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Quotes: Batman

"I'm Batman."

...some call me The Batman.
Batman, Detective Comics #35 (not his first appearance, but the first instance of some form of this line).

"I'm Batman."
Batman, Batman Begins, to Carmine Falcone.

Harvey! I'm Batman!
Bruce Wayne Held Hostage, Batman Forever, attempting to reveal himself to Two-Face

Batman: I'm not going to kill you. I want you to do me a favor. I want you to tell all your friends about me.
Batman: I'm Batman.
Batman (1989)

Hi Freeze! I'm Batman.
Batman, Batman & Robin, to Mr. Freeze.

Terry McGinnis: You're Batman!
Bruce Wayne: I was Batman.

Mr. Fixx: You're pretty strong, for some clown who thinks he's Batman.
Terry McGinnis: I. AM. BATMAN!

Alfred: It seems you have discovered our little secret. Yes, I admit it. I am Batman.

Static: (waking up in the Batcave) Who're you?
Alfred: Batman.
Static:...I don't think so.
Alfred: Just once, I'd like someone to believe that.

I'm Batman.
Batman, The Batman, to Dracula.

I'm Batman.
Batman, Batman: The Brave and the Bold, to the Mirror Universe evil twins of The Blue Beetle and Green Arrow.

What, are you dense? Are you retarded or something? Who the hell do you think I am? I'm the Goddamn Batman.

I am the Batman.
Harvey Dent, The Dark Knight

I'm Batman!

Penguin: Joker?!
Penguin: Y'see, the thing is...you're NOT!

Darling, I don't have to answer to you. I'm Batman!

Riddler: Everyone knows Batman doesn't kill.
Logical Batman Duplicate: I'm Batman.
Aggressive Batman Duplicate: No, you're not! I'm Batman!!
Slacker Batman Duplicate: Nuh-uh, dudes, I'm Batman!

Batman: I'm Batman.
Chibi Batman: Please. Make me laugh again.
Batman: Excuse me?
Chibi Batman: I'm the goshdarn Batma
Batman: Be quiet.

Batman: "You are the slinking coward who killed Thomas and Martha Wayne."
Joe Chill: "That was a lifetime ago!"
Batman: "Yes, my lifetime. You took them without mercy or regret, and in cold blood, Chill!"
Joe Chill: "How do you know this? How could you possibly—"
Batman: "I know because I watched it happen. I know because I am the son of the man you murdered. I... am Bruce Wayne!"
Batman: The Brave and the Bold, "Chill of the Night"

"I'm not Hawkman."
Batman disguised as Hawkman, Superman/Batman #5

"I'm the Batman."
Batman, Batman: Death Mask

"I'm Batman."
Dick Grayson, establishing himself as the new Batman, Batman and Robin #3

"I'm Batman."
The Archivist-Bruce fusion, so we'll let you decide if he is Batman or not, Return of Bruce Wayne #6

"I'm Batman."
Batman to Deadman explaining how he figured out who Deadman was despite never having seen him, Brightest Day #14.

Achievement Unlocked - 10G I'm Batman.
Batman: Arkham City, after the Batsuit is acquired.

Bruce Wayne: "I am Batman."
Dick Grayson: "What?"
Bruce Wayne: "I... am... Batman."

Terry McGinnis: I'm Batman.
Later...
Terry McGinnis (to Bruce Wayne, about Static): He says his name's Beyoncé!

Squire: Oh, it's like that is it.

Terry McGinnis: Tell me something. Why were you so sure those voices weren't coming from you?
Bruce Wayne: Well first, I know I'm not psychotic.
Terry McGinnis: I hope your other reason is more convincing.
Bruce Wayne: And second, the voice kept calling me Bruce. In my mind, that's not what I call myself.
Terry McGinnis: What do you call yourself?
(Bruce simply gives a Meaningful Look)
Terry McGinnis: Oh yeah. I suppose you would. But that's my name now.
Bruce Wayne: Hm. Tell that to my subconscious.

"I'm Batman."
Lego!Batman, The LEGO Movie.'

Scorpion:"You are no Sub-Zero!"
Batman: I'm Batman.

