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Characters: Books of Kings
Solomon

"Consider the lilies of the field. Not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed as well as these."

The Queen of Sheba

  • Did They or Didn't They?: Debate rages to this day as to whether or not she was ever intimately involved with Solomon during her visit. (The Ethiopian monarchy claimed to have secret books that not only say they did, but that the resulting child founded their dynasty.)
  • The Smart Girl: Was pretty well-read and eloquent.
  • Where The Hell Is Sheba?: Debates range to this day.

Rehoboam, king of Judah

  • Badass Boast: Which convinces the ten Northern tribes to secede.

Jeroboam, king of Israel

  • Arch-Enemy: To Solomon.
  • Fallen Hero: Started as The Chosen One. Before Ahab, bad Israelite kings were described as "walking in the ways of Jeroboam, who led Israel to sin."
  • Noble Fugitive: Fled to Egypt after antagonizing Solomon and came back only when he died.

Zimri, king of Israel

  • Driven to Suicide: Set his palace on fire.
  • Klingon Promotion: Became King by assassination. His "reign" lasted a week. Before Judas, Zimri was the byword for "traitor." Jezebel called Jehu a "Zimri."

Ahab

"I will purge the house of Ahab like I had done to the houses of Jeroboam and Baasha. Anyone who dies in the city will be eaten by dogs and anyone who dies in the country will be eaten by birds!"

  • Corner of Woe: After Naboth refused to sell his vineyard to Ahab, Ahab proceeded to curl up on his couch, refuse to eat and go into a truly royal sulk.
  • Heel Realization: After Elijah declared to him the fate of his family, Ahab tore his clothing and fasted, humbling himself before God.
  • Hoist by His Own Petard: His plan to get Jehoshaphat killed in battle backfired and Ahab was killed instead.
  • Manipulative Bastard: Was always scheming to displace the Davidic dynasty in Judah.

Jezebel

The very dogs will eat up Jezebel in the plot of land of Jezreel.

Elijah the Tishbite

He went and dwelt by the brook Cherith, that is before Jordan. And the ravens brought him bread and flesh in the morning, and bread and flesh in the evening; and he drank of the brook.

  • Angel Unaware: Jewish tradition has him taking up this role. Elijah was human back in Biblical days, but he never died and, according to legend, ascended to Heaven while still alive. To this day, it is believed he turns up on Earth sometimes to deliver unexpected help.
  • Ascend to a Higher Plane of Existence: He went to Heaven in a fiery whirlwind, rather than die. When he ascended, his robes/coat fell onto his apprentice/friend/padawan Elisha, thus inventing the phrase "Taking up the mantle of the prophet." Many still leave a seat open for him at feasts, because they believe that he will come back. In fact, the last verse of the Old Testament refers to Elijah coming back to announce the Day of the Lord.
  • Badass Longcoat: The Coat, or Mantle of The Prophet. It was instrumental in Elijah and Elisha's first meeting, Elijah threw The Coat at Elisha, who instinctively caught it. Later, Elijah parted a river with with it, just before giving it to Elisha, who also used it perform miracles.
  • Clever Crows: God sent ravens to feed him.
  • Friend to All Living Things: When he was hungry, ravens would bring food to him. Despite his skill in killing people, he was very good with animals and kids. It might have something to do with how he grew up in the wilderness.
  • Last of His Kind:
    • He thought that he was the last surviving prophet and the last faithful person left for a while. God told him that he was not alone and, even if he is the last prophet, he can always train some more prophets, like Elisha.
    • He and Elisha were also the last major Old Testament characters to work miracles. (Though many characters in the New Testament worked miracles.)
  • Playing with Fire: His specialty.
  • Platonic Life Partners: Him and the widow, arguably.
  • The Obi-Wan: To Elisha, his successor. Another interpretation is that Elijah was the Kamina to Elisha's Simon. Everyone remembers how awesome Elijah was, but Elisha was way more awesome.
  • You Are Not Alone: God showed up, not in a maelstrom of fire, not in a howling wind/hurricane, but in a still, small voice to tell Elijah this.

