((OOC: Sorry to do this, MM, but I have to get my plan back on track.))
"How dare you ask us to do our dirty work for you?!" said Samantha Imperiously (u go girl!). "Do yu know who I am? I am the daugther of the High Queen of Mary Sues!!!!!1111" Then she used lightning on Gladdos and Aryll joined her too as she was a vampite and can control d weather.
"I'm sorryt!" said Glasos whimperingly.
"Ressureck Aoshiro at once!" Samantha said preparing to ligthning Glados again.
"OK! OK!" said Gla Do S and she masde Aoshiro alive again.
Hello there! This is Aoshiro Hitsugayt and I'm glad to be alife again. Anyway I had Gla Do S ressurect Ogron as well as I wanted to get teh details from him. I and Indigo and Hei tied up the other Wizards (they surrendered when Glados came) and told them: "Tell me who teh Man Behind the Man is or we'll kill u!"
"All right, I'll tell." said Ogron. "The person behind this is Kazukata Muraki from Yami No Matsuei. You see, he plans to use Tokyo's nature as center of the universe to make himself ruler of The Multiverse."
"That's Awful!" Samantha stated. "How will he du that?
"For his plan to work, he needs to sacrifice 50 Shinigami Marty Stus, 40 Mage Mary Sues with powers from Fairy Tail, 100 Fanfic Authors, 70 Vampire Mary Sues, and 10 Daugthers of the High Queen of Mary Sues."
"Dam that Muraki!!1" I said Angrily. "We must stop him be4 he makes that plan com tru!"
"It's too late," said Ogron. "Thanks to us and the other evil minions he hired, he has already killed 49 Shinigami, 39 Mages, 99 Fanfic Authors, 69 Vampires and 9 of the 10 daugthers of the High Queen of Mary Sues. That leaves only your group, who he can hunt down at lesiure."
"When did this happen?!" I asked. Samantha cried becuz her sisters ar all dead.
"When you left for Neo-Venezia to shut down the pollution factories."
"DAMN IT!!!!!!11111" I shooted. "Gla Do S! do with these pple as u will (even getting them tu kill Cloud)! I'll stop Muraki. Btw, where is he?"
"Tokyo Tower," said Ogron. "He's waiting for you."
We then zoomed to Tokyo Tower using magic! There, we found a Cult made up of Fangits who didn't see Muraki for the Pedo Rapist that he is. They had sticks with nails attached to them and they were chanting obcesnc chants around a fire. They didn't see us so we charged out and attacked!
I cut a Fangirl in half, then stabbed another thru d ballz. Indigo used a Magic Glaive
and cut off a lot of legs. Arthur used his Author powers to hit Fangits with Anvils while Aryll Mind Controlled Fangirls into bashing themselves with their own sticks with nails.
Hei and Samantha killed a lot of Fangits too, then made out. They then cremated teh corpses in teh fire. Then we went up to the room atop Tokyo Tower, where Muraki was waiting!
He was sitting on a chair like that used by officepreps in teh office. He looked slightly bored as if he hadf been expecting us early. We then drew out our weapons and prepared to call him out.
"PREPARE TO DIE AND BE KILLED MURAKI!!!1111" I shooted angrily. "I will avenge my sisters!" Samantha said be4 crying. Hei then gave her a hug to confort het. "U will die sexily!" said Indigo then Arthur said: "Have you got anything to say for yourself?"
"Merely this," said Muraki. "Do you know why so many weird things happen here, on this city? Shinigami, Mages, Fanfic Authors and Na'vi Chosen of Mystra all in one place, doesn't it make you wonder?"
"I no teh reason why so much weird shit happens, it's becuz Tokyo Is the Center of the Universe!" I screamed.
"But why, exactly? Even if Tokyo is a very important city, surely it cannot defy the laws of Astronomy, which state that the Earth itself is constantly moving. Such a thing would be absurd, but it happened."
"Now, what if somebody made Tokyo the center of the Universe? What if that being, right now, is buried within the depths of this building, waiting for someone with the least bit of Necromantic knowledge to come by her and bend her to his will?" He then rose up and made a magical gesture.
"I call upon you, daugther of the first Fanfic Author and Authoress in this verse! I call upon you, angry ghost who seeks vengance upon the world! Have your fill of blood, Charlot!"
Then teh Ghost of Charlot rose frum the ground, and she had two swords of OC Erasing Energy and was looking at us angrily! Oh no!
edited 22nd Feb '11 9:24:24 AM by BadficFetish
The Beta Male
(OOC: HOSHIT, PLOT TWISTS! Damn, gotta admit I didn't see that coming. Kudos! Oh, and hi, MM.)
AN:... fuck u, Charlot.
Teh Gost of Charlott rose slowly into the air, and all the windows breaked! Then the glass from the windows started swrling arund her in clouds of Evil dark enerjy that Loked like Smoke but wasnt. Then crows fromall Around the City came swrling around ehr and caw and screming!
"Oh, shit." sayd Arthur.
I was afred of Charlot, but I wasnt scarred bcuz i was new i was going to defete her. ! Maybe.
Charlotte then swinged her swords and we doged just in time. The sords hisses thru the air and leved hissing currents of enerjy ijn there wake
"I HAT U ALL FOAR BANNING ME AND U IGNORED MY IDREAS, SO I WILL DESTROY U! " she scremed Over The din of teh winds!
