WMG / Thirty Hs

The music Harry plays when he "rocks the fuck out" is Level 13 on Mohs Scale of Rock and Metal Hardness

The page states that "Anything beyond 11 = Noise." This implies that there is, indeed, a Level 12, but none of the music noise that would be catagorized as such can be listed. What Harry plays on Fuckslayer is above this...so impossibly extreme that it manages to warp the universe even more, which is why the story gets even crazier after the second chapter. Throughout the story, music with hardness levels as high as 14 and even 15 are played, which is now possible because the limit to music hardness has been broken.

• Alternatively, Harry is either Karl Logan or Irrumator

The sound of Fuckslayer is SCP-1012 .

SCP-1012 is a chord that, should the frequencies it consists of be ever played for any amount of time, will eventually destroy all matter in existance down to the elemental particles. And what other sounds would someone like "Harry Potter" want for his guitar?

This story was actually written by one or more of the members of Dethklok, under an alias

Probably not one of the Scandinavians, unless it was a collaboration, since the author seems to have a better grasp of English than Skwis and Toki do.

• Given Skwis has expressed interest in Harry Potter before, he may have written this and then had Charles find a translator/editor for him. Perhaps he's Eloquent In His Native Tongue.

This story is true.

• If it is, my life now has meaning.

Thirty Hs takes place in Classical Mythology

When Harry "kills the fuck out of" Mercury and Venus, he is actually killing the gods Mercury and Venus. The sudden death of the goddess of beauty goes a long way towards explaining why every vagina in the galaxy explodes after that event.

This story can defeat Cthulhu

The insanity caused by this story's plot is so awesome, and so mind-warping, not even Cthulhu can face it. On a related note...

The book Harry's reading is the Necronomicon

Admit it, a book with pages made of lasers and letters made of headless women making godless love with dragons made of motorcycles would drive all but the unworthy mad. The author knows that's what the Necronomicon's like, because he read it shortly before writing this fanfic.

Rape Radbury is Slender Man

He's got the height, the lack of a face, the suit and the ability to appear out of nowhere. It's entirely possible Harry is capable of having reasonable conversations with Slendy because Harry simply can't become any more crazy. Additionally, the "critically acclaimed fiction that always turns into fact" is in fact his mythos, which originally he published as a series of novels before Self-Fulfilling Prophecy took over.

Rape Radbury wrote this fanfic.

Think about it- it says that everything he writes comes true, no questions asked. So if he wanted to write complete craziness, it'd still happen.

The story nearly triggered Spiral Nemesis.

That's the reason it ends abruptly after Harry spits the thumbwater at the old man. It got so mindbreakingly awesome, the universe couldn't handle it continuing. Either that, or Anti-Spirals just killed the author.

• Jossed; there's an eighth chapter after it now.

The Old Man who removes his head is inducting Harry into full godhood.

Harry has become such an obscenely powerful Physical God that he is captured by a mysterious Inquisition, and is then taken into a deep and fiery Hell to test his true physical strength. Upon emerging from the Hell, he is given a choice of creature that will undyingly serve him. Given Harry's nature, all the creatures are horrific mutants. The Old Man is the mighty god and creator of the universe, or else lives on an entirely separate plane of existence.

Fuckslayer has a mind of its own

And it's controlling all Harry's actions.

Wizard People, Dear Reader is the prequel to this.

Which would make Harry's attitude in the former much more explicable, as well as his godlike power.

The story is set in the Warhammer 40,000 universe.

Because It is the only possible setting matching this fanfic level of violence and sheer audacity.Harry and Dobby even sport a skull adorned space armor with GROINSAWS ATTACHED TO THEM.

• Continuing on this, maybe it was an Angry Marine's attempt at Fan Fiction? It would explain the groinsaws and "killing the fuck out of" things.

Fuckslayer contains The Music from Soul Music

Just as an above WMG suggests, maybe Fuckslayer is in control. Just like The Music from Soul Music. It overpowered Harry, but mutated, and thus making him evil.

This story is the fan fiction equivalent of Spiderland

The story and the album are very similar. They share the same unnerving, dark imagery, the same disjointed feel. And both seem to be contain separate stories dealing with insane events and people.

This story is entirely canon.

It was written by JK Rowling under an alias, and was there to show what would happen if Harry Potter decided to use his powers for unspeakable evil. She knew if she would publish it under her own name and publicly, she'd cause a public outroar, so she instead took the alias 'Secondpillow'.

Thirty Hs is the modern version of Naked Lunch.

Thirty Hs isn't even bad. It's actually good. Not even So Bad, It's Good, but genuinely good.

The person who made this is perfectly sane.

He's just so sane that he thought that he needed to dumb the story down cause he didn't think the populace would like one of his complicated stories.

The story takes place in the imagination of a bored Lowe's employee.

Y'know, kind of like how Ziltoid the Omniscient was inside the head of a bored Starbuck's employee. That explains the groinsaws, Voldemort hurling hardware store items, and some other things like that. I bet the next unofficial sequel ends with the employee being snapped out of the daydream by his local Jimmie Johnson cutout spewing confetti.

• Just gonna say, the hardware store bit came from an unofficial sequel that was intentionally bad and referencing "Weird Al" Yankovic.

Thirty Hs took place in the Panopticon Quest storyline, which in turn took place in the Mage: The Ascension universe.

Harry and his Darkmeal organisation are Nephandi at war with the Subjugation Corps during the earlier chapters.

Female rape apes (before they died out) had vulvas all over their bodies.

The only living rape ape is a male and he has penises on his body, so it would make sense for females to have vulvas on their bodies.

Rape apes are not rapists, they are the victim of rape

The Rape Ape in the story seems pretty sympathetic, so it's probably not a rapist. Instead, it and the rest of the rapeforest were raped by explorers, eventually leading to their extinction. It's not hard to see how animals literally covered in penises might end up being the victim of this.

The entire story is inspired by the author's dreams

It would explain the non-sensical and over the top nature of the fanfic, considering that all of it would make sense under dream logic.

This was written by some teenager attempting to be edgy.

Obviously.