Airdate: Monday, December 13, 2004
Sender: Fraser, Scotland
Strong Bad: (singing) I got miles and miles of the email style. Miles and miles of the email style!
Fraser has some friends who happen to be radio show hosts, and asks Strong Bad for any pointers for things they can say or do on their show, to which he agrees. According to Strong Bad, the first rule of being a radio personality is to make sure you sound nothing like how you look, as he demonstrates by making "Ol' Greystroke" act like a loud, obnoxious disc jockey known as "The Deathly Pallor".
Strong Sad: Hey hey hey, it's the Deathly Pallor, coming at you on numbitty 902, WA3D FM, "The Sturge." Coming up next, we got some hot new tracks from double-O ballyhoo! (claps his hands over his mouth, mortified, as Strong Bad laughs) Don't you ever make me do that again!
Strong Bad then demonstrates how various types of radio personality would say his test sentence: "The fish was delish and it made quite a dish":
- A "smooth 'n' smarmy" public radio announcer, who reports on the doings of Capitol Hill and the United Nations, and leaves Marzipan wondering when she's supposed to get her tote bag.
- Stoops and Gusso, the "AM Morning Crude Crew", a pair of smart-alecky "drive time morning show" hosts: "These guys are like bad stand up comics that you can't heckle. Or jeckle. Or throw highball glasses at." Which doesn't stop an annoyed Homestar from throwing a rocks glass at his radio. ("Alright, squawk box! Shut it up about that fish already!")
- College radio, which features a stuttering, mumbling "bewildered freshman" for a DJ, and which Strong Bad believes "can be summed up in five words: Dead air, um, dead air."
- Old-timey radio ("Just in case your friends are... um, in the past"), which features Old-Timey Strong Bad as the narrator for a thrilling radio drama, the "Fish Was Delish" program. "Stay tuned for partial excitement!"
Strong Bad: Done and done, Fraser. Your friends should be well on their way to annoying drivers and gas station attendants the world over. Ooh! And see if you can score me some free coozies, frisbees, or bottle openers from their station. Those free giveaways: highly flammable.
(The Paper comes down.)
(The Paper comes down.)
Tropes:
- Boring Broadcaster: As its slogan promises, the host on Public Radio Sounds is "Smooth 'n' Smarmy", as he reports on events at Capitol Hill and the United Nations. The station also distributes gifts such as bottle openers and tote bags to its supporters, such as Marzipan — who wondered why she had not received her tote bag yet (somehow, Homestar got it and was wearing it as a hat).
- Brick Joke: During the public radio segment, Marzipan mentions that she never got her tote bag from the station. Shortly afterwards, in the morning show segment, Homestar is wearing a tote bag from the public radio station on his head.
- Calling Your Attacks: Homestar shouts "High-ball!" while throwing a rocks glass at the radio.
- College Radio: Strong Bad does his best impression of a "bewildered freshman" while demonstrating what college radio is like."Uh... Campus Outreach is looking for... um... Hang on..."
- Continuity Nod: The college radio station is apparently "the voice of CGNU".
- Dead Air: Strong Bad sums up College Radio in five words: "Dead Air, 'um', Dead Air".
- Dumbass DJ: The AM Morning Crude Crew rely on bad jokes and obnoxious sound effects.Strong Bad: These guys are like bad stand-up comics that you can't heckle... or jeckle... or throw highball glasses at.
- Embarrassing Nickname: Strong Sad playfully addresses Strong Bad as "Senator", to which Strong Bad replies "Quit calling me that!"
- Everyone Has Standards: The AM Morning Crude Crew are so obnoxious even Homestar is infuriated by them.
- Incredibly Lame Fun: When the college radio station starts playing random, droning chants, Strong Sad starts recording them.
- Large Ham Radio: Strong Sad speaks in a hammy, motor-mouthed voice as "The Deathly Pallor".
- Our Slogan Is Terrible: Portly Washboy Laundry Paste: "Don't Eat It Like the Cartoon, Man!"
- Professional Voice Dissonance: According to Strong Bad, rule one of working in radio is to sound nothing like how you look. He somehow forces Strong Sad to talk in a Large Ham Radio voice to demonstrate.
- Shout-Out:
- Strong Bad refers to Strong Sad with the nickname "Ol' Greystoke".
- The narrator announcing Strong Bad's test sentence sounds a bit like the voice-over announcer from Password who announces each round's password to the audience.
- An Easter egg features a mock-cover for "The Fish Was Delish, and it Made Quite a Dish", a Dr. Seuss pastiche written by "Crazy Prof. Sportsinterviews".
- An Easter egg has Old-Timey Strong Bad borrow Dick Dastardly's catch-phrase "Drat and double-drat!"
- Sophisticated as Hell: When Strong Bad sees that the sender signed their email "Bowing to you".Strong Bad: Oh, no need to bow, Fraser. G-Get up. (reverently) Rise, my son. And giveth me instead, $7.50 with which to buy some buffalo chicken tenders.
- Two Words: Added Emphasis: Strong Bad remarks "College radio can pretty much be summed up in five words: Dead air, um, dead air."
- Vocal Dissonance: According to Strong Bad, "The first rule of thumb for all radio personalities is to look absolutely nothing like how they sound."
Strong Sad: (hanging in the TV room with Strong Mad) Oh, I disagree. I think it's more than just a matter of simple economics. In fact, I'd say... (suddenly goes into his radio announcer voice) Oh yeah! What's the phrase that pays that plays for days? It's numbity 902, "The Sturge"! Don't you touch that zabbitablah!
Strong Mad: (confused) ZABBITABLAH?
Strong Mad: (confused) ZABBITABLAH?
Old-Timey Strong Bad: (listening to himself on the radio) Drat and double-drat! It's true what they say! The rah-dio really does add four and twenty stone to one's voice!
