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Talk About the Weather
Yes, even aliens on official communications channels talk about the weather.

Let us compromise
(Our hearts are not of leather):
Let us shut our eyes,
And talk about the weather.

The ultimate in inconsequential, neutral talk: the subject matter is the weather. Usually fictionally to evade a more serious topic – out of dislike for it, especially the Elephant in the Living Room, or because they might be overheard – or to depict characters as not knowing each other, or having nothing to say. May indicate a Ban on Politics. Those who Cannot Spit It Out often talk about the weather instead.

The character who Hates Small Talk will react vehemently.

Its Truth in Television nature keeps it alive. Characters can easily refer to the trope without breaking the fourth wall.

Talking about the weather can turn deadly serious if the characters are meteorologists, pilots, sailors, trapped outdoors, or in a disaster movie with a weather theme. Parodies of this trope in such a context are common, but not prevalent.

See also Seinfeldian Conversation.

Examples

    open/close all folders 

    Film 
  • Cinderella Man
    Jim Braddock: Joe, did you come all this way just to talk about the weather?
  • Trail of Kit Carson
    Bill Harmon: Take your time, Mr. Benton. There's been a lot of weather for your daughter and me to talk about.
  • Groundhog Day: Mrs. Lancaster tries to make small talk with Phil by talking about the weather — unfortunately, he's pissed off and he's a weatherman.
    Mrs. Lancaster: There's talk of a blizzard.
    Phil Connors: We may catch a break and that blizzard's gonna blow right by us. All of this moisture coming up out of the south by midday is probably gonna push on to the east of us and at high altitudes it's gonna crystallize and probably give us what we call snow. Probably will be some accumulation but here in Punxsutawney our high is gonna get up to about 30 today, teens tonight. Chance of precipitation about 20% today, 20% tomorrow. Did you want to talk about the weather or were you just making chitchat?
  • Used in The Naked Jungle. After several minutes of very awkward, one-sided conversation, there is a prolonged silence and then:
    Joanna: "Everything I say seems to make things worse. I'm trying not to irritate you."
    Leiningen: "I noticed that. I find it irritating."
  • Used in the film version of Sense and Sensibility, when Mrs Dashwood brusquely orders Margaret to "restrict her remarks to the weather".

    Fan Works 

  • In Twillight Sparkle's awesome adventure, at one point Admiral Awesome finds the President of Amarican in his tent. His opening line: “Hello Mr. President. Beautiful weather isn’t it?”

    Literature 
  • In Diana Wynne Jones's Castle in the Air, one princess complains that a disadvantage of the castle is you can't talk about the weather.
  • In The Mouse That Roared, the Grand Duchess discovers she can't even talk about the weather, since different parts of the duchy want different weather.
  • Harry Potter
    • In Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, whenever Quirell is questioned on the subject of his turban, he goes pink and starts talking about the weather. Hagrid also does this whenever touchy subjects are evoked, when he doesn't go mysteriously deaf.
    • In Order of the Phoenix, Harry is dismayed to find himself talking about the weather while trying to flirt with Cho.
  • In The Last Knight, Fisk comments that different classes of people have different kinds of small talk—nobles talk about horses, townsfolk talk about taxes, and farmers talk about the weather.
  • In Spider Robinson's Stardance, when Charlie Armstead asked how Raoul Brindle had managed to see the previously unreleased videos of the Stardance, rather than tell the truth or flat-out lie, Raoul answered, "Large weather we're having."
  • Dave Barry likes to use "We had some rain today, but it turned to sleet" as an unfunny line which gets inexplicable laughs.
  • In Maskerade at a dinner at the Opera House the diners talk about the cold weather to try and counteract the effects of Nanny Ogg's aphrodisiac chocolate pudding.
    Mr Salzella: Wind, glaciers, icicles -
    Mr Bucket: Not icicles!
  • Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility: Marianne complains about being expected to make small talk.
    I have erred against every common-place notion of decorum; I have been open and sincere where I ought to have been reserved, spiritless, dull, and deceitful — had I talked only of the weather and the roads, and had I spoken only once in ten minutes, this reproach would have been spared.
  • In Jasper Fforde's Lost In A Good Book, the spectators at the trial in The Trial talk about the weather as well as about her case.
  • In Moose County in Lilian Jackson Braun's The Cat Who series, it is generally customary to spend a minute or two talking about the weather before moving on to more serious subjects. This is just considered simple politeness, even with two people who know each other quite well.
  • In Rick Riordan's The Throne of Fire, with Sadie and Walt in the desert, she starts the conversation with "Lovely weather."
  • In P. G. Wodehouse's Hot Water Blair Eggleston's timidity with women is such that face with an incense-filled studio holding a scantily clad princess lolling on a tiger skin, he would take the seat nearest the door and talk about the weather.
  • In Poul Anderson's "Time Patrol", Manse observes that talking about crops and weather in Dark Ages England is much like twentieth century Middle Western America.
  • In Wen Spencer's Tinker, Nathan says that a first date, if not spent learning about each other, has small talk. Tinker mentions the heat.
  • In an editorial for the Hartford Courant, Mark Twain wrote, "Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it."
  • In the Sherlock Holmes story "The Adventure of the Six Napoleons", Lestrade is at first reluctant to tell what's really on his mind, so he resorts to this.
    On this particular evening Lestrade had spoken of the weather and the newspapers. Then he had fallen silent, puffing thoughtfully at his cigar
  • In Jasper Fforde's The Last Dragonslayer, Jennifer mentions this among the things the wizards could have talked about on the way to the job, but didn't.
  • In Robin McKinley's Sunshine, the person Sunshine comes the nearest to confiding the truth in is Yolanda, because when she talks about the weather or other chitchat, she not only doesn't ask what happened to her, but doesn't even seem to be suppressing the desire to.
  • In Hilari Bell's Knight and Rogue Series novel The Last Knight, Sir Michael and the lady talk about horses — which, the narrator notes, is what nobles do when farmers would talk about the weather, and townsmen taxes.
  • In Seanan McGuire's October Daye novel Ashes of Honor, when Tybalt insists on speaking with Toby alone, she starts with "Nice weather we've been having lately.''
  • In Dorothy Gilman's The Clairvoyant Countess, Mr. Faber-Jones learns his doctor has a heroic past and is struck by how, at his exam, the doctor will talk about the weather and gallbladders.
  • In Stephanie Burgis's A Most Improper Magick, Angeline complains that she can not understand Sir Neville and Mr. Gregson's talk. Must she and her sisters talk about the weather?
  • In Michael Flynn's The January Dancer, the Fudir calls Hugh his ticket out of there with as much emotion as if he were talking of the weather.

