Blaine AndersonA member of the Dalton Academy Warblers, and the story's Deuteragonist. Though he shares his canon-self's gentlemanly nature and Adorkableness, the fandom's common complaint that he's a Relationship Sue has been Cerebus Retconned hard.
- Born in the Wrong Century: Played With. Blaine's knightly tendencies mean that he's self-sacrificing, honorable, and far too naive.
- Break the Cutie: So much. He's also retroactively broken due to Cerebus Retcon.
- Broken Ace: Played With. Blaine is obviously type two, but he's literally an ace who got broken. His chivalric tendencies are overcompensation for his regrets and low self-esteem.
- Broken Tears: At the end of The Red Bull. He's stressed out, concussed, and he's barely aware of what's going on.
- Deconstruction: And how. Blaine is Kurt's Knight in Shining Armor because 1) he's sheltered and naive enough to think that's how the world works, 2) his family is barely functioning, and 3) his first relationship ended horribly.
- The Champion: For Kurt. Blaine also has a host of champions in the Warblers and Greg, due to his sheltered nature.
- Cool Big Sis and Brother: Blaine's siblings Kyle and Lydia are respectively a photographer and an art student studying in California, and have a much better relationship with Blaine than their parents do. Then again, it doesn't do much good since they're not home very often.
- Courtly Love: A depressing take on Kurt and Blaine's But Not Too Gay portrayal. Kurt's not too enthusiastic on the matter of sex, but Blaine takes it really far. And he has a reason.
- Dude Magnet: Blaine is a toned-down example with "only" two guys on his record plus one he doesn't know about, but he makes it up in sadness and terror.
Trent: How many unrequited loves can Blaine possibly have wandering around town?Thad: Are we counting guys and girls?
- Blaine's attractiveness is lampshaded in Robin Hood when Morgan asks if the Warblers know anyone Reid might look like. (Blaine mistook him for his first and refused to talk to him.)
- Also lampshaded when Morgan jokes that Dr. Simon Tam's falling in love with him, and Simon mentions that everyone else on staff is.
- The Dulcinea Effect: Gay version, from Blaine to Kurt. Blaine himself has inspired the related Big Brother Instinct in a lot of the Warblers.
- Exact Words: "I've never been anyone's boyfriend." The story behind it is just as depressing as it sounds.
- Extreme Doormat: Played for Drama—due to emotional issues and loneliness, he's very obliging. The Warblers call Blaine Kurt's bitch, and Sarah notes that Blaine's unusually passive.
- Gender Inverted Example: Naive, sweet, and idealistic in spite of his shitty life? Blaine sounds like The Ingenue or a Princess Classic.
- Good Is Dumb: The Warblers constantly joke about how stupid Blaine is.
- Heroic Self-Deprecation: He has no self-esteem and constantly calls himself "slow" or "stupid."
- Honor Before Reason: With how honorable he is, Blaine verges on Too Dumb to Live (in the modern era, at least).
- Horrible Judge of Character: Played With in that while he is selectively oblivious, his real flaw comes from being insanely trusting.
- Incorruptible Pure Pureness: Played With. Blaine considers Kurt to be this, but Blaine himself is a much better example, given all the shit he's gone through.
- Lonely Rich Kid: Rich enough to live in a mansion with two home theaters (one for him and one for his sister). However, his father is outright neglectful, and his mother is extremely traditional. His siblings care a lot about him, but aren't physically there due to work/college. It's implied this is why he's so sheltered.
- Oblivious to Love: Taken to the logical (and Fridge Horror) conclusion: If Blaine takes months to realize that Kurt fell in love with him at first note, he wouldn't have any more of a clue that he has a stalker.
- Strong Family Resemblance: He looks like a shorter, black-haired version of Luke.
- Too Dumb to Live: Lampshaded heavily by the Warblers. However, it's played for drama/tragedy since Blaine's not technically stupid—he's just emotionally damaged and idealistic enough to make poor choices.
- True Companions: With all of the Warblers in general, but especially with Wes and David.
- Wide-Eyed Idealist: He's ridiculously trusting and naive. The Warblers frequently compare him to a puppy.
- Younger Than They Look: Played for Drama in a subtle manner. Blaine's physical maturity is why older guys tend to pursue him.
Kurt HummelA temporary member of the Warblers, and currently back at McKinley High. Mostly the same as his canon-persona, though with a few additional twists.
