The Red Guy: Of course Flem's dad couldn't explain what had happened, because HE'S AN IDIOT! Oh just look at those shorts.
And after he explains it, he himself forgets who he is, and flies through the wall and into the sunset thinking that he is Amelia Earhart
Red reading a fairy tale from a cookbook in "Goin' My Way":
"And then, the Three Little Bacon Steaks were put in the oven and baked at 350, smothered in chocolate! The end.
In "The Legend of Sailcat" (which is weird even by their standards) they have one bit where Flem's dad sings that "when someone's depressed or has had a bad day (Sailcat) can always drop in with the right thing to say". What does Sailcat say to the bawling Cow? " Don't be depressed Cow, people like you because you're big and fat and ugly. Go with it!"
From "Comet!": "PLEASE, walk this way." (Red bounces on his butt and everyone except Chicken does the same)
Red freaking out from the comet (actually Chicken pranking him with a golf ball).
Make up your mind, comet!
From the episode where Cow accidentally swallows Chicken, they take her to "Dr. Heiney". He proceeds to do a series of random tests before taking a "milk sample" from Cow.
Dad: Uh, doctor what is the point of this experiment?
Dr. Heiney: Well, I'm thirsty, and your daughter's a cow. DO THE MATH!
Red's epic breakdown in "I Scream, Man", and then ending up in a mental clinic for it.
Red: AAAAAHHHH!!!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!!! I don't have any ice cream! Not one, so! EVER! I don't even like ice cream, OR KIDS! It says "Eye Screem" on my truck, not "Ice Cream"! Get it? 'cause I SCREAM!!! Look at me. (screams while spinning in circles) SCREAMING IS MY HOBBYYYYYY!!!!!!.
Policeman: (hits Red with a sausage) It's the padded cell for you, scream man!
Also, he tries to give Chicken ice cubes in a cone and Cow a beaver in a cone (SURPRISE!).
Red makes a No Animals Were Harmed statement at the end of the episode... and then he complains that HE was harmed instead (more than once).
From "The Great Pantzini," Red (as The Great Pantzini) making Mike the micro-trunked elephant cry by bringing up the time he crushed the Chinese acrobats (now referred to as, "The Chinese Pancakes.") and Red trying to convince Chicken that a weenie dog is his one-trick pony.