GAME OVER: PRESS 'R' TO TRY AGAIN

It turns out that I am a junkie who inhabits a lightbulb joke gone horribly wrong, and my junkie friends fail to stop the room from spinning, only for me to fall off the ladder.

The next poster is pretending to be a potato to get away from a murderer.

My dumbass stays there for so long that I fail to notice the fire that's slowly brewing. Before I knew it, it was too late. I'm baked.

Tnp was the one who started the fire

It was always burnin' since the world's been turnin', and I become one of it's latest victims.

TNP went down to Georgia.

Unfortunately, so did the devil. I am tortured for all eternity with a fiddle until I die.

TNP is cackling like a supervillain and rubbing their hands together.

A superhero confuses me for a supervillian they kill me.

TNP is Joe

Edited by Playing_with_boy on Dec 22nd 2019 at 9:00:02 AM

Joe as in coffee. I am swallowed to the last drop.

The next poster committed the heinous sin of putting sugar in their coffee.

Edited by SkyCat32 on Dec 22nd 2019 at 11:51:16 AM

I have an undocumented case of diabetes. You know the rest.

TNP is working at the Burger Fool.

I decide that enough is enough and commit a murder-suicide with the manager.

TNP is in Kamurocho during what seems like the billionth gang war it has had since 1988.

I try to escape, only to trip over my shoelaces and impale myself with my katana, which I have been carrying unsheathed.

The next poster is self righteous because they drive a Prius.

Out of all the red Priuses that Carmen Sandiego could have stolen, she HAD to steal MINE. I chase after her, and when she realizes she can't out-speed a vampire running at Super-Speed, she pulls a Dodge by Braking stunt and then runs me over while I'm still disoriented. While my Healing Factor is still trying to repair my shattered ribcage and un-squash one Squashed Flat lung, she pulls out a knife, reaches inside me and literally steals my heart. And to add insult to injury, she leaves an orange peel from one of the oranges she stole from me earlier resting on my corpse.

The next poster is a superhero, and a supervillain starts in with the hostage taking and the taunting and the "Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are" monologuing.

My superpowers don't stop me from getting blended by a tornado on the way back home.

TNP is Santa Claus delivering presents to all the children in the world.

You've seen The Santa Clause, you know what happens when you walk of roofs!

TNP closes a window.

It's to try and stop a Herrscher from wrecking her shit, in a monumental case of Idiot Ball. Needless to say, a weak ass window does nothing to protect Himeko.

TNA is navigating a ship during a heavy storm.

The lightning cracks my boat in half, and I die.

TNP is a corncob.

I am dehydrated, then have my kernels removed and processed by Orville Redenbacher.

The next poster is 27 years old, and is the guitarist and vocalist for the Alternative & Punk band Vid Sicious.

Edited by SkyCat32 on Dec 27th 2019 at 8:01:11 AM

Vid Sicious decides that they are better off returning to the use of more ordinary techno instruments such as synthesizers and drum machines while producing instrumental tracks. They sell better that way, but I become superfluous, depressed, and commit suicide just before my 28th birthday.

The next poster is a Mary Sue character.

Because I am The Chosen One™, I end up pregnant with the child of a very important emperor. Said emperor is a Xenomorph. Fill in the blanks from there.

TNP is playing badminton.

I impale myself with the badminton.

TNP got the cheese touch

I use my power of lactokinesis to become a serial killer, only to be punched out when someone undoes my work.

The next poster just drank Boss Watermelon.

The watermelon literally is a boss, and punches my stomach so hard that my stomach bleeds. I die.

TNP is jumping.

I accidentally jump too high and get hit by an oncoming jet. My mangled corpse is found over a month later in a random cornfield in the middle of nowhere.

TNP is raking some leaves.

Edited by CustardAndPie on Dec 29th 2019 at 5:00:24 AM

I step on the rake and it gets driven into my head. I die from cranial fractures.

TNP is singing “Auld Lang Syne” in preparation for the new year.

"Should auld acquaintance be forgot for Auld Laaang S-" (the clock strikes twelve, and before I sing that note it flies towards me, turning me to a bloody paste that winds up spelling 2020)

TNP is playing football (whatever football it is is up to TNP)

Edited by GrafVonTirol on Dec 30th 2019 at 6:57:18 AM

Well, I shouldn't have played football with a bunch of aliens whose touch is dealy to humans.

The next poster just obtained Invincibility and Immortality.

I lose all of my loved ones and comrades, prompting me to search for a cure for both diseases. When this fails, I decide to burn the world to ashes. Thankfully for everyone, myself included, God strikes me with a lightning bolt before I can succeed.

The next poster is a spooky ass clown.

Edited by SkyCat32 on Apr 14th 2020 at 1:01:45 PM