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Edible Bludgeon

Food used as melee weapons. Be sure to take note of the fact that a Genre Savvy criminal will realize that they can Eat the Evidence if the weapon was used to commit a crime without having to suffer horrific indigestion as a result.

Baguette Beatdown is a Sub-Trope. See also Edible Ammunition, Produce Pelting, Shamu Fu, Food Slap, Bad with the Bone, and Fork Fencing.

Examples:

Anime and Manga
  • In Ranma ˝, foods, such as Okonomiyaki, Ramen, and Takoyaki, are used as a weapon a number of times.
  • In Digimon Data Squad, Raramon uses Sausages as Nunchucks in the movie. AND IT IS AWESOME.

Comic Books
  • In The Batman And Robin Adventures #5, The Joker attempts to beat a henchman to death with a bunch of bananas for welshing on a bet. He later regrets this — not for any moral reason, just the fact that bananas aren't sturdy enough to be an effective truncheon. The next time he attempts this, he uses plantains instead.
  • Deadpool beat up Bullseye (who was dressed as Hawkeye) with a giant ham. While decked out in a meat armor.

Film
  • Not sure if this goes better under Produce Pelting, but in Mrs. Doubtfire there is a scene at the pool where Daniel, in full Doubtfire costume, wings a lime at the back of his rival Stuart's head. Stuart turns and sees Mrs. Doubtfire standing all by herself next to the fruit stand. Daniel claims it was a poolboy angry at Stuart for an inadequate tip:
    Mrs. Doubtfire: "Oh, the terrorists! They run that way. It was a run-by fruiting."
  • Smith from Shoot 'em Up uses carrots almost as much as guns, most often for stabbing.
  • In Beverly Hills Ninja, where Haru wields two large tuna.
  • Thanks to Bowdlerization, we have Michelangelo in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze using a couple joints of sausage in place of his nunchucks.
    Michelangelo: (Grabs sausages) Combat coldcuuuuuuuts!
  • Disney's Sleeping Beauty has a brief scene played for laughs when an offended and mildly drunk King Hubert tries to attack his host King Stefan with a very large fish. However, since the fish isn't frozen it goes all floppy in a few hits against a metal serving tray used as an improvised shield. The absurdity of the situation makes them engage in some tension-lifting laughter.
  • In Law Abiding Citizen, Clyde shivs his cellmate with the bone from his T-bone steak.

Literature
  • The Trope Codifier is Roald Dahl's Lamb to the Slaughter, in which a frozen leg of lamb is used as a murder weapon. The killer gets the police investigators to eat the evidence.
  • In Discworld, Dwarven Bread is well known to be a backup weapon. It's fairly good at this, because it's not required to be so much actually edible as theoretically edible (if you're hungry, think about eating some dwarven bread, and then you won't be hungry anymore).
    • Cohen, an Affectionate Parody of the below, bites his shield because it's made out of chocolate.
  • Several examples of Conan the Barbarian using a leg/joint of meat to bludgeon someone in a pinch, typically because he's been stripped of weapons after being imprisoned.

