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Funny / Evolve

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  • Pretty much all of the funny comes from the clash of characters calling themselves hunters. Especially Abe. A lot of the time they're talking about very simple things before the hunt truly begins.
  • Hank likes to cook to get rid of the taste of their rations. Maggie complains that his grilled canyon eel was still alive when he served it. Val agrees it was pretty gross, or Slim will remark he's had worse. Both times Hank defensively says he never asked for anyone's "medical opinion."
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  • Crow was given a traditional Mongolian name, Khovalyg, by his parents as the first born son. They gave up the tradition when naming his younger brother, Frank.
  • Caira doesn't know what tires are. And Abe has so much fun with her for it.
  • Most of Bucket's lines. For example:
    "I have come to kick arse and perform routine maintenance duties! And I'm all out of duties."
    "Let's go murder this rare and endangered wildlife. For money!"
    "Follow me primates! Let's violate some warranties!"
  • Hyde's pure comedic sociopathy and singleminded devotion to melting faces.
    Hyde: I'm going to fucking melt the fucking monster's face with my fucking flamethrower.
  • Abe flirting with Val. Really, it's all in the delivery.
    Val: "When we hit the ground, everyone stick together and stay close."
    Abe: "Absolutely. How close you want me?"
    Val: "Not that close."
    Abe: "Alright then."
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  • Parnell brought his comic book collection with him for off time during the mission. He's gotten Markov, Abe, and even Slim hooked on them. The guys regularly talk about it, and Val is getting irritated, saying she's back in Grade School.
  • Caira is curious about Markov's suit, asking if it's a battle suit or what.
    Markov: SALGE.
    Caira: Did you just tell me to fuck off in Martian?!
  • Crow and Torvald might have this "conversation" while waiting to drop into the map:
    Torvald: Hmph.
    Crow: Yeah.
    Torvald: Eh?
    Crow: Iunno.
    Torvald: Mmmm.
    Crow: *sniffs*.
    Torvald: Good talk.
  • If Bucket and Griffin are in the same team, Bucket might ask Griffin about the Monsters getting smarter. Griffin's answer to that and Bucket's reaction can be quite funny.
    Griffin: Kraken seems more wily than Goliath, that's for sure. Figure that's our fault.
    Bucket: Our fault!?
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  • Crow is very Literal-Minded and sometimes can't tell if his fellows are serious or joking whenever they ask him something. This causes some...difficulty in getting the right answer from him.
    Sunny: I want one! (referring to Gobi's helmet)
    Crow: Batrays all over.
    Sunny: No! I want a helmet thing!
    Crow: I don't think you need one. You are...already tame.
    Sunny: Oh my god!

