Evile
Short piece of fiction? Then what's with all the characters, and why the hell are they all on one side?
Make a fallen hero or something, otherwise take out a couple of the good guys. I mean, why the hell are they in this story in the first place? If they have no reason to be part of the plot, then take them out. I suggest you start a plot with a few(maybe one or two) central characters that you'll focus your attention on and build up from there. Demote everyone else to side characters or simple extras for the time being. Otherwise, read Durarara or Baccano(the light novel) and try to copy Ryohgo Narita's writing style. Though, you'd still need a plot.
What does signature do?
Superheroes are hard to write in today's day and age, they need a lot of subversion to be unique. I ask you this: what is the most important aspect of your character and/or concept? Remove it.
This falls more into Fan Fiction territory, but a discussion at https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=15127169590A16706000&page=1
suggested I ask this sort of question here.
I was considering writing a Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Fan Fic, which is an:
- Alternate Continuity: It doesn't follow the events of the TV series directly, in many ways, namely:
- Daisy Johnson/Skye isn't Ambiguously Human, and isn't a hacker here, but a sysadmin, and her powers are closer to a [[{{Characters/Arrowverse/Metahumans}} metahuman]] from The Flash (2014), in that she's got the power to control technology, but doesn't have With Great Power Comes Great Insanity.
- Agent Coulson never died and was never brought Back from the Dead.
- Black Widow is Ambiguously Bi.
- Jessica Jones has some connection to Daisy Johnson/Skye, although they haven't seen each other in years.
- Melinda May isn't as much of a Broken Bird as in the mainstream continuity, and she's a Big Eater with a Trademark Favorite Food of spicy pies or pasties - usually Mexican pies or Australian ones, and she's vegetarian too.
- Leopold Fitz grew up only with his mom, his dad died when he was only 18 months old and his mom was a Single Mom Stripper who still works as one even now.
- Willie Lumpkin never knew The Fantastic Four and has known Coulson for a long time.
- Lance Hunter doesn't exist in this universe, but an Asgardian female (name decided) living on Earth takes his place on the team. She's a Composite Character who's got Lady Sif's The Conscience and Crazy-Prepared values, Lorelei's Femme Fatale behavior, Frigga's Master of Illusion, Loki's Death Glare and Thor's Friendly Rivalry (with Katya) and Obfuscating Stupidity.
- Jemma Simmons does not exist in this universe, being replaced by Katya, who is similar to [[{{Characters/Black Widow}} Black Widow physically]], being a redhead, but unlike the Black Widow, was never a Child Soldier or a spy, and she's Russian-Canadian rather than being Russian, or a Sensual Slav. All she really has in common is being a Badass Bookworm, Made of Iron, Good Is Not Soft.
Where she really differs from the Black Widow is that she's very Girly Girl in nature, has something of an obsession with wearing sports bra-style crop tops and athleisure wear when off the clock, and behaving more like April Kepner from Grey's Anatomy (well, only so far as being a Genki Girl).That's the basics of the universe this story resides in, but how can I make a plotline that would work well with it, and a suitable antagonist to fit this team?
So far, I've been toying with the idea of them ending up in the West Coast with no idea how they got there.
It's a short piece of Fan Fic, not a Door Stopper, and I've had this idea since I saw Thor: Ragnarok.
I would appreciate any advice on how to expand this.
edited 7th May '18 1:31:57 PM by Merseyuser1