Live-Action TV
  • Classic example is the leg o' lamb from Alfred Hitchcock Presents, adapted from the aforementioned Roald Dahl story.
  • The Monty Python's Flying Circus sketch "Self-defence against fresh fruit" must fit somewhere.
    Drill Sergeant Nasty: Now, it's quite simple to defend yourself against the banana fiend. First of all, you force him to drop the banana, next, you eat the banana, thus disarming him. You have now rendered him helpless.
    • From the same show, the Fish-Slapping Dance. Light slaps to the cheek with mackerel (or some similarly sized fish) are replied to with the piscine equivalent of a truncheon, knocking Michael Palin straight into the river. No-one actually eats any of the fish, but they could have.
  • Discussed with Jose Jalapeno on a Stick in Controlled Chaos.
  • The ancient Lancastrian martial art Ecky Thump featured in The Goodies mainly involves hitting people over the head with a black pudding. It's devastatingly effective.
  • In one episode of QI, Bill Bailey suggests a prisoner on death row should request a stale baguette and a pineapple as part of their last meal, then craft them into some sort of medieval mace and use it to fight off the guards.
  • In 1000 Ways to Die, a pervert flashes a group of Action Moms and they reply via squirting him with their baby bottles full of breast milk. The perv grabs one and drinks the contents... too bad that the lady had eaten peanuts (so the milk had some traces of peanut in it) and the pervert had a peanut allergy, which ends up killing him.
  • Midsomer Murders: In "Schooled in Murder", the first Victim of the Week is pinned beneath a set of shelves and has a large wheel of cheese dropped on her head.
  • Kaamelott has an entire episode dedicated to Those Two Guys discussing their latest ingenious martial art: Improvised Weapons made from food. The high point is the extended demonstration on how to fight using fennel.
    Karadoc: Step one, learn to recognize punt objects.
    Arthur: Punt?
    Perceval: Punt objects, ones that do damage. Is that the right word?
    Arthur: No, no, sorry, I misheard, punt objects. Carry on.
    Perceval: So, sire, do you think a fennel is a punt object?
    Arthur: Well, I'm not an expert on fennel combat, but instinctively, I'd say it's not.
    Karadoc: Trick question.
    Perceval: In this case, the answer is yes and no.
    Karadoc: The newbie sees it, he grabs it by the stem and tries to hit you with the sporadic part, right?
    Arthur: The sporadic part.
    Perceval: Yeah, sporadic, when it's ball-shaped.
    Arthur: Uh huh.
    Karadoc: You'd have taken it by the stem, right?
    Arthur: This is still in the event that I find myself having to fight with a fennel, yes?
    Perceval: Yeah.
    Arthur: Possibly, yes.
    Karadoc: And that's where you're wrong, because if you look closely, the sporadic part has no prosperities, and therefore, is smooth.
    Perceval: So, you need to grab it by the ballian part-
    Karadoc: -Or sporadic-
    Perceval: -and fight with the stem.
    Karadoc: The stemian part.
    Perceval: Whose tip can be considered punty.
    Karadoc: You still following, sire?
  • In an episode of Murder, She Wrote, a frozen fish was the murder weapon (the murder took place in a restaurant; the restaurant's accountant confronted a stealing employee and ended up using the fish in self-defense). And yes, it got eaten, but not intentionally.
  • In one episode of Sliders when trapped in a Virtual Reality world, Rembrandt asks asks the ally hacker for a hammer to fight the bad guy's empowered minions. He gets a ham. Still useful as he throws it hard enough to knock the minion out.

Music
  • In "Benny The Bouncer" by Emerson, Lake & Palmer, Benny uses a frozen meat pie in his fight with Sid The Greaser.
  • The song "Ernie (The Fastest Milkman in the West)" by Benny Hill features a fight between Ernie and his rival Two-Ton Ted who drives the bakers van using wares from their vans. Ernie is killed by rock cake underneath his heart followed by stale pork pie in the eye.

Newspaper Comics
  • Bloom County: Opus, the mime, and the olive loaf.
  • Garfield: In one strip Garfield offers a loaf of French bread to Jon so he can flatten a weird lump under the tablecloth.
    Jon: Wait a second. Where's Odie?
    Garfield: Odie? Who's Odie?

Tabletop Games

Video Games
  • The Scout in Team Fortress 2 has a mackerel wrapped in newspaper.
    • He also has a candy cane. The description notes that while its not practical, it sure is humiliating.
    • Subverted with the Pyro's Lollichop, which looks like a lollipop to... them, but is actually an axe.
    • The Ham Shank
  • One of the melee-weapons available in Naughty Bear is a whole ham. It packs a mean whallop...
  • In the Pokémon games, Farfetch'd uses a leek as a weapon.
  • The trolls in Heroes of Might and Magic 3 hold big thigh bones with the meat on them for bludgeon weapons, scrolling the mouse cursor over them makes them take a bite out of the meat.
  • Several of the joke weapons in the Soul Series are foods, such as shiskabobs and a giant sausage.
  • A few of the joke weapons in Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days are food-related as well. Zexion gets an enormous sandwich, Axel gets a pair of pizzas with one slice missing from each, and Saix can swing around a giant banana peel in place of his usual sword.
  • Some of the improvised weapons used by Joachim and Frank in the Shadow Hearts series are technically edible. Specifically, a tuna, a swordfish, and a shish-kebab.
  • Disgaea 3 and Disgaea 4 have "fun" weapons that include edible things like lollipops, shish-kebabs, and baked potatoes. Their actual equipment stats are generally close to non-existent, but they all possess useful secondary abilities.
  • In Phantom Brave, bread and fish are among the items you can use as weapons.
  • Elona has equipment that can be either candy or raw, that can then be eaten.
  • In Sengoku Basara 2, we have the joke weapons of Kojuro (a leek used as a katana), Toshiie (a swordfish), Ranmaru (a chocolate banana), and Ieyasu (a giant shrimp).
    • Hideaki from Sengoku Basara 3 can throw food carrots and lobsters at enemies.
  • Chrono Cross has Janice, a half-rabbit monster trainer that attacks enemies with a giant carrot.
  • In Banjo-Tooie, pink and blue Flatsos use sausages and candy canes, respectively.
  • Dark Cloud: The Frozen Tuna.
  • PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale has several examples, including Sir Daniel tossing a drumstick of chicken at his enemies, Sackboy launching a cupcake as a projectile weapon, and the sturgeon from the market scene in Uncharted 3 being used as an item pick-up.
  • Super Mario Bros.:
    • Veggies in Super Mario Bros. 2 can be plucked from the ground and thrown at enemies. In fact, throwing veggies (and other non food objects) is the only way to defeat enemies in the game.
    • The veggies return in Captain Toad: Treasure Tracker, where they are one of a limited number of ways for Captain Toad to defeat enemies.
  • In Don't Starve, you can make a Ham Bat, which is exactly what it sounds like. Unlike all the other tools and weapons in the game, it has unlimited durability. Also unlike all the other tools and weapons in the game but very much like foodstuffs, it slowly spoils over time.

