Wrestling: Joey Ryan

Legalize Sleaze
On May 24th, 2012, for Impact Wrestling's second Gut Check Challenge, TNA introduced a young man with a Pornstache by the name of Joey Ryan. Joey, a brash, outspoken young man who looked for all the world like if Jon Lajoie was a 1970s porn star, was an experienced wrestler who had performed for many independent promotions. In his tryout match, he was defeated by Austin Aries. The next week, when it came time for the judges to make their decision on hiring Joey, Al Snow said yes, and Bruce Prichard and Taz gave a resounding no. To say Joey was unhappy with the decision would be a vast Understatement.

For the next several months, Joey Ryan would make his presence known on every Gut Check segment, heckling the judges and even tossing his drinks at them. Through his Youtube account, Joey would call out Taz for his shortsightedness and failure to recognize his talent, before turning his attention to Al Snow as well. Throughout all these promos, he'd refer to his supporters as "the 87%ers," based off a poll on TNA's website on whether Joey should get a contract. Finally, Al Snow called out Joey on the October 4th edition of Impact and suckered him into a match at Bound For Glory, with a TNA contract on the line. Joey won that match with the assistance of a sudden appearance of, and subsequent alliance with, Matt Morgan.

Joey Ryan has been wrestling for over a decade. In July of 2013, Joey was released from his TNA contract and became a free agent. He is one of the founding members of Pro Wrestling Guerilla, and is one half of its Tag Team Champions, the World's Cutest Tag Team (with Candice LeRae.


These tropes associated with Joey Ryan are brought to you by the 87%ers:

