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Quotes / Stand Still, Stay Silent

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Prologue

Aksel: If you come here, I'll be able to look after you properly!
Berit: I don't need to be looked after, you silly birdie!
Aksel: But—ah—what if...you fall down?
Berit: I'll get up and make myself some coffee.
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Michael: [loudly and angrily] I demand that you call your captain right now and tell him to turn back to the mainland! I have an important business meeting tomorrow!
Signe: Oh no, an important meeting? I'll call the captain right away on our direct emergency line! *picks up imaginary phone* Hello Captain! Oh yes I'm fine, how are you? So hey, I have a passenger here who would like you to turn back to Ystad...Oh? Oh dear, how unfortunate. I'm sure he'll understand, he seems like a reasonable man. *mimes hanging up* I'm sorry, another passenger already asked to be taken to the Bahamas, so we're heading there now. But you're next in line with your request!
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Aino: Umm, I don't mean to complain, but did you do something weird to these pizzas? They feel a tiny bit like elephant skin.
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Adventure I

Councilor: Look, I'll be blunt with you. The one positive aspect of your silly expedition was your refreshingly low budget. Otherwise the consensus was that it serves no national good and carries a substantial risk of complete failure. Your application passed with a single vote, and I believe one of my colleagues only voted 'yes' because he lost his glasses and didn't know what he was voting for.
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Taru: [reducing the budget to match the funds] ...and that would cut the food budget in half! I'm sure they'll be okay with hunting a bit. What else?
Siv: I think we've already removed everything our crew would need to survive.
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Trond: Another demographic we should look into is desperate people, like the ones who were recently fired. And the ones who hate their current employers or coworkers with a burning passion. Oh yes, I'm sure the pool of people who would be grateful to be offered a job like this is deep enough for our needs.
Taru: Ooh, and what about people who are extremely bored with their lives? I know where we can find people like that.
Siv: Our crew is just going to be a bunch of weirdos, isn't it?
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Emil: This is so beneath me!
Torbjörn: We're poor now, there's no such thing as "beneath us" anymore. Just sleep on the revolting sofas, Emil.
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Emil: This can not be happening! The worst first impression possible! Now they'll think of me as some sort of filthy pig for eternity! I'll never regain their respect!
Siv: There, there, you'll have plenty of time to make new impressions. Of course they could very well end up being lousy too.
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Tuuri: I haven't seen any children in so long, I almost forgot how cute you are!
Anna Västerström: You're kinda fat.
Tuuri: [smile curdles] I heard your parents say one of you is adopted and they don't love that one as much as the other two.
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Emil: You don't need to worry about him, he's surprisingly easy to communicate with. I haven't shared a single word with him, yet we already get along swimmingly.
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Tuuri: [being shown the Cat-Tank] Well... it's pretty nice, I suppose. Could be a lot worse. [looks back at other, much better rides] Just wish I hadn't seen those first.
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Tuuri: [looking at family photo] What do you think Onni is doing right now?
Lalli: Crying.
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Emil: You can get bruises on your FACE?! T-there's not a risk it'll leave a scar, is there?
Mikkel: A scar? No, I'm more concerned about cancer.
Emil: W-what?! What are you saying, man! Did you say "cancer"?!
Mikkel: Yes, yes I did. Without proper treatment face-bruises often turn into what we in the field of medicine call "face-cancer."
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Torbjörn: I can't thank you all enough for being part of this magnificent mission! But now... let's all get rich!
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Sigrun: ...and so uncle Trond saw that I was the most best out of everyone there and chose me!
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Sigrun: Ever faced a troll close up?
Emil: Yes, o-of course... once. But it was really big, a giant! I punched it right in one of its faces!
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Sigrun: Firearms are our last resort weapon. A cold blade through the brain is just as effective as any bullet, and most importantly won't wake up the whole block. If your life really depends on it, then sure, dish out some lead. But that also means the gig is up and we all better start running.
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Sigrun: Look, Emil, that's just something you have to expect in any kind of common spaces. It's not like people crawled out into the streets to die. But you learn to ignore it, dead folks aren't dangerous. Just kinda sad.
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Mikkel: I'm quite well, thank you. [beat] We're out of food.
Everybody: What?!
Mikkel: Yes. But we do have a surplus of candles.
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Torbjörn: W-what? They didn't drop off the supplies?
Sigrun: One crate filled with garbage food! And a second one mostly filled with a PERSON who is going to eat all of it!
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Emil: The prisoner is under control!
Mikkel: He's still not our prisoner.
Emil: Wait, did you say he's not a prisoner now?
Mikkel: As I said before: NOT a prisoner. No. N-O!
Emil: Why--why didn't anyone TELL me? I wouldn't have acted this way! We're mortal enemies now!
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Reynir: Oh, no, they'll notice I'm gone soon. They'll send someone for me.
Mikkel: They won't. [explains how it'll take weeks to send a quarantine vessel for him] In short: you're stuck here.
Reynir: But...but...yhhh! [slumps]
Mikkel: ...What about that funny story of yours?
Reynir: It's not funny anymore. It's stupid. I'm stupid.
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Reynir: I'm really sorry. I promise I won't eat a lot. And if you need help washing dishes or anything...
Mikkel: It's quite alright, I'm capable of working around situations such as these. And in a worst case scenario we can always eat you.
Reynir: That's...fair, I suppose.
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Sigrun: Don't worry about that. There won't be anything nesting in a place like this.[punches fist through the wall] This is what we in the troll hunting business call a "crap building". Because it's complete crap, you see.
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Sigrun: It was nice meeting you all and I hope we can meet up in Valhalla to chat some time.
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Mikkel: In conclusion: you are safe unless you went ahead and licked your arm. [beat] Did you lick your arm?
Reynir: ... ... No.
Mikkel: Well done.
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Sigrun: I... don't understand the question. There wasn't even a question in there! Is the question "is he a moron"?
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Tuuri: Do you ever think there might be people like us out there far, far away? And maybe they've found a book in one of our languages and they're now thinking "huh, what a weird language. I wonder if the people who spoke it are still out there?".
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Onni: And sometimes, there is simply nothing anyone can do about a bad situation. The world is a terrible place.
Reynir: ...I don't think I can agree with that.
Onni: And this is why you're in your situation. It's true.

Younger Tuuri: Why do you have to be a coward?
Younger Onni: Because I know enough to be one. [...] I know you can't hear them, but I can. You better trust me on this.
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Tuuri: I really thought... that it wouldn't happen. That... someone over there would be looking out for me.
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Emil: How can I even do this?
Lalli: By not being pathetic.
Emil: Good advice, thanks.
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Mikkel: You can't be a real leader if you haven't faced defeat, and proven that you can overcome it. So maybe you're right; what has happened is a test. But the actual test is right now.
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Mikkel: You isolent little child! Why did you run off like that? Sigrun is already ill and you almost gave her a heart attack!
Sigrun: What is your problem, you brain-dead moron? You almost gave Mikkel a heart attack!
Mikkel: Let's not resort to hyperbole, everyone calm down.
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Sleipnope: We are not here for your salvation! We are the abandoned! The unjustly suffering. And the world will be made to suffer with us! That is just! That is justice! That is our path!
Anne: Aren't you tired?
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Adventure II

Bjarni: Wait... decontamination showers? What was even the point of the suit then?
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Árni: [Icelandic] You all must be in need of a room while you are here, and I have plenty of those in my home. My family would be honored to be your hosts for your stay.
Sigrun: [Norwegian] What's he saying?
Mikkel: Free lodging.
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Jukka: When were you thinking of finally retiring?
Ensi: When I have my replacement properly trained and ready! And when I'm dead!
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