- Berserk Button: He may be a slender, youthful choir-member, but it's very ill-advised to kidnap his boyfriend. Don't try to strangle Kurt either, because he'll go ballistic and start pummeling you.
- Cry into Chest: With Blaine in The Midnight Carnival. Then Blaine cries into Kurt's chest in the The Clock.
- Deadpan Snarker: Yep.
- Driven to Suicide: In "The Unicorn", he says that if things get much worse, he may well kill himself as a result.
- Hates Being Touched: Mentioned a few times; even Blaine is careful not to touch him too much.
- Official Couple: With Blaine.
- Second Love: Blaine's second love.
- Talking to the Dead: He talks to his mother in the cemetery sometimes.
- True Companions: With the Warblers and the New Directions.
Gregory "Greg" MorganThe Anderson's house manager and fifty-three years old. Loyal, laid-back, and rather paternal towards Blaine. And he's also a spy.
- Nice Guy
- Beware the Nice Ones: When questioning Alex, he loses his temper very quickly and is revealed to carry an ice-pick in his sleeve.
- Old Retainer: Shades of this.
- Parental Substitute: He immediately starts looking for Blaine after he, Wes, and David get kidnapped and Blaine's call home devolves into incoherent crying.
- Sarah suggests that Blaine should tell Greg what happened with his almost-boyfriend. Blaine's reaction (paraphrased, it was 'Oh God no, he'd kill me') implies that Greg has basically become the closest thing he's got to an actual father.
- Reasonable Authority Figure
- "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Gives one to Luke when he finds out that Blaine got kidnapped and Luke's first reaction isn't to freak out or ask what's happened, it's to berate Greg for not telling him earlier.
- Undercover Cop Reveal: In The Cat.
The Dalton Academy Warblers
Dalton's choir group. There are twenty-two of them besides Blaine and Kurt. The named Warblers in canon are Jeff, Nick, Thad, Trent, Wes, and David. These guys are the main source of comic-relief and heartwarming moments in an otherwise soul-crushing story.
Tropes regarding the Warblers in general:
- The Bet: Many of them. They also have sub-bets.
- Character Development: Inevitable, since they were minor characters in canon. Nick is a foul-mouthed stoner, Wes and David are Blaine's overprotective best friends, they take everything very seriously, and they're all as close-knit as the New Directions.
- The Champion: To Kurt and especially Blaine.
- Chekhov's Armory: Stocked full.
- Chekhov's Gag: The Warbler's buddy-system on finding out about Blaine's stalker is a little over-reactive, but justified. If Wes and David hadn't been with Blaine on the last day of school, he'd have gotten kidnapped by Alex without anyone to help.
- Chekhov's Gun: All the tracking devices that they use for Shipper on Deck gags? Very handy when David's cuff-links record Wes, David, and Blaine's kidnapping.
- Chekhov's Skill: David writes everything down. Leading him to realize that the same guy's been following Blaine around for a while.
- Crazy-Prepared: Hoo boy. They're Genre Savvy as hell, their list of Zany Schemes to keep Kurt and Blaine together went from A to M (and later moved on to numbers), they have a first-aid kit, and they secretly record their friends to keep track of bets. They also have a lot of secret/emergency Warbler meetings in response to events.
- Hero Secret Service: A downplayed variant for Blaine, with a very good reason.
- Lampshade Hanging: So. Damn. Much.Jeff: Blaine is Kurt's bitch.Brandon: Has Blaine gotten permanent brain-damage from his daily gallon of hair-gel?Nick: How the fuck does Blaine get into these things?
Thad: We forgot about David's cuff-links.
- And in Nikos:
- Obligatory Swearing / Precision F-Strike / Sophisticated as Hell: They may be a group of private-school students, but that doesn't mean they can't swear up a storm. Nick especially is Sir Swears-a-Lot.
- The Power of Friendship / True Companions: They'll rip your kneecaps out if you show any sign of hurting Blaine or Kurt, and they drag their members to therapy on an annual basis. They'll also tell a staff member as soon as they find out one of their members is getting stalked, and then help with the police search once they realize three members got kidnapped.
- Rule-Abiding Rebel: A very literal version—their exploits constantly flout legality for Rule of Funny, yet they never think of doing actual crimes. Lampshaded by the BAU:Prentiss: Kids who can hotwire cars and tamper with security cameras don’t usually serenade people with pop songs.Rossi: It’s probably better that the Warblers tape their friends to keep track of bets instead of doing something illegal.Morgan: Like taping their friends.Rossi: Something illegal with malicious intent.
