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Series / C'Mon Midffîld!

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C'mon Midffîld! ("Come on Midfield!") was a Welsh Sitcom created in 1988 that ran for six series until 1994. One of the most successful Welsh-language comedies, it focused on the fictional village of Bryncoch just outside of Caernarfon, but most importantly on the village football team committee. The main cast consists of team captain quick-to-anger captain Arthur Picton, his Bumbling Sidekick Walter "Wali" Tomos, and rounded up by the Only Sane Man Tecwyn Parri (who also serves as the team's goalie). Part of the main cast outside of the footy committee was Mr Picton's daughter, Sandra, and her boyfriend/husband and member of the football team, George - a leather-clad punk rocker from Caernarfon. Naturally, Mr Picton doesn't get on with his son-in-law.

Although it is in Welsh, the subtitles are only available in English and translated pretty well, managing to substitute Welsh puns with English ones. The show is well-known in north Wales and its stars went on to become successes; Tecwyn was played by famous Welsh-language musician Bryn Fon, and Mr Picton (John Pierce Jones) became an actor on the Big Screen, starring in films like Lesbian Vampire Killers. There was a reunion special in 2005, inspired by a similar reunion special of Only Fools and Horses.

This show provides examples of:

  • Big "WHAT?!": In this case "Be!?"; Mr Picton's reaction to most of Wali's statements.
  • Blind Without 'Em: In one episode, Mr Picton and a newly signed player go to a meeting, and is wearing Wali's glasses. When Wali is called in as a witness, he can't even find the meeting in the room. To prove his defect, Wali asks him to read a notice on the wall. His response is "What wall?".
  • Brick Joke: In "Yr Italian Job", the hour-long Special, Bryncoch FC and their committy (Sandra tricks them into letting her go as well) go to Italy. Wali has just learned an Italian phrase after seeing it in a magazine, and asks Tecwyn what it means. The answer is "I'm having a baby in 6 months". Later on, an Italian footballer is trying to get Sandra to cheat with him. She says Wali's phrase as an excuse and slides out of there.
    • A literal one appears in one episode, involving Wali's uncle (a builder) ordering 499 bricks, no more, no less. However, the store only sells them in packs of 500. So Uncle Rufus chucks the extra brick right over the wall (Arthur is furious that the story doesn't go anywhere). When George tells a different joke, he asks the rest to guess what is in someone's mouth. Wali is quick to reply "a brick".
  • Bumbling Sidekick: Wali.
  • Catchphrase: Mr Picton, when angry, will yell "ASIFFETA!" at the top of his voice. He often responds in disbelief with a Big "WHAT?!".
  • Character Name Alias: Played for Laughs in "Traed Moch". A referee comes to investigate accusations of dirty playing, so Mr Picton informs Wali that they must use fake names. Wali tells the referee his name is "Duck, Donald", which angers him, thinking they are taking the micky. Picton tells Wali to use a real person's name, leading to this bit:
    Ref: Name?
    Arthur: Ned Thompson.
    Ref: And you?
    Wali: Arthur Picton.
  • Cringe Comedy: A really painful one in the episode where Sandra and George get married. After the credits, we get a clip of Wali running up to a crowd in the church, pouring rice into his hand and chucking it at the crowd, yelling "CONGRATULATIONS!". He's missed the wedding and has just arrived at a funeral.
  • Dirty Cop: A Policeman finds out that Mr Picton's drivers' license is forged and blackmails him into letting the Policeman join the team, despite how awful the Policeman is at playing.
  • Downer Ending: The football team gets sold and Wali performs a depressing song complete with flashbacks.
  • Gosh Darn It to Heck!: The offensive insults spewed out by Mr Picton (and on a regular basis, too) are always Welsh words ("penci", "twmffat", "ast"). Considering he normally has no problem using random English words, and that it aired in the early nineties, it's clear it's thanks to censorship.
  • Idiot Savant: For his ignorance, Wali is actually very skilled at making witty snarks (see Brick Joke entry above).
  • Insistent Terminology: In the special, most of the Italian footballers keep referring to them as "English" (one is surprised that they are cheering for the other team when watching a match on TV). The only phrase all of them were required to learn in Italian was "We are not English, we are Welsh".
  • Jerkass: Mr Picton and George.
  • Large Ham: Mr Picton complements his large stature with a loud voie. And also with Wali as the referee - WALIIIII!
  • Miranda Rights: Said in Welsh in one episode after the crew are arrested.
  • Not What It Looks Like: Wali getting caught dancing shirtless on a pub table surrounded by women while humming.
  • Only Sane Man: Tecwyn is this. Mr Picton sees himself as one, but his temper often causes him to make bad judgements.
  • Something That Begins with "Boring": While in prison, the crew play Eye Spy. Naturally, Wali screws it up.
    Wali: Dwi'n gweld efo fy llygad bach i, rhwbath yn dechra efo "d".
    Picton: Drws? (Door)
    Wali: Nac di! (Nope!)
    Picton: Oce... (holds out hands) Dwylo! (Hands)
    Wali: Nac di!
    Picton: (holds up fist) "Dwrn"!?
    Wali: Nac di!
    Picton: Dafad? (Sheep)
    Wali: Nac di!
    Picton: Dw'n im. (Don't know)
    Wali: Nac di!
    Picton: Be ydi hi ta!? (Well what is it then!?)
    Wali: Ti'n "give up"? ("Are you give up")
    Picton: Yndw! (Yes)
    Wali: Dau pru! (Two flies)
    (Before Mr Picton can react, a Policeman opens the cell)

  • Speech Impediment: Wali mumbles while talking, and he also cannot pronounce "R" correctly (when speaking English in one episode, he says "Voy" instead of "Roy")
  • The Western: Wali's voice-over reads a western book aloud, and it syncs up with the events of the episode.
    Wali's voice: "The sheriff walked into the saloon".
    (Policeman walks into the pub)
    Wali's voice: "Voy Mc-Coy looked up at him".
    (George gets up and looks at the Policeman)
    Hilarity Ensues