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  • Jimmy: "Did anyone ever tell you, you look like a penis with a little hat on?"
    • And after the umpire gets rightfully upset with him, Jimmy tries to claim that he "misunderstood" him.
  • "Nice piece of coaching, Jimmy! I especially liked that move in the 5th inning, where you scratched your balls for an hour."
    Jimmy: Anything worth doing is worth doing right.
  • Moments later, after Jimmy spits a clump of chewing tobacco onto Lowenstein's shoe:
    Ira: If we paid you a little bit more, Jimmy, do you think you could be just a little more disgusting?
    Jimmy: Well, I could certainly use the money.
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  • The Running Gags about Marla's appearance. It seems a bit cruel, but her happy ending with Nelson makes up for it.
  • Jimmy's prayer, including thanking God for a waitress in South Bend he implicitly had sex with. Evelyn's Eye Take when he starts talking about that sells it.
    Jimmy: You know who she is. She kept shouting your name.
  • Jimmy visibly trying to hold back his anger while lecturing Evelyn after she once again botches a throw to the cutoff man.
  • Although it dips a little into Comedic Sociopathy, Mae poisoning Miss Cuthbert's dinner so that the girls can have a night on the town:
    Doctor: I have to say in all my years of medical practice, I've never seen a woman throw up that much.
  • Jimmy autographing a little kid's baseball. "Avoid the clap. Jimmy Dugan."note 
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  • Jimmy and Dottie going back and forth giving Marla batting signals.
  • Jimmy has a lot of these. "YOU ZIP IT DORIS!"
  • The entire scene at the charm school:
    • Instead of moving gracefully in the first part, Marla's arm is stock straight and moves very fast,
    • During the same scene, Mae is staring at Mr. Lowenstein the entire time with a sexy look, with him clearly uncomfortable at the flirting.
    • During the tea drinking scene, instead of drinking the tea, Doris is stuffing her face with the tea cookies and ignoring Kit telling her to stop.
    • "Legs always together. A lady reveals nothing". Kit cracking up at that line (and Dottie admonishing her) is actually Lori Petty corpsing (and Geena Davis upset at the messed up take).
    • The beauty school teacher's suggestion for Marla? "A lot of night games."
  • "You're gonna lo-ose! You're gonna lo-ose!"
    • After he gets Dottie back, Jimmy nails Stilwell in the face with a glove, and showing nothing but joy about it. "BAHAHAHAHA! GOT HIM!"
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    • Plus Evelyn's completely unfazed reaction, indicating that she sides with Jimmy and is herself finally fed up with Stillwell's brattiness.
  • Mae teaching Shirley to read—by giving her an erotic novel.
  • Jimmy drunkenly making out with Miss Cuthbert when she attempts to wake him up, and then his reaction afterwards.
    Jimmy: By the way, I loved you in The Wizard of Oz.
  • At the end of the Creative Closing Credits, a mix of Credits Montage and footage of a "Legends Game" with the old players, an old player argues a called strike with the umpire. She even discreetly kicks dirt on his shoes!
    Umpire: Yesterday it might've been a ball, tomorrow it might be a ball, but today it's a strike!
  • For a guy who's only on screen about ten minutes, Jon Lovitz scores a stunning number of laughs as Ernie the league scouter.
    Ernie: If I had your job, I'd kill myself. Sit here, I'll see if I can dig up a pistol.
    • At least one of which was apparently an ad-lib:
      Ernie: (to a cow) Will you shut up?
  • Ernie's line for not wanting to sign Marla may be harsh, but hilariously delivered.
    Ernie: You know General Omar Bradley?
    Dottie: Yeah.
    Ernie: There’s too strong a resemblance.
  • After their night at the Suds Bucket, the Peaches are at confession for the evening. Mae is in with the preacher who's dropped his Bible twice and after she finishes he emerges sweating up a storm.
    Doris: Mae, what did you tell him?!
  • The Peaches are trying all kinds of stunts to draw attention to the women's league to keep it going and then there's Mae's suggestion.
    Mae: What if at a key moment in the game, my uniform bursts open and, uh, oops! My bosoms come flying out. That might draw a crowd, right?
    Doris: You think there are men in this country who ain't seen your bosoms?
  • When Mae is teaching Shirley how to read, the look on Shirley's face when she realizes exactly what kind of book she's reading says it all.
    Shirley: Milky... white... breeee—breasts. (her eyes go wide)
    Mae: It gets really good after that. (flips page) "The delivery boy walks in..."
  • A meta example. On the official website of the AAGPBL, it's mentioned that if you ask the surviving players which of them was the inspiration for Madonna's character, they will all raise their hands.
  • The opposing catcher and manager's reaction to Dottie catching a foul pop up by doing a split.
    Catcher: I can't do that!
    Manager: Who can?!

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