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Filth
SEX.

Now that we have your attention...

Porn is a staple for sitcom gags, as writers love coming up with punny names. Characters will watch Good Will Humping, Thighs Wide Slut, or Men in Back (if they accidentally buy gay porn). (Coincidentally, it's not unheard of for one of these "fictional" titles to actually turn out to be a real title of a real production.) There's often a shot of the protagonist staring at the television while cheesy music blares. If ever we see actual footage, it will be random shots of couples in such a preliminary stage of sexual intercourse that they're often still pretty much completely dressed.

Male sitcom characters often tell each other dirty jokes whose punch lines we never hear, because they are interrupted by the appearance of a lady. It is left to our filthy imagination. Alternately, we just hear the punch line, which is perfectly meaningless and innocent on its own. See Orphaned Punchline.

The iconic three-page fold-out is also a strong visual image used in many series. Turning the magazine to make sense of the image optional.

See also Innocent Innuendo, Home Porn Movie, Porn Stash, The Internet Is for Porn. Not to be confused with The Filth. Or the book Filth, from the author of Trainspotting.


Examples:

    open/close all folders 

    Anime 
  • Kakashi Hatake of Naruto is introduced reading Makeout Paradise... and continues to do so even while he kicks the collective ass of his future ninja team.
    • He puts away the book when he faces Sasuke, and when he does the test again with Naruto and Sakura after the timeskip (and even uses his Sharingan that time).
      • Incidentally, in this last instance, Naruto comes up with a way to pass the training handily: rush Kakashi and tell him spoilers of the latest Makeout Paradise album! He has to not only cover his ears, but also close his eyes since the Sharingan allows him to read lips more easily.
    • Naruto's other mentor, Jiraiya, writes the series. He occasionally takes breaks from training to "research" the next volume.

    Film 
  • The "listing of fictitious typical porn titles" joke is used in the farce No Sex Please, We're British.
  • The scene from Clerks in which Randall orders new movies for the video store is a phenomenal example of how colorful fictional porn titles can get.
  • This bit of dialogue from the Marx Brothers play Animal Crackers, preceding Captain Spaulding's big speech, was probably removed from the movie even before it was edited after release to comply with the Production Code:
    (Spaulding and Mrs. Rittenhouse enter.)
    Spaulding: So there was only one bedroom in the farm house and the farmer had three daughters and only one traveling salesman...
    Mrs. Rittenhouse: Captain Spaulding, what kind of a story do you call that?
  • Kiss Kiss Bang Bang features an old film, in the box of a porn film called "Lord of the Cock Rings".
  • Sticking(!) with Robert Downey Junior, an unheard joke in the 2009 Sherlock Holmes film ends with 'So the barman says, 'May I push in your stool?'.
  • In Dirty Work, Mitch and Sam get revenge on the manager of a movie theatre by swapping the films for suspiciously similar porn movies when his supervisors are doing their inspection; films like "Men in Black... Who Have Sex With Each Other."
  • In Osmosis Jones, the title character, a white blood cell, is reading an issue of DNA Monthly, admiring a centerfold of a double-helix molecule.
    Nice genes. You've got the chromosomes in all the right places.
  • A subtle example from Beauty and the Beast: As Gaston flips Belle's book on its side, Word of God has it that he's looking for a centerfold.

    Literature 
  • A porn film was an important piece of evidence in Ben Elton's Dead Famous. Rather than going for a punny title, Elton named it "Fuck Orgy Eleven".
  • In Neuropath, Samantha is highly amused by the title "Weapons of Ass Destruction". And then proceeds to act out another porn film with Tom.

