Perhaps the most self-aware example on this page.
"Welcome to D'ni. You and I will live here...forever."
A Stock Phrase used when one character welcomes another (whether as a threat, sarcastically, or otherwise) to some kind of bad situation. For example, a cop welcoming the new guy to the precinct (a la RoboCop) or a villain threatening the hero (sometimes with a literal hell).
Often used to describe That One Level. Compare See You in Hell.
Not to be confused with the webcomic and animated short Welcome to Hell.
Examples:
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Anime & Manga
- The Downer Beginning of Cross Ange culminates in Ange being sent to Arzenal, where she is stripped of all her belongings by Jill, the head warden. After kicking her into a prison gate and confiscating her royal jewelry, Jill proclaims "Welcome to a living hell," before slashing Ange's clothes off with a knife, chaining her to a table, and then practically raping her bloody with a brutal, iron-fisted cavity search.
Comedy
- Rowan Atkinson does a skit in which he is Satan and is welcoming the latest batch of souls to Hell.
The opening line is "welcome to hell" (or close). He then proceeds to separate the souls into groups for their respective punishments.
Comic Books
- Jack Chick frequently has his character say this literally, but sometimes has them do it figuratively for exceptionally degenerate and dangerous places. Naturally, said places end up getting turned around completely thanks to one person with a Chick Tract talking to and converting the right people.
- Shortly before Batman: No Man's Land, there's a short storyline where the inmates of Arkham take over the place under The Joker's leadership; when Batman investigates (on the last two pages of the first part), he finds his whole Rogues Gallery there to meet him. "Welcome to Hell," says the Joker.
- Lucky Luke: Every town out West has a signpost with the town's name and a pithy quote that was probably not approved by the tourism board.
Golden Glow: Stranger, many came here looking for gold, many found lead.
Alfafa City: Home of America's richest undertaker.
Cactus Junction: Stranger, we got everything you need: a hotel, a prison, a saloon, a cemetery.
Patos River: A quiet town. Some have found eternal rest.
Grassy Junction: Stranger, the richest men in town are the hangman and the undertaker.
Purgatory: Stranger, we don't like strangers in these parts.
Nothing Gulch: We got tar, we got feathers, we like having fun.
Comic Strips
- The reaction to the Pointy-Haired Boss in Dilbert when he cracks down on employees taking 40% of their sick time on Monday and Friday.
Asok: HA HA HA! THAT'S A GOOD ONE!... please tell me he was kidding.
Wally: Welcome to Hell, kid. - A panel of The Far Side used this phrase by an old cowboy, reminding the young cowpoke who just beat him in a duel that from now on, he'll know no rest from every cocky young punk looking to prove himself. Since this is The Far Side, the duel in question was a game of Ping-Pong.
- In another Far Side, we get two contrasting panels: "Welcome to Heaven. Here's your harp." / "Welcome to Hell. Here's your accordion."
Films — Animation
- Ratatouille: On Linguini's second day on the job, Skinner greets him with "Welcome to hell. Now recreate the soup."
Films — Live-Action
- Edge of Darkness (2010)
Thomas Craven: Welcome to Hell!
- RoboCop
Manson: Where are you from?
Murphy: Metro South.
Manson: Welcome to hell. - Sydney White
Rachel Witchburn: Welcome to Hell, skanks!
- Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
Arthur (IanMcDiarmid): [greeting a returning Freddy] Welcome to Hell.
- Quid Pro Quo
Isaac: Welcome to hell. I'll introduce you to the staff.
- Hellraiser
- Hellraiser: Inferno:
Pinhead: Welcome... to Hell.
- And again in Hellraiser: Hellworld
Pinhead: Welcome. Welcome to Hell.
- Hellraiser: Inferno:
- Men of War (not the RTS game)
Nick: [to Keefer] Welcome to Hell.
- Control Factor
Lance Bishop: ...your little secret, that the devil doesn't exist any more. Because you and your people have taken his place. Here's my little secret. Welcome to hell...
- Glory Glory
Ellie: [returning to Silver Creek where they were raped] Welcome home, Widow, welcome to hell.
- Kutumb
Pratham: Welcome to Hell.
- Child's Play 3
Whitehurst: Welcome to Hell, Barclay.
- Inherit the Wind: E. K. Hornbeck, to Henry Drummond: "Hello, Devil. Welcome to Hell."
- Diamonds Are Forever: "Welcome to Hell, Blofeld."
- Nothing To Lose: "Welcome to hell, biiiiatch."
- Paint Your Wagon: "Welcome to hell, Parson!"