Elisha

The spirit of Elijah doth rest on Elisha.

  • Arc Words: His last words to Elijah, "My father, my father, the chariot of Israel, and the horsemen thereof," were spoken to him also as he lay dying. No one knows what it means even now.
  • Badass Longcoat: Given to him by Elijah, later used to part the sea, proving himself the true prophet, thus inventing the phrase "Taking up the mantle of the prophet."
  • Bald of Awesome: Never, under any circumstances, insult him for it. Ever. Forty-two youths learned this the hard way.
  • Berserk Button: Never insult his mentor and NEVER mock his baldness in front of him.
  • Dub Induced Plothole: A nice prophet guy summoning bears to maul what King James and co. translate as "children" makes a lot more sense when you look at the actual Hebrew word and see what it means and how it was used. He was being mocked by a gang of 42 young men, which could have been a threat, especially if they were soldiers.
  • Good Is Not Nice: If summoning two bears to maul 42 youths because they mocked your baldness is any implication.
  • Nice Guy: Surprisingly so, especially when compared to his mentor, Elijah. While most of Elijah's miracles were powerful, violent and fiery, Elisha's miracles were mostly to heal, save or help people. Elijah showed thousands of people the power of God, while Elisha preached to individuals and showed God's helpful, loving side. Just don't insult Elijah, or mock his Bald of Awesome. However, Elisha was not good with kids, nor was he as good with animals as Elijah. Maybe it was because he was a city kid?
  • Think Nothing of It: He refused to take a material reward for curing Naaman of leprosy; however, his friend Gehazi gladly took Naaman's stuff, and for that, he got leprosy himself.

Jehu, king of Israel

And his captains threw their capes in the air, blew their trumpets and shouted "Jehu is king!"

  • Drives Like Crazy: His master the king recognized him (2 Kings 9:20) because he drives his chariot "like a madman."
  • Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: Among those he killed was his master's cousin, the king of Judah. This triggered Athaliah's purge.
  • The Purge: Killed Jezebel and all Baal priests as well as Ahab's relatives.
  • Well-Intentioned Extremist: Appointed by God to eradicate pagan worship in Israel, but his mass murders went far beyond what was expected of him.

Joash, king of Judah

Athaliah, queen of Judah

Hezekiah, king of Judah

  • Ill Guy: Once was this close to death...
  • Tragic Mistake: Showing Babylonian envoys all Judah's treasures put his nation on Babylon's hit list.

Josiah, king of Judah

  • Heroic BSOD: He found a "Book of the Law" (possibly Deuteronomy) and ripped his clothes and mourned because he realized how far his nation had forgotten its roots.
  • Shoot the Shaggy Dog: After he dies, his kingdom falls right back into the sinful practices he worked to end.
  • Tragic Mistake: Going to war with Egypt. He was killed in battle and Judah just couldn't recover.

Hosea

"Go and get married; your wife will be unfaithful, and your children will be just like her. In the same way my people have left me and became unfaithful."

Amos

"Let justice flow like a river, righteousness like a never-failing stream!"

Ezekiel

"They are a hard and obstinate people so I will make you as hard and obstinate as they."

  • Celebrity Is Overrated: People finally listened to Ezekiel when Jerusalem fell, but it was clear to him that they have still not taken God's words to heart.
  • Bunny-Ears Lawyer: At one point, Ezekiel makes a model of Jerusalem and besieges it in the city square for about fourteen months. Another time, he shaves his head and beard with a sword, then runs about town with a portion of the hair, hitting it with the sword.
  • Good Shepherd: He cultivated the image of God as a shepherd better than anyone.
  • Extreme Omnivore: Ate a scroll containing God's word. According to him, it tasted like honey.

Books of SamuelCharacters/LiteratureBook of Esther

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