    Live action TV 
  • In All in the Family, Edith read an issue of Playgirl in a hospital that Archie handed her unknowingly.
  • On Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Quark seems to be a proponent of the "Vulcan Love Slave" series of holosuite entertainments.
  • Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere, has Charlie's Anals and Willy Wanker and the Chocolate Factory.
  • Friends: "Buffay the Vampire Layer" starring Phoebe Buffay. Actually her sister
    • "The One With The Free Porn". Nuff said.
    • Ross and Chandler fought over authorship of a dirty joke submitted to Playboy, which the audience never gets to hear.
      • Apparently, it's offensive to women, doctors and monkeys.
  • On Happy Days, we hear half of a joke about sailors and a nurse in the shower in a letter from Richie to Fonzie.
  • Mash:
    Colonel Potter: "Then she said, 'You must be the Boy Scout, because you're the one who...'"
    (Father Mulcahy appears)
    Potter: "...'who, uh, uh... helped me across the street.'"
    • Similarly when Colonel Potter is in the communal shower singing about swimmin' with bow-legged women ("and swim between their legs!") when Father Mulcahy walks in.
  • Wings:
    Brian: "And then the hooker said to the gynecologist, 'My hourly rates might be higher, but...'"
    Fay appears
    Brian: "'...but that's the way it goes!' Hahaha."
    Fay: "Hmm, it was much funnier the way I heard it."
  • On one episode of The Carol Burnett Show, they parody The Hunchback of Notre Dame. A recurring gag involves the repetition of the first two lines of a poem which is never completed: "There once was a girl from Paris / Who danced all night until three...."
  • Limerick variant: a character on The Golden Girls mispronounces Blanche's last name, Devereaux, as if it rhymed with "bucks." Dorothy corrects him that it's only pronounced Deverucks in limericks.
    • Also a cake-based version, when Rose unwittingly buys a welcome cake from the Erotic Bake Shop.
      Rose: "I thought it was in the shape of Florida."
  • An episode of Blackadder, had a classic take on the "blackmail photograph"— Blackadder puts a drugged noble in a compromising position in front of the "fastest painter in Europe". The resulting picture is never seen but is implied to be quite... exotic. To say nothing of the fact that the other person in the painting was a coerced Percy in drag.
    • Said noble is "The Baby-Eating Bishop of Bath and Wells", a self-confessed "Colossal Pervert": "Animal, Vegetable or Mineral I'll do anything to anything!"
  • An episode of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation had Jim Brass talking to various people staying on the same hotel floor as a murder. One man justified his precise recall of the time he heard something suspicious with the following:
    Man: I was watching a pay-per-view movie.
    Brass: Yeah? Which movie?
    Man: Armagetiton.
    Brass: You mean Armageddon.
    Man: No. Arma-Get-It-On.
    Brass: Was it any good?
    Man: (shrugs) Worked for me.
  • In Mad Men, the men from the agency are discussing a Volkswagen advert. After a while, one of them comments that they've spent fifteen minutes discussing the ad and not the rest of the magazine- Playboy.
  • Happens a couple times in Firefly. In one instance, Simon and River sit down at the dinner table just in time to hear Mal delivering the punchline, "So then the Shepherd says to the Companion, "Well, a good goat'll do that.""
  • Even Home Improvement got into the act in later years, which only made sense, with three mid-to-late teenaged sons. One of their titles included "Shakespeare In Lust".
  • To list the number of times this happens on Coupling would have us here for hours, so here are four of the most pertinent examples:
    • Susan finds one of Steve's porn tapes — "Lesbian Spank Inferno" — which leads to a falling out between the two and results in Steve having to describe the plot of the movie in a way that makes it sound classy. In the middle of a dinner party attended by all their friends.
    • Patrick is revealed to have videotaped every sexual encounter he's had, including those with his ex, Susan, which leads to Steve getting angry when he finds about its existence and Susan getting angry when she finds out she's been taped over.
    • Patrick finds out his ex-girlfriend used him as the "primary model" for a sex toy company.
    • Jane decides to do the "wearing only a trenchcoat" thing with her new boyfriend... only to find he's holding a dinner party the night she tries it. She ends up spending the rest of the evening trying to get a dress without leaving the bathroom.
  • The Steve Harvey Show mentions "Saving Ryan's Privates" and "Legs Wide Shut".
  • Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps has erotic literature including Lust of the Mohicans, MacBiff and The Count of Monte Cristo - except it's not 'count'.
  • In an episode of Head of the Class Darlene blackmailed Arvin by threatening to expose a VHS rental of his: "Buns of The Magnificent Seven."
  • In a scene from Married... with Children, Al and Peggy visit a video store for a movie they can watch together. Not surprisingly, Peggy's suggestions consist entirely of Chick Flicks, while Al's preferences are such titles as Schindler's Lust and Mrs. Assfire.
  • The plot of one Privileged episode revolves around Rose buying The Bone Identity in order to learn a few tricks for a (presumed) sex date. The impression Rose gets is that great sex involves bending over backwards for your guy. Literally.
  • Roseanne gives us the classic "Romancing the Bone."
  • The Tony Randall Show had an episode in which the main character, a judge, was reviewing a film titled Snow White and the Eight Dwarves to determine if it was obscene. He wasn't particularly interested in the movie, but every other man who entered his office was entranced.
    Judge Franklin: Well, I don't think this is obscene ... eight little men chasing a beautiful girl around a jacuzzi.
    Court Reporter: Wait till they catch her.
    (About ten seconds pass, while another fellow comes into the room.)
    New guy: They caught her.
  • Queer as Folk had Emmett sitting Mike down in front of the TV with a remote control and a new video called Schindler's Fist. Michael was only mildly amused.
  • The badly edited low-budget porn movie that Joan's subletter makes in her apartment (very much without Joan's consent) in an episode of Elementary. The audience knows nothing about the "plot" or particular kinks, except that they used Joan's spatula as a prop.
  • Only Fools and Horses:
    • There's a entire bunch of gags on Sexual Roleplay in one of the Christmas Special episodes.
    • "Danger UXD" revolves around blow-up dolls which have a tendency to blow up as they've been filled with propane instead of air.

