I've been forging money. No more living on the edge of society for us. No more tick, no more nicking! No more running into off-licences and seeing how much we can drink before the police arrive!
The forgery episode. Eddie has been locked in his room for a week and Richie is getting suspicious. Turns out, Eddie has been printing fake money with pornographic images on them.
The two go to the pub with Spudgun and Hedgehog and try to buy drinks with the fake money. Dick takes one of the notes and calls local forger Skullcrusher Henderson to alert him of the competition. He then explains that they must pay Henderson £5000 compensation or he'll, you guessed it, crush their skulls. Eddie notices that Dick is holding a pub quiz with a prize of £5000. After the boys cheat their way to victory, Henderson arrives. As the prize money is also fake (the work of Henderson himself), he crushes their skulls.
Tropes
- All for Nothing. The boys enter the quiz to get the money they need to pay Henderson, but the prize money is forged anyway.
- All Men Are Perverts: A given with these guys. Eddie, who has created a load of fake pornographic money, throws his keys under the nurses' table in the pub so he can look up their skirts.
- Big "WHAT?!": When the boys find out how much it costs to enter the pub quiz.
- Bring Me My Brown Pants: Poor Dave Hedgehog when the lads are told that Skullcrusher is onto them and demands five grand.
- Breaking the Fourth Wall: Eddie gives us a cheery thumbs-up while banging Richie's head against the bar counter.
- The Con: Dick Head organises a quiz night in his pub with a cash prize of £5000; entry is £200 per person. However, the prize is actually counterfeit money. Given the number of teams taking part, Dick rakes in several thousand pounds in real money, and off-loads a wad of fake money as well.
- Counterfeit Cash: This doesn't work too well, since Eddie winds up creating triangular fake banknotes (he claims they're supposed to be Welsh), and others with random denominations (for example, a £27 note) and pornographically detailed portraits. In a brief moment of lucidity (or further insanity), Eddie claims that the pornographic notes are so lewd that barmen will be entranced with them long enough for him to get plastered. It seems to work on Dick, but he was really creating an excuse to go around the back and get on the phone to Skullcrusher, London's most prolific forger, to warn him that Eddie's trying to muscle in on his patch.
- Dumbass Has a Point: Played with. Richie is not wrong when he points out that, in the unlikely event of the Queen exposing some skin on the banknotes, she wouldn't get her jugs out for a low-denomination one like a fiver. But then, he has reckoned without Eddie's particular brand of insanity.Richie: She'd save 'em up for the fifty!
Eddie: Well, if you have a look at my fifty, I think you'll find it a mite more risqué.
[Eddie hands Richie one of his £50 notes. Richie looks at it, and is horrified]
Richie : God! Those are disgusting! Eddie, that's tantamount to treason! - Eye Scream: When Richie tries to peek through the keyhole of Eddie's bedroom to see what he's been up to for days, Eddie counters with the tip of a snooker cue.
- Filth: Eddie's banknotes depict members of the Royal family and various celebrities engaging in all manner of sexual acts.Richie: How can you expect to pass these pornographic doodles off as real money? [notices one of the other banknotes] Especially when you see what the Duke of Edinburgh's up to in the back of the tenner! Who's that with him?
Eddie: Meryl Streep.
Richie: [makes sex noises, then stops when he notices something] Hang on, she's got three knockers!
Eddie: No, that's Bobby Charlton in the middle. - Groin Attack: Taken up to eleven when Eddie uses a blowtorch on Richie.
- Hospital Hottie: Richie and Eddie get very excited about the fact that one of the other teams in the pub quiz is a group of nurses from the local hospital.
- Informed Ability: For all the talk of him being London's real Master Forger, it eventually turns out that Skullcrusher Henderson's banknotes aren't much better than Eddie's — the main difference is that he seems to prefer drag artists over porn. It is all but stated that his status as the top forger in London is entirely down to him using extreme violence to intimidate the competition.
- Insane Troll Logic: As stated above, Eddie believes that his forged money is so pornographic that it will stupefy the pub landlord to such a degree that they'll have enough time to get drunk and scarper.
- Like an Old Married Couple: Dave Hedgehog seems to think Eddie and Richie are this when he calls Richie "the wife".
- Literal-Minded. Hedgehog.Richie: What brings you round here?Hedgehog: The bus.
- Master Forger: Parodied. Eddie makes extremely unconvincing and highly pornographic banknotes, which results in him running afoul of Skullcrusher Henderson, London's real master counterfeiter — whose forged banknotes actually aren't much better than Eddie's, featuring drag artist Danny La Rue instead of the Queen note .
- Names to Run Away from Really Fast: Skullcrusher Henderson.
- Running Gag: Eddie breaking the fourth wall while smashing Richie's face in. Plus, the guys have to get past a load of barking dogs in order to enter the pub.
- Self-Plagiarism: This is not the first time some of these actors have been in a sitcom episode featuring a quiz that descends into disaster.
- Spit Take: When Richie necks some absinthe (actually Pernod, as the pub doesn't have any absinthe) without knowing what it is.Richie: This is shit! And they say Toulouse-Lautrec used to drink this? No wonder his legs fell off and all his paintings were crap!
- Take That!:
- On seeing Eddie's triangular banknotes (which are supposed to be Welsh banknotes), Richie points out that there is no Welsh money note prompting Spudgun to say: "No wonder they all vote Labour".
- Earlier Richie says he is so bored he could watch an episode of The Bill without vomiting blood, before stopping himself out of self-respect.
- Toilet Humor: In order to cheat in the pub quiz, Richie hides some encyclopaedias in a toilet cubicle and puts an "Out of Order" sign on the door. When he comes back, somebody is in the cubicle. Richie asks him if he didn't see the sign, and the man in the cubicle says he did but he was desperate. This is followed by a series of loud fart and diarrhoea sounds. The man also thinks the books are in fact "posh loo paper".
- Unusually Uninteresting Sight: When several quizzers are electrocuted and rendered unconscious thanks to Eddie having tampered with the buzzers, Dick ignores the carnage and carries in with the quiz.
