Fanfic / Your Father and Mine

Your Father and Mine is a Hetalia: Axis Powers fanfiction written on FanFiction.Net by Redbayly.

In which America's fifty children — each personifying one of his states — are not a secret, that's just he didn't care about explaining their existence to the other Nations. Yet as with every secret, it's bound to get dragged in daylight one day, and considering the American Nations' general temperament, it happens... explosively so.

And with this reveal, the door is opened for a great deal of truths about America to be unveiled too.

Contains the following tropes

• Big Brother Instinct: Turkey and Albania have no hesitations fighting Serbia or even Russia if Kosovo is insulted.
• Big, Screwed-Up Family: So America has a lot of Native siblings who rather justificably hate the Europeans, half a hundred kids constantly squabbling with each other and suffering from various quirks and mental illnesses, and he used to be married to the Confederacy.
  • The Europeans are potentially related to each other, something that upset them a lot since it means they would have to call family people they cannot stand — just look at England and France.
• Cain and Abel: When you have half a hundred siblings, you will seek to murder some of them, that's kinda impossible to avoid.
• Chocolate Baby: Nation genetics can be pretty weird, and several of America's children closely look like European Nations such as Prussia and Belgium courtesy of their immigrants strongly influencing them.
• Disappeared Dad:
  • Scandia — the progenitor to the Nordic Nations — had a fling with First Nation and left before anyone except for Iceland could learn he had sired America and Canada.
  • France is rather anguished to learn he was one to the Territory of Louisiana, as he had no idea whatsoever she existed and missed her wedding and her becoming a mother as a consequence, learning of her only decades after her demise.
  • None of the United Kingdom siblings is able to peg a father for themselves or the others — Britannia really enjoyed cavorting around.
• Doting Grandparent:
  • From a technical viewpoint, France is this to America's states since their mother and stepmother was his former colony of Louisiana. It's played at his most straight with the current Louisiana, the former one's eldest daughter, as he constantly fawns over her being a beautiful, elegant young lady who puts her foes down in style.
  • America doesn't want to introduce his grandson West British Florida to his brother England because the European Nation would go gaga over the kid. Sure enough, when it happens, England immediately hugs the micronation with all his might.
• Doting Parent: America is nothing but a proud papa to his questionably sane offspring.
• Embarrassing Middle Name:
  • America's eldest sons, Connecticut and Massachusetts, also known as Thomas Job-raked-out-of-the-ashes Jones and John If-Christ-had-not-died-for-thee-thou-hadst-been-damned Jones. To be fair, America was fairly sleep-deprived at the time and it forced Puritan memories at the forefront of his mind.
  • England and Russia are very critical of a father calling his daughter Dorothy Exodus Jones, only for Kansas to tearfully reveal she picked the name herself. Cue awkwardness in the room.
• Everyone Has Standards: Several European Nations are stunned to learn just how many childen America has produced. Two or three are alright, but fifty are really a lot.
• Freudian Excuse:
  • The Thirteen Colonies are deeply hostile towards England for waging war against their father America and hurting their lands — they felt every bit of it and they were young children at the time.
  • The Native tribes as a rule loathe the former colonial empires who drove their people away from their ancestral lands, reduced them to poverty, exposed them to diseases and stole their youngest brothers America and Canada to brainwash them into hating their older siblings.
  • Nobody was aware of the Territory of Louisiana having a personification, so she was left on her own until she met America. It made her deeply clingy and paranoid about foreign influences stealing him away.
• Hated by All: The North American states and Native tribes loathe England for being a powerful colonial empire that caused a lot of misery for their people out of greed. It's so bad that he genuinely fears for his life when invited to celebrate Thanksgiving, since they will be in attendance and able to hurt him.
• Hidden Depths: Before they learned of his children's existence, other Nations saw America as helplessly goofy and lacking in responsability. Seeing him interact with the states show he actually can be quite serious and is hiding heavy baggage regarding his failed marriage.
• Honorary Uncle:
  • How the states tend to interact with Nations whose immigrants left a deep influence on their culture.
  • America's Founding Fathers also were rather doting towards his children, especially when said child personified their birth state.
• Immortal Procreation Clause: Nations reproducing tend to depend on the potential for a culture to develop into something new rather than sex. Before America's children were revealed to the world, the mainstream opinion was that Nations were infertile.
• Immortals Fear Death: Part of the reason why the Confederacy became so ruthless was how precarious her existence was, since she was constantly redefining herself, and she hated that.
• Incurable Cough of Death: China is shown sneezing a lot in the latest chapters. He staunchly insists he merely suffers from allergies, but the events in the story are unfolding in 2019, meaning he's in the early stages of COVID-19.
• I Never Got Any Letters: England and Canada tried to reconcile with America, only for his wife to intercept the mail and burn it as she was paranoid about them hurting him and the children again.
• Internalized Categorism: As the Confederacy was growing as a distinct culture, she started to resent several of his biological children for showing African features — something they got from her, since she used to be the Territory of Louisiana, a melting pot of Natives, Blacks and Europeans, and appeared having mixed ancestry as a consequence.
• Knight of Cerebus: When the matter of America's late wife is on the table, the narrative quickly loses any hint of humor.
• Last of Its Kind: China used to have several siblings until the Qin dynasty threw the basis for a unified country, with his brothers and sisters choosing to dissolve and never reincarnate while he was left the only Ancient Chinese Nation.
• Long-Lost Relative:
  • The North American twins to the Nordics, since they share a progenitor. Iceland was the only one to be aware of the relationship for a long time.
