Unpublished original story by Zazie122, who wrote this when they were 15 and thought they were funny.
The story centers around the completely normal Honda Kyouya, a 17 year old boy who moves with his parents, Tomoyo and Ken, to their hometown. They start off living with Ken's dad, who is letting many other people stay with him. Soon after, they meet with two of Ken's relatives, Akane and Shigeaki, who offer them a place at their house. Kyouya enrolls in the prestigious Hagizawa Academy. Of course, in his class, there's a certain girl, Saitou Hikaru, who is a stoic genius. Turns out that she's the middle daughter of Akane and Shigeaki.
Other main characters include Class Representative Kiritani Ayaka, Otaku Ueda Yuusuke and Hikaru's colorful sisters Hoshimi and Hotaru.
Jealousy, wackyness and hilarity ensue between Kyouya and the others.
Class 12 C Register
- Jerkass Akasaka Osamu
- Normal girl Godo Mami
- Chaste Hero Honda Kyouya
- Cheerful Child Ijima Kotone
- Fangirl Kawakami Chika
- Meganekko Kitao Haruna
- Tsundere Kiritani Ayaka
- Captain Obvious Lin Chao
- Odango Hair Lin Xiu
- Daddy's Girl Miyata Reina
- Miko Moriguchi Tsubaki
- Muggle Nijou Arata
- Genki Girl Ooka Aimi
- The Stoic Saitou Hikaru
- Grumpy Sakuramoto Horishi
- Otaku Ueda Yuusuke
- Soccer freak Watari Ichiro
Class 5 B Register
- Fukuzawa Takashi
- Hiyama Keiko
- Ishida Ryou
- Kimura Akira
- Kobayashi Fuuko
- Kobayashi Miitsu
- Kobayashi Youko
- Komine Fukami
- Kumoda Umiko
- Minami Noa
- Numajiri Makoto
- Saitou Hotaru
- Saitou Manami
- Sakai Haruki
- Watanabe Taiyou
[[folder: Class 16D Register]]
- Deguchi Tomomi
- Etsuko Nobuyuki
- Fujimatsu Setsuna
- Itou Momoha
- Koizumi Reika
- Kugimiya Shise
- Kugimiya Yukiko
- Murasaki Sachiko
- Noto Erina
- Osaragi Daisuke
- Ryuusaki Naoki
- Saitou Hoshimi
- Shibuki Masaru
- Shimagi Kanako
- Shiomiya Ayumu
- Takano Hibiki
- Tsujimura Hiroto
- Umehara Koua
- Yamakage Kaitou
Class 13 A Register
- Asou Hirose
- Arakawa Genpachi
- Ariki Ageho
- Barae Daichi
- Bunya Narumiko
- Chikafuji Goro
- Daijou Ichizo
- Hattori Utamara
- Hitsujino Seiya
- Inoue Jessica
- Irie Zeshin
- Kanno Yasuo
- Kim So Yong
- Kyotsuki Seiji
- Mizuda Suzaku
- Ooba Kingo
- Rakaji Nozomi
- Saitou Haruka
- Suzanne De Vent
- Tsukamoto Sae
- Ueto Kazuki
- Yamato Misa
- Yajida Maika
Tropes
- Alliterative Name: Saitou Shigeaki, Minami Misaki, Koizumi Kaoru, Murasaki Michiyo, Shibuki Sakuya, Mimiyo Mimino...
- All Men Are Perverts: Hotaru believes this.
- All of the Other Reindeer: Kotone.
- Annoying Younger Sibling: Noto Mika.
- Apologises a Lot: Hikaru.
- Arranged Marriage: Itsu-nee. The Kobayashi Triplets attempt to hijack it.
- Badass Bookworm: Hotaru.
- Badass Family: The Saitou family. Except when broken, then they're pretty useless.
- Little Miss Badass: Moriguchi Tsubaki.
- Badass Longcoat: Shimagi Kana.
- Beach Episode: A couple; one on the class trip.
- Berserk Button: "Wait, why is the Kyou part written as—" "I DON'T KNOW, SHUT UP!"