- The Rookie: "Well, welcome to Hell!"
- Little Miss Sunshine:
Dwayne: [on notepad] Welcome to hell.
Frank: Thanks, Dwayne. Coming from you, that means a lot. - Hombre Mirando Al Sudeste: Thought by Dr. Denis at the beginning of the movie.
- A variant in Aliens: "We're on an express elevator to Hell, going down!"
- The horror anthology Tales from the Hood ends with the host revealing himself as Satan and triumphantly welcoming the street gang he's been talking to with this phrase, as only a true Large Ham can.
Mr. Simms: Welcome.. to Hell, motherfuckerssss!!
- He Died With a Felafel in His Hand, from the Sydney-based chapter "Hell is Other People..."
Danny: Welcome to hell.
Sam: At least it's warm. - Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers - The comatose Myers is about to be transferred, much to the relief of the staff at his hospital.
Cop: Yeah, I'll be glad to see this one gone. Yes, indeedy. Welcome to hell.
- From Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey:
Colonel Oats: GENTLEMEEENNN! Welcome to Hell.
- During the climactic fight scene in the industrial sections of the prison in Death Warrant, the psycho killer the Sandman is trouncing Burke in front of the spectating prisoners. He then opens one of the furnaces, and proudly declares "Welcome to HELL!"
- Robin Hood (1991): After being run through at the end of the climactic sword fight, Sir Miles Falconet stumbles into a torch-lit stairway, where he finds a bunch of the revolting peasants, and Friar Tuck, who, trolling him, yells, "Welcome to Hell!" On hearing this, Sir Miles screams, then falls over, dead.
- In G.I. Joe: Retaliation, when warden Nigel James brings an individual that he believes to be Snake Eyes to the underground Einsargen prison, he tells him that he wants him to doubt there was ever a word for escape, following it up with "Welcome to hell." "You have no idea," the man replies. James then takes off his mask and discovers that he does not have Snake Eyes after all, but rather Snake Eye's nemesis, Storm Shadow. Later, as Storm Shadow is breaking out, he tells James "Welcome to hell," holding his sword in front of his face. James, however, electrocutes him and flees.
- Quid Pro Quo: After Fiona, upon using a wheelchair out in public the first time, remarks on how long getting a taxi took, Isaac snarks:
Isaac: Welcome to hell. I'll introduce you to the staff.
Literature
- In 1987, Emily Perl Kingsley, who was a writer for Sesame Street at the time, wrote a magazine article entitled "Welcome to Holland" about what it's like to give birth to a child with a disability. note She likened it to spending months planning for a trip to Italy and winding up in Holland: you feel upset that your life ended up on a different path than the one you planned for, and it doesn't help when other people brag about their lives. In a subversion, however, Emily points out that if you waste your time complaining about what could have been, you miss out on the opportunity to enjoy what or who you have.
- Dave Barry uses the phrase in one of his holiday gift guides:
Mister Dip Lip, which is made from a material that feels very much like the Glow-In-The-Dark Squid, is a realistic replica of a human mouth that opens up, via levers in the back, to reveal, in vivid detail, the various alarming developments that can occur if you use tobacco products. If you knew somebody who was just about to wake up with a terrible hangover, you could creep into his bedroom, hold Mister Dip Lip's mouth one inch from his eyes, and then, while moving Mister Dip Lip's mouth levers, shout: "HI, BOB! WELCOME TO HELL!" This gift is too good to give away. Keep it yourself.
Live-Action TV
- The title character of Angel says this to the villain in "Hellbound" after trapping him, immortal and paralyzed, in a tiny room (the irony being that the villain's motive was to avoid the more literal Hell, something he doesn't have to worry about anymore).
- In the Check It Out! With Dr. Steve Brule episode "Church", Dr. Brule suggests that Satan is known to say "Welcome to Hell, who gives a shit."
- Doctor Who: In "The Impossible Planet", this is written on a wall inside Sanctuary Base 6. What really gets the Doctor's attention is the writing underneath, which is so old not even the TARDIS can translate it.
- ER episode "Doctor Carter, I Presume":
Dr. Melvoin: [to a fresh group of interns] You are wedges. The wedge is the most primitive tool known to man. That is you. You think you know what you're doing, believe me, you don't. Breakfast with your Senior Surgical Resident Dr. Benton will begin in 15 minutes. Dr. Benton is an intern's worst nightmare. He's smarter than you, he never eats, he never sleeps and he reads every medical journal no matter how obscure. He is the Antichrist. Beelzebub. Lucifer. A devourer of wedges. You will go to sleep at night wishing plague and pestilence on his unborn children and you will wake up every morning praying for his approval. You won't get it. Welcome to hell, ladies and gentlemen.