"No, I'm Batman" (non-DC uses)
I'm Batman.
Batman, I'm a Marvel... And I'm a DC, to the audience, and to everyone else.note 

"Of course I'm the real Batman. See, here's a picture of me with Robin."
Adam West, star of the 1960s series Batman and its movie, Adam Westing, The Simpsons

I'm Batman.
Jim Kim imagining he's Batman in the first episode of Detention

I'm Batman.
The Angry Video Game Nerd as Batman, to every bad Bat-game he's about to pummel in his review of Batman video games. note 

"I'm Batman." (Batman cowl appears)
Ask That Guy, answering a stupid question

Dean: I'm Batman.
"I am the bat."
Hank Venture, The Venture Bros.

Ferr: You are the night.
Maxwell Adams: I am Batman.
Ferr: You're invisible, you got the Hookshot... you're Batman.

I'm Batman.
Eric Matthews, Boy Meets World. He actually is Batman.

Victor: Ho—Holy...
Gert: You're... You're...
Spider-Man: Yes. I'm Batman.

You're not a dark and troubled soul. You're a doctor who thinks he's Batman.

Concussed football player: I'm fine, let's go!
Coach: Hold on, where are you?
Football player: I'm in New York.
Coach: Who am I?
Football player(grinning): You're the coach.
Coach: And who are you?
Football player: ...I'm Batman.
Coach: Sit down.
"Batman": You don't understand, I'm Batman!

Dude, the guy is a teacher, not- (secret passage to underground lab opens) ...Batman...
Conner McKnight, Power Rangers Dino Thunder, about Dr. Tommy Oliver

Sheldon: I couldn't become Green Lantern unless I was chosen by the Guardians of Oa, but given enough start-up capital and an adequate research facility, I could be Batman.
Leonard: You could be Batman?
Sheldon: Sure! (gravelly voice) I'm Batman!... See?

Kramer: The bus is OUTTA CONTROL! So I grab him by the collar, I take him out of the seat, I get behind the wheel, and now I'm driving the bus!
Jerry: Wow.
George: You're Batman.
Kramer: Yeah. Yeah, I am Batman!

Linkara, in his Batman voice: I'm not Batman, I'm totally not Batman... *mimicks hiding his mouth with a cape* I'm Batman.

"I'm Batman. And I can breathe in space."

"Might as well come clean: I am Batman. [J]"
Jeff, Everyman HYBRID, confirming one of the fandom's theories via Twitter.

"If I were to go on there and write that, I don't know, I'm Batman, how long would I legitimately be Batman?"

Batman: I'm Batman.
Superman: I know you are.
Batman: It's what I do.
Superman: I know. You say that a lot.
Superman: ...Dude, it's cool.

Superman: But dude, you know what I would've done?
Batman: Oh, I don't know, probably just-
Superman and Batman simultaneously: Fly really fast, saving everyone from the bullets and explosions!
Superman: Exactly!
Batman: Yeah, well, I can't do those things. Because I'm not an super-bulletproof alien from another planet that can defy gravity. But you know what I can do?
Superman: What's that?
Batman: Make an incredibly awesome movie! ...You know why?
Superman: [Resigned] Because you're Bat-
Batman: Because I'm Batman!

Superman: Dude, I catch falling planes in mid-air every other week.
Batman: ... And I'm Batman.

"I'm Batman."

"Oh, I'm Batman."
Homestar Runner attempting to make a crank call to Marzipan

"What? I bring joy to the world. I am filled with mirth and sunlight. Also, I am Batman."

"Hello. I'm Batman. I remember it, because I'm Batman."

Batman: Hey, guess what.
Dr. Young: What now?
Batman: Could you ask that again, using a complete sentence with more words?
Dr. Young: (Groans) What do you want this-
Batman: I'M BATMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Pinky: Who the fuck just hit me?
Black Belt Jones: Batman, motherfucker!
Black Belt Jones

"Hi... I'm Batman - FUCK! ...I'm... Bruce Wayne..."
Bruce Wayne, Holy Musical B@man!

