Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Greg Becomes An Orphan is a fanfic of Diary of a Wimpy Kid in an L.L.B. (Looks Like Books) style created by u/Z5p4rk31z642 on r/LodedDiper.
It begins with Greg learning that his family is in fact a Satanic cult and have sacrificed Rowley. Rodrick then cripples Greg's legs and when he comes to, he finds out that his whole family has killed themselves, leaving him the sole Heffley. With no legs and no family, what's Greg to do out in the world?
It only gets crazier from here.
- Adaptational Villainy:
- Greg was an ass in the original books, but he would never be an outright murderer.
- Manny is even more psychotic here than he ever was in the books, going on a homicidal rage, and attempting to kill his own brother. This might have come from brain damage.
- Asshole Victim: No tears will be shed for Manny, considering what a psychotic little shit he was.
- Ax-Crazy: Turns out the Heffleys, Rowley, Chirag, and Fregley didn't actually die from unrelated deaths. Greg murdered them all, though he states Rowley's death was an accident. He also murders another kid named Timothy at the orphanage for saying he was adopted and giving him a black eye. He later burns down the first orphanage he came to, with everyone dead. Manny also counts, considering he randomly shanks a kid with a scalpel when he arrives at the second orphanage and goes on a shooting spree over crust on his PB&J sandwich.
- Black Comedy: This fic runs on this, mixed with a generous amount of Surreal Humor.
- Black Comedy Rape: Chirag got the Cheese Touch through being molested by Uncle Gary, who in turn got it from his toddler nephew.
- Crack Fic: While the original books weren't exactly realistic, this fic takes the absurdity up a few notches. For example, Chirag kills his family for subscribing to T-Series instead of PewDiePie.
- Disproportionate Retribution:
- Chirag murdered his parents when he found out they were subscribed to T-Series instead of PewDiePie.
- Greg also smothers Timothy to death for a "You're adopted" joke and giving him a black eye.
- And Manny goes on a shooting spree because he wanted the crust off his PB&J sandwich and wants to kill everyone because no one taught him how to tie his shoes.
- Driven to Suicide: Chirag hangs himself. Subverted, as Greg later admits to killing him.
- Enfant Terrible: Manny was already this in the source books, but here, he's outright homicidal, brutally murdering people in his tantrums.
- Even Evil Has Loved Ones: Greg states that Rowley was his only unintended victim, and his last diary entry before he dies is saying he loves his best friend.
- Eye Scream: Manny stabs one of Greg's eyes out. He's not happy he now looks like a pirate. Greg later returns the favor with a spoon.
- Foreshadowing: When Greg gets arrested for burning down the first orphanage, note how he mentions "I can't believe this I was so careful", indicating there's more to the story that Greg is refusing to tell in his diary.
- Another example is when he gets out of the hospital for the third time to go to another orphanage, there's a crossed out bit of writing from Greg that says "Time to bomb the fuck out of another orphanage."
- I Just Want to Be Special: All Greg wants to be is someone famous. Going down as one of the evilest serial killers isn't his preferred option, but he'll take it.
- It's All About Me: As per usual, Greg. He only looks out for his comfort and safety and ignores the violence that goes on around him.
- Last Stand: Greg knows he's dying from the Cheese Touch and that the cops are coming after his head, but decides to go out with guns blazing and blood spraying. However, he survives, where he succumbs to the Cheese Touch in the hospital with no company except the cops supervising him.
- Mythology Gag: Greg mentions he wants Zachary Gordon to play him.
- Pædo Hunt: Chirag got the Cheese Touch from being molested by Uncle Gary, which he got from his three-year old nephew. He's taken to jail for this.
- The Plague: The Cheese Touch is upgraded to an outright terminal and contagious disease here. Greg gets it from Chirag and is slowly dying throughout the story because of it.
- Sadist: Greg notes that he usually finds a kid's skull getting bashed in "entertaining", but he can't enjoy it anymore because it brings up memories of Rodrick crippling him.
- Self-Made Orphan: Chirag killed his parents, and it's revealed Greg did so as well.
- Serial Killer: Greg has a problem of murdering anybody who pisses him off, and it's later revealed he's killed a lot more people. He even states he's going to go down as one of the "best serial killers", which, while not what he envisioned, he's fine with.
- Surreal Humor: The plot is essentially a string of bizarre events, and it's all the funnier because of it.
- Take That!: Chirag's parents were subscribed to T-Series instead of PewDiePie, which meant they needed to die by their son's hands.
- The Reveal: In one of the final entries where Greg reveals the police have an arrest warrant after him, he reveals that he murdered more people than Timothy and Manny, he murdered his whole family, Rowley, Chirag and even Fregley
- Tempting Fate: Greg states that things can only get better at the second orphanage he goes to. The next entry is then him getting arrested for burning down the first orphanage. Then the entry after that is how he won the court case and things are looking up for him. Then the entry after that involves him getting stabbed and robbed.
- Vorpal Pillow: Greg smothers Timothy, Nybe, and Manny to death with a pillow. According to
Word of God, it's his favorite way of murder.