I hatsily drawed my zanpaktou and than indigo got ou her stabing nife and hber wakizashi. Samantha spred her wings and drew her shortsord that was rainbow Colord. Arthur readied his notpad and stratened his shitr coller. Hei got out 2 Uzis. Aryll redied balls of drak Energy in Her hands. Jimmy ran off liek the pussy he was
We wer al scard bcuz at this point she had started shouting Somthing About Zalgo.
Arthur swore agen. I agreed with him
Charloet raised her swords agen and cakled insanly, them, with a maniicle gleem in her G Lowing white eyes, brot them down as hard as esh could.
AN: blakmail IS NOT COOL, CHARLOTT! leve revews.plz kthx
(OOC: Oh, the suspense!)
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
The Shockwave knocked us back! Charlot held her swords in a Reverse Grip (which was cool even though she's the enemy and we're scared) and charged toward me. I parried with my zanpaktou but then, I realized that it counted as an OC, as zanpaktous are people! My zanpaktou dissolved and only the hilt was left. I was left gasping on the ground as Charlot laughed.
Then Arthur was next! He also had two swords made of OC Erasing Energy as he was a Fanfic Author like Charlot. They fought for several seconds and I tought that Arthur could win. But he didn't! Charlot bashed him on the stomach with the hilt of her sword and said:
"So this is how my brother's bloodline thins out? I should have sterilized him during our Incest sessions long ago!" She then laughed and said: "And I Must Scream Jutsu!" Arthur was then trapped in crystal, which was bad for him as he was an Immortal and will eternally suffocate!
Indigo said: "How dare u do that to Aoshiro and Arthur? God-Mode Sue armour!" There was a golden glow, and Indigo was in armour made of Gold, Mithril, and Jade. She then rushed Charlott! Teh Fanfic Author Ghost played aroung with her for a wile, then cut off her armour, leaving her naked!
"I'll molest you later, hot stuff," said Charlot before she fought Aryll, Hei, and Samantha! Teh three attacked her frum 3 directions. Aryll thried to use Necromancy at Charlot as Vampires can do that, but Charlot was not in a mood to be controlled. Hei shot at Charlot, but she was a ghost and bullets just went through her.
Samantha fought hardest, flyng at Charlot and using her Mary Sue powers. She used her sword that she used to fight the Na'vi Chosen of Mystra a long tim ago. But Charlot wasn't just a Fanfic Author, she was the Child of the First Fanfic Author and Authoress that existed in this verse! Samantha wuz defeeted.
Then, just as the Princess of Mary Sues was about to be impaled by Charlot, a Rainbow Portal opened! From it came a Hot Amazon who had armour like Xena Warrior Princess and a Bow and Arrows like from Exalted.
"I will not let you harm my daugther!" Teh Mysterious Warrior said. It was........The High Quen of Mary Sues!
edited 30th Nov '10 3:01:01 AM by BadficFetish
Orbs
Mary Sue belowed: "FAAAAAAARK!!!!" as optimoose Pr1m arriv3d.
Opt1mus sed: "One Shall Fall 2097, Mega Sue!"
Nega Siue quickly tranbsdgfoerhmed herself into teh Princess, putting his fuison cannon in her (SENXORED)_ Woompie.
Optimonkuy sed: "Waht! How dear U?"
Thenm a houge red blaming bourn1nmg asteriod c4m3 carshing down from teh sky, nekkid striptease dancers danzing on top of itrs rocken bear fl`zsh, pulled by a mlotorcycle upon whicgh a Furry skeleton flew.
edited 30th Nov '10 3:19:43 AM by TheStupidExclamationMark
"That said, as I've mentioned before, apart from the helmet, he's not exactly bad looking, if a bit...blood-drenched." - juancarlos
Teh High Queen of Mary Sues shot at Charlot! The arrow was magic and hit her even though she was a ghost. Charlot screamed but she recovered and rushed towards the High Queen, who took out a Dao and began figthing in melee!
There were sparks from where the High Queen of Mary Sues' sword clashed with Charlot's. The Fanfic Author gohst had blades of OC Erasing Energy but they were useless as they weren't able to hit the High Queen.
Charlot screamed angrily. She jumped up and began using her sords like helicopter blades so that she can fly. Teh Fanfic Author ghost shot beam from her eyes but they were deflected by teh High Queen's sword.
"This is your end, Charlot!" cried the High Queen of Mary Sues. "Prepare for all you have done to be reversed!" Great Wings even bigger than Samantha's extended from her, and a Field of Blades suddenly appeared beneath her feet.
The blades suddenly flew up and impaled Charlot! There was a flash of bright light, and the Evil Fanfic Author Ghost was gone! My Zanpaktou was back, Arthur was free from the And I Must Scream Jutsu, and Indigo was not naked anymore!
It's over," said the High Queen and she flew towards Muraki. But then, the Na'vi Chosen of Mystra from before suddenly appeared and grabbed her in the Standard Female Grab Area (that's the wrist, u pervets), making her a Faux Action Girl (that only works on the High Queen of Mary Sues, though).
"Perfect," said Muraki. "She will make a good substitute sacrifice."
edited 2nd Dec '10 1:42:03 AM by BadficFetish
((OOC: Something I tought up while waiting for Game Spazzer.))
Oneshot: The Tale of the Origins of the Verse, Including the First Fanwriters and their Offspring (Charlot and Her Twin Included).
An age ago, the world was a swirl of raw energies, emanating from the Fourth Wall without any purpose or organisation. It was pure chaos, of the kind that was too disordered to achive conciousness. This realm of raw power was ripe for the taking, easily shaped by any being with the right set of talents.
In the end, it was a Fanfic Author and Authoress banished from their own dimension who did so. Desiring to create a realm of unbridled gratification, they took control of the nascent universe and turned its potential for their own purposes.