Visual Novels
  • In Little Busters!, one of the possible Improvised Weapons that can be used in a fight is an eel pie the characters use to whack the other battler. It isn't very good, though, and after each attack it has a random probability of bending in half, which weakens its damage potential for the rest of the match even further.

Web Animation
  • RWBY: The Food Fight in episode 1 of Volume 2 has food such as breadsticks, turkeys, watermelon on a stick, sausage links, leeks, etc. used as weapons by Team RWBY and Team JNPR.

Web Comics
  • In Girl Genius, one cook was threatened by his own granddaugh—Aaah! Not with the schlognwurst! It's expensive!. It promptly is used against the Jäger. Other implements include a barrel of pickled herrings and a jar of olives.
    • Bilingual Bonus too: "schlogn" is yiddish for "hit".
      • Or, if you will, slugging.
  • In Not Quite Daily Comic, characters use carrots for dagger practice. Then eat them.
  • In Insecticomics, Prowl tells a class of would-be ninjas that anything can be used as a weapon; smart-ass Lazorbeak picks a six-foot party sub. Prowl promptly assembles one and takes her down with it.

Western Animation
  • Rocket Robin Hood featured fight scenes in which a hambone and a sack of flour would be used as weapons.
  • Batman: Mask of the Phantasm: during his fight with the Phantasm, the Joker reaches a cutting board behind him. He ignores the knife laying there, and instead grabs the giant hunk of salami.
    • And once, Harley Quinn knocked out a thug with a cod. While telling him to grab his own hostage.
    • In The Batman, Joker sets up an ambush for a vigilante targeting super-villains. His henchmen are armed with pies. Granted it's silly, but since this is the Joker we're talking about, chances are they aren't safe for consumption.
  • An episode from the 90s cartoon adaptation of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles involves a battle between the heroes and the Shredder in the kitchen of a pizza parlor. Hilarity Ensues.
  • In the beginning of X-Men: Evolution's third season, Wolverine and Rogue evade capture by authorities by using a small convenience store's grocery items to blind and disorient, but not hurt them...too much...before making their getaway.
  • Broadway uses one in an earlier Gargoyles episode.
  • An episode of Phineas and Ferb had Dr. Doofenshmirtz and Perry dueling with hotdogs and bratwursts. Doubles as a homage to Star Wars.
  • In The Simpsons, Bart once tormented Principal Skinner with peanuts (Skinner has a peanut allergy). Skinner eventually retaliates when he discovers that Bart is allergic to shrimp. They end up fencing each other, with Bart wielding a peanut on a stick and Skinner wielding a shrimp on a stick. They both wind up falling into a vat full of peanut shrimp.
  • In the pilot episode of Adventures of the Gummi Bears, Kevin clubs an ogre in the head from behind with a ham leg.

Real Life
  • There is a story about a deli owner breaking a would-be robber's nose with a salami.


Dung FuImprovised IndexBaguette Beatdown
Eat MeCombat TropesBaguette Beatdown
Edible AmmunitionFood TropesBaguette Beatdown
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RiftsImageSource/Tabletop GamesSavage Worlds

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