  • A Hero to His Hometown: He's from Hollywood California, so the Championship Wrestling From Hollywood crowds tend to give him a pass on a lot of things.
  • Artistic License Law
    • When he was accused of stealing the Championship Wrestling From Hollywood Television Title Belt, Ryan claimed that possession was 9/10ths of ownership. Needless to say, that wouldn't justify theft if Cintron had actually pressed charges.
    • Joey's other antics aside, he was correct at least in that he had the right to continue appearing on Championship Wrestling From Hollywood shows, provided they would actually take him back. Whatever legal action TNA could threaten, he should have been legally allowed to go where he pleased as an independent contractor, so long as he did so when nothing was scheduled on his contract.
  • Badass Mustache/Pornstache: Purposefully tailored to be sexy, or what he perceives as such.
  • Bait and Switch: He's defeated Nick Madrid. Now number one contender Willie Mack is set to defend against Tyler Cintron... and then Joey Ryan's music plays.
  • Breast Attack: Many of his intergender matches involve him using a move called the "Boobplex", where he hits his female opponent with a German suplex using her breasts as the handle; in turn, his tag team partner Candice LeRae has a variation she does involving male opponents' crotches, appropriately dubbed the "Ballsplex".
  • Carpet of Virility: With an impressive hairline going down to his belly button. Often seems to pour water or oil on himself for added effect.
  • Casanova Wannabe/Disco Dan: It was a lot more prominent on the Indys, but there are still whispers of it now. His most popular gimmick was a sleazy lecherous creep who acted like he was pulled right out of the 70s.
  • Counter Attack: Yeah, spreading your legs is natural when Irish whipping someone, but be careful that Joey doesn't instead slide through them while holding your arm and then give you a pump handle suplex!
  • Cool Shades: Especially as Joey Hollywood, with white rims.
  • Crowd Chant: Los Gallineros got "KFC", "Pollo Loco" and rooster calls.
  • Defeat Means Friendship: He and Candice started out feuding, with both scoring wins over the other but neither being able to finally end it. They eventually decided to just quit the feud and team up.
  • Early Installment Weirdness: Ryan used to have much shorter hair, a much thinner mustache, fingerless gloves, and be a much more serious competitor, to say nothing of El Gallinero.
  • Eccentric Mentor: Brian Kendrick, which makes more sense when you remember the Gallinero gimmick.
  • Hardcore: Subverted, at least in the this genre's sense as Joey is not a Garbage Wrestler. Rather, the Championship Wrestling From Hollywood commentators said "...he likes to get hardcore in his other line of work".
  • It's All About Me: Usually wants all attention on himself, however when he got it upon his return to Championship Wrestling From Hollywood in 2013, he ended up getting annoyed that everyone had so many questions for him.
  • Large Ham
  • Masked Luchador: He was El Gallinero #1.
  • Mistaken for Romance: A lot of people think that he and Candice are dating; they're not.
  • Perky Female Minion: Chase Walker was accompanied by Trisha LaFache in the Wrestling Retribution Project. Jade Chung as part of The Dynasty.
  • Pint Sized Power House: Can suplex, slam and toss men seventy pounds heavier than himself, although he often struggles through the effort.
  • Power Stable: The Embassy in Ring of Honor.
  • Power Trio
    • Los Gallineros, he being the first El Gallinero of the three.
    • X-Foundation in The Empire Wrestling Federation and Ultimate Pro with Scott Lost and 'Funky' Billy Kim.
  • Real Men Wear Pink: Pink knee pads with red and white trunks, really, it works!
  • Screw the Rules, I Have Connections!: How he was able to wrestle in Championship Wrestling From Hollywood while still employed by TNA, apparently. There were actually worries from Championship Wrestling From Florida officials that "That other company" might threaten them with legal action if they filmed him for their television program and told him no but Joey Ryan came back and butted his way into the main event anyway.
  • Shout-Out: During a Pro Wrestling Guerilla appearance, he surprised the audience with this impression of Andy Kaufman, of all people.
  • Small Name, Big Ego: The catalyst behind his 2012 campaign/feud.
  • Smug Snake: Joey Ryan is the best and most important wrestler with a TV tropes page! Not only was he the highest drawing PWG Champion of all time, not only was he a ratings bolster on television but he has his own verified twitter account!
  • Sore Loser: In 2009, after he failed to win the PWG World Championship from Chris Hero, who went on to surpass him in number of days he held the belt, meaning Joey Ryan was no longer the longest running Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Champion of all time.
  • Squash Match: When forced to wrestle his own tag team partner Matt Morgan, Joey didn't do so well. You could give him points for trying but he already guessed how it was going to go.
  • Start My Own: Tyler Cintron was the official Championship Wrestling From Hollywood International Television Champion, but since Ryan saw himself as the biggest television star in the company, on account of his TNA appearances, he brought out his own replica of the belt and called himself the true television champion.
  • Straw Misogynist: Implied prior to teaming with Candice LeRae ("Cry like the weak woman you are.") Well, sometimes it was implied, sometimes it was overtly apparent.
  • Trying to Catch Me Fighting Dirty: Some of his fans try to defend him with the argument "Everything's legal in porn".
  • Tag Team
    • That Seventies Team in Rev Pro, Guerilla and Wrestling Society X
    • The Real American Heroes with Karl Anderson in several promotions
    • With Tony Broadway in NWA Pro and Ring Ka King
    • Lucky Inc. (later The Happening) with Johnny Goodtime in NWA Pro and the Alternate Wrestling Show
    • The Dynasty with Scott Lost
    • The World's Cutest Tag Team with Candice LeRae
  • "The Reason You Suck" Speech: On his "Joey Ryan Has A Camera & A YouTube Account" series, Joey would deliver some long-winded ones, weekly, to Taz and Al Snow. This is just one such effort.
  • The Rival: Los Luchas to the Real American Heroes of the NWA World Tag Team Titles. Also, some team known as Los Crazy Chickens.
  • The Thing That Would Not Leave: Despite being denied by the Gutcheck judges, he didn't get the hint.
  • Tournament Arc: Joey Ryan defeated Chris Hero in the finals of the 2010 Battle Of Los Angeles.
  • Treacherous Advisor: One of Willie Mack's trainers and claimed to be his friend. All while striking him after the pretense of a handshake, punching him in the throat, kicking Mack in the groin while he wasn't looking, wrecking Willie's chance at the actual television title and being all around jackass in Championship Wresting From Hollywood.
  • Two Decades Behind: Times two!
  • Two First Names: His most common gimmick has them anyway.
  • Would Hit a Girl: Possibly tying into the Andy Kaufman impression above, he's wrestled a fair share on inter-gender matches on the independent circuit. It probably helps that he's only 5'9", meaning he doesn't tower over female wrestlers the way others might.
  • Wrestling Doesn't Pay: The commentators of Championship Wrestling From Hollywood implied he worked as a porn star when he wasn't wrestling (you don't say?).

"Who wants a mustache ride?!"