Get Help With English Here

I have a problem with English grammar. I would be greatful for help with this edit. Beware the Nice Ones: Toward The Terra has Mu. They are peaceful race of humans with psychic powers, who are hunted down like animals and chased across the galaxy due to Fantastic Racism and Deus est Machina. Seeing [[spoiler: their new home destroyed along with their fellow Mu, whose telepathic scream they can hear, makes survivors declare war on humankind and turns their leader into The Unfettered. They successfully conquer one world after another, leaving planetary defense completely shattered, until humans finally mobilize all military forces and invite anti-Mu weaponry.

edited 9th Nov '11 2:44:01 PM by Ciabella

I would be greatful grateful for help with this edit. Beware the Nice Ones: Toward The Terra has the Mu. They are a peaceful race of humans with psychic powers, who are hunted down like animals and chased across the galaxy due to Fantastic Racism and Deus est Machina. Seeing [[spoiler: their new home destroyed along with their fellow Mu, whose telepathic scream they can hear, makes the survivors declare war on humankind and turns their leader into The Unfettered. They successfully conquer one world after another, leaving planetary defenses completely shattered, until humans finally mobilize all military forces and invite invent anti-Mu weaponry.

edited 9th Nov '11 3:13:38 PM by FrodoGoofballCoTV

Also, Toward The Terra should be italicized.

Thanks.

Italics are done with two single quotes. For example ''text'' is the proper markup to get text.

edited 9th Nov '11 9:28:13 PM by shimaspawn

Reality is that, which when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. -Philip K. Dick

I'm still not sure for these ones. Sorry to take your time but better to check than get banned one more time.

• The Unfettered// Jomy in Toward The Terra turns into one after destruction of Nazca. He leads the Mu to war, gives Tony the okay to kill surrendering soldiers and is ready to abandon a station full of Mu hostages. Many Mu feel disgusted by these actions. Fortunately, he gets better.

• Psychic Link// The Mu in Toward The Terra have semi-conscious telepathic link with each other. This means they can understand other person much better than ordinary human, but also leads to complication during the battle. The Mu are strongly distracted by death of their companions and hearing telepathic screams during destruction of Nazca turns Jomy into The Unfettered.

• Earth-Shattering Kaboom// Toward The Terra has two such cases.
  • Nazca, Mu’s new home, gets completely destroyed by Megido and even combined efforts of Blue, Jomy and Nazca Children aren't enough to prevent this.
  • The Earth almost gets shattered into million pieces, when the Grandmother decides its time to get rid of the Mu for good.

edited 9th Nov '11 10:26:01 PM by Ciabella

You're still forgetting some articles: a, an, and the. That's not unusual if you're not a native English speaker; many languages don't have them and it's difficult to remember. However, they are a vital part of English grammar.

• The Unfettered: Jomy in Toward The Terra turns into one after the destruction of Nazca. He leads the Mu to war, gives Tony the okay to kill surrendering soldiers and is ready to abandon a station full of Mu hostages. Many Mu feel disgusted by these actions. Fortunately, he gets better.

• Psychic Link: The Mu in Toward The Terra have a semi-conscious telepathic link with each other. This means they can understand the other person much better than an ordinary human, but also leads to complications during the battle. The Mu are strongly distracted by the death of their companions and hearing telepathic screams during the destruction of Nazca turns Jomy into The Unfettered.

• Earth-Shattering Kaboom: Toward The Terra has two such cases.
  • Nazca, Mu’s new home, gets completely destroyed by Megido and even the combined efforts of Blue, Jomy and the Nazca children aren't enough to prevent this.
  • The Earth almost gets shattered into a million pieces, when the Grandmother decides it's time to get rid of the Mu for good.

A few other things: I am wondering why you put // instead of colons as your example delimiter. Also, you missed a few plural nouns, and did the its/it's confusion thing. Lastly, unless "Nazca Children" is a proper noun, "children" doesn't need to be capitalized. If I may be so bold, what is your native language?

edited 10th Nov '11 4:48:31 PM by Fighteer

"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"

Thanks for help with these ones. I put // instead of colon, beacasue I only want to signalize, on which pages the edits will be made. They don't go to the Toward The Terra, but to Earth-Shattering Kaboom ect. I guess, I could have used colons, but I didn't think about it. My native language is Polish. We don't have things like a or the and use only three times. Your language can be a little confusing for Polish people. I will keep putting my edits on this page for some time, if you don't mind. Better to check than re-edit later. This way or another I will pay much more attension to articles.

edited 10th Nov '11 11:15:36 AM by Ciabella

Also, for the first post on the page, remember to close your spoiler (put ]] where it's not longer a spoiler.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

Ciabella, English can be confusing to native English speakers. (Your English is pretty good — orders of magnitude better than my Poish, for example.) And we don't mind if you keep putting your examples here — that's why we hang out here — to help out.

...if you don’t love you’re dead, and if you do, they’ll kill you for it.

YKTTW

Harem Shipping

Latonic: When the shippers think the hero should Marry Them All

edited 14th Nov '11 5:11:14 AM by RandomChaos

With the power of a dragon I can make up for my inability to spill.

Laconic, not "Latonic". And that sentence needs to end with a period.

As an aside, I strongly question the need for more Shipping Tropes.

"It's Occam's Shuriken! If the answer is elusive, never rule out ninjas!"

Villain Takes an Interest: Kohei Kakihara and Chiko from The Daughter Of Twenty Faces. Kakihara is fascinated by her fighting spirit. His obsession to take away everything Twenty ever had may have something to do with this as well.

The Daughter Of Twenty Faces: Foe Yay: Kohei Kakihara is obssesed with Twenty Faces to the point where he changes his apperance to look exactely like him and later tries to take Chiko under his wings. His main goal is to obtain Twenty's legancy, as he feels it was stolen from him a long time ago by Twenty himself.

edited 20th Nov '11 9:15:53 PM by Ciabella

Villain Takes an Interest: Kohei Kakihara and Chiko from The Daughter of Twenty Faces. (Work titles should be italicized.) Kakihara is fascinated by her fighting spirit. His obsession to take away everything Twenty ever had may have something to do with this as well.

Foe Yay: Kohei Kakihara is obsessed with Twenty Faces to the point where he changes his appearