Literature / Nobody Gets the Girl

A superhero genre novel written by James Maxey.

Richard Rogers awakes one morning to find himself transformed into an invisible man. Suddenly thrust into a new life as a superhero called Nobody, he fights alongside two stunningly sexy superheroines - Rail Blade and the Thrill - in an effort to save the world. A one-hundred-foot baby doll with a gun for a head is just one if the obstacles in his path. The real drama lies in his quest to regain his identity. But the door to that plane of his existence may be closed forever...

There's also a standalone sequel called Burn Baby Burn: A Supervillain Novel that focuses on two of the villains from the first book, Sundancer and Pit Geek.

As you can see the page is a bit threadbare. Needs Wiki Magic Love.
These books contain examples of:

  • Action Girl: Rail Blade.
  • A God Am I: The more we find out about them, the more clear it becomes that both Dr. Know and Rex Monday have serious God complexes.
    • Rail Blade shows signs of this as well.
  • And I Must Scream: Part of Servant's backstory is that he was a drug kingpin that picked a fight with Rail Blade and got himself sealed in huge block of iron.
    • Before the big reveal Richard thought the afterlife was going to spending the spend the rest of eternity like a Saturday morning that would never end.
  • Alliterative Name: Richard Rogers
  • Beware the Quiet Ones: After Dr. Know’s wife kills him her daughter mention how quiet and harmless she was, like a little statue in the library.
  • Big, Screwed-Up Family: In spades. Dr. Know treats his daughters Rail Blade and the Thrill as soldiers in his war. His wife (the one nonpowered member of the family) can't deal with the weirdness and reaches the point of wanting to kill him. See also the Unperson entry.
  • Compelling Voice: The Thrill's voice has an overtone that activates people's pleasure centers when they follow her instructions.
  • Cry for the Devil: Pit Geek is a disgusting murderous creature in the first book, but is presented much more sympathetically in the second as we learn about his mental state and background. Sundancer also becomes more sympathetic, especially when she finally accepts that the war between Rex Monday and Dr. Know is over.
  • Defrosting Ice Queen: Rail Blade in the first book, Sundancer in the second.
  • Diabolus ex Nihilo: Nobody knows what the deal with Pit Geek is, not even himself or Rex Monday.
  • Did You Just Punch Out Cthulhu?: Nobody killed both rex and dr know
  • Emotion Bomb: Panic has the power to induce raw terror over a wide area.
  • Extreme Omnivore/Stomach of Holding: Pit Geek.
  • Grey and Gray Morality: Dr. Know wants to cure all the ills of the world and is willing to kill people and take control of their lives to do it; Rex Monday wants to stop him and is willing to kill people and terrorize populations to do it. Their willingness to toss ethical constraints out the window arguably reaches the level of Evil Versus Evil.
  • Heel–Faith Turn: In Burn Baby Burn, Servant claims to have been a former drug lord who turned good after being released from the And I Must Scream mentioned above and accepting Jesus.
  • Hive Mind: This is how Dr. Know plans to prevent Cloning Blues so he can live forever.
  • Invisibility/Intangible Man: Richard, after he's been not-quite removed from reality. He can only be seen and touched by Dr. Know, Rail Blade, and the Thrill and Rex Monday.
  • Kick the Dog: After explaining the The Time Traveller's Dilemma Dr. Knowbokov beat the crap out of Richard.
  • Meta Origin: Dr. Nicolas Knowbokov's "vacuum bomb" caused the universe to transition to a new quantum state. Knowbokov's consciousness survived as an "observer" and provided the template around which the universe reassembled. Because he was a longtime fan of superhero comic books, the new reality included super powers.
  • Our Worm Holes Are Different: It's revealed in Burn Baby Burn that Sundancer's actual power is to open wormholes. Since the sun happens to be the largest source of gravity in the area, the other end of the wormholes open up there, allowing her to vent fire from them.
  • Playing with Fire: Sundancer, one of Rex Monday's henchmen.
  • Power Degeneration/Your Days Are Numbered: Sundancer is immune to the heat she channels from the sun, but the hard radiation that comes with it eventually gives her cancer.
  • Powers as Programs: Played literally straight in Ap's case.
  • Punny Name: The villain in the first book calls himself Rex Monday, which is a pun on Rex Mundi, which is Latin for king of the world. Also the first book's name.
  • Ret Gone: Richard wakes up one morning to find that nobody can see or hear him, and that he can only interact with physical objects when nobody is looking. This is a side effect of Dr. Know's time travel — he inadvertently distracted Richard's father, causing him to buy a non-defective pack of condoms.
  • Screw This, I'm Outta Here!: The Thrill, Rail Blade, and Richard all leave after the Jerusalem fiasco.
  • Staying Alive: Dr. Know poisons Rail Blade after she destroys Jerusalem. The poison stops her heart, but her powers enable her to keep her blood circulating without it.
  • The Time Traveler's Dilemma: When Dr. Know explains why Richard is out of phase with reality, Richard asks him if he can fix it with another time travel expedition. Dr. Know refuses to attempt it, because it would erase four other people (in Richard's absence, his parents later had two other children and his wife married someone else and had two children) from the timeline.
  • Unperson: Dr. Know had a son who was accidentally killed by Rail Blade. He buried him in an unmarked grave, destroyed all his pictures, and tried to make the family forget that he'd ever existed because the memory made Rail Blade afraid to use her powers.
  • Unstoppable Rage: After a plan to bring peace to the Middle East fails disastrously, Rail Blade totally loses it and levels Jerusalem (though she does remove the people first), leaving a message threatening more of the same unless the world makes peace within a year.
  • Utopia Justifies the Means: Doctor Know's got a plan to save the world and he doesn't mind letting innocent civilians die or killing a few reporters who stumble across his secrets. See also the Wetware CPU entry.
  • Villain Protagonist: Sundancer and Pit Geek in Burn Baby Burn.
  • Wetware CPU: Dr. Know has arranged to have death-row inmates delivered to him after faked executions; he keeps them in life support canisters and uses them as living computers.
    • Baby Gun is an atrophied body permanently installed in the giant Baby Gun doll.