    Music 

    Professional wrestling 
  • Val Venis, the WWF's wrestling porn star, was celebrated for his film career, at least by the commentators of Sunday Night Heat, Al Snow and Johnathan Coachman.
  • While there is little to indicate Kenny King has done anything more explicit than some erotic dancing, Eric Young would have you believe the things he's done are too disgusting even for late night television (TNA)

    Stand up comedy 
  • Margaret Cho talks about this a couple times. Her parents own a bookstore, and one of her most famous routines is describing her mother sorting through the gay porn ("Margaret, what is...Assmaster?"). Her short-lived sitcom touched on this as well, with her mom dropping a Free Your Willies movie in disgust. In Notorious CHO, she also talks about how her boyfriend was ridiculously late returning a porn movie which she had to take back herself, leaving the video store clerks to think she's addicted to masturbating.

    Theatre 
  • Older Than Steam at the very least, as not even William Shakespeare was above Double Entendres and dirty jokes to amuse the "groundlings" (like the old drunken doorkeeper in Macbeth, who expounds upon the cruel irony of alcohol making men impotent and lustful at the same time). Granted you have to be a student of early modern English to get most of his jokes.
    • Some scenes are almost solid allusions. Now, the Elizabethans had more ways of referring to female genitalia than to male, which is to say a lot more than we do because the Victorian age hadn't happened yet, but this was an era of coarse jokes in mixed company even in high society, and also the heyday of the pun — playing on words was the heart of wit, and people were pretty good at it, to "torture one poor word ten thousand ways."
    • By the way, wit was a euphemism for penis.

    Video games 
  • A weapon in the Metal Gear Solid games. Leave the "magazine", "book", or in MGS4, "Playboy" open on a flat surface, and watch as the guards are unable to look away from it.
    • Well, the guards can't, but... Major Raikov can. Poor guy. One imagines that after Volgin, everything else must be rather unimpressive.
  • In Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, the Gayborhood has a porn theater and on the marquee is the rather unimaginitive Wizard of Ass.
  • Final Fantasy IV included a Developer's Room Easter Egg item that was basically a porno magazine. It goes by names such as "Smut" and "Lustful Lali-ho" and was originally cut out of the original North American SNES release but restored in later remakes.
  • From The Elder Scrolls, The Lusty Argonian Maid.
    • And other stories which reappeared from Daggerfall to Oblivion. The heavy armor book was a bard's tale about a man more agile and skilled in full plate than without, and ended on an allusion to how he was more able to satisfy his wife fresh from a tournament than he was before.
  • Bungie has long promised a Sid Meierís Pirates! type of game called "Pimps of the Sea." It was eventually used as the code name for Halo 3.
  • Some of the random junk laying around in Borderlands is Girls & Guns type magazines... Grunt and Gun-Ho 'Girls Gone Commando!' and 'Full Metal Corset' being the cover stories respectively, and Heavy Fire having 'Bigger is Better' and '300 pounds of oomph!'
  • Kingdoms of Amalur: Reckoning has a quest called "Long Overdue" where the Fateless One has to find the 10 missing books in the late Brother Til's collection of lewd literature. The player can read the books, only to find that they are very tame by modern western standards.