A bright kingdom where logic was subordinated to desire was the result. There were many cities of gaudy glory, peopled by many races that lived only to obey their creators. In time, the First Two Fanwriters took the ones that had the quality called the 'hotness' and had pleasure from them, and later from each other.
The Sueryans were born from the union between the Badficcers and the subject races, while the other Fanfic Authors were born from the union of the First Fanwriters with each other. The first and greatest of these were Charlot and her twin, (Name Classified for Security Reasons).
The two were great and powerful, carving out their own Kingdoms. They duplicated or stole people and places from all over The Multiverse, imposing an order that gratified them. However, (Top Secret) grew tired of his sister and his realm, and married an ordinary woman, siring a family through her.
Charlot's rage knew no bounds. She killed her parents, who were now bloated by ceaseless indulgence, and fought with her brother in the skies above Tokyo. In the end, she lost the battle and her life. But her brother fell too, dying before he was able to warn anyone of his sister's lingering prescence.
And so Tokyo became the Center of the Universe,where Sueryan and Fanfic Author roamed freely in their many adventures.
And now back to our regularly scheduled Badfic!
edited 7th Dec '10 6:58:41 AM by BadficFetish
The Beta Male
(OCC: Bravo! -clap clap clap- Everyone loves backstory. Especially backstory with sentences! -choir music plays- Erm, anyhow....)
An:oh noz! The sacerfice mite stil b don! What will happen now Alos fuk u i dint updat becuz ah wantid 2c at lest 5 gud revews bcuz u fuking prepz SUK!! FUK U PREPZ! U NED 2 GIV ME GUD REVEWS OR AH WILL SILT MT RISTS AND GO TO DA HOPITALS!!! U DONT UNDERANS HOW DARK AND SERIOUWSE DA STORY IS AND HOW IT DELLS WIT HUMIN EMOSHIOUNS! Oh and now that I no how to get da caps untuk, the chaptah will b in all caps 4 dramaetec afet!
NOOOOO MOTHER! "SAD SAMANTHA, HER GOLDEN AND BLUE AND MAGENTA EYES GOT ALL TERRY AND SHE WAS SCAREDLY TERIFY.
INDIGO WAS SO ANGRY BECUZ HER FREND WAS IN DANGER. THAT SHE. TOOKED OF HER CLOTHS FOR USE BETTER ARMER! I CHERED AT THAT BCUZ SHE WAS HAWT AND HAD A NICE ASS.
THE HIGH QUEEN OF MARY SUES WAS STRUGGLYING A LOT BUT THEN SHE COUDNT GET AWAY BCUZ SHE WAS WORIED SHE WOUD CUT HER ARM ON HIS HANDS... OR SOMETHING.
THEN ARTHUR AND AOSHIRO CHARGED AND ARTHUR SEDD BALLFUL POLYMORF ATTAK TOCHAMGE DA. NA'VI chOSEN OF MYSTRA INTO A DUCK BUT HE BLOKED IT WITH A SPELL AND WER NOKED AWAY AND THE LANDED INTO INGIDO AND THEN TTHEY WER FALL OVER!!!!! TEN HE STRAPED HER DOWN 2 A CONVENIENTLY PLACED TABLE AND STARTED CHAMTING|!!!
THEN I GARBED INDIGOS ASS AND SHE FLUTTERD HER WINGS AND I HAD NEVAR NOTICE BEFORE!!(AN: lolc wat i did thar)
I SED ZOMG U HAVE WINGS! THEN SHE LOOKD AT AOSHIRO AND SDED YES I AM PART BAT. THEN WE PICKED UP R WEPONZ SEXXAHLY AND GOT REDY TO FITE. AND THEN AOSHIRO GRABD HER AS ON MOR TIEM.
THEN THE FURY SKELETON GOT TORN APART BY THE NA'VI CHOSEN OF MYRTSA AND THEN SETED ON FIRE BY MURAKI LOL
HEI TRIED TO FITE BUUT THEN HE SAW THE NAVI SHOT A HEYLISTEN LAZOR AT HER AND THEN HE JUMPED IN THE WAY ANDWS LAZORD! IN THE WAY ANDWS LAZORD!
"I LUV U" HEI SED SEXXAHLY B4 HE DIDE! SAM sTARTED CRYIEING AND BECUZ HER MOM WAS ABOT 2 B SACRIFIECED LOL! AOSHIRO SED NO, AND THEN I LOKED AT ARTHUR AND HE WAS RELLY ANGRY AND THEN HE GOT SO MAD THET MURAKI S HE'D EXPOLD!! BUT THE NA'VI WAS RAISING THE NIFE AND CHANTING SLOWLY
HE WAS SAY "O GRET CHARLOT WE OFFER THIS TRIBUT TO U IN HPOES U WIL REEK UR VEGANS ON EVERY 1 AND REWARD UR SERVENS! "
THEN HE SED SUM MOR STUFF ABOT ZALGO WICH WAS SCARY LOL THEN A LOW MONING NOISE FILLD THE AIR AS MAGIC STARTED TO HAPEN AS MAGIC STARTED TO PHAEN!
"Oh NO WHAT WIL WE DO!" I YELLD BADLY.
(OOC: Feel free to ressurect Hei in the next chapter as though nothing happened. Or whatever.)
edited 7th Dec '10 6:10:29 AM by GameSpazzer
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
Then suddenly, Indigo began doing her own ritual! She createed Instant Runes and was chanting a speedy spell. Even the Na'vi Chosen of Mystra stopped his ritual which was a big mistake because when Indigo finished her chant, Mystra herself came out!