- Beware the Nice Ones: Asuka.
- Big Eater: Chika.
- Big Fancy House: The Saitou Estate. Also, Moriguchi's house.
- Big, Screwed-Up Family: The Saitou family.
- Book Dumb: Akasaka.
- Boy Meets Girl: Kyouya meets Hikaru.
- Break the Cutie: Hikaru, kinda.
- Broke Episode: The first one.
- Buttmonkey - Mainly Kyouya.
- But I Can't Be Pregnant!: Akane.
- But We Used a Condom!: Akane & Shigeaki.
- Calling Your Attacks: Yuusuke spends a day doing this with completely normal tasks. "ULTIMATE ERASER ATTACK!" and "EATING A RICEBALL PUNCH" are two.
- Cannot Spit It Out - Kyouya.
- Can't Have Sex, Ever - Hikaru has extremely frail health that apparently runs in the family.
- Captain Obvious - Chao.
- Chaste Hero - Kyouya.
- Cherry Blossoms: Sakuramoto hates being called "Sakura-chan", yet Yuusuke parodies his name to no end.
- Chick Magnet: Kyouya, much to Yuusuke's disappointment.
- Class Representative - Ayaka. Also Hoshimi and Makoto. Jessica too.
- Class Trip: To Okinawa. Only because Yuusuke thinks that Kyoto and Nara are too cliche. Shigeaki and Akane pay for the trip.
- Clingy Jealous Girl: Miyata Reina.
- Cloudcuckoolander: Ooka Aimi.
- The Comically Serious: Various characters are srs bsns.
- Cool Big Sis: Saitou Hoshimi. Subverted later on when she's pretty much a loser.
- Cosplay Otaku Girl: Chika.
- Crossdresser: Kyouya — against his will. Ayaka is pretty sure he enjoys it.
- Cute Mute: Saitou Hikaru, who spends most of her time being silent.
- Daddy's Girl - Reina.
- Deadpan Snarker: Hotaru, who is also a Little Miss Snarker.
- Dead Guy Junior: Kyouya is named after his grandparents, Haruka is named after her father, Yukiko is named after her uncle Yuuki and Shise's name is a combination of Shigeaki and Hirose, Atsuko's best friends.
- Different for Girls: "You're a GUY, how would you know!?"
- The Ditz - Yuusuke is really, REALLY stupid.
- Does Not Like Men - Fujimatsu Setsuna.
- Don't Answer That: "By the way that WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION."
- Doujinshi - Chika, Haruna and Aimi are part of the circle "A Thousand Springs Of Love".
- Dramatic Wind: "UEDA, STOP PLAYING WITH THE FAN!" "Awww?"
- Dude, Where's My Reward?: "I HELPED TOO!"
- Dumb Blonde: Momoha — although her hair is dyed. Suzanne is a subversion, she's actually pretty smart.
- Dumbass Has a Point: "Ueda's right about this though." "...." "I know, that sounded as painful to you as it did to me."
- Early-Bird Cameo - Ayaka
- Elaborate University High - The entire school.
- Elegant Gothic Lolita - Tsubaki.
- Embarrassing First Name - Kyouya hates his name because the Kyou part is feminine.
- Emotionless Girl - Tsubaki, again. Hotaru seems like this until later on in the series.
- Even the Girls Want Her - Hoshimi.
- Everyone Went to School Together: Kyouya's parents, Ayaka's dad, Haruka's dad, Menno and others.
- Evil Matriarch: Rika, Akane's mother. Subverted later when Akane is in the hospital and doesn't remember who Rika is. Rika then (awkwardly) acts like a mother to Akane for the first time since she was a child.
- Fangirl - Noto Erina, Kawakami Chika.
- Festival Episode: The summer festival. "I love them! They're an excuse to wear yukata!"
- Forehead of Doom: Haruna.
- Forgettable Character: Akane never remembers Yuuki's friend Keiichi.
- Forgotten Birthday: Hotaru. Amongst the midst of all that's happening, her parents forget her 13th birthday... Not that she blames them, mind you.