     Live Action TV  
  • In Frasier episode "Boo!", Martin has had a heart attack and doesn't want Ronee to know. Ronee lampshades that she Hates Small Talk with her elderly mother - which prompts Martin to engage in it himself, trying to avoid the subject of his "cardiac event".
    Martin: No. So, uh, good weather over there in Spokane?
    Ronee: God, no. It rained the entire time. I basically just sat there and made boring small talk with my mother. God, I hate small talk.
    (awkward pause)
    Martin: Oh, tell me. Rained here some, too.
    This continues for some time til Ronee figures out something's wrong.
  • Lampshaded on Gilmore Girls after an awkward post-breakup conversation:
    Lorelai: Yeah, it was just awkward, and neither of us knew how to act.
    Sookie: I'm sure it seemed worse than it really was.
    Lorelai: Uh, no. We hit the weather in the first minute.
    Sookie: Well, it has been unseasonably warm...
  • Babylon 5: Used as a code for a much more serious matter in "Z'ha'dum":
    Sheridan: Good. And when I see you next, if everything is set ... we'll talk about the weather.
  • In The Young Ones, Vyvyan resorts to this trope when he borrows yet another cup of sugar from the same neighbor he's been borrowing them from all morning.
    Vyvyan: Well, if you like snow and being really cold, it's a nice day.
  • In Monty Python's Flying Circus, Terry Jones' housewife is trying to keep Michael Palin's 'Poet Inspector' from leaving the house and makes a comment about it being a nice day. Palin replies with a detailed weather forecast, even flipping down a weather chart from the wall.

    Music 
  • Great Big Sea's "How Did We Get From Saying I Love You" is about two people whose relationship has devolved into awkward pauses and discussions about the weather.
  • REM's "Pop Song 89", a song mocking pop music's banality, has the following chorus: Should we talk about the weather?/Should we talk about the government?
  • Randy Travis' "Forever and Ever Amen" has as part of the chorus: "As long as old men sit and talk about the weather/As long as old women sit and talk about old men."
  • Erasure's "Chains Of Love" bemoans the loss of this as people became more impersonal in general:
    Do you remember? There was a time
    When people on the street were walking hand in hand in hand
    We used to talk about the weather, making plans together, days would last forever
  • Tears For Fears's "Head Over Heels".
    I wanted to be with you alone
    And talk about the weather
  • In a Casting Crowns song, the singer speaks of "talkin' bout the rain" instead of witnessing to his friend, which he knows he should be doing.
  • "So Much to Say" by Dave Matthews Band, describing suppressing emotional depth under meaningless smalltalk.
    Keep it locked up inside, don't talk about it
    Talk about the weathe-e-e-e-errrrr.
  • Built to Spill's "The Weather" has a more romantic take on the idea.
    And the wind and snow and the rain that blows
    None of those would matter much without you...
    And as long as I'm talking with you
    Talk of the weather will do.

    Newspaper Comics 
  • Dilbert: Dogbert teaching social skills to engineers. After going over the rules ("Loud, Simple, Smiley"):
    Wally: HEY, HOW ABOUT THAT LOW-PRESSURE SYSTEM, HUH?
    Dogbert: Good, but this time just say "weather".
  • In Prickly City, when Carmen is upset about having told Blatant Lies, and Winslow doesn't want to talk about it.