    Web comics 
  • In College Roomies from Hell!!!, April goes to a video store to rent a film which she and the others had (accidentally) been in, only to find a very different film with the three main male characters in it. It transpires that at some point during their drunken 'misery journey' (which was also responsible for their mutations and led to their being arrested by a mysterious government agency), the three of them took part in a soft core porn shoot. A later story arc involved them trying to track down where this happened, with the result that Mike nearly got forced into doing another porno, this time with April (whom they had dressed in a seifuku (schoolgirl uniform), to go with Mike's left 'arm').
  • Questionable Content is full of porn, from Marigold's Magical Love Gentlemen yaoi anime to Pintsize's hair-raising porn collection. Given that Pintsize is, essentially, a robot, this becomes even more peculiar...
    • A robot that is also used as Marten's computer.
  • Problem Sleuth prominently features Hunk Rump, which is Exactly What It Says on the Tin. Gay porn in general turns up quite often in MS Paint Adventures. But not so much in Homestuck, probably because the main characters are 13-year-olds. Nevertheless, the Midnight Crew has their fair share of filth in the intermission.
    • Dave's brother is the founder of Plush Rumps, a website devoted to puppet pornography.
  • Lyle the stuffed tiger from Achewood has a taste for pornography titles that lie somewhere between unambiguous and totally nonsensical. He has been spotted with the magazine Completely Ruined Junk #28 in his back pocket. (His rationale for buying print smut is, "Think about it. The power goes out, who holds all the cards?") He buys imported Japanese porn games such as Urine Cop. Most memorably, he once left a porn DVD queued up on the TV called Breast Attack on Fuck Mountain.
  • In El Goonish Shive, Nanase and Ellen search for a movie to rent. Ellen's second choice is a "jungle movie" which is "Rated 'R' for Language, Violence and Frequent and Gratuitous Loincloth Removal."

     Web original  
  • True Porn Clerk Stories was a blog by a woman who worked in a video rental shop. Being a small, independent shop (and not, say, Blockbuster) a very large segment of their business was in porn. Some of the customers were rather colorful.

     Western animation  
  • Even classic Looney Tunes cartoons pull this — in at least two cartoons Bugs Bunny "switches reels" to show clips of his choosing and accidentally starts showing a "stag film" instead (of which we only see the title screen reading "Stag Reel" with a picture of...an actual stag, as in male deer).
  • Futurama had the running gag of robot porn. Which turned out to be nothing but circuit diagrams.
    • And then there's also Robot Strippers, which don't wear cases. (Think along the same lines as the case on your computer)
      • The fourth movie even had explicit robot sex, which consisted of a data disc being transfered from the male robot to the female.
      • In the episode which spoofs college movies, the robots of Robot House peek in the window of a sorority house, and look past the scantily clad women to the desktop computer, which gets "spanked" and has it's case taken off.
    • In one episode, and educational video segues into a porno "now that we've solved the garbage crisis, doctor, perhaps you can help me with my sexual inhibitions" "With gusto." (Because the video was on the Internet and in the future, just as today, The Internet Is for Porn.)
    • Also when Fry buys a TV from the 20th century other characters comment on the low resolution, Amy mentioning that in one of those things her obscene tattoo couldn't be seen. The others giggle when she shows it, but we are unable to distinguish it.
  • Related thematically at least is Rattrap offering to take Silverbolt to a bar where "the serving bots are walking around minus their torso plates, ya know what I mean?"
  • Another South Park episode revolved around a fictional porno called Backdoor Sluts 9.
    • In "Make Love Not Warcraft," Clyde is distracted by a three-page centerfold.
  • In the animated series of the same name, Duckman is universally infamous for the amount of disgusting bottom-dredged porn he owns.

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