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Avatar: The Last Airbender / Legend of Korra
- All of The Worst Foursome Ever. In order to have a baby that looks just like the two of them, Azula and Ty Lee ask Zuko to knock Ty Lee up. With Mai, Azula, and Mai and Zuko's baby present. Hilarity Ensues.
Azula: You're doing it wrong, Zuzu.Zuko: I am NOT doing it wrong!
- The first two lines:
- Serious Business deals with Korra using the Avatar State to ask Aang about dating advice. Highlights include:
- Aang's comment about the spirit world being rather boring for the previous Avatars.
- Tenzin's apparent lack of tact when wooing Pema; apparently, he shouted his love poems to her when she was passing by.
- "Do you want a cup of tea to go with your senseless violence?" "Yes."
- Aang's horror when Korra asks how Katara would woo someone like Zuko.
- The last line. Mentioning it would spoil the punchline.
- This exchange from Two No More:
Toph: Oh, stop worrying, Grumpy. We're just going to have some fun. I know that's a difficult concept for you...F-U-N.Zuko: Uh, okay, but Mai and I do have fun.Toph: I'm talking about outside the bedroom, Grumps.Zuko: We do it outside the bedroom. (realizes what he said, clamps a hand over his mouth and blushes)Toph: That's too much information.Zuko: I, uh, have a meeting to go to. *hurries out of the room*
- From Chasing The Dragon, while trying to convince Azula to testify at Ozai's trial, she and Zuko engage in sibling bickering.
Azula: I sometimes wonder; did mother ever have an affair with a flying lemur? Because I have no idea how I have such a half-wit for a brother!Zuko: At least I'm not insane.Azula: At least I'm not the one asking advice from a crazy person.Zuko: At least I have people who care about me.Azula: At least I'm not stupid, ugly, AND fat.Zuko: I'm not fat. And besides, I look just like you, so who's the stupid one now?Azula: Let me ask the voices in my head. Oh my, it's unanimous. First thing they've agreed on all year. You are! You're the stupid one!Zuko: You're insane!Azula: I know I am but what are you? Oh, that's right. Stupid. Fat. Ugly.Zuko: At least people still like me. You may be smart and pretty but you have nobody!Azula: Because you stole them all!Zuko: So what does that say about you?
Dr. Du Yi: (loudly and slowly) Do...you...know...where...you...are...right...now?Azula: (blank expression, imitating him) Yes. In...the...office...of...a...buffoon.He crossed out unresponsive.
- Azula sassing her doctor at the mental ward, who at first thinks she is unresponsive.
- One chapter of the fic Like Father, Like Daughter has Azula requesting a Royal Harem for herself from Ozai. Their conversation and Ozai's thoughts on the matter are funny enough, but the last few lines are absolutely hilarious.
Ozai: So...you want seven, group-willing, submissive men from the Fire Nation, preferably non-benders and of high-class descent?Azula: Yes, sounds about right. (Beat) Wait. Did you say men?Ozai: Of course...Azula: I want women.Ozai's brain just about exploded.
Azula: You're the one who sired me. It's your fault that I'm here.Ozai: Well, then apologies for my seed being successful.Ozai: Seriously, Azula. We could break out of here. Father and daughter. Phoenix King and Fire Lord.Azula: I believe someone melted your chicken helmet for some copper pieces.Ozai: Chicken helmet?!
- In a later chapter, Azula and Ozai are imprisoned together sometime after Sozin's Comet, and we get these lines:
- The +100 chapter short story collection The Ember Island Lighthouse has several:
Young!Azula: Let's play [the game] where we shove Zuko to the ground! But you girls have to pay attention so that you learn properly.Young!Ty Lee: (excitedly hopping up and down) YAY I'M GONNA BE SMART!Azula and Mai traded glances, but held their tongues.
- In chapter 8, Zuko and Iroh talk about Zuko getting together with Mai, and at the very end, Iroh casually says, "You and the waterbender would have made handsome babies, though." It makes Zuko drop his teacup in surprise.
- At the end of chapter 18, when it's revealed what Zuko was complaining about all chapter: Sokka convinced Iroh to make a giant cup of tea, Iroh fell in, and Zuko jumped in fully robed to save him.
- Chapter 27 has Zuko thinking about all the girls he has kissed. His descriptions of what it was like with Mai and Toph are detailed and romantic, but he only has one thought about the last girl: 'Katara tasted like fish.'
- Chapter 48: "Oh, glorious Agni in the sky above forbid I'm not in the exact right spot going into the fourth hour of this rehearsal!"
- The entirety of Chapter 64, in which Azula, Ty Lee, and Mai tell a round-robin story at their sleepover. Their clashing personalities and storytelling styles are what makes it hilarious.