    Hyde: You killed a bleedin' blitzer and walk around wearin' it's skin?
    Crow: Yep.
    Hyde: What the fuck for?
    Crow: Keeps my... head warm.
    Hyde: Are you having me on?
    Crow: Mmmmmmmmaybe?
  • Torvald is pretty determined to not be around Jack, as the kid's Christian Bale-esque voice gets on his nerves.
    Jack: We meet again... Torwald.
    Torvald: I am not speaking to you as long as you keep talking like that
    Jack: (Pretending to be narrating) And with that, the misshapen cyborg has turned his back on our hero.
    Torvald: I am not misshapen.
    Torvald: That is not true!
    Jack: He would never again know the touch of a MAN.
  • Rescuing another Hunter from a Monster's pounce as Caira can sometimes make her shoo away the Monster like a pest. Even funnier if said Monster immediately flees, usually at Stage 1.
    Caira: Shoo! Get away!
    • Sometimes, however, depending on who she rescued, she can just dryly remark about how she's not surprised why the Hunter gets pounced.
    Caira: Of course *you* will get eaten up.
  • Markov, when rescued from a hostile wildlife, will sometimes comment on how unappreciative Shear's wildlife is to the Hunters, despite being animals.
    Markov: Why does planet want to eat Markov, when Markov is trying to save planet?
  • Bucket really enjoys taunting a Goliath and has several dialogue when he encounters one in Hunt Mode. Can be really humorous depending on what's going on.
    Bucket: Nobody likes a bully! Opening fire!
    Bucket: Goliath, have a missile! They're delicious!
    • On the other hand, he's absolutely terrified of Kraken.
    Bucket: I found the lightning monster. This is not something about which I am incredibly happy!
    Bucket: Kraken engaged. Not looking forward to this.
  • When the first Hunter dies, one of the remaining Hunters will have something to say about it. Usually, they're sad or horrified but sometimes, something humorous comes out instead.
    Caira: Abe's gone. Why am I not surprised?
    Crow: (Markov dies) Stupid Martian!
    Lazarus: Markov? Again? I should charge for revivification.
    • Sunny, in particular, is more worried about Val's gun than Val herself. With the way she delivers the line, some fans joked that she's interested in something else that Val had.
    Sunny: No! Not the girl with the healing gun! I liked.....that gun.
  • Hyde admits he's a bit scared of Maggie, in spite of how (as can be seen in the dropship) he's around twice her height and width.
  • Every Hunter has a pretty reasonable way of warning their fellows when a Goliath uses Rock Throw or Fire Breath, including Bucket. Crow?
    Crow: Uh...rock?
    Crow: Dodging rocks. Ok!
    Crow: Uh look out? Yeah. Look out!
    Caira: (Goliath uses Rock Throw) Hey! You can't just rip off the ground like that!
    • That being said, Bucket's reaction to Goliath's Rock Throw is pure dull surprise:
    Bucket: It's got...a rock? Wonderful.
    • Which contrasts heavily with his over-the-top reaction to the Kraken's Lightning Strike, though being a robot, it is understandable.
    Bucket: Lightning! Save your circuits!
    • Jack, though, wonders if the Goliath might be throwing a Megamouth, one of Shear's wildlife that can camouflage as a boulder.
  • Bucket, despite being a robot, is just as much a target of Shear's wildlife as his human fellows. He often tries to rectify the problem:
    Maggie: (sniff) Bucket, you smell different. Explain.
    Bucket: Ah yes. I've completely drained and replaced my lubricants. Thank you for noticing.
    Maggie: Daisy doesn't like it. You smell wrong.
    Bucket: That is rather the point actually. I believe the native wildlife found my previous fluids delicious. Why else would they continue to attempt to eat me.
    Maggie: You'd be surprised what a trapjaw will eat Bucket. You won't change that with a different marinade.
    • When he does survive an attack from a dangerous wildlife, he is not amused:
  • Whenever a Hunters gets caught inside a Chomper Plant, most of them are understandably horrified. The rest, however, have other problems going through their head while being digested:
    Markov: Fuck you, vegetable!
    Markov: Markov...Markov is...fine! Markov is not in plant!
    Caira: I'm in a plant. Cool!
    Caira: Hey! Get me out of this...this...plant? A plant? Wow.
    Bucket: Oh right the man eating plant. I forgot.
    Lazarus: The embarrassment! It is...agonizing!
    Lennox: Hey, am I in a plant? Could someone check? Thanks!
    • All Tier 4 Hunters, except Crow, have a common line when being caught by the plant. Especially humorous when heard back to back
    "Argh, you stupid plant!"
    • If Bucket sees the plant, he might describe its appearance in a rather colorful manner:
    Bucket: Ah! One of those plants that looks like a giant anus!
  • Some Hunters have rather amusing reactions to being pounced on by a sneaking Monster. Hilarious when you remember that the Monsters are gigantic.
    Caira: Uhh...I found it?
    Markov: Argh! Sneaky...cowardly beast!
    Bucket: Get off of me! I am already a heavily abused piece of machinery!
    Hyde: Argh! How did you-!
  • Abe's reaction upon seeing a Monster minion in Defend or Nest mode.
    Abe: Man you fail one mission and suddenly there's baby Goliaths everywhere! I call bullshit!
  • Whenever an Abe player successfully catches a Monster in his Mobile Arena and pings the Monster, he might taunt the Monster with this gem:
    Abe: Yeah! We got technology, motherfucker!
    • Similarly, pinging a caught Monster as Bucket might make him point out something obvious:
    Bucket: You've captured the Monster! And really upset it!
    • Even funnier if the Monster is actively attacking him while he says it.
  • Whenever all but one Hunter have died before respawning, the sole survivor can be humorously nonchalant about their odds.
    Bucket: No humans for miles....(sigh of relief)
    Crow: Back to normal again.
  • Some Hunters don't take too well to being ignored while incapacitated outside of combat. Leave them alone long enough and most of them will remark on how bored they are or ask why they are still on the ground.
    • Caira will attempt to collect soil samples if she's still on the ground outside of combat.
    • Bucket will make half-hearted attempts to gain sympathy or think about upgrading himself.
    Bucket: Hello? Anyone? I am wounded...and cold...and...lonely.
    Bucket: I have decided legs are stupid. Next time, tank treads!
  • In combat, however, some of the Hunters will outright beg to be revived if left alone, which often comes off as rather amusing when it comes from one of the more bigger and manlier Hunters.
    • Lazarus will, very rarely, assume that he's being left alone on purpose and promises not to bring anything nasty back to life if he's rescued.
    • Both Bucket and Lennox will sometimes shout for a mechanic instead of the medic. For the latter, she's not picky.
    Bucket: Mechanic! I mean, Medic!
    Lennox: Medic! Mechanic! I'm not picky!
  • In turn, some Hunters just love to rib their downed teammates while reviving them, with different dialogues depending on whether it happens in combat or out.
    Bucket: Hello injured monkey. Oh, it's you!
    Bucket: Ah, I see you're on your ass again. Typical.
    Lazarus: Damn, you're heavy Hyde. Lose some pounds!
    Sunny: Hey I found Lazarus! Come on baldy.
    Abe: (reviving Caira outside combat) What, are you looking at plants? Fungus? Want me to...let you work?
    • Getting revived by Daisy will have the revived Hunter praise Daisy and promising to reward her with food later. Bucket and Lennox, though, are amazed as to how her licking could repair them.
  • Have Sunny shoot at a Monster egg and she might make fun of Torvald's tendency to say "Doom!". The delivery really sells it.
    Sunny: Hello egg! My name is Torvald! I am your doom! DOOM!
  • Before the Hunters drop into the map in Nest Mode, Bucket, if he's on the team, might say this:
    Bucket: If you find one of its eggs, call out. And not, "Ahhh!!". Try to be specific.
  • If a map effect is active, Bucket, regardless of whether or not he's on the team, might comment on it before the team drops in. If it is a map effect that favors the Monster, he might say it with such cheerfulness that one wonders if he's able to differentiate good news from bad news. He might even admit to being unable to do that for one of the map effects.
  • A meta example: The nightmare fuel that is Gorgon has a skin called Gorgon-zola. Now you can dress up the gigantic spider beast like a lump of cheese when you hunt your foes.
    Tasty but terrifying, get the Zola skin to dress Gorgon with a salty creamy bite.
  • Most of EMET's dialogue and the other hunters' reactions to the demon core taking over.

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