- Saturday Night Live
David Spade: Macaulay Culkin. [snip] Let me tell you something kid, you're cute, you got blond hair, everyone loves you, it's true. Here's the catch: I used to look exactly like you when I was 10. Oh yeah. This is where you're headed, buddy, welcome to hell!
- In Scrubs, Turk does this to some visiting interns. JD also compares Dr. Kelso to the devil (calling him a Devil in Plain Sight when he gives his "I want you to think of me as your safety net" speech to them as he did in the pilot).
- Star Trek: Deep Space Nine episode "Hard Time":
Ee'char: My name is Ee'char.
Chief Miles Edward O'Brien: Miles. Miles O'Brien.
Ee'char: Hello, Miles. Welcome to hell. - Vecinos pilot episode:
Alejandra: Welcome to the Hell-Mouth. This, our new home!
- Horatio Hornblower: When young Hornblower comes aboard HMS Justinian, Midshipman Archie Kennedy is supposed to show him around and one of the first things he says to him, grinning, is, "Welcome to purgatory."
Music
- Welcome to my Realm by Fireaxe. Interesting in that it is actually sung by the devil as he is literally welcoming people into Hell. And using the screams of the damned as backup vocals.
- The debut album and title track by Venom.
- In the Voltaire song Death Death (Devil Devil Evil Evil Songs), the singer finds himself in hell by the end, where the devil admits that he (and his wife) are actually big fans...and then stabs the singer in the genitalia with a pitchfork.
The Devil: I'm just kiddin', kid. Welcome to hell, enjoy the buffet!
Professional Wrestling
- The Undertaker says this to Kane and Paul Bearer from his return in 1998 after the latter two burned the Undertaker's casket with him inside it two months prior.
Video Games
- Stranglehold
Vladimir Zakarov: He tells me you're here for Billie and Teko.
Inspector 'Tequila' Yuen: That's right.
Vladimir Zakarov: And that you'd walk through hell to get them. Is that right too?
Tequila: [nods]
Vladimir Zakarov: Welcome to hell.
- In this case, is a penthouse full of heavily armed mooks and lasers everywhere (and if you touch the latter, BOOM — you're dead) where your usual tactics of bullet time and diving around will get you very, very dead in short order.
- Appears on a sign at the start of the Bonus Dungeon in Cave Story. And the level actually looks like Hell, complete with evil angels.
- Should a Ketsui player be skilled enough to unlock the special version of the second loop (no dying, no bombing, and at least 120,000,000 points), the text "WELCOME TO SPECIAL ROUND" appears in red font against a solid black background for several seconds before the new loop begins. Said "Special Round" features the same five stages all over again, but with significantly more powerful enemy attacks, enemies will fire a large cluster of bullets at the player when destroyed, and if the player makes it to the very end, the True Final Boss Evaccaneer DOOM awaits. In other words, welcome to (the real) Bullet Hell. If playing Ketsui Deathtiny with the "2nd Round Info" widget enabled, the "WELCOME TO SPECIAL ROUND" text also appears in the widget in place of all other info and persists for the rest of the game.
- Hell Temple in La-Mulana has a welcoming tablet, which reminds the player: "This is Hell Temple. Hell Temple is hell!"
- The Penguin says this word for word when Bruce Wayne enters Arkham City in Batman: Arkham City.
- Marvel Ultimate Alliance 3: The Black Order has a variation on this, courtesy of Norse mythology.
Rocket Raccoon: Okay, we are definitely dead this time.
Thor: Nay, I know this foul place well, noble vermin. The Black Order hath banished us to the Asgardian realm of lost souls...welcome to Hel, mortals. - In Monster Party, The Grim Reaper says "Welcome! Entrance to Hell."
- Modern Warfare 3 has Makarov declare to Captain Price that "hell awaits you" as the first sign that the assassination mission on him has gone horribly wrong, especially as he wasn't even supposed to know that Price and the player's team were there. It's also a clever Call-Back to the second game, where Price had told him See You in Hell.
- In the original Myst, if you enter D'ni without the white page, Atrus will call you out on your stupidity and will inform you that you are now trapped with him forever.
- In Devil May Cry 3: Dante's Awakening, Jester says this straight away during his boss fights.
- Dungeon Crawl: "Welcome to Hell! Please enjoy your stay."
