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Tearjerker / My Deepest, Darkest Secret

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ALL SPOILERS ARE UNMARKED.


  • The very fact that the relationship between Solon and his brothers (except Noa and Jino, plus Jakah to an extent) is pretty strained (even more than in canon). Yes, he still loves them dearly, and the feeling is mutual, but ever since Sooha arrived, things between them all have gotten worse.
    • Solon is fully aware that they won't be happy when they find out he's half-werewolf, as he was already fearful when he discovered the truth about himself, and got even more scared when the realization fully hits him after his first transformation. And he actually felt sad that he didn't seem too guilty when he realized that he had to hide it from them. But he still felt guilty enough to have nightmares about it.
    • Solon felt really bad that he had to lie to Jino, the sweetest guy in the world (and one brother where his relationship is still loving), but did so anyway. He's that scared of his brothers finding out that he's half-werewolf.
    • The very conflict between Jaan and Solon is straight-up depressing, from the time Jaan had went from Solon's side to another in an instant no longer being Played for Laughs, to revealing that Jaan and Solon had a terrible fight six years back, which resulted in their current relationship status.
    • The incident between Noa and Solon, which was Noa being accidentally clawed by Solon, who couldn't control his werewolf instincts, has traumatized Solon so much that he was too terrified to transform, despite him clearly needing to do so at this point due to years of suppressing his werewolf urges.
    • The fact that half of his brothers had negative reactions to his werewolf half (Heli was even among them) was sad enough, especially as they verbally attacked him with werewolf slurs then tried to physically attack him, but Solon seemed to have expected all of them would react that way. Although Solon was Trying Not to Cry, he still did so anyway because he didn't expect it to hurt that bad.
    • By the time they had their Jerkass Realization, Jakah had figured out who the hunters were really after, and Solon is missing...
    • A day after Solon's rescue, he finally lets out all his bottled up fury and disappointment at his brothers for all their mistreatment over the years. At one point, he attacks Jaan, but when he gets reminded of the incident with Noa, he backs off fearfully.
  • A minor moment, but Solon was deeply hurt when he thought Enzy ratted him out to his brothers.
  • Solon was beyond terrified after he realized that hunters somehow found out about his heritage and are coming after him. And when Enzy promised that they wouldn't let him be taken by them, he bawled onto Enzy's chest. Even the werewolves were sad as well, wondering how hard Solon's life must've been for him bottle up all his fears and traumas.
  • Solon briefly angsts about his jealousy over Sooha easily fitting in with his brothers, something he struggled to do for many years, even before he discovered his hybrid heritage.
  • Solon's nightmare isn't just scary, it's also sad, as it shows how much he thinks his brothers hate him. Sweet and warm Jino coldly glares at him, Noa and Jakah, who both greatly admire him (and Noa who has a crush on him) kick him multiple times. Then Shion, who teases him a lot but is arguably one of the more supportive ones of Solon, suggests selling him to the hunters that are looking for him. And Solon could only watch in horror as everyone immediately agrees, even when he begs Heli to reconsider. Then Jaan, the brother who Solon is practically estranged from, violently manhandles Solon into a cemetery.
  • Solon's kidnapping is actually pretty sad, as his worst fear was coming true. To make things worse, this was exactly right after The Reveal of his hybrid heritage to his brothers, and as mentioned above, they did not take it well. Exactly like the nightmare he had in the beginning of the chapter!
  • In the flashback to Solon and the vampires' childhood, when the Vamfield field orphanage burned down, unlike canon, there actually was causalities, who were all children. And Solon (who was only nine years old at the time) was lucky enough to hear them scream as they burned to death.
    • By the time Solon finished relieving the memory, he was crying.
  • Literally everything Richard did to Solon. Openly lusting over him even though he's uncomfortable, making him relive the worst day of his life (and learning the truth behind it), manipulating the boy into thinking that no one in his life, not even Enzy, truly loved him, threatening to kill every single one of his loved ones should he not submit to his desires, then raped him. To make things worse, the chapter ended with Solon sobbing brokenly, thinking that he's worthless now.
    • It's heavily implied that Solon was so traumatized by the whole ordeal that he got PTSD from it. Hell, when he first saw Marge, he had a panic attack because her hair and eye colors were identical to Richard's. Keep in mind that this scene takes place around 6 years in the future. He's that traumatized.
  • Even Noa's unrequited love for Solon somehow manages to be depressing, as it's obvious that Solon sees Noa as his baby brother and is deeply in love with Enzy. By the time he finally confesses to Solon how he feels, the poor guy has become so bitterly resigned to the truth that he stopped Solon from saying his rejection. Solon himself felt as sad as Noa.
    Noa: (a bitter chuckle leaving his lips) Don't feel bad for me, please.
    • His reaction to finding out that Solon and Enzy are together is subtle, but no less sad. Since werewolves Cannot Tell a Lie, Enzy immediately admits to the vampires that he is dating their brother, and while everyone else comically interrogates him, outraged to hear that someone is seeing their brother, Noa just quietly questions it, unable to believe that someone has taken Solon as theirs since he's unable to.
  • The story of Solon' parents is bittersweet. They couldn't openly love each other because of the vampire-werewolf war and ended up running away from their families in order to be together. Not even 1 year in their new life with their son and hunters have found them, and they end up getting killed unsure if their baby made it out safely.
  • When Solon wakes up from the dream with his deceased parents, he hugs himself to feel the warmth they gave him... and felt nothing.
  • In the bonus chapter, while convincing Sooha to hear his brothers out, Solon mentions that his brothers considered burning him to a stake to hide their heritage from her. Solon didn't lie when he said he would never forget the old scars his brothers made.


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