"Why have I been summoned here?" the Goddess of Arcane Magic said.
"Your servant was being a bad person! He was going to smite the High Queen of Mary Sues as part of a ritual to gain more power!" Indigo exclaimed sexily.
"WHAT!?" said Mystra as she was a Mary Sue herself and was a servant of teh High Queen because of that. Then she looked at the altar and saw the High Queen strapped there, as well as the Na'vi's knife. She grew angry.
"You are no longer my Chosen!" said Mystra and she removed the Na'vi's powers. "Brave heroes and heroines, do with him as you wish!" Then she left.
I grinned as I remembered that my Zanpaktou than can use Harry Potter spellz had been repaired. I then moved foreward and jammed it into the Na'vi (Not) Chosen of Mystra's braid! I then used Crucio over and over again until the Na'vi died of pain. Indigo, Arthur, and friends loocked shocked but that diddn't matter becux I'm a sadist.
Now I turned my face towards the chair that Muraki had once sat on before he was exploded by Arthur. I was surprised as Muraki's remains have vanished!
"He'll come back again," said Arthur. "When you inflict death using Authorial Powers, it doesn't always take. He won't be appearing until at least one more arc has passed, though."
"That's okay!" I said. "Now we can celebrate!" We had the High Queen of Maru Sues ressurect Hei in order to recomplete our group. Then we went back to the cafe where we came to rescue Arthur and had a big party! There was lots of Coffe and Tea and Cake and Candy.
As Hei wasn't well enough to do sex yet, I, Indigo and Samantha had an orgy on the roof. There was lots of thrusting and grunting and we all drank wine to make things more erodic. It lasted for hours and when we were done, Aryll had repaired her house while Arthur had apologized to his parents for the damage done to teh Bakery.
Three weeks later, we were all at school and it was Recess. We all got out food from Aizen's masion at Hueco Mundo as the Cafeteria food sucked. Suddenly, our cellphones rang!
It was the High Queen of Mary Sues. She said: "Uchia Madara has kidnapped Worf and is planning to sacrifice him in a ritual to inflict The Worf Effect on everyone who isn't him!"
"What's with all these Rituals?!" I exclaimed. "Where is he?" I asked the High Quen.
"Icecrown."
edited 7th Dec '10 8:04:39 AM by BadficFetish
"Ok we'll be there!" I said. Then I and Indigo created a portal to Azeroth. Arthur, Samantha and Aryll followed. It was cold out as we were in Icecrown Citadel just as Tirion Fording and a Raid were all set up to destroy the Lich King (if u don't no who he is already then u ar a goff or prep!). We joined the Paladin and the Raid becase we wire that awsome.
We went through the halls killing enemies and bosses. We got out lots of gold which we sent to Aizen's mansion so that we can keep ourselves rich. I flirted with some babes and so did Indigo who also flirted with boys.
Finally, we got to where the Lich King was......and Uchia Madara was with him, ready for batttle!
Mangekyo Sharingan!" shooted Madara at Tirion and the Raid. They were then paralyzed and began screaming in paine. Now only we were left to figth them! I and Indigo went off to fight the Lich King, while Arthur, Aryll, and Samantha faced Madara. Then the battles began!
I pointed my Zanpaktou at the Lich King and said: "BANKAI!". As You Know, my Bankai was a Dragon that can transform in2 any Harry Potter spellz. In dis case, the Bankai was.....Incendio! A dragon of fire then blew the Lich King away, but he was still alive!
Indigo got out sum really heavy armour from Fairy Tail and said: "Prepare to die, u big Bastrad!" She and I then charged!
Meanwhile, Madara was surrounded by a firestorm of Authorial energy, Mary Sue magic, and Vampire powers as Arthur, Samantha, and Aryll tried their best to defeat him. Arthur tried to destroy the Illusions Nadara used, Samantha tried to kill him to death, and Aryll tried to use Illusions of her own at the Ninja.
"U CANNUT WIN!" Said Mandara and he burned them all with Black Flames! They all screamed.
Then, Tirion broke out of the Mangekyo Sharingan and attacked Manda with the Ashbringer! But it didn't work! Samantha managed to extinguish the Black Fames using her Mary Sue powers, and said:
"It is you who cannot win!" Then she flew up to the air and began attacking again!
edited 9th Dec '10 9:29:29 AM by BadficFetish
The sword went through Madara, but Samantha used Sueish energy to affect him anyway! Madara screamed in pain. Arthur then used Flames from Shipping Forums which burned Madara and forced him back. Aryll then used her Vampire powers to smite Madara with rivers of rivers of blood. But Madara was still alive!
Samantha made a mecha which belonged to the High Queen of Mary Sues appear and bash Madara on the head. But the Shinobi just teleported away. He then said: "Enough of this! Even OOC, I can still defeat you all!"
He then took Ashbringer from Fording and attacked the Mecha! It shattered in three hits. He then stabbed Samantha and she screamed and died. Except not as Arthur Retconned the attack out so that it failed.
Madara took three steps towards the Fanfic Author, and said: "Your kind have so many secrets, befitting of the creators of the Verse. I'm glad that I learned some of your arts during my stay here." Arthur gasped. Madara then shouted: "Story Expulsion Technique!!!1111". Arthur was violently expelled for as long as the fight lasted!
But bacause of using the Technique, Madara went even more OOC and said: "I WILL GIV U ALL SURPRISE BUTTSEXX! REGARDLESS OF GENDRE!" But then suddenly, he looked at where the Lick King wus, and saw that...........Indigo and I have defeated him, and were ready to fight!