- In Naruto Shippuden: Ultimate Ninja Storm 2, Sasori says this as he unleashes his many puppets against Sakura and Chiyo.
- In Saints Row: Gat Out of Hell, this is how Dane Vogel greets Johnny Gat and Kinzie when they meet. Considering what happened to Dane in Saints Row 2, he means it quite literally...
- What the Hecatomb may say to you if you die in Phantasmagoria: A Puzzle of Flesh.
- Spec Ops: The Line:
- The first time you hear the words "Gentlemen, welcome to Dubai" is not really an example of this trope. But come that worst ending... this is how Walker greets the US forces sent to rescue him. After killing them all.
- There's also the final conventional mission of the game, Chapter 14, where the theme Welcome to Hell fittingly plays in the background of a grueling, uphill firefight against two entrenched turrets and the final remnants of the 33rd, in what would ordinarily amount to a suicide mission.
Konrad: Welcome to Hell, Walker. We've been waiting for you.
- Before you fight him in Mortal Kombat: Armageddon, Drahmin welcomes Taven to Hell (or specifically, the Netherealm).
- In Total War: Warhammer, Balthasar Gelt has a variation of this during his campaign, before a battle in Estalia:
Balthasar Gelt: Welcome to Estalia, gentlemen. I will not lie, the chances of your survival are small. Some may even turn against your friends as living corpses, but you have my word that I will use my arcane gifts to ensure your bodies are given unto Morr's Garden. This is the greatest reward, more than even gold, for the fate of your soul is an eternal concern. Now come, follow me. Strike down the undead that rise against us, allow me to find this eldritch amulet. I ask not for my own selfish studies, but for the good of the Empire!
- Hecatia Lapislazuli of Touhou Project, being the resident Perky Goth Physical Goddess of the Hells of the Earth, Moon and Otherworlds, wears a Fun T-Shirt with the phrase "Welcome ♥ Hell" printed on it.
Webcomics
- Early in Concerned: The half-life and death of Gordon Frohman, Dr. Breen has a Is This Thing Still On? moment that includes this phrase.
- In Girl Genius, after Agatha enters the castle.
- Used in Shades Of Gray to welcome Grace/Gray to actual Hell.
- From Erfworld: "You are in what may be the worst, most Titans-forsaken place in all of Erfworld. This is the Olive Garden."
- Slightly Damned: Welcome to Hell is the code word Moonshade uses to let the forces of hell know to begin their attack.
Web Original
- "Welcome to fucking Boatmurdered! Hope you like miasma!"
Web Videos
- The Angry Video Game Nerd, review of Super Mario Bros. 3: "This part doesn't fuck around! It's like, you got to the end, you dare to play, welcome to Hell!"
Western Animation
- Home Movies: In the Camp episode, which was... uh, hell for the kids. Welcome to hellllll, yer gonna burn in there...
- Discussed in The Venture Brothers, episode "Hate Floats":
Phantom Limb: Oh yes, apart from ‘Behold-the-Giant-Walking-Death-Ray’ speech, the ‘Welcome-To-Hell’ speech is my favorite.
- Family Guy - After some kids spray-paint Brian pink...
Stewie: Hey, here's someone who might understand how you feel!
Pink Panther: Hey, how ya doing. First day being pink?
Brian: Yeah.
Panther: Welcome to hell. [walks off as his classic music sting plays] - In the Rocko's Modern Life episode "To Heck and Back," Heffer dies and goes to Heck after choking on a chicken bone, and is greeted by a sign reading "Welcome to Heck, a friendly neighborhood".
Heffer: Wait a minute. Heck? Isn't it supposed to be...
Peaches: (covers Heffer's mouth) Censors! - Subverted in The Simpsons episode where Bart and Lisa attend military school, with "Gentlemen, welcome to Flavor Country."
- Smiling Friends: Charlie gets this welcome after he's crushed by a falling tree. He's then introduced to his hell mattress, his hell toilet and Jeremy, his only source of hellish entertainment.
- In an episode of Beast Wars, Cheetor is accidentally teleported to the evil Predacon's ship. When found, Terrorsaur greets him by saying "welcome to the dark side!" Amusingly, this has been retconned to "Welcome to the Darksyde!" and Darksyde has become the name of the ship.
Real Life
- Hell is in Michigan, apparently. And often freezes over.◊ It's also in Norway, apparently. And the Cayman Islands.
- Police and firefighters in Rio de Janeiro displaying signs reading "Welcome to hell. Police and firefighters don't get paid, whoever comes to Rio de Janeiro will not be safe", in the wake of the 2016 Summer Olympics.
