"What?! No gun and no booze? Well then how in the hell are you supposed to play real-life SkiFree?!"
—The Cinema Snob reviews Crackerjack (aka Die Hard in a Ski Resort)
SkiFree is a Windows 3.1 game in which players control a skier down an endless Obstacle Ski Course until they get bored or are eaten by man-eating Abominable Snow Monsters that run at 10 m/s and do not know fear.
A 32-bit version is available on the programmer's website. See also The Other Wiki's article. The Internet Archive has the game available through an emulator. In 2020, Microsoft released a Spiritual Successor called Edge Surf or just Surf as an Easter Egg in their Microsoft Edge web browser.
Not to be confused with MacSki, another Obstacle Ski Course game made around the same time.
This game provides examples of:
- The Bad Guy Wins: Unless you decide to quit the game beforehand, you will eventually get caught and devoured by the Abominable Snow Monster.
- Bigfoot, Sasquatch, and Yeti: "Abominable Snow Monsters".
- Border Patrol: After you've travelled far enough in any direction, an extremely fast yeti will chase you down, swallow you whole, pick its teeth with your ski pole, and jump up and down in sadistic triumph. The player can keep ahead of it by entering Fast Mode with the F key, in which case the course loops around and yeti will hound you for the rest of your days.
- Bystander Syndrome: None of the other skiers do anything to stop the Abominable Snow Monster, and don't bat an eye even when he devours you.
- Endless Game: Only boredom and death await those who ski free.
- A parody video by Dorkly offers an alternate, happier ending for the skier.
- Game-Over Man: The abominable snow monster, especially as he jumps up and down victoriously over eating you.
- Guide Dang It!: Using the F key to go faster (and avoid the abominable snow monster).
- You can also pause the game and press T to advance frame-by-frame, which (combined with fast mode) makes it trivial to evade the monsters indefinitely... or at least until you get bored and stop.
- Happy Dance: As noted, the abominable snow monster does a villainous version of this upon catching and devouring you.
- Invincible Villain: No matter what you do, you cannot kill the abominable snow monster.
- Kick Them While They Are Down: The abominable monster can easily get at you if you're stunned from hitting a obstacle.
- Mighty Roar: Subverted. The creator says that Abominable Snow Monsters sound like a guy doing goofy noises.
- Obstacle Ski Course: The whole point of the game. There are jumps, rocks, trees, chairlift support towers, other skiers, dogs, etc...
- One-Book Author: This remains the only released game by Chris Pirih.
- Red Eyes, Take Warning: The abominable snow monster has tiny, yet menacing red eyes.
- Rule 34: Parodied on the official website, which contains an animated GIF of two Abominable Snow Monsters going at it. In glorious two-frame, pixelated form.
- Toilet Humor: Occasionally, skiing into a dog will cause it to relieve itself.
- Troll: The yeti's aforementioned jump up and down in sadistic triumph, which gives vibes of "HAHAHAHA! I JUST DEVOURED YOU! NGYAHAHAHA! YOU SUCK!" You cannot even kill him, either. He's seriously matching the Duck Hunt Dog for that.