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A work-in-progress from Hysterium Productions, Already Been Chewed News is a news-show satire presented as live with no political commentary, instead focusing more on the characters (the show's crew). The pilot, which is almost done, filmed on a shoestring budget and (unfortunately) looks it.

The characters:

  • The anchorman and showrunner is Seth Leonardson, who is constantly frustrated with his staff, who is largely unequipped to report the news or be on television in general. He thinks he's the Only Sane Employee, but in practice is more of a Cloud Cuckoo Lander.
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  • His main field reporter is Jenkins, who is ever timid, eager-to-please and battling stage fright.
  • The other reporter is Nicholas Calixtro, an overconfident Large Ham and former Shakespearean actor whose stories are often insignificant. The first episode implies his overacting is compulsive.
  • Danae Patelington, the world news reporter, is a British pop-star burn-out who sees her job as beneath her and often goes on tangents or answers her phone in the middle of a segment.
  • Former Sargent Lilo Garcia, a war correspondent who is so far behind the times he landed in Vietnam instead of Iraq because he thought the former war was still going on. The series sole story arc is his attempt to reach Iraq.
  • Mae Alon is the resident interviewer and debate moderator, a bipolar woman who used to be a sunny morning talk show host.
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  • Rounding out the cast is Sunny Daze, an incompetent meteorologist who tries his hardest but obviously has no idea what he's doing.
  • And occasionally chiming in with a quick snark is Rebecca, whose job is less that of a director and more to keep everyone from going batshit insane.

And then there's the producer, Earnest, who is occasionally comes up with new ways to make the show more appealing and pull in more money. He seems to legitimately care about the program, but unfortunately interrupts the live broadcast to introduced his newest Zany Scheme or lament its failure.



  • Captain Obvious: Sunny Daze, on occasion, made funnier by the fact that it takes him forever to draw conclusions like "It's cloudy."
  • The Danza: Seth Leonardson, and formally Ted Pickel. Plans to make this Theme Naming fell through.
  • Department of Redundancy Department: "Hello, this is Seth Leonardson reporting live for Already Been Chewed News. This is Already Been Chewed News".
  • Development Gag: A hurricane of them pop up early on, mostly in name drops. A noticeable one is given to Ted Pickel, a character from an early version of the pilot whose actor didn't so much quit as he did kind of slipped off the show. His character type was filled by another actor playing Calixtro.
  • Does Not Like Men: Mae. She gets an entire rant about it. In spite of her sesquipedalian word choice, her distaste seems to be on a level atkin to a gender-flipped Boys Have Cooties.
  • G-Rated Drug: Coffee for Danae; also, whatever Sunny's taking.
  • Public Service Announcement: "It's 8 P.M. Do you know where your parents are?"
  • The Ghost: Dusty Rhodes, the traffic reporter; Danae's boyfriend.
  • Is This Thing Still On??: The "at-the-beginning" variant, crossed with Couch Gag. Seth never seems to notice when the show started, and will carry on doing whatever deranged thing he was doing until informed that the show is starting.
  • Malaproper: "Fig Newtons of our indigestion?"
  • Mood-Swinger: Seth, between frantic and deadpan; Mae, between sweet and abusive.
  • My Beloved Smother: A monster in a closet has one of these.
  • Name's the Same:
  • Real Life Writes the Plot: ABCN's incredibly low-budget was written into the narrative.
  • Recycled Set: Early versions of the pilot were filmed in a single small bedroom, which was shot at different angles for different segments. The newer version is being shot in a single, small office, which is lampshaded indirectly by showing people walking in and out and taking each other's places at the single desk and changing the nameplate.
  • Right Behind Me: Seth tries to pull this on Mae during her Does Not Like Men rant. In spite of—or perhaps because of—him making his presence known over the course of the rant, she just keeps going.
    Seth: This is the part where you say "there's one right behind me, isn't there?"!
  • Shout-Out: Earnest Leslie Price is named for Les Lye (who's middle name was Earnest) and Roger Price.
  • Sound-Effect Bleep: Static cuts in conveniently to cover one instance of "shit". A particularly profanity-laden tirade from Seth is covered up by Rebecca saying "bleep" over the dirty bits.
  • You Look Familiar: One actor plays three different roles in the first episode alone.


Example of: