A lively place, despite all the cadavers.
Covers beings to whom the Morgue is home.
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Dr. Everton Morteus Balmer
Even though Dr. Balmer is the one in charge of the Morgue, most information pertaining to him has been moved to Inert Sub-Concept Vessel MG-0908-BN/SK/HL-3900438093990, because that's where he was first and most frequently encountered, in-story.
Stone Slab
Checking in?
- Stone Slab: I dunno, the stiffs all look alike to us anyway. ...Like a paycheck! Haha!!
A cracked tombstone who looks after The Morgue. He’s one of the friendlier and more forthcoming individuals Fern meets, and is happy to put on some music and have a chat.
- Bizarre Alien Locomotion: He floats somehow, manifests an arm when he needs it, and is weirded out by the concept of legs.
- Blue-and-Orange Morality: As usual for the Hospital. His views of life and death are a bit off:Stone Slab: A body’s just a bunch of different stuff in one place, legs. All that changes is which parts eat and which parts get eaten.
- Does This Remind You of Anything?: A certain retro video game produced by Namco
, perchance? - Forgetful Jones: According to him, at least.
- Gallows Humor: As his quote shows. It probably comes easily when you don't have a neck or a concept of death.
- Go Through Me: To the "Revourer".
- Helpful Mook: He’s there to do his job and doesn’t much care to ask questions.Stone Slab: Stick to what you think is normal and you’ll be fine. For me, the Morgue is normal. We all belong to our own respective Class 9 autoperceptual omnimaterial repeating concept spirals...
- McJob: He gets one of these after The Morgue has a merger with Burgrr, Inc.
- The Little Shop That Wasn't There Yesterday: The first time Fern peeks inside the locked morgue's window, she sees a fairly conventional-looking morgue. By the time she returns with the morgue key, that room has been inexplicably replaced by Stone Slab's elevator.
- Rock Monster: A very non-monstrous version.