- These lines from Chapter 78:
Young!Ozai: (after they're spotted) Tactical retreat, Zhao. Tactical retreat. Negative jing at its finest.
- Chapter 84: A teenaged Ozai, upon learning he's engaged to Ursa, attempts to woo his new fiancee to get her to love him. He decides that this involves spying on her to learn more about her, and enlists Zhao's help in doing so. As Ozai apparently knows less about flirting than his daughter, this fails miserably.
- Chapter 85: The characters' reactions to discovering that there are smut books being written about them. This line from Zuko (after he finds out Mai actually likes them) deserves special mention: "Mai, are you a pervert?"
- Chapter 96: Suki nailing Ruon Jian right in the crotch.
- Chapter 109 has the real reason Sozin planned to conquer the world: his (female) harem all quit and left him, partially because he insisted that they answer to "Roku."
- From Field Of Innocence, a young Lu Ten somehow managed to light Iroh's (metal) tsungi horn on fire by accident. Even he doesn't know how it happened.
- In Morality Chain, Zuko recounting what happened during the Siege of the North, to Azula's complete confusion.
Zuko: Uncle didn't betray anyone - he had the Fire Nation's best interests at heart, and now it's all come crashing down for him. This is even worse than exile - he's a fugitive, and he's alone. I mean, I know he told me he'd be fine, but he's old and alone. Uncle was right to protect the koi fish!Azula: The...koi fish.Zuko: Well, the moon spirit or whatever. The point is that Zhao shouldn't have tried to kill the moon.Azula: ...Kill the moon.Zuko: Yes! And then the Avatar wouldn't have merged with the ocean and created the giant koi fish and destroyed our navy! And the ocean wouldn't have grabbed Zhao and killed him.Azula: ...Zuko.Zuko: Yes.Azula: Has the Avatar mastered earthbending yet?Zuko: Uh, not since the last time I saw him. Why?Azula: Because something obviously hit you on the head rather hard, and I'm wondering if it was a boulder.
- In Blood of the Dragon, Zuko tries to make a Call-Back to the show before teaching Azula the Dancing Dragon.
Zuko: (grinning, takes Azula's hand) Azula, I need you to dance with me.
- In The Beacon, when Korra and Asami tell everyone that they are now dating, everyone reacts differently, but "the best reaction by far was Grandma Yin's. When the whole gang gathered at the Sato mansion to welcome the two young women home, she got a little too tipsy on rice wine."
Grandma Yin: See, Mako, this is what happens when you let go of nice girls like Korra and Asami. They'll just end up dating each other. Not that I'm unfamiliar with love between the ladies, you understand? You should have seen me in my prime. Before I met your grandfather, I had quite the fling with one of the Earth Queen's handmaidens. And what a hand maiden she was! I couldn't walk right for days after a night with her!Mako: Grandma Yin!Tenzin: (Face Palm)
- It's a Crowning Moment of Funny in-story, too: it makes Korra cry laughing.
- In Reluctant Hero, Fire soldier Shen decides to don Water Tribe clothes in order to infiltrate the North Pole and learn Zuko's whereabouts. The thing is, the crew found female clothes. Which means Shen has to play the pretty girl and use feminine wiles on a waterbender master to manage to see his prince.
- Alas for Shen, he played his part too well; when the whole crew goes undercover, Master Jayendra thinks they're "Keemi's" family and ask for their "daughter's" hand in marriage.
- So much of Squares, triangles and other shapes, to be expected given part of its summary, "Secret identities make fake dating...complicated.":
- The story opens with Chat Noir accidentally telling Ladybug that he has a girlfriend after responding to a conversation he had tuned out of. When he realises his mistake and tries to avoid telling Ladybug his girlfriend's name, he asks if she's jealous of her, leading Ladybug to claim she has a boyfriend. He then tries to fix it by offering to tell her if she tells him, which Ladybug unexpectedly agrees to. After counting to three, Chat, scrambling to think of the name of a girl who he knows, likes and could actually fake-date, answers "Marinette," while Ladybug answers "Adrien." Both Ladybug and Chat are appropriately shocked by this, being Marinette and Adrien respectively. In short, both are lying, both know that the other is lying for some reason, but neither knows that the other knows they're lying.
- Following this conversation, Ladybug runs home and changes back to Marinette just in time for Chat Noir to visit her on the balcony. He explains what's happened and begs her to back up his story if Ladybug happens to ask her. Marinette's grudgingly agrees, "but only because it’s kind of hilarious to see how much you fucked up and I kind of want to see the outcome of this." Early the next morning, Marinette visits Adrien as Ladybug, awkwardly explains her side of the mess she and Chat created and asks him to fake-date her. Adrien, who actually is in love with Ladybug, agrees with absolutely no hesitation. After she leaves:
Plagg: Good going, Romeo. You’re fake dating two people at once.
