen Vic!
    Richard: We know! Bonnie Langford wants her top back!
    Danny Dyer: Alright, listen, [reading from the card] Wetherspoons are opening up a new pub in a questionable location, can you remember where? I couldn't give one fuck at this point!

2014 Edition
  • Jimmy asks for the title of the tune Dolly Parton played on the saxophone at Glastonbury earlier in the year, and suggested it was probably "a saxophone song".note  The ever pedantic-and-proud-of-it David Mitchell takes issue with his use of the term "song" to describe something played by a saxophone.
    David: Saxophones can't sing.
    Jimmy: Oh yes they can!
    David: No no no, they can't. "Singing" is- is the verb for the- the human musical noises that have words in them.
    Jimmy: (spends a few seconds taking this in) Well, okay, I'd like to formally apologise.
    David: If you can find a saxophone song, then you must have found a talking saxophone. In which case, fucking hell, let's give up on this, there's a talking saxophone in the world!
  • The cast of The Inbetweeners ask the teams to identify a singer whose first name is "Cuban slang for 'clunge'".note  Melanie Brown (AKA Mel B. of The Spice Girls) is confused by the term "clunge", leading to a digression on Unusual Euphemisms for the female and male reproductive organs, ending with Mel asking Kevin Bridges if he has a clunge, and Kevin replying that he has a "clunge plunger".
    Sarah Millican: Get out me clunge!
  • Jon Snow dancing to "All About That Bass".
  • Mel B briefly interrupts by asking "Can I ask an audience member?" Cue Jimmy going into a silent but hilarious Freak Out! while her back's turned.
  • Just about the entire cast making fun of Mel B. in Spice Girls lyrics.

Anniversary Quiz - 2015
  • Russell and Noel throughout the entire evening. How many questions did it take them before the quiz went Off the Rails? One.
    • During the first answers, Russell asks the audience for help, while Noel brings a random audience member on stage to replace him. Hilarity Ensues.
  • "I do not look like a ventriloquist doll!"
  • After Chico of The X Factor fame asks the group a question, Jack Whitehall mentions that he texted Chico several years ago, but got no response. He tries again during the quiz, and Chico texts back. Cue Jack exploding with happiness. Doubles as a CMOA.
  • A Dalek (a friggin' Dalek!) asked the final question. And then it exterminated Jimmy.
    Jack Whitehall: Is this a male Dalek or a female Dalek?
    Jimmy Carr: It's... it's hard to tell, I don't know where to look.
    Jack: 'Scuse me, are you a male Dalek or a female Dalek?
    Dalek: There is no such thing as gender in the Dalek world.
    Jack: Right. Good. Okay.
    Russell Brand: Don't matter that much in the human world!
    Jack: You should work more outside of Doctor Who. Have you had any offers?
    Dalek: Many.
    Jimmy: Yeah, he's on 8 Out of 10 Cats next week, it's gonna be huge.
    Dalek: I will exterminate ALL THE CATS!
  • When Russell said he shook Ed Balls' hand "all clicky wrist", Jimmy says he sounds like something out of A Clockwork Orange. So Russell breaks out into a bit of the old Nadsat. Funny enough. Then there's Jack's response.
    Jack: It sounds wonderful, but I'm gonna have to have that Google translated into posh.
  • Noel's button man mask. Whether it's him or Russell wearing it.
  • "So drunk, I tried to fuck voicemail."
  • Something between this and Nightmare Fuel when Jimmy introduces a segment by recounting that "the fox hunting ban went into force in 2004", which triggers a horrific and heart-stopping Skyward Scream from Jack. Right after that though...
    Jimmy: I find it hard to sympathise, they're just small-minded inbred creatures that don't know what they're doing, and worst of all, they love hunting foxes.
    (Jack throws something at Jimmy)