- Serious Business: Part of the reason they're so Crazy-Prepared is because they take everything seriously, ranging from bets, rehearsals, emotional breakdowns, and stalking.
- Shipper on Deck: For Kurt and Blaine, as well as two of their past members. They're also betting on Jeff and Nick.
- Those Two Guys: Jeff and Nick. Wes and David are also this when they're not with Blaine.
- Wrong Genre Savvy: They constantly call Blaine and Kurt a Lifetime/Hallmark couple or a fairy-tale couple. Hunting the Unicorn is... not quite a fairy-tale.
- Vitriolic Best Buds: They constantly mock Blaine for being stupid, chivalrous, and using too much hair-gel, but they do genuinely care about him and are very protective. They also tease Nick for being a stoner.
Wes KahaleA Filipino-Hawaiian member of the Warblers, with a girlfriend called Lacey. Part of the Warbler's council, and one of Blaine's best friends.
- The Bet: Has an uncanny ability to win any bet he makes. Nick calls it his "magical Asian gambling", and the other Warblers joke about how he sells parts of his soul to the Devil every time he makes a bet.
- Deadpan Snarker: Matching up with Kurt.
- Hidden Depths: He writes urban fantasy stories about old-school unicorns.
- I Call It "Vera": His gavel is Marcus. He's also trained the Warblers to respond immediately to the sound of a gavel.
- Mundane Utility: He has considerable skill with cameras, but the most he does is record Kurt and Blaine so the Warblers can validate their many, many bets, plus embarrass them on Facebook and blackmail them for homework help. Speaking of bets, he uses his ability to win them to solve Warbler drama.
- The Nicknamer: Sometimes calls Blaine "little hapa" out of fellow-feeling (he and Blaine both have Filipino mothers who are very traditional).
- The Stoic: Shows exceptionally after he's locked in Alex's basement with Blaine and David. Blaine is falling apart due to his concussion and David is understandably livid, but Wes just grabs his phone and tells Greg as much as he can.
- Not So Stoic: In Maid Marian, he starts crying when talking to his dad.
- Those Two Guys: Whenever he's not a Power Trio with David and Blaine, he's mostly with David.
David WillisBlaine's other best friend, the second Warbler council-member, and the Hot-Blooded counterpart to Wes' stoicness.
- Chekhov's Gun: He bugged his own cuff-links to keep tabs on Kurt and Blaine's relationship. They end up recording him, Wes, and Blaine getting kidnapped by Alex.
- Chekhov's Skill: He has notebooks full of records. And his most recent one helps him realize Blaine is getting stalked.
- Hot-Blooded: He gets very opinionated, and he also gets in a fight with Alex before Alex kidnaps him, Blaine, and Wes.
- I Have This Friend...: Who has a stalker.
- The Nicknamer: On his phone, Kurt's number is listed as "Horrible Spy" and Blaine's is "I Fucked Up Again, Please Help". He gives everyone he considers to be a friend such nicknames in his contact list.
- Wrong Genre Savvy: Frequently uses what he's learned in psychology class to examine Kurt and Blaine, though he's also a teenager and makes a few wrong conclusions.
Nick GraysonThe Stoner of the choir, though he's notably more Hot-Blooded than most examples. Best friends with Jeff.
- Almost Famous Name: Nick Grayson. Lampshaded by himself when he gets high and mistakes Jeff for Batman, and by various people calling him Nightwing.
- Angrish: In "The Tunnel," Nick has an episode of this combined with Berserker Tears.
- Assurance Backfire: When the Warblers find out Nick's been sneaking into clubs using his own doctored ID.David: So who’s the redhead? She’s like, twenty-five!David: She's your what?!
- Berserk Button: He's furious when Jeff says he's acting weird, mainly because Jeff is apparently the only person who never called him weird before. He ends up crying shortly afterwards, which the Warblers find pretty alarming.
- Bi the Way: A hot-blooded, foul-mouthed stoner who happens to be bi.
- Coming-Out Story: In Robin Hood. He came out a year ago to his mother, only to have her think that going to a same-sex school is the reason he's "confused." He smokes a blunt in front of her while he packs up and leaves, then gets drunk with Trent and kicks out her headlights. His resulting trip means that he didn't remember to tell Jeff the full story for a year.