  • Turns out that the Confederacy formerly was the Territory of Louisiana, a French colony sold to America. France is horror-struck when he learns he unwittingly neglected and sold his own daughter.
• Maligned Mixed Marriage: From the very beginning, several deputees were wary of America's new bride, but John Adams openly calls her a "Creole strumpet". And when he learns of her, England immediately despises Louise for her French ancestry.
• Massive Numbered Siblings: Really, America? Fifty children? Other Nations are very much aghast in front of how many states he raised.
  • He's taking after his mom, First Nation — there's at least five hundreds seventy-four Native tribes on American land, and they have their own personifications.
• Meaningful Name:
  • Louise Annette Dubois, formerly the Territory of Louisiana.
  • America's Founding Fathers suggested for his firstborn daughter's human alias to be "Athena", since he was a Truly Single Parent to her. America seriously considers it before arguing he might have more daughters in the future and he's not giving them all the same name.
• Missing Mom:
  • First Nation used to be the personification of North America before she gave birth to her youngest children, the twins who later became Canada and the United States. And when a Nation produce a child to replace them, they start to decline...
  • The Confederacy to America's children. They generally avoid to speak about her, since she's a major cause for dissension in the family.
  • Saami to the Nordic Nations. They hesitate before trying to reconnect with her, since their governments are pretty racist towards her people, but she reassures them that she can tell the difference between her sons and the people who hurt her.
  • Japan has extremely blurry memories of his mother dating from before the Yayoi period and isn't holding hope for her to be still alive in the modern era. Word of God identified her as the Ainu culture.
• Obnoxious In-Laws: America's wife was deeply hostile by the prospect of meeting his siblings England and Canada, encouraging him to mistrust them and secretly destroying the letters they tried to send. On England's side, he considers the Confederacy a manipulative witch unworthy of America's love — it's implied part of this comes from her being related to France.
• Parental Sexuality Squick:
  • England staunchly rejects his brother Scotland's confession that Britannia would enjoy cavorting around, outright assaulting his sibling and screaming he was a virgin birth.
  • A variant with France who doesn't care about his mother Gaul sharing his hedonistic tendances — what mortifies him is her having an affair with England's mother, leading him to lament her lack of discerning taste.
  • Plainly averted with Iowa when Taiwan draws yaoi porn about America and Russia having a steamy makeout session — hey, her dad didn't have a lot of luck with women, so that might be better for him to try his hand with a dude! Kosovo is appaled by her sheer nonchalance.
• Questionable Consent: The circumstances in which Texas and California were conceived — both America and Mexico were horrendously drunk at the time, to the point he completely blacked the night's events.
• Really Gets Around:
  • Subverted with America — you would think he's a genuine Casanova since he produced fifty children, but he only slept with two partners and was faithful to his wife for sixty decades.
  • Britannia, to England's utter horror.
• Secret-Keeper: Iceland for Canada and America's half-Nordic parentage. He's pretty anxious about revealing his knowledge, until he cannot go anymore — fortunately, the Nordics are more dismayed about the fact they never took him seriously when he tried to tell them about another continent.
• Stacy's Mom: Nevada is mother to the micronation Molossia and acknowledged as very beautiful, to the point that Seborga tries hitting on her.
• Tangled Family Tree: Oh boy! So you have European Nations considering themselves godparents or Honorary Uncle to the states they influenced through immigration, the North American twins being half-Nordic through their father, the Ancient European Nations screwing each other a lot — yes, in both senses — and making everyone more or less related...
• This Is Gonna Suck: America insists his idea of inviting all the Nations for a corporate camping retreat is going to be a success. Considering all the historical and current animosity between everyone, his children are not as enthusiastic.
• Throw the Dog a Bone: England is very much Hated by All in North America, something that distresses him even if his Stiff Upper Lip won't let him admit it. So his reaction when introduced to West British Florida — a micronation striving to join the British Commonwealth — is to immediately grab the boy in a bone-crushing embrace.
• Truly Single Parent: The Thirteen Colonies were born in the same way that Zeus sired Athena — America was pretty chuffed about becoming a dad, but he found the process quite painful.
• Wacky Parent, Serious Child: Zigzagged regarding America who's his cheery, goofy and slightly Cloud Cuckoo Lander self, but is able to be pretty serious and whose children can be just as insane as him, when they are not suffering from genuine mental illness.
• We Used to Be Friends:
  • Russia and America were penpals and enjoyed it immensely, until Russia went communist. Their relationship is still rather tense in the modern era.
  • After the Second World War, Japan basically is persona non grata for the other Asian countries. He acknowledges he fully deserves it.
• What Could Have Been: In-Universe.
  • Following the reveal that America and Canada are Scandia's children, the Nordics briefly ponder over the possibility of their countries raising the North American twins and forging alliances with the Native tribes against the European colonial empires.
  • A depressed France laments he never got to care for the Territory of Louisiana, but muses it might have been for the best considering his track records with his former colonies — who hate his guts out, so there's no guarantee of a timeline in which raising Louise Annette would have turned out well.
• Yoko Oh No: America's children are happy to fling a heap of scorn on his late wife, holding her responsible for the Civil War in spite of America's protests that the situation was a great deal more complicated. Her reputation worsens when she's revealed to have contributed to America's isolation and estrangement from his family, leading England to blame the "half-French slattern" for stealing his adopted brother.
• You Didn't Ask: The reason why the states' existence wasn't publically known until very recently.

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