Prepare tu be destoried, Ucia Madara!" I shooted angrily. "AVADA KEDABRA BANKAI"!
edited 13th Dec '10 4:54:18 AM by BadficFetish
The Beta Male
(OOC: Sorry about the hiatus. My phone's completely busted, and believe it or not, 95% of my contributions to this site have been via phone, so I may not appear vary often of a bit. Anyway....)
AN: FUK U FLAMERZ I CAN UPDAT WENEVAIR I LIEK SO FUKU FLAMWERS!
i THROWED bak my head and laffed and laffed............. but then i wsaw that Ucia #Was still avile! then i saw............ da pink marshmallow zomfg!1!11!!!1100101010!
"Stop calling me that bcuz mai nam iz Kirbeh and i ated ur spell bcuz u guyz cut meh out of da chapeters. "
ten.......HE ATE MAI BANKAI!
holay shit! i sed bcuz he FUCKING ATED MY BANKAI! TAHT IS NOT COOL, DUDE!!11!4!8!15!16!23!42!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
then he ated the licj kings body and Gained hiz Powerz!
THEN shinobi sed "muahahahaha! and also u all suk, especailly u indigo. "then indingo felt sad so she gav me a kwik blowjob to sheer her up. it was sooooooo sexxah. but madara was mad bcuzx e cudent buttsexx pplz so she pulled her off aoshiros cock. :P
and then sonic teh Hedhog Apperd And Stabbed shinobi in teh ballz lol. (AN: DIS 1S 4 U, SARAH!)
then he left.
hei decided to kill Kirbyt and then he is make big enrgy ball!
"HOW DAR U BETRAY US U FUKING PINK SAK OF SHIT!!!" he scremed!
edited 13th Dec '10 1:43:45 PM by GameSpazzer
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
Kirby got het by the Ball of energy and was knocked down temporarilt. But Madara was still too strong for Hei, as he was slightly less OOC than him. Hei got hit by a Mangekyo Sharingan and screamed! Then Kirvy ate Hei and got his powers.
Madara and Indigo then began figthing each other with Giant Fans just like the one Madara used in the fight against the 1st Hokage (Teh Blowjobn thing didn't happen that was an illusion). Meanwhile, I and Aryll made our emergency move.
Aryll used her Vampire powers to drag out a Wraith from Wraith The Oblivion. After I made sure that the wraith won't get away, I began using Dark Arcanoi (look those up u Goffpreps) to torture it along with Crucio. Once it was in enough pain, I began to Soulforge it. It screamed and screamed and screamed and I laughed.
Then, as the weapon took shape, I made the final step: I took out a piece of my own soul and put it in! Finally, my work was finished. I took it out and brandeshed it be4 Madra and Kirly. They both gasped.
What I made from the Wraith was.............A Trope Gun and set of Trope Bullets! It glowed with green-white energy just like Arthur's powes and there were ominus sounds comming out of it. Madara and Kilby began walking away. But it was too late! I shot them with Worf Effect and Badass Decay bullets liek there was no tommorow.
Now U will die!!!!!11111" I said and gloated.
Edit:
I stabbed Madara and said: "Crucio!" Madara began writhing in pain just like the Wraith the weapon was made from. He died unsexily. Then Indigo killed Kirby and Aryll ate him and got his powers. Arthur came back from where Madara's technique had placed him.
"Now let's rescue Worf!" I said cheerily. We then found a secret room on the top of the Tower. There, Worf was tied to a Steak and had lots of Santaist signs carved itno him. There, we found Sasuke making the final preparations for the sacrifice!
I got out my Trope Gun and shot him with Worf Effect bullets!
edited 13th Dec '10 11:56:58 PM by BadficFetish
Sasuke screamed. Then I and Hei attacked him and tied him up with the ropes that had been used on Worf. Then Indigo got out bombs and explosives and put them on Sasuke. After that, we threw him off Icecrown Citadel and watched him explode. It was peinless but humiliating.
Then, we healed Worf and sent him back to The Federation. After that, we went back to the mansion at Hueco Mundo to celebrate. There were lots of food and wine and vodka which we mixed with coffe and milk. Then Arthur left with Aryll to go play arcade games.
Then I and Indigo went to bed and began to sex while Hei and Samantha had sex as well. We had lots of wine and cigarets (we used magic so they weren't bad for us) and everything was hot. Mary Sues and Marty Stus don't have kids except for plot reasons so we didn't need protection. Then we went to sleep.
One Week Later
I was checking my e-mails on my Laptop (Azien's manson had web acess). when suddenly, I saw one from Chiaki and Nodame of Nodame Cantabile. It said: Aoshiro and his adventuring party are invited to Paris for a fest with sake and shushi and lots of music.
"Oh, cool!" I said and called all my friends.
The Beta Male
AN: i wud jest leik 2 say that u all suk bcuz I ONLY GOT 3 FUKING REVIOUWS! WFT?!U PPL NED 2 LEV REVEEWS OR I WIL NOT UPDAT DA STORY! sheesh!
"Um, is it just me (of course it is, you idiot), or does this scream 'trap' from the top of a building with a megaphone while waving a flag at us?" said Arthur.
we all ignorerd him him bcuz his opinin dozent count. he even sed so hisself, dumass.
omg this sounds so kool lets go! " sed ingido so we all went to pak. i also brot a machine gun bcuz then maek things moar fun.
wen we wer all paked, we went to teh areprot were there was a privat jet wating for us. the jet was panted blak with yello stirpz on it and look ed totaly basadd.
the guide syteppeed out of the plan and then said"Hi! I am ur guid for 2day so plz follwo me! " The guide was very tall and wearing a suit and was pale and ahd a hat pulled down ovar his faec wich we couldent see and he was very tall,.