"[Don] Draper? No one’s ever lifted that rock. He could be Batman for all we know."
Harry Crane, Mad Men

Alex Trebek: Mr. Keaton.
Michael Keaton: ...I'm Batman.
Alex Trebek: No, you are not.
— Celebrity Jeopardy, Saturday Night Live

Alex Trebek: Let's see what Mr. Keaton came up with, you wrote... "Val Kilmer sucks."
Michael Keaton: ...I'm Batman.
Alex Trebek: Okay, and your wager... "George Clooney sucks."
— Celebrity Jeopardy, Saturday Night Live

Boy I am not Jeff. I am The Batman.
Mother: The Batman, would you like a chocolate milk?
Boy: Yes. Yes, The Batman would.
(Boy sits down with his chocolate milk. He keeps a stern look on his face as he sips the drink.)
Boy: *sips* Gotham is safe.

Steve: I don't believe this. How could they put me at the kids table? I'm 14.
Random Kid: I'm Batman.
Steve: No, you aren't!
— American Dad, Buck Wild


Everything else

Bruce Wayne: Dad's estate left me wealthy. I am ready...but first I must have a disguise. Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot. So my disguise must be able to strike terror into their hearts. I must be a creature of the night, black, terrible...a...a...
- As if in response, a huge bat flies in the open window!
Bruce Wayne: A bat! That's it! It's an omen. I shall become a BAT!
- And thus is born this weird creature of the dark...this avenger of evil; 'The Batman'
— The original origin of the Batman, Detective Comics #33.

Wonder Woman: Circumstances asides, it was kind of enjoyable being a kid again.
Batman: I haven't been a kid since I was eight years old.
Justice League Unlimited, "Kid Stuff"

Am I blue? / Am I blue? / Ain't these tears in my eyes telling you...

It's not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.
Batman, Batman Begins

Some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.
Alfred Pennyworth on The Joker, The Dark Knight

Tell me something me friend, did you ever dance with the devil by the pale moonlight?
The Joker, Batman

Penguin: You don't really think you'll win, do you?
Batman: Things change.
Batman Returns

How about a magic trick? I'm going to make this pencil disappear.

7 million. Never leave the cave without it.
Batman, using his Bat Credit Card, Batman & Robin

People think it's an obsession. A compulsion. It's never been like that. I chose this life. On any given day, I could stop. Today isn't that day. Tomorrow won't be either.
Batman, Identity Crisis

All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day.

Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb.
Batman, Batman: The Movie

"My world goes crazy sometimes."
Batman, Detective Comics #475

"By the gods! You pursue me past your dying...! Are you man— Or fiend from hell?"

"Yet we're linked, you and I. Like comedy and tragedy. Two sides, same coin."
The Joker to Batman, The Batman, "The Bat In The Belfry"

"It wasn't the money I wanted. It wasn't the action I sought. I just liked the attention."
The Riddler, Detective Comics Annual #8, on why he is who he is.

"Why are we doing this? Because we are now two faces. One good, the other bad. Half-and-half. Fifty fifty. Opposite and equal. And we're deadlocked. When that happens... we let the coin decide."
Two-Face, Batman Annual #14, explaining his philosophy as he holds a gun to his abusive father. The coin comes good-heads up just as Batman barges in.

Red Robin: Bruce, you're Batman. You've lost your memory somehow, but you're this rich guy who dresses up in a costume to scare bad guys.
Return of Bruce Wayne #6. Robin brings it back to first principles for us.

An almost legendary figure, the cowled shadow of The Batman prowls through the night, preying upon the criminal parasite like the winged creature whose name he has adopted!
— The standard tagline accompanying each Batman front page, circa Strange Apparitions...

I made a promise on the grave of my parents to rid this city of the evil that took their lives. By day, I am Bruce Wayne, billionaire philanthrophist. At night, criminals, a cowardly and superstitious lot, call me...BATMAN
...and circa Hush by Jeph Loeb.