- Four-Girl Ensemble: Hoshimi, Kana, Setsuna, Momoha.
- French Jerk: "Nah, I'm not a jerk. I'm not even French." "You're Canadian... Canadians are part French... so you're part jerk?"
- Friend to All Living Things: Ijima Kotone, Ishida Ryou.
- Genki Girl: Kobayashi Youko, Ijima Kotone amongst others.
- Genre Shift: Goes from comedy to drama and stays at one. Occasionally may result in Mood Whiplash.
- Good with Numbers: Hikaru.
- Happily Married: Tomoyo and Ken.
- Heavy Sleeper: Yuuki. Also Yuusuke, who HATES mornings.
- Hero-Worshipper: Yuusuke accuses Hotaru of secretly adoring Kyouya. Yuusuke regrets it.
- Heroic Wannabe: Yuusuke.
- Heterosexual Life-Partners: Tamiko and Kotone.
- Hidden Heart of Gold: Yuusuke.
- Hollywood Tone-Deaf: Ayaka.
- Honor Before Reason: Hikaru.
- Huge Guy, Tiny Girl: Shigeaki & Akane.
- Huge Schoolgirl: Tamiko is really tall, although her measurements are normal.
- Humans Are Bastards: Hotaru despises all humans, even herself.
- I Always Wanted to Say That: "You've been working on that one, haven't you?" "DAMMIT!"
- Idiots Cannot Catch Colds: Subverted, Yuusuke catches the flu during the winter and is extremely ill to the point where he cannot play eroge.
- Incorruptible Pure Pureness: Hikaru.
- Insistent Terminology: Yuusuke and his otaku terms.
- I Want My Beloved to Be Happy: Shiomiya Ayumu.
- Jerkass: Akasaka and Yuusuke, to an extent.
- Jerk with a Heart of Gold: Kyouya. Yuusuke as well, but he's more of a jerk.
- Journey to Find Oneself: Akira.
- Kiai: Yuusuke tries coming up with different ones.
- Kids Are Cruel: Hotaru.
- Keet: Fukuzawa Takashi.
- Kendo Team Captain: Hotaru.
- Law of Inverse Fertility: Tomoyo's friend Sayaka cannot have children, even though she wants to.
- Large Ham: Yuusuke parodies this. Shigeaki is more of a straight example. Sort of.
- Like Brother and Sister: Yuusuke and Ayaka.
- Littlest Cancer Patient: Yamaoka Aya, Asuka's sister.
- Lucky Charms Title: Yuusuke suggests many of these. They're all regected.
- Ma'am Shock: Akane hates being called Oba-san.
- Mama Bear: Itou Sae, Honda Tomoyo, Saitou Akane (only when in the right state of mind).
- Mathematician's Answer: Hikaru.
- Men Don't Cry: Ueda Yuusuke, Akasaka Osamu, amongst others.
- Miko: Moriguchi Tsubaki.
- Momma's Boy: Kyouya, though he tries to get over it.
- Morning Sickness: Akane.
- Multigenerational Household: Rika (grandma), Shigeaki and Akane (parents), Hoshimi, Hikaru and Hotaru (children).
- Multiple Reference Pun: Yuusuke loves these.
- My Beloved Smother: Tomoyo is very overprotective of Kyouya.
- My Kung-Fu Is Stronger Than Yours: Akira, in terms of kendo towards Hotaru.
- My Sister Is Off-Limits: Hotaru. She goes so far as to laying out a rulebook for Kyouya (and later gives a copy to Yuusuke) about what they cannot do to Hikaru. In vivid detail.
- Naked First Impression: Yuusuke walked in on Ayaka.
- Neat Freak: Ayaka. To the extreme.
- Necktie Leash: Akane uses this with Shigeaki.
- Nerd Glasses: Hotaru, only because her eyesight is really bad.
- Never Got to Say Goodbye: Takano with his mom.
- New Transfer Student: Honda Kyouya.
- The Nicknamer: Yuusuke.