I sed okay! and got on the plane.
Ther was a sad looking flite atendant that glard at us alot that showed Indigo and I to a sextion of the plan (lol geddit) were ther was a matres 4 having sexx on. Arthur had a seat with a tv that showd him different kinds of media 4 him 2 get ideas. sam and hei had a room that had some nic things for drawing and arts and Arylls room had sum gormeiy blood and evry vidoe gam consol evar.
"wow' i sed "this is perfect its almost like they new us"
AN:LEV REVEWS FUKING GOFFPREPS!
(OOC: Sorry about the phrase-steal, but it was too perfect not to use here.)
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
((OOC: It's okay. Also, the return of an old enemy))
In Paris
We went to Nodame and Chaiki's place where there was a feast and music. Chiaki brought out his whole orchestra and served as conductor while Nodame was the pianist. Every1 knew that we were the ones who saved the Universe frum Aizen and Muraki and later Madara so munny was no object.
There were also Whaladons who were glad that we tried to save them even though we failed. There was lots of eating and drinking and we talked a lot about our exploits. Hot Green Skinned Space Babes were there to serve us more drinks.
"Okay, so it wasn't Nodame and Chiaki who were inteding to lure us into a trap," said Arthur. "But don't you think that-"
Suddenly, something exploded outside the mansion! We looked out the window, and we saw that Muraki's Fangirls were attacking. Not just that, but Gauron's fangirls were there too, making them a MOB!
I got out the Machine Gun which I brought, but Chiaki said: "We've got better weapons than that," and got out Machine Gattling Guns from the Piano and the otter musical instruments!
Now it's time for URBAN ACTION!" Nodame said. She gout out a Machine Gattling Gun and so did the other party guests. Indigo, Aryll, Arthur, Samantha and Hei got some Machine Gattling guns too despite having better weapons. Then we began shooting the Fangits!
Some Fangits entered the dining room but were shot by the other party guests. Arthur used his Author powers to give all the gunz Infinite Ammo. There was pots of figthing and figthing as Nodame and Chiaki and the other party guests pooled their money to hire Mercenaries so we can go on the offensive.
Finally, we got the news that an army of Merenaries including Sardaukar and Alchemists and Spartan ii's and Mages and Hunters was heading for the city. We yayed.
"Now," I said, "Let's Hold the Line! Our enemies r swarming around, but we sall not falter because They. Are. Just. Pedofans!" Then we continued shooting.
edited 16th Dec '10 1:26:44 AM by BadficFetish
We kept shooting and shooting and we saw that Draco, Sepiroth, and Joker Fangirls were also joining the attack, even though they weren't with Muraki (Infalliable Babble told me so ok)!
"It must be the Draco in Leather Pants convention!" said Nodame.
"What?" I said curiously.
"The Draco in Leather Pants convention! It's a yearly gathering of Fangits who think that bad guys are good guys because they're hott! They show up in a random city and decide to cooperate on a random thing. I didn't know that they would turn up in Paris or that they would cooperate to destroy us all."
"That is an insane plot twist," said Arthur. "Then again, we were up against the ghost of the Fanfic Author Charlot last time we fought Muraki, so..."
"No mor Meta-vision!" I said angrily. I got out my Trope Gun and shot a Trope Bullet marked Beam Spam at the mob. A lot died and the smell of burning flesh wuz delicious. But more Fangirls still came, along with Gauron himself.
"HOW DARE U SIDE WITH MURAKI U NASTI PEDO?!11111" I said waving my Zanpaktou around. Gauron said: "Beacuse he would let me realize my dream of killing lotts of pple and finally raoping Souske! And possibly Kaname." Then he shot the Mansion with his Humongous Mecha!
PROTEGO BANKAI!" I said and the blast was blocked by a shield. Garun then replied: "Wehen ur reinforcements cum, meet me and Muraki at the Louvre." Then he drove away.
"Keep figthing my warriors!1" I said to the others who were killing lots of Fangits to defend the room. They cheered and gave me a toast. Then suddenly, I looked down the windoe again and I saw...that the Fangirls are bringing in.........Cannons like from World War I!
edited 13th May '11 9:37:58 PM by BadficFetish
The Fulltropal Alchemist
AND SUDDENLY, out of nowher, Super Ninja T-Rex Cyborgs crawled out from the ground! Tehy wer evrywhere!
My Brother, and only member of my Trope Nakama
((OOC: Gee, way to ruin the mood I just set up! Granted, I or Game Spazzer would have done it anyway, so no harm done.))
But they were on our side! It tuned out that the party guests had also hired several Supr Ninga T-Rex Cybors to come early just in case something like this happened. The Fangirs were surprised and were curbstomped early.
"To me, party guests! We shall battle for the fair city!" I roared. We ran out of the dining room and into the garage where there were Tanks and APC's and Mecha and Weaponized Cars and Spider Tanks. The Fangifts didn't touch them because they required passwords to drive. Nodame and Chiaki showed us to a Super APC they had. After we put on our seatbelts, they asked:
"So, are you going to the Louvre, like that Gauron guy said?"
