Tropers / Guymelef Kaizer

An autistic, introverted recluse from... America. Late teens, but not quite old enough to vote yet. While incredibly intelligent (as most of his peers would agree to), lacks motivation to unleash his full potential... except where videogames are concerned. Is considering going to college in Utah. Claims to be obsessed with comic books, various anime/manga, and videogames, particularly of the Final Fantasy and Fire Emblem series, but numerous other stuff as well... and is capable of playing Prototype for three hours and then switching to Card Captor Sakura without suffering from any type of mood whiplash. Also a major fan of science-fiction, although he has recently become interested in noir-type fiction, due to "Spidey-Noir" appearing in the videogame "Shattered Dimensions". Also writes a lot of fanfiction, appearing to specialize in not-quite-but-almost-crack-pairings (YMMV) and semi-crack-crossovers (often featuring Naruto/FF___. Again, YMMV). In addition, he has the occasional tendency to overuse the word "also" when he keeps thinking of other examples that he thinks should've been added on to the original point.

Can also be found lurking on some Wikis as "Mecha Ultima Zero" (remove the spaces), and has an account on under that name as well.

Guymelef Kaizer is a combination of a concept from an anime he saw when he was a little kid, and the German word for "Emperor".

Favorite Works Include:

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     Video Games 

     Western Animation 

     Other Interests 
  • Mythology
    • Norse
    • Japanese
    • Greek/Roman

Tropes Describing Guymelef Kaizer (more will be added once he runs through a "complete list" of them all):
  • All There in the Manual: actually takes the time to read the manuals, and has the sad tendency of assuming that most others do as well.
  • Aloof Big Brother: Well, half-brother, but close enough.
  • Anti-Climax: Views the vast majority of Real Life as being this trope.
  • Berserk Button: Numerous and varied:
    • Other people making a stressful situation moreso
    • Repeatedly asking the same kinds of questions over and over again,
    • Someone constantly pestering him when GK is trying to ignore them,
    • Attacking him in what GK would percieve as hostile, even if it wasn't intended that way, is almost certainly going to provoke an agressive and violent response.
  • Better Than It Sounds: many of his fanfic ideas sound like crap if presented with just a sound-byte summary, but are actually pretty good if one takes the time to read them.
  • Beware the Nice Ones: While he normally acts relatively benevolent, one should indeed tread lightly when dealing with him.
  • Beyond the Impossible: How much more unlikely will the next crossover fanfic become? How far will the next incarnation of a canon character be different from said canon character? What so-called "sacred pairing" will he ruthlessly tear apart next?
  • Blessed with Suck: YMMV, and this may sound a bit angsty, but it's rough being one of the brightest people in a school, on the same level of intelligence and (generally speaking) maturity as people in their 30s, and everyone around acts like a five-year-old on crystal meth.
  • Bookworm
  • Brilliant, but Lazy: So much so that if GK's life were a book, this would be a critical plot point. As others would say, "fails to live up to his full potential."
  • Captain Obvious: somewhat subverted, in the sense that things most people would consider glaringly obvious are actually not obvious to him.
    • The inverse is also true. As a result, GK and other people are on the same page... less often than not, in the context of Real Life.
  • Catch-Phrase: a couple, including "The only true perfection is the ultimate lack thereof", "Leave me the f*ck alone", and "I can't answer that with just two choices."
  • The Chains of Commanding: has had to deal with being the leader of a group, sometimes even a Five-Man Band, and doesn't like it.
  • Chaotic Neutral: Chaos — to a degree — is a blessing, as it keeps life from getting too boring. Also, good and evil are both hopelessly negative when taken to extreme.
  • Cluster F-Bomb: When brought to anger.
  • Crack Pairing: Most of the pairings he writes fanfiction for can qualify as this.
  • Crapsack World: GK's view of Real Life.
  • Crazy Survivalist: YMMV, based primarily on his Do Not Taunt Cthulhu entry.
  • Crosses the Line Twice: when angered or stressed, it's pretty common for this to occur.
  • Dark Is Not Evil: It isn't. Guns don't kill people, people kill people using guns. If guns can be used for good, then so can darkness.
  • Darker and Edgier: Whenever this troper writes a fanfic about something, the fanfic universe normally ends up being darker and edgier than the original canon was. There were one or two exceptions, though.
  • Dark Fic: GK writes these frequently, though there's almost certainly darker.
  • Deadpan Snarker: Averted; while he frequently tries, he usually fails at it.
  • Discontinuity: GK frequently changes the facts of whatever fictional universe he's writing for so as to fit the plot. So technically, they're all Alternate Universe. Some work out better than others.
  • Do Not Taunt Cthulhu: GK generally knows better than to antagonize those who can and will kick his ass. See also Crazy Survivalist.
  • Don't Explain the Joke: And don't repeat yourself if you know he heard you the first time.
  • Don't You Dare Pity Me!: Ever. End of discussion.
  • Everything Trying to Kill You: Maybe not "kill", but certainly "hurt" and "piss off".
  • Hates Everyone Equally: Is simply more tolerant of some than others.
  • Honor Before Reason: Inverted.
  • I Am What I Am: And anyone who can't accept that isn't his problem.
  • I Don't Even Care: And often gets roped into helping anyway.
  • Intelligence Equals Isolation: And how.
  • Lack of Empathy
  • No Sympathy
  • Not a Morning Person
  • Properly Paranoid
  • Stroke the Beard: even before he had one.
  • Younger Than They Look: was once hit on by a waitress thinking he was 25. She was ten years off the mark.