- No Periods, Period: Subverted: Yuusuke asks Ayaka if she's so mad at him because it's her time of the month. Cue Yuusuke getting beaten up.
- No-Respect Guy: Yuusuke.
- No Sense of Direction: Haruka.
- No Social Skills: Hikaru is good at everything acedemic but fails when it comes to social things.
- Ojou: Hikaru and her sisters. The Kobayashi sisters, too. Also, Tsubaki.
- Older Than They Look: Ijima Kotone, Moriguchi Tsubaki.
- Onee-sama: Saitou Hoshimi.
- The Only One Allowed to Defeat You: Akira and Hotaru.
- Otaku: Yuusuke, Akasaka Osamu.
- Parental Abandonment: Tamiko, Kotone and Tsubaki.
- Pollyanna: Kotone. Although, it's only because she wants to keep a promise she made with her mother before she died. Truth is she's actually not that positive on the inside.
- Porn Stash: Yuusuke. He also looks for the stashes of all the other fathers he meets, too. Only Shigeaki has one, to his great disappointment.
- Practical Joke: Akasaka loves these.
- Puppy Love: Hotaru and Akira. Played with when they're ten, actually becomes canon later.
- "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Hotaru to Akane.
- Red Armband of Leadership: "You're the class rep, so you need this armband! Although red isn't your color..."
- Repetitive Name: Mimiyo Mimino.
- Reverse Psychology: Ayaka and Shigeaki both attempt this.
- Right Behind Me: "Don't tell me Ayaka-chan's behind me— OH HI AYAKA-CHAN!"
- Ring-Ring-CRUNCH!: Ayaka in the mornings.
- Romantic Runner-Up: Yuusuke, Akasaka.
- Saving the Orphanage ? The orphanage where Chao and Xiu are living is going to be shut down, until Kyouya and Ayaka find out that it is owned by the Saitou family. Akane and Shigeaki offer to give the orphanage the money it needs.
- Saying Sound Effects Out Loud: Atsuko, Yuuki's older brother, has a habit of doing this.
- School Festival: 12C do a restaurant with food from around the world.
- School Newspaper Newshound: Kitao Haruna, Deguchi Tomomi.
- Screw the Rules, I Have Money!: Hotaru, most of the time. Also, Shigeaki.
- Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Hikaru.
- Show Within a Show: "Mizuki-chan no Himitsu" is a game within a show.
- Shrinking Violet: Hikaru.
- Sibling Team: The Saitou sisters.
- Single-Minded Twins: Yukiko and Shise.
- The Stoic: Hikaru. Moreso Tsubaki.
- Student Council President: Inoue Jessica.
- Snow Means Death: Miki, Ayaka's mother.
- Sweet Tooth: Chika.
- Teacher/Student Romance: Seems this way with Yuuki and Ayaka, until Kyouya finds out that they're father and daughter.
- Theme Naming - Hoshimi, Hikaru and Hotaru's names all start with H.
- Third-Person Person: Reina is Reina.
- True Companions: "I'm okay, though. I have my friends. I can't let this get to me."
- Twin Switch: Yuusuke blackmails Xiu and Chao into doing this. Only some people work it out. Yukiko and Shise like to play around with this, just to confuse Kyouya.
- Two-Teacher School: Looks like it at first with Yuuki and Keiichi. Madgalene-sensei makes a couple of apperances and you eventually see most of the other teachers.
- Urban Legend Love Life: Yuusuke.
- Upper-Class Twit: Kobayashi Miitsu.
- Wacky Homeroom: Class 12C.
- "What Do They Fear?" Episode: Yuusuke tries to scare Hikaru. He fails, as Hikaru is apparently not scared of anything.
- Who Would Want to Watch Us?: Lampshaded when Kyouya asks "What the hell, who'd want to watch an anime about ordinary high school students?", to which Yuusuke responds "You'd be surprised."
- Word Salad Title: The series has nothing to do with crimes.
- Yaoi Fangirl: Kawakami Chika.
- You Watch Too Much X: Yuusuke watches too much anime.
- Yuri Fan: Yuusuke.