"No not yet," I replyed. "We're going to press our offensive towards the Eifell Tower, hoping the the other Merecnaries we hired join us on the way there. We're going to kill every-"
Then suddenly, the air was filled with blasts as Aroplanes and Paratroopers came in, along with other Tanks, APC's and Mecha! Lots and lots of Badass Army Peole came in and began shooting and grenading and slicing and killing the enemy as they advanced.
"Aid has come!" I shooted. "The advantage is ours!"
Next Chapter: The Battle of Paris
edited 17th Dec '10 9:46:55 AM by BadficFetish
The Beta Male
(OOC: Welcome to the fic, Dark Kaiser, that is, assuming you're staying.
And now for THE CROSSOVER-FEST! Please be aware that for added realism, I don't know what two thirds of this stuff is, and therefore Did Not Do The Research. Enjoy!)
AN: i hav got sum rekwests frum revewers that i shud put thes chars in but I do not no hu they r. So I will just wing it.
We sowly fot our way to the eifill tower lik in a driveby shoting. Idningo who wasz in the car with me tok off her shirt and her size FF bar and lened out of the widnow. It waz very sexxah.
I was juts shoting things with the ninja cyborg trexz but then................
,OH NOES! REINFROSEMENTS ARIVED!" I sed badlym
Bcuz this waz draco in lethr panz convention fangirs showed up . ther we're gannondrof(An:katluvver23) and mello(Light River 105) and That doktor guy from Fringe(Becky21) and the elevator from The Devil(Becky21) and teh emo prince(Katara Teh Avatar 666). fangirz! And they we're ariving in helicopers that shot LAZORS! 1111111111!!!
Then they staretd shotting teh ninja cybrog t rexz!
NOOOOOOO" I sed bcuz i am a nice person.
Then indigo rubbed her bobs on me and i felt better becuz of her obobs.
Then indigo had an idea and she got out of our blak merecdez benz and shouted at teh jokr fangits "THE POWR OF BOBS COMPELZ U!" Bcuz angels gav her magical boob powers liek in Misfile. (AN: that was 4 u 0rangeR0setearz4564!) then they we're mind controld by her bobs sop they wer on our side!!
Then we began to shot ppl and the I had a god idea.
I razed my sord and sed "REDUCTO BANKAI! " I pointed it at teh ifeyl tower and it fell ofr! It also cruched the reinforsements on the way down!
Teh ppl of England, France chered and sed thank u for saving us for the lazor helicopter! Then thay gav us lots of wine and chese and baggets and sex. Anfter the sex we continued for the Louvre!
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
But first we repaired the Eiffel Tower because I and Indigo found it romantic and wanted to pledge our love there later. Also Arthur told us that we would be sued and Imprisoned if the people found out that we were the ones that desrtroyed the monument. I used a Reparo bankai to fix the structure.
When we got to the museum, there were still some Fangits waiting for us. This time, they did not just have sticks with nales on them, but also guns. We fought for a while but we exterminated them in the end. Then we went to the center, where the Mona Lisa and Muraki and Gauron were.
"Time for you to die, Kazukata Muraki!" I said angrily. I got out my sword and began to advance. But sudenly, clones of Chuck Norris and Mr T came out of the shadows! We were completely surrounded. Muraki spoke:
"Unless you plan to go up against so many Memetic Badass duplicates, you have three options. The first one is that you surrender and kill yourselves, completing the sacrifice. The second one is that you get killed by our troops, also completing the sacrifice. The third one is that you get captured while figthing, in which case you get raped and tortured before dying, which will complete the sacrifice in a very...interesting way."
"F- u! I have a Trope Gun!" and then I branideshed my Trope Gun before Muraki and Gauron.
"So do I. I managed to get some fragments of Charlot's soul before my temporary death." And then he took out a Trope gun too!
The Beta Male
(OOC: Since this already has so much Fourth Wall Breakage and TV Tropes crossovers, I figured this couldn't hurt....)
"Oh noez!" I sed bcuz Chuck Norris is made of asskiking. Then I staked almost all of my energy on Wat Was should help me win bucz my Trop Gun alon waz not enuf and so I started 2 chant . Arthur, becuz he was a fanfic outher, cot on 2 wat I was doing and sed
"Are you completely insane? Even if that did work, there is absolutely no way that would even help us! She can be pretty damn fickle, you know!"
I got mad and sed "DO U HAV ANY OTHER BETAR IDEAS!?!1"
arthir Sputterd and sed "That's not the point!"
i yelled u guyz ned 2 buy me Sum tiem!" i yelled as the Mr Tz and chuk norisss began 2 atak. Muraki just sat bak and let his mooks to teh fiting. Ten he laffed evollly
Arthur siyed but began 2 fite with glowy bursts of gren and wite energy. Indigo Shot mahic Fairy Tale spellz and also Stabbed thingz in teh ballz. the chuk noriss fot bak with roundhouse kiks and mrtz fot bak wit trying To Bust caps in our ases.! Wile my friend fot valiently and brave they we're begining 2 weaken under The Raw power of tHe Memetic Badasses. So i chamted harder!
Sum Joker fangirs Showed up but they we're just liek canon (lol geddit) fodder for teh 2 kinds of Awsome.
Then I finished chanting and Waitwd wit bated breth.
A light apperd a bit away frum my and grew briter! Ten it faded and standing inside was....................................................................................,,.........,.,......,.,........
Trope-tan!
AN: u r welcome.
MY SOUL IS DARK BUT MY HAIR IS COLORFUL — Brahian Pokémon Alchemist
"Even Haruhi Suzumiya would have been a less dangerous choice!" said Arthur who was now afrais for his life. Trope-Tan hated Mary Sues and Marty Stus and Badfic Authors and Trolls who write badfics on purpose (not that I'm 1 of dem!!!111111 lol). He and Indigo and Aryll and Samantha and Hei cowered and began preparing their lost will and testament.
"Oh, please." said Trope-Tan. "I'm not crass enough to take your lives immideately, not when I can just derail your next arc with spoilers." She then smirked.
"After Muraki gets defeated through the Deus ex Machina of Ebony descending from the ceiling and taking away Muraki's Trope Gun so that you can use yours without any interference, Soul Society agents will come in to arrest you for using Dark Arcanoi. There will then be an extended war arc in which you defeat every captian they send at you."
"However, Snapsui and Loopintake will turn out to be on your side, and it will be revealed that you've been replacing Soul Society's captains at the High Queen of Mary Sues' behest. Then, either Aizen or Muraki will reveal that you were originally Arthur's Spectre, which is why part of your soul can be used to create a Trope Gun."
"But Arthur's still alive!" I said.
"That's because he got ressurected using D&D Magic just after you got seperated from the rest of his soul. All magic systems are functioning in this verse, you know. Anyway, it turns out that if Arthur dies, you can fuse with his Psyche and the resulting energy can unlock the powers of Charlot's Twin, transferring them to you."
My eyes grue wide with surprise. So did Arthur's. "By the way, you might want to move to Ultramar. Not even Shinigami Stu here is willing to touch that place in his current untrained state." Trope-Tan said to the Fanfic Author. Then she dissappeared! So did Arthur!
Then, the ceiling broke as Enoby descnded from it, and snactched Muraki's Trope Gun! Now I can use my own without him interfering in my way.
edited 21st Dec '10 12:13:32 AM by BadficFetish
Quickly, I shot the Chuck Norris and Mr.T clones with Worf Effect and Badass Decay bullets while Ebony did the same to Muraki and Gauron. Then, battle music like from Kingdom Hearts Birth By Sleep began sounding! Indigo, Aryll, Samantha and Hei began to battle teh clones again like they had new stamina.
"Sectumsempra!" I said to Gaoru. A big cut began to appear on his body and blood oozed out of him and soaked me in a really Badass way. I laughed while Aryll drank some of the blood. Then I stabbed Muraki and shot bullets marked Macross Missile Massacre at him with my Trope Gum!
Muraki exploded. I took out the last of the clones with Trope Bullets marked Impaled with Extreme Prejudice, which got them impaled with huge spikes. Then, I spoke to the rest of my team:
"Trope-Tan has just revealed that our Designated Hero days are over. Already, the people of Soul Society are moving to preserve their lives and their livelihoods by gathering against us. In just a few days, every being of goodness not under the thrall of the High Queen of Mary Sues will turn against our party, focusing their considerable resources on one goal: To destroy us utterly!"
"But does this mean that we should just curl up and die like frightened insects awaiting the caretaker's boot? No, because suedom goes both ways! If we cannot be the greatest heroes in this verse, let us be the greatest villains! We have an army, we have our weapons, don't we also have the will to use them? Let the world quail at our footsteps!"
"Let the call of power course through your bodies. Let your minds be filled by toughts of greed and gain. If we stand together, if we do not allow ourselves to be beaten and broken like so many of our predecessors, we shall gain the wealth of galaxies when The Bad Guy Wins!"
"Yayyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!111111" shouted every1. There were speakers and microphones, so the Mercenaries heard them too. Immediately they began restocking their spent ammo and preparing for battle. There were Mad Scientists in the army and they immidiately began building a portal for the invasion.
Louvre Cieling
"Oh, Crap!." said Rukia. Soul Society had barely recovered from Aizen's takeover and brief invasion of Tokyo, and was unprepared for battle. Not merely that, but she had been listening when Trope-Tan told Aoshiro about the High Queen's initiative to replace all the captains with Sues and Stus.
This was dire news. But the ravages to canon had opened up opportunities that could help them stem the tide, even with the prospect of figthing one of the most vile Marty Stus ever to exist. A portal appeared behind her, and she jumped through it without a moment's hesitation.
She appeared in a command room where the greatest of the remaining Captains were gathered in anticipation. She spoke to the assembled figures:
"We need the alliance with Konoha. There are no doubts about it."
edited 27th Dec '10 6:46:03 AM by BadficFetish
AN: WARING: SUM OF DIS CHAPER IS EXTERMLY SCARRY. VWEIER EXCRETION IS ADVISD.
Ten Samantha and Hei mad out sum ore nd it ws rlly sxeh nd teb Aoshiro was lik why did ogron git kiled an y dont i hav ani on to makl outt wit? then glados showed up and said hello you follish folls i am gong 2 tak over teh wurld hahahahahaha!! ten i sayed y? ten galdas sayed becuz! nd ten seh bak stabed Aoshiro wif a nife and he died nd sayed wtf did u kil me i thoght i ws the main char? glads sayed hahahahah! nd ten Aoshiro died (AN: don't warry eh wil gte reserted sonn as ehs main char eh cant dei!!!!!!!) Tehn glados said tat ehr wruld damnation plan neded tem 2 kil somon nd if they didn't shed kil then tey askd who tey had 2 killl n she said you have to kil...................................Cloud strife!
AN: omg she kild Aoshiro! oh no! wil tey kil claude? wil Aoshiro come bak 2 lif (Of clourse eh wil he teh main char!)??? Fnd out nxt teim!
MM: Now I see why people write stuff like this. It's fun!
edited 26th Nov '10 9:10:19 PM by megamagikarp
Based on what?