Mr. Freeze: Tonight I mean to pay back the man who ruined my life...our lives...
Batman: Even if you have to kill everyone in the building to do it?
Mr. Freeze: *nods* Think of it, Batman. To never again walk on a summer's day with a hot wind in your face, and a warm hand to hold...oh yes. I'd kill for that.
— "Heart of Ice", Batman: The Animated Series

"There are times when I, too, disagree with Master Bruce's decisions. And when that happens, there's something I do that never fails to lift my spirits. I disobey him."
Alfred, The Batman, "The Joining"

Harley: There's one thing I gotta know: why'd you stay with me all day? Risking your life for someone who's never given you anything but trouble?
Batman: I know what it's like to try and rebuild a life. (gives her the dress she paid for) I had a bad day too, once.
Harley:...Nice guys like you shouldn't have bad days. (kisses him on the cheek, turns away - then plants one on him)
— "Harley's Holiday"

Ace: When I was little, Cadmus used to make me play all kinds of games. They'd strap me into their machines and poke wires into my brain, "Ace, can you move this object with your mind?" (uproots a tree and launches it into the sky) Yeah. I can move it. They weren't really games, you know. They were training me, turning me into a weapon - for 'justice', they said. They got their weapon. I got cheated out of my childhood.
Batman: I know what that's like.
Ace: You do, don't you? (smiles) You don't have to answer. I've read your mind. That's how I knew you weren't going to use Mrs Waller's weapon on me.
Batman: No. I wasn't. (drops Waller's kill-switch)
Ace: You were going to try and talk me into fixing what I've changed...before I die.
Batman: Yes.
Ace:...I'm dying very soon.
Batman: Yes. I'm sorry.
Ace: (quietly, crying) Would you stay with me? I'm scared.
(Batman sits next to her - when he offers his hand, she takes it)
Justice League, "Epilogue"

Bruce: You don't know the first thing about the American justice system, do you?
Tim: I know it's bogus.
Bruce: And how did you come to that well-thought-out conclusion?
Tim: Watching you.
Batman: I imagine this is a unique opportunity for you. It must be odd for you to have the chance to catalog new levels of physical discomfort, as you rarely experience them.
Superman: What kind of masochist keeps track of the different kinds of pain they've -
Batman: Four hundred and ninety-six by my last count.

Batman: (on making Robin his sidekick at age nine) Robin needed to help bring the man who murdered his family to justice.
Wonder Woman: So he could turn out like you?
Batman:...So that he wouldn't.

"Of all the descriptive names of all the things people say when they hear a hero in action, The Amazing Spiderman, The Incredible Hulk, The Invincible Iron Man, the only descriptive word for this guy is 'The God-damn Batman!"

Bruce Wayne: Yes, father. I shall become a bat.

Bat-Mite: Batman's rich history allows him to be interpreted in a multitude of ways. To be sure, this is a lighter incarnation, but is certainly no less valid and true to the character's roots as the tortured avenger, crying out for mommy and daddy.
A rebuttal to angry fans of Batman: The Animated Series, Batman: The Brave and the Bold, Legends Of The Dark Mite

"Ladies. Gentlemen. You have eaten well. You've eaten Gotham's wealth. Its spirit. Your feast is nearly over. From this moment on — none of you are safe."
Batman, Batman: Year One

Superman: Big man in a Batsuit. Take that away, what are you?
Batman: A genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, detective, pilot, escape artist, master of disguise; fluent in Japanese, Cantonese, Mandarin, Spanish, French, Latin, German, Russian...mastered 127 styles of martial arts, including taekwondo, judo, muay thai, karate, boxing, jujitsu, ninjitsu...degrees in criminal science, forensics, computer science, chemistry, engineering, biology, advanced chemistry, technology...
"Criminals are a terror. Hearts of the night. I must disguise my terror. Criminals are cowardly. A superstitious terrible omen. A cowardly lot. My disguise must strike terror. I must be black. Terrible. Criminals are a superstitious cowardly lot. I must be a creature. I must be a creature of the night. Mommy's dead. Daddy's dead. Brucie's dead. I shall become a bat."

More than anyone else in the world, when you scratch everything else away from Batman, you're left with someone who doesn't want to see anybody die.

Young man, you have two seconds to take your remove your hands from my person before I remove them for you.
'Alfred Pennyworth to the Goddamned Batman, after the latter has grabbed him and shoved him against a wall, showing everyone that Batman is No Badass to His Valet.

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