Quotes: Katanas Are Just Better

There's nothing more reliable than a Japanese sword, is there?
Saito Hajime, Rurouni Kenshin

Hey, that was an unbreakable kawajiri blade! ...ok, refund on the unbreakable part, but it was still shiny and cool!

TG: brought my phone and i also took my awesome katana with me in case things get too hot to handle
TG: and they always do
EB: you mean that cheap piece of shit you have on your wall?
TG: FU
TG: its sharp and its awesome and its a sword
TG: end of story

You retrieve your UNBREAKABLE KATANA. A real hard sword for a real hard dude. It was said to be forged by an ancient Otaku Master over the heat of a roaring manga fire. It was cooled in an enchanted spring where virgin horses nicker and bathe, and was said could be used only by one whose pointy anime shades were deemed sweet enough, and whose hair existed in a perpetually sculpted state of looking completely fucking awesome. All of those things were said by you.

Oh, what is it with you sword guys and talking about how cool your swords are?
Brock Samson, The Venture Bros.

That's it. I'm sick of all this "Masterwork Bastard Sword" bullshit that's going on in the d20 system right now. Katanas deserve much better than that. Much, much better than that.
I should know what I'm talking about. I myself commissioned a genuine katana in Japan for 2,400,000 Yen (that's about $20,000) and have been practicing with it for almost 2 years now. ->I can even cut slabs of solid steel with my katana.
Japanese smiths spend years working on a single katana and fold it up to a million times to produce the finest blades known to mankind.
Katanas are thrice as sharp as European swords and thrice as hard for that matter too. Anything a longsword can cut through, a katana can cut through better. I'm pretty sure a katana
could easily bisect a knight wearing full plate with a simple vertical slash.
Ever wonder why medieval Europe never bothered conquering Japan? That's right, they were too scared to fight the disciplined Samurai and their katanas of destruction. Even in World
War II, American soldiers targeted the men with the katanas first because their killing power was feared and respected.
So what am I saying? Katanas are simply the best sword that the world has ever seen, and thus, require better stats in the d20 system. Here is the stat block I propose for Katanas:
(One-Handed Exotic Weapon) 1d12 Damage 19-20 x4 Crit +2 to hit and damage Counts as Masterwork
(Two-Handed Exotic Weapon) 2d10 Damage 17-20 x4 Crit +5 to hit and damage Counts as Masterwork
Now that seems a lot more representative of the cutting power of Katanas in real life, don't you think?
tl;dr = Katanas need to do more damage in d20, see my new stat block.
4chan /tg/ copypasta "Katanas are Underpowered in d20"

That's it. I'm sick of all this "Masterwork Bastard Sword" bullshit that's going on in the d20 system right now. Katanas deserve much worse than that. Much, much worse than that.
I should know what I'm talking about. I myself commissioned a genuine katana in Japan for 120 Yen (that's about $1) and have been practicing with it for almost 2 years now. I can't even cut wooden boards with my katana.
Japanese smiths spend years working on a single katana and fold it up to a million times to produce some of the biggest pieces of shit known to mankind.
Katanas are barely half as sharp as European swords and half as hard for that matter too. Anything a longsword can cut through, a katana can't cut through at all. I'm pretty sure a katana would break trying to cut a knight wearing full plate with any kind of slash.
Ever wonder why feudal Japan never bothered conquering Europe? That's right, they were too scared to fight the disciplined Knights and their Oakeshott types X through XXII of destruction. Even in World War II, Japanese soldiers targeted the men with the mamelukes first because their killing power was feared and respected.
So what am I saying? Katanas are simply the worst sword that the world has ever seen, and thus, require worse stats in the d20 system. Here is the stat block I propose for Katanas:
(One-Handed Exotic Weapon) 1d4 Damage x2 Crit -2 to hit and damage Can never count as Masterwork
(Two-Handed Exotic Weapon) 1d6 Damage x2 Crit -1 to hit and damage Can never count as Masterwork
Now that seems a lot more representative of the cutting power of Katanas in real life, don't you think?
tl;dr = Katanas need to do much less in d20, see my new stat block.
1d4chan 2 "Katanas are Overpowered in d20"

All the best stuff is made in Japan.
— description of the Katana, Dungeons Of Dredmor