2015 Edition
  • All the other panelists (particularly Rob) arguing with Jimmy over why Richard and Greg should have gotten a point for answering 'peer pressure' (question being 'why did David Cameron stick his junk inside a dead pig's mouth').
    • And then the other two teams deliberately answered a question wrong in the next round so they could get the point.
  • And Jon Snow dances again, this time to Hotline Bling by Drake.
  • Rob trying to take over hosting duties.
  • "Yeah, it was, but you don't get any points, cause fuck you, dude!"
    • "I haven't been able to concentrate since you did the 'fuck you, dude' thing. It genuinely turned me on, Jimmy."
  • Bad Dong.
  • Charles Dance's reading of the sex scene from List of the Lost.
  • Nadiya, the series 6 The Great British Bakeoff winner, telling the contestants that she didn't actually make the snacks she brought with her, so if they don't like it, she doesn't care.
  • There's a new category for online news (read: Memetic Mutation), and the final question with a mystery guest has said guest bringing that dress into the studio. Yes, THAT dress. Cue the black-blue-white-gold argument infecting all the players.

Quiz of Everything 2016
  • Tit up.
  • The freakin' dinosaur coming on and just mucking shit up.
  • The Foodfight! which really took the show Off the Rails.
    • Richard's response to it is just as good.
    Richard: You're animals!
  • Richard mocking Jonathan's clothes. Note that Richard's sitting next to Noel.
  • The Running Gag of Richard and Noel being husband and wife, as well as Mel being Jack's mother, and Richard and Noel babysitting Jack:
    Richard: We're giving Mel a night off.
    Mel: I love it when the Ayoades come round...
    Noel: I'm gonna make Jack lick me in the ass.
  • Jon Snow's best dance yet, this time to Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody"
  • A question about the iconic "Tubthumping" by Chumbawamba led to Mel briefly giving her rendition of the bridge, and sounding uncannily like Julie Andrews.

2016 Edition
  • Things almost get confusing when Mel Giedroyc's in the show and one question is about that other Mel, Mel B (who's also been on the show), and the photo just shows Mel appearing on Bear Grylls' show, except both of them are standing really close and hunched over and retching for some reason. Jimmy's only clue is "it's not sexual, but y'know, for some people out there". Mel Giedroyc's reaction to this is something to behold.note 
  • Roughly an hour in, Mel reveals that she has brought a small picnic to share with her teammate Romesh, including some brandy in a water bottle, and two blankets. She cheerfully shares with David Mitchell when he asks, as well.

Quiz of Everything 2017
  • The photoshop question does album covers this time, and a pic of Adele's 23 with Jimmy's face on it is mistaken by Noel as "an advert for impotence". And one of Simon & Garfunkel, with Art shown very close and directly behind Paul, has Katherine Ryan and Aisling Bea calling it "Bummed 2 Death".
    Jimmy: The only thing better than that answer is how pleased you are with it.

Quiz of Everything Episode 1
  • Jonathan and Bob's team name: One and a Half Condoms
  • The question where they have to fill in the blanked nouns of a famous quote from Queen Elizabeth I is chock full of these instead of the correct words.
    Kristen: I may have the body of a weak ginger woman, but I have the heart and inbreeding of a king.
    Bob: ...but I have the feet and penis of a king.
  • Joey Essex's...interesting description of Sigmund Freud.
  • After Mel nearly gave away her answer one too many times:
    Jimmy: Where did you learn to whisper, in a helicopter?
    Kristen: (extended cackle) That's really good... (beat) I've been in a helicopter so I got it right away.
  • Mel constantly gushing over Jon Snow.
  • The contestants convincing Fred Siriex to give out a Nebuchadnezzarnote  of champagne to audience members.
    • On that note, just how difficult and innuendo-laden Jonathan and Fred tried to take the cork off.
    • And Bob stole the Methuselahnote  bottle.
    • During answer time, most of the players stumble over the pronunciation of Nebuchadnezzar. Even more amusingly, Mel and Kristen come up with Bethesda, and Jon thinks the biggest one is Kardashian. note 
  • The answer to life, the universe, and everything is champagne and doughuts.
  • "And then I was twerking in David Mitchell's face."
  • The fact that Claudia, who hosts a series centered around dancing, got the dancing question wrong.

