Harry Potter's secret heartache? What's ailing you now?
Re: Arthur Weasley's eccentricities:
Molly Weasley: Your father thinks very highly of Mad-Eye Moody.
Fred Weasley: Yeah, well, Dad collects plugs, doesn't he?
Divination homework, doing a month's worth of self-predictions filled with every human misery possible. "You seem to be drowning twice." "Oh am I? ... I'd better change one of them to getting trampled by a rampaging hippogriff." Made even better by the fact that Professor Trewlaney loved it.
Made even better, when you realize that all of his made-up predictions come true (in a matter of speaking) during the course of the book.
Harry never got trampled by a rampaging hippogriff, though.
However, he did almost drown twice. Guess you don't get any points for redos.
Just after Harry opens the egg and it emits a horrible screeching noise: George: "I thought it sounded a bit like Percy singing. Maybe you've got to attack him while he's in the shower."
Hilariously so, he would be more or less right a year ago.
Dumbledore meets Rita Skeeter:
Skeeter: How are you? I hope you saw my piece over the summer about the International Confederation of Wizards' Conference?
Dumbledore: Enchantingly nasty. I particularly enjoyed your description of me as an obsolete dingbat.
Another case, where Harry and Dumbledore are trying to cheer up Hagrid after Skeeter writes about his being half-giant:
Harry: Really, you shouldn't worry about what that Skeeter cow- er, sorry Professor.
Dumbledore: I have gone temporarily deaf and have no idea what you just said, Harry.
Harry: Erm... right.
The old wizard Archie, who, attempting to pass as a Muggle, wears Muggle clothing... which, unfortunately, happens to be a nightgown.
Ministry wizard: Muggle women wear them, Archie, not the men, they wear these.
Archie: I'm not putting them on. I like a healthy breeze 'round my privates, thanks.
When Harry meets Percy at the Yule Ball and Percy mentions how he's been promoted "As if he were announcing his election as supreme ruler of the universe."
After Fred mentions the Yule Ball:
Ron: Who're you going with, then? Fred: Angelina. Ron: What? You've already asked her? Fred: Good point. (calling across the room) Oi! Angela! Angelina: What? Fred: Want to come to the ball with me? Angelina: All right, then. Fred:(to Harry and Ron) There you go, piece of cake.
Especially funny compared to Harry's agony over asking Cho.
From the film:
Daniel Radcliffe's very good at being hilariously blunt. A good example being the final scene, where it's sinking in to Hermione that Voldemort is back.
Hermione (close to tears): "Everything's going to change, isn't it?"
Harry: (puts his hand on her shoulder, then says "Yeah" in a completely blunt, unsympathetic tone)
Ron complaining about Krum: "Ruddy pumpkinhead!"
Also Ron coming in pale and shaking and looking like he's about to faint because 'He just asked Fleur Delacour out."
Also where Snape laments that its use on students is "regrettably forbidden."
In the studying scene, where Harry and Ron keep on getting caught talking by Snape and get their heads smacked by a book and forced down for their troubles.
The uber-annoyed look Snape gives and the precise manner in which he pulled up his sleeves before shoving their heads down was the icing on the funny cake.
