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The Editing Room
The Running Gag from the articles of the audience noticing Harry Potter Emma Watson and having to back out of sexual innuendos, up until the script, where she reveals she's now legal.
Half-Blood Prince This moment from the script for :
Killer Elite Jason Statham:
Time to put on my best grim expression, go kick some ass, and find the bastards who kidnapped that Chinese girl.
Jason Statham: You're right - I mean, find the bastards who kidnapped that Chinese girl's family.
Jason Statham: The bastards who kidnapped that Chinese doctor?
Jason Statham: The Chinese bastard who kidnapped me?
Jason Statham: The Chinese bastard who killed my colleague?
Jason Statham: The bastards who injected me with Chinese poison?
Jason Statham: The Chinese bastards who cut me open?
Jason Statham: Well if there isn't anyone Chinese in this movie, what the bloody fuck am I supposed to be doing?
From the script for :
CHRIS hammers the FUCK out of THE ROBOT, hammers the FUCK out of some FROST GIANTS, hammers the FUCK out of
, and hammers the FUCK out of the RAINBOW BRIDGE.
During the script for :
The Mummy 1999 Script: ARNOLD attacks BRENDAN but BRENDAN instead kills him using a talisman or some other shit, I wasn't really paying attention.
The image caption for .
The Cabin in the Woods In the script for , X-Men: First Class Kevin Bacon's plan is so ridiculous that they actually stop the movie to hold a symposium about how stupid it is, which lasts about 4 months.
The script for . All of it.
Pokémon The script for being very clear about how Ray has a The Princess and the Frog Family-Unfriendly Death, or, as they put it, Keith David "KILLS HIM TO DEATH WITH MURDER".
The script for doesn't even use an actual screenshot. Just a picture of LEGO The LEGO Movie Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, and Green Lantern.
) Boo! I'm Batman! Hey, shouldn't I be "CGI
FUCK THAT, YOU'RE BATMAN.
This exchange from where a big The Wolverine Plot Hole is pointed out.
HAL YAMANOUCHI: Hugh, I've asked you here to reward you. Your reward is: give me your healing powers.
HUGH JACKMAN: You seem a little misinformed as to how rewards work.
HAL YAMANOUCHI: No, think about it. You hate your life, don't want to be The Wolverine any more and look forward to death. By making you mortal I'm pretty much granting your deepest desires.
HUGH JACKMAN: ...Huh, that's true. At this point of my character arc this should be an irresistible offer. So, hmm, what's a compelling reason for me to say no?
HUGH JACKMAN: Ah, reasons are for pussies. Shove your release from eternal suffering up your ass.
The fact that they combined and No Strings Attached into Friends with Benefits one script because of how alike they were.
The ending of the script for Journey 2: the Mysterious Island, where things get so ridiculous that everyone's Willing Suspension of Disbelief actually snaps!
The site turns the plot of into a war between Super 8 Steven Spielberg and J. J. Abrams.
Hmm, the Sheriff being taken out by a menacing, barely-glimpsed CGI monster sounds like the work of J.J. Abrams. Yet the movie bending over backwards to make sure we know all the dogs are safe spells 80's Spielberg.
CUE: DRAMATIC CHORD
Random cop: Come on, Kyle, that movie sucked in the 80s AND present day. Let's aim a LITTLE higher.
Random cop: Too high.
The Expendables Jason Statham: Right, sure, but awesomely bad. I get it.
Sylvester Stallone: No, awesomely awesome. Dude, look how many muscles I have. I look like a goddamned wad of bubble wrap. This is the best movie ever made.
A marvelous Lampshade Hanging from the script to .
King Kong Adrien Brody's nose:
Naomi! Come down from there! I love you!
I'm sorry, Adrian! I'm in love with this ape.
Adrien Brody's nose:
Then I shall write a play for you in which you fall in love with an ape!
Are you crazy? Who would watch a human woman fall in love with an ape and think of it as anything but a ridiculous joke? Seriously, it would be completely absurd!
Adrien Brody's nose:
What if I made it a three hour long play so that people forget what they're actually watching?
That would only make matters worse! The pretentiousness of a three hour story about a woman and an ape ought to be enough to kill the careers of everyone involved!
It DOESN'T. Suddenly, PLANES shoot at KING KONG and he falls and dies.