Quiz of Everything Episode 2
  • Richard Ayoade's rant. He proceed to insult everything and everyone.
    • "Ancient Fucks"
  • "You know I don't like fun."
  • Noel's angry because Jimmy inadvertently stole his joke.
    Jimmy: So the question is, what are Richard Ayoade's classmates doing there?
    Noel: I've just written that as a joke! Fuck you, Jimmy!
  • "Jimmy, you were at that [Halloween] party. You went as a cyborg. No costume needed...year before, you went as a puppet. No costume needed. Year before, [Roger] Federer. No costume needed."
  • Jon Show. Love Shack. 'Nuff said.
    Noel: Jon Snow's got enough in the bank that he can do that and he's still cooler than the ancient fucks.
  • Noel's always got some hilariously random answer up his sleeve, but this one is one for the ages:
    Jimmy: I asked what can you do aged five that you can not do in the House of Commons unless you're the Chancellor delivering a budget. Noel, Richard, what've you got?
    Noel: We put 'burp in a pencil case'.
    Jimmy: You think the Chancellor, when delivering a budget, is allowed to burp in a pencil case?
    Noel: Yeah, and then zip it up and leave it for later on.

Quiz of Everything Episode 3
  • Romesh banged Dara's mom.
  • The dig at the Brexit vote.
  • "How is Noel the serious one?"
  • Dara is offended that the camera cut to him after Jimmy made a crack about the Catholic church pedophilia coverup.
  • When showing a picture of a puppet head:
    Noel: Jimmy! That's a passport photo!
    Jimmy: That is not my passport photo.
    • The really funny thing is the puppet head actually did kinda look like Jimmy.
  • "Shit-ney Speared."
  • The constant jokes about Eddie's horrible handwriting.
  • Upon finding out Jimmy would take Dara and Chelsea's answer "I Like Big Butts" as a substitute for "Baby Got Back"
  • Parental Anal Handy
  • Joey Essex said Winston Churchill reminded him of Oddjob

Quiz of the Year 2017
  • Big Narstie mixing up whether David Mitchell was on Peep Show or The IT Crowd. And, later, mistaking Noel Fielding for Nigel Planer.
    Noel: He's about 90!
  • When Jimmy asks for a photo of Kim Jong-Un, the production crew puts up a photo of Michael McIntyre.
  • Noel's dressed up as the podium.
  • Jimmy arguing with Big Narstie over what the 'Mobot' (aka the Mo Farah sign) looked like. Twice. The second time ended with Jimmy giving the two finger salute. Also twice.
    Big Narstie: That's the Jimmy Carr sign!
  • "Someone in Bristol farting is not a massive story!"
  • One of the questions was about Greggs' Advent calendar replacing Jesus in the Nativity scene with a sausage roll.
    Roisin: He's a Jewish baby being played by a pork sausage.
    Jimmy: Being played by?!
    Roisin: I mean, open up the auditions, you can't just give it to a sausage roll.
    Jimmy: Open up the auditions? What do you think, a steak bake should have got it?
  • Jon Snow is back with a news report on what one of the players thinks is called "I killed a man". The correct answer? "Look What You Made Me Do".
  • An animatronic polar bear asked the final question. Big Narstie thought it was a real one for a hot second.
    • Also, the reason they used the Collins English dictionary to determine the word of the year, and not the Oxford English dictionary? Because the polar bear went to Cambridge.

Quiz of Everything 2018
  • In the glaring absence of Richard Ayoade and Noel Fielding, all the teams take it upon themselves to provide the bullshit answers in equal amounts. Even Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer, who are practically the Straight Man team by default.
  • For some reason Jonathan brings two real pugs onto the stage, one of which ends up dragging Miranda off stage.
  • "Alexander Graham Bell rang his assistant, Thomas Watson, and said 'Mr. Watson, come here. I want to see you.' So I think it was a booty call."
  • "That's not Christian Slater! That's Jimmy in a fucking pair of glasses!"
  • They ended up asking a question that Jonathan knew because he was the one that filmed it. note 
    Jimmy: We didn't think you'd remember.
  • Quentin Tarantino's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.