But the royals are just obsessed with, "Are you a royal family? Are you a royal member? Well, then you can marry me because you're same gene pool and our IQs will go down the toilet. Fantastico!"
Eddie Izzard, Dress to Kill
His Majesty Carlos II, king of Spain; duke of Milan, Lothier, Brabant, Limburg and Luxembourg; count of Flanders, Hainaut, and Namur; and count palatine of Burgundy, the anointed sovereign to whom the governor-general owed his sworn allegiance, was, not to put too fine a point on it, completely fucking useless. Indeed, he was so inbred that he could barely function as a human being, let alone as a king. Carlos II's ancestors had been marrying their close relations for so many generations that the scion of the line suffered from uncountable intellectual and physical disabilities, and indeed was technically his own cousin, his own cousin once removed, and his own second cousin. All his eight great grandparents were descendants of the same couple, and his mother had been his father's niece, making his grandmother also his aunt.
“The monarchists will kiss their sis”
—Jreg, "Every Extreme is on the Same Team"
Henry VIII: Mary, I'd like to introduce you to your 22 year old fully grown adult cousin [Charles V], and now, your future husband!
Mary: Eww, he looks inbred.
Henry: MARY! [beat] We're all inbred!
Mary: Eww, he looks inbred.
Henry: MARY! [beat] We're all inbred!
— OverSimplified, "Henry VIII"
"I would tell the Habsburgs to go screw themselves, but they beat me to the punch."
— Blue, Overly Sarcastic Productions
Thomas: The duke of Queensberry, your brother and your uncle, requests financial aid to recover from this year's drought.
Kyle: All three of them?
Thomas: Well, they're all the same person.
Kyle: All three of them?
Thomas: Well, they're all the same person.
— Door Monster, "CKIII: Holding Court"
