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Main Characters
The sole remaining master of the Armstrong Style, and the sworn enemy of Lisa. After he feels the eponymous pain of her resurrection, Brad sets out once again to put Lisa back in the ground. By force.
- Bag of Spilling: Played With. He technically knows all his moves from the beginning of the game, but thanks to his pain, lacks the max SP to actually use most of them without leveling up.
- Born as an Adult: Downplayed. In the flashback to Brad's childhood, it's revealed he looked exactly as he does as an adult, with the only difference being that he's child-sized.
- The Comically Serious: As in the original, though he's more blasé about it here.(in response to seeing someone explode someone else with a punch)Brad: That was uncalled for.
- Well-Intentioned Extremist: Brad was the one who caused the Flash here- and given his motivations for doing pretty much anything are "keep Lisa from doing evil," that would make him this.
The original creator of the Armstrong style. While he may be long dead, his remnants still hold power necessary to combat the rise of Lisa…
Brad and Lisa's father. An abusive, alcoholic, middle-aged- wait, no. THIS Marty Armstrong was a seemingly well adjusted father (if a bit obsessed with empty bottles) who ended up saddled with the duty of raising Lisa and Brad, and putting up with their abuse all the while.
- Russian Reversal: In the original game, he was a prime case of Abusive Parents. In this game, his supposed children are the ones abusing him.
An evil force of nature more than anything, she manifests herself as a child flying around on a noose. In addition to the men under her thrall, she also promised 1,000,000 disciples to whoever brings her Brad’s head.
- Game-Over Man: If you eat a game-over, the resulting screen says "LISA HAS WON" along with a uncannily detailed picture of her.
Party Members
- Ascended Extra: Many of the party members here were mere NPCs in the actual game, such as Morrace and Bob Friday.
A balloon tied to a rock. Brad deems it weak and decides to share some of his power with it. This ends up giving it both life and the ability to talk, joining you in gratitude.
- Animate Inanimate Object: As stated before, the entire reason it’s a party member is thanks to Brad’s power.
- I Owe You My Life: Quite literally, since he was created by Brad.
A practitioner of Necromancy, who uses the dark arts to support you and your party as well as harm your enemies.
- Big Damn Heroes: On the receiving end of it, as Brad burns the children harassing him to crisps.
- Powered by a Forsaken Child: Judging by the appearance of the ghosts he summons, the undead he uses to fight are the bodies and souls of the kids Brad killed.
- Red Mage: Can inflict enemies with status effects and can damage, and learns to summon allies and to revive fallen party members.
- You Shall Not Pass!: His ending slide depicts him doing this, in a way. He uses his necromancy powers to keep Lisa from escaping hell until the day he dies, allowing a reprieve from her evil.
A member of the Banana Splitz who has yet to banana split. He wants to travel the world before he does, and joins Brad's party so he can do just that.
- Driven to Suicide: His ultimate fate. His time with Brad traumatizes him so much that he splits. All of his atoms. The resulting nuclear explosion wipes Lisaland from the map.
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Genius Bonus: His ending slide is very subtly foreshadowed by the fact that bananas are slightly radioactive. - Stance System: An interesting example- he switches between two different sets of moves by tearing his skin off and growing it back.
- Verbal Tic: Has a habit of saying "buddy," repeating what he said before that, then saying "pal."Plantain Guido: Heh, don't mind if I do, buddy, don't mind if I do, pal!
- I don't really care.
A man created by Lisa by combining her own power with Brad's power- a fact that disgusts him. After being sent to kill Brad, he immediately turns coat because of this.
- Bloody Murder: He has a couple skills involving this, where he uses fists made of blood, or drowns his foes in blood.
- Cast from Hit Points: All of his skills except one cost some of his HP- the one that doesn't, Armstrong Kiss, heals him completely in exchange for some HP from one of his allies.
- I'm Melting!: When Lisa is slain, he dissolves into goop as his existence depends on her power, as shown in his ending slide.
Other Characters
Lisa’s main enforcer, and master of hanging style.
A green man with a creepy face, who doesn’t seem to have the best social skills. Thankfully, he at least knows better than to mess with Brad.
The Hintlord himself. After a chance encounter with Brad, he ends up getting an obsession with him, sending his disciples to harass Brad.
One of Brad’s past bullying victims, he’s come for revenge to claim his role as protagonist of LISA: The Painful. Unfortunately for him, he seems to have misjudged his role in the story…
A creepy man with an outright uncanny manner around him, he seems to take an interest in Brad’s endeavors…