Adrien: I was having a good morning, way to ruin it.
Plagg: Good? You’re fake dating the girl you want to actually date.
Adrien: It’s better than nothing.
Plagg: It’s pathetic.
- And if this wasn't messed up enough, Ladybug gets photographed on Adrien's windowsill, revealing their "relationship" on the Ladyblog. And, just a day later, the same happens to Marinette and Chat Noir.
- In ''Adrien's Last Resort: Clothes of Revenge, Adrien finds a new way to get back at his father for his overbearing parenting ways: put on incredibly tacky clothes.
“Adrien go change! Are you trying to kill your father?!”
My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic
- Certain Advantages has Princess Celestia and Princess Luna entering the Sisterhooves Social obstacle race and... Hilarity Ensues. Every damn line. Highlights include:
Apple Bloom: “The princess’s bunghole is all in peril and such!”
- Celestia "sealing" her magic to be fair to the other racers.
- Everyone learning the proper meaning of "bunghole." It's a part of a barrel, like the one Celestia is stuck in for most of the story.
Spike: Whoa, that's freaky.
- "Meanwhile, back at the fjord, things had taken a turn for the theological."
- The crew of Diamond Dogs the Royal Sisters keep tormenting by accident. Only not really.
- Twilight crying and teleporting all over the place.
- Rainbow Dash failing to understand the meaning of "sardonic."
- "...and Scootaloo."
- Rainbow Dash being so stunned by the Sisters' performance that that she distorts space and time until she and everything around her are frozen in place.
- Granny's Smith's team of masseuses.
- Celestia's "little favor" she asks of the pie chef.
- “Oh dear,” she said, “I seem to have some difficulty with my bunghole.”
- Pretty much every time bunghole is used in a sentence.
- What Rarity Needs has Pinkie Pie learning to express disappointment.
- Pinkie: Oh no. That's bad. How do we express disappointment? I know, a party! No! Bad Pinkie Pie! Parties are only for good things. This is a Bad Thing. How do ponies express bad things? I know! Cursing!
Rarity: Darling, wha-?
Pinkie: FUCK A MAILBOX. SHIT DAMN. ASS.
Rarity: Pinkie Pie, dear, don't be vulgar! ...Especially when you're so bad at it...
- Celestia matter-of-factly explaining that everyone except her, Luna, Twilight Sparkle, and two others are actually changelings.
- The fact none of the changeling hives know about the others, leading to a flock of wolves all desperately pretending to be sheep.
- Cadence and Shining Armor don't know each other is a changeling.
- The reveal of who the other two true unicorns are that Twilight will have to have foals with, Trixie and Prince Blueblood.
- When moving into his new home in Retired to Equestria, former Evil Overlord Damien opens the door to find a surprise party waiting for him, despite the fact he has both of the only keys for the house that was locked until he got there. And he only bought the house half an hour prior. Eventually he decides to chalk it up to Pinkie Pie lest he be driven mad.
- The Beast Wars Fan Fic Make it Real Big is basically 1086 words of surreal Mind Screw hilarity, crack-parodying the quirks of the show and it's characters, such as 90's Bullet Time, silly catchphrases, Green Aesops, characters physical "evolution" being Merchandise-Driven, and Maximal and Predacon interactions (but, you know, if they were on drugs). Or maybe it's just one giant Transformers smack-fest. Either way, it's Crazy Awesome and hysterical from beginning to end. Perhaps the very best part? When the Maximals are saved by the love of the forest.
"Anybody call a dentist?"
- Dinobot's catch phrase is hilarious nonsensical, and yet makes perfect sense at the same time.
- One line from a JackxArcee fic while making sense in context, sounds like pure crack.
Jacke: “Now all I have to do is figure out how to survive telling my mom that I got my motorcycle pregnant.”
- Three Cubes of Energon and a Cell Door. Three gestalt commanders bond in a brig over energon and irritating teammates. Exactly What It Says on the Tin, and a brilliant Not So Different Only Sane Man moment between Silverbolt, Hot Spot, and Onslaught.
- In the The Transformers - The Real Ghostbusters crossover Slimer In The Machine, Slimer, goes off on his own while the Ghostbusters hunt down Starscream's Ghost. When questioned about his whereabouts, Slimer merely says that he was hungry. At the end, Galvatron discovers a slimy green substance all over the Decepticons' stash of Energon Cubes and freaks out.
Galvatron: AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH! THE ENERGON CUBES!!! WHAT IS THAT DISGUSTING GREEN SUBSTANCE ALL OVER THEM???!!!