    Opera 

    Theater 
  • My Fair Lady: When Eliza went to Ascot, Professor Higgins instructed her to stick to the weather as one of her topics of discussion. The vocal exercises Higgins gives her just happen to be about the weather - which makes for some awkward moments with the Ascot crowd, but that's by far the least awkward part of the particular conversation. Freddie even compliments her on being so 'awfully clever', particularly when Higgins explains it away as 'the new small talk'.
  • The Arcadians: Two love birds get very close to declaring their feelings for one another when a crowd of strangers comes along. Of course, one cannot discuss emotions in public, so they are forced to discuss the 'Charming Weather'. Twice.
  • In Carousel, Julie and Carrie, friends as young women, are meeting again for some gossip. Carrie is in the middle of telling a racy story about something she saw while on a visit to Paris — but then Julie's own daughter enters the room, causing Carrie to invoke this Trope mid-sentence:
    Carrie: And the chorus girl had her legs up on the chair and...[Julie's daughter enters]...and it rained all day.
  • Jack in The Importance of Being Earnest tries this and is promptly called on it.
  • Oscar derides Felix in The Odd Couple for contributing only a weather report to a conversation.

     Video Games  
  • You can overhear several conversations in Batman: Arkham City about the weather. Considering its the middle of a snowstorm in a Gotham winter, and the speakers are typically pulling outdoor guard duty, it fits.
  • In Rune Factory 3, the first time that you greet a character each day often brings about a comment about the weather, which varies depending on the person you're talking to and how the weather affects their day-to-day activities and work.

    Visual Novels  
  • In Little Busters!, Haruka and Rin end up doing this in one scene because Haruka feels awkward around Rin since she's so noisy and Rin isn't very good with people she doesn't know very well.
  • In Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney Justice For All, Dr. Grey's Hair-Trigger Temper is apparently set off by inaccurate weather predictions, so Phoenix decides not to talk about the weather with him.

     Web Comics  

     Western Animation  
  • Voltron: Defender of the Universe: My Brother Is a Robeast
    Pidge: I don't know what to talk about, how 'bout sports or the weather?
  • The Fairly OddParents: Abra Catastrophe!
    Cosmo: I'm terrible at small talk! Ask me about the weather!
    Timmy: Uh, How's the Weather?
    Cosmo: Jeff! [shakes Timmy violently] See what I mean?!
  • In their first meeting in Hey Arnold!, this is how child psychologist Dr. Bliss lures Helga into talking to her.
    Dr. Bliss: "We can keep it light. We can talk about the weather or sports, or your classmates. We can talk about... Arnold."
    Helga: "ARNOLD!"
  • Phineas and Ferb managed to take even this trope up to eleven. When the boys are hit by Doof's Dull-And-Boring-Inator in "Phineas and Ferb Interrupted", Phineas goes on a minute long spiel about yes, how the weather is nice, although barometric readings would suggest otherwise. Did you know barometers have two scales? Of course, now you can simply look up the weather on the internet, but then you wouldn't be able to calculate where the sun is in the meridian and...

     Real Life 
  • Real life actually tends to subvert this during heat waves, torrential downpours, large hail, etc. when the weather actually becomes a very relevant and pressing topic.
  • Depending on the time of the year, the weather truly can be the primary topic of conversation in a certain area. For instance, in the Tornado Alley region of the United States, the possibility or occurrence of tornadoes and other violent storms during the late spring-early summer months often dominates the daily lives of almost everyone in the Midwest and Deep South. The same can also apply during hurricane season, but on an even larger scale.
  • Some British folk are a permanent example of this. Many foreign and native observers have tried to rationalise their apparent obsession with the weather. It's true that that Britain itself is in a temperate climate with an active gulf stream leading to very changeable weather, but there's also a general preference not to discuss personal matters or controversial ones ("politics, religion or The Great Pumpkin") with strangers, which doesn't leave you with many options.
    • Basically when a British person complains about the weather, it's their way of stating either "I want to talk to you", or "I don't want to talk to you, but I have no choice."
    • Also the defacto icebreaker in Brittany, the region of France South of Britain. For similar reasons: the weather tends to change three times a day, so it's really something worth keeping track of.
  • The first essay in David Foster Wallace's A Supposedly Fun Thing Ill Never Do Again tells much of the man's life story by relating it back to the horrible wind where he grew up. It's often a circuitous sort of connection, but he manages somehow.
  • In Japan, it's customary that, if you have an important matter to discuss with a boss or co-worker, one should first talk about something trivial before going into more serious matters. Weather is often the topic.
  • A persistent stereotype about Winnepeg, Manitoba is that two Winnepeggers, no matter where in the world they meet, or how long it's been since either has been back home, will inevitably ask one another what the weather was like in Manitoba when they leftnote .
  • On the Internet, complaining about the weather in your area will most likely turn into Misery Poker, with others from regions of worse weather chastising you for complaining about weather they consider everyday or paradise compared to what they have to deal with.
  • In Minnesota, the climate is bizarre enough that every season on the calendar can occur within days of each othernote . As such, weather is a common topic.

Spring Is LateWeather and EnvironmentThat Cloud Looks Like
Taking the BulletUndead Horse TropeTempting Fate
T-Word EuphemismDialogueTalking through Technique

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