- Cloud Cuckoo Lander: He has strange logic, "three definitions of truth" according to Wes, and then there's this:Nick: I can pretend I didn't come out yet and tell you first.
- Dark and Troubled Past: When Morgan and Rossi question him, we find that his parents divorced when he was eight, and he moved in with his aunt after coming out as bi to his less-than-informed mother a year ago. He also tells Jeff that sometimes he smokes because Jeff overwhelms him.
- In Jack Jingly, it's revealed he has a restraining order against his father.
- Hot-Blooded: "We need to find that bastard and rip his fucking kneecaps out!"
- In Robin Hood, he tells Blaine that if Alex comes too close to him again, Nick would break his fingers one at a time with Wes' gavel.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: In Jack Jingly, he's really upset on hearing that he told Jeff "I love you." He then has an argument with Jeff and ends up crying in the bathroom, much to the Warblers' concern. Later on after finding out that Alex is at his father's place, he tells the police immediately and insists that he's okay, but later on he needs Jeff to stop the car so he can cry and scream in a park.
- Ship Tease: With Jeff.Nick: (to Jeff) Blaine needs a hug. [...] Kurt's not here, so you're the only one pretty enough to cancel out the estrogen swimming around in Blaine's system.
- In Robin Hood, he calls Jeff pretty again and said "I love you" to Jeff while stoned in a flashback.
- Sir Swears-a-Lot: So much. Trying to watch his language makes things worse.
- Truth Twister: He has "three definitions of truth" and just plain lies to people as well. Wes asks Nick ridiculously specific questions to make sure he's not high.
- What Did I Do Last Night?: In Robin Hood, Nick needs three people (Trent, Jeff, and Thad) to help piece his own Coming-Out Story together, since he got stoned and drunk.
Jeff WoodrowOne of the dancers, and friends with Nick.
- Ambiguously Gay / Ambiguously Bi: When JJ asks if Jeff's gay, the Warblers accidentally give her five answers.
- Big Brother Instinct: To Blaine, despite being younger than him.
- Cloud Cuckoolanders Minder: To Nick, mostly because he gets high. Jeff also reminds Nick about fairly obvious things like how "fucktarded" isn't a word, and that you can't redo coming out.
- Dragged by the Collar: After he finds out Nick's Coming-Out Story in an FBI questioning room a full year after it happened, he drags Nick all the way into the bathroom.
- Kid with the Leash: He frequently has to hold Nick back when he gets too incensed.
- Odd Couple / Straight Man and Wise Guy: He's a fairly normal person who's best friends with a Hot-Blooded pot-smoker.
- Pretty Boy: Played by the pretty and blond Riker Lynch, after all. Nick comments on it several times.
- Those Two Guys: With Nick.
The group of FBI agents who are called in by Simon Tam to investigate Blaine's abduction. They consist of Derek Morgan, David Rossi, Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner, Penelope Garcia, Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, and Emily Prentiss.
Sansa TyrellA young British woman who was formerly Nick's therapist, and currently acts as Blaine's therapist at Blue Sun.
- Awesome Mc Coolname: Nick thinks her maiden name "Sansa Stark" is awesome because it reminds him of Iron Man, plus it's alliterated. Her current name "Sansa Tyrell" is disappointingly normal.
- The Beard: Functions as this for her husband Loras. They're good friends and she's fine with him and Renly being together.
- Death Glare: Matches one up with Jareth when they run into each other at Nick's house.
- Incompatible Orientation: In "The Spider," Sansa hopes that Blaine has "a slightly older Doppelgänger" who's straight and didn't get crushed by the world. She's also a beard for her husband Loras.
- Model Couple: Her and Loras. Nick calls them "delicate flower people."
- Mysterious Past: She's a woman from two noble families and is working in America as a therapist for teens. She can't return to Britain for the time being, and the BAU recognizes her by her maiden name of Stark. She doesn't even wear a wedding ring to let people know that she's married.
- Jareth Erlking got her out of SOME sort of hostage situation, and Littlefinger is looking for her.
- Statuesque Stunner: Loras is a bit shorter than her.
Sarah WilliamsNick's cousin in college, who's engaged to a British man called Jareth Erlking.
AlexAppears in The Butterfly, thirteen chapters in. He's Blaine's Stalker with a Crush, and later kidnaps him in Nikos. As such, he's a Walking Spoiler. He gets sprung out of jail by Littlefinger.
- Abduction Is Love: Attempted. He kidnaps Blaine, but gets forced to kidnap Wes and David as well when they refuse to leave Blaine alone.
- Even Evil Has Standards: He isn't "evil" so much as "deluded with a bad temper," but Alex disapproves of Littlefinger's obsession with Sansa.
- Knight of Cerebus: There are hints of this starting from his mention in the thirteenth chapter, but come the nineteenth chapter, there's a huge downswing in the Warblers' exaggerated comedy.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero!: Congratulations! You kidnapped your crush, along with his two best friends, using his own car! You also accidentally concussed him, so he's not only terrified of you, he's not making a whit of sense! You have now committed at least three crimes in one day!
- Congratulations! You couldn't keep your mouth shut when your accomplice's kid happened to drop by, so now you've unintentionally ruined their chances at repairing their relationship AND you two have to move to your backup hiding place because said kid recognizes you and he told the police! Lampshaded when Tori wonders if he has self-preservation.
- Stalker with a Crush: The deluded kind.
- Understatement: He says that he "lost his temper" when trying to strangle Kurt.
- Unreliable Narrator: For someone whose introduction was so sugary, his actions and personality are a huge contrast.
- Walking Spoiler: Doesn't appear till the thirteenth chapter, and doesn't do anything major until the nineteenth.
- Wrong Genre Savvy: Seems to think he's the Dogged Nice Guy who'll end up with Blaine after he breaks up with his selfish boyfriend Kurt. He's actually a random guy obsessed enough to stalk a seventeen-year-old, and said teenager has no clue who he even is.
Tori GraysonNick's father, a lawyer at Blue Sun and a former government agent. He and Nick's mom got a divorce when Nick was eight and Nick has a restraining order on him. He's the elusive "Spyke" that Tom and Jerry are looking for, and he hides Alex after Littlefinger breaks him out of jail.
- Adult Fear: Nick was going to drop the restraining order on Tori, but then he saw Alex at Tori's house and immediately told the police. Tori's not that optimistic about his and Nick's relationship now.
- Nick got the restraining order on him because he was terrified of coming out as bi and Tori reacting badly. Tori just hugs him and says "I love you."
- Chekhov's Gunman: From the Tom and Jerry spy gag. He's Spyke, whom Tom and Jerry are looking for.
- Crazy-Prepared: When Nick finds out that Tori's hiding Alex after his jailbreak, he grabs a bag and moves them to "House B" since he knows Nick is going to tell the police. The bag has hair dye for disguises.
- He's even more prepared in "The Kingdom," where he's planned his movements down to a thirty-second escape. He cuts that in half to FIFTEEN seconds to tell Nick he loves him, even though that blows his cover.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Tori loves Nick pretty damn hard. When Nick drops by his house unexpectedly, Tori tries to get him away so he doesn't see Alex. Unfortunately, Alex can't keep his mouth shut. Littlefinger is using Nick's welfare as blackmail for him. Moreover, Tori risks getting arrested to talk to Nick in person and the only thing he wants to know is why Nick got a restraining order on him years ago.
- Exact Words: Nick doesn't talk to Tori, but they write notes on blue paper to each other.
- Mysterious Past: He was a government agent and had to divorce his wife because of the strain it put on their marriage, and is currently a hospital lawyer. His son has a restraining order on him. He's also a wanted criminal called "Spyke."
- Papa Wolf: Tori's dad instincts flare up when Littlefinger says he needs Alex to find Sansa.
- Tragic Villain: He's only one of the story's villains because Littlefinger's been using Nick's safety as blackmail to make Tori shelter a known criminal.
Petyr "Littlefinger" BaelishFrom Game of Thrones. Littlefinger is a British man looking for Sansa in America, and he needs Alex's help to find her. He busted Alex out of jail and took him to Tori Grayson's house for hiding.
- Blonde, Brunette, Redhead: Him, Alex, and Tori are a male and villainous example.
- It's All About Me: He's bothered by having to orchestrate a jailbreak, but it's because he's lost track of Sansa instead of any moral qualms.
- Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!: He pulled a whole lot of strings to break Alex out of jail before his trial.
- Shame If Something Happened: "You wouldn't want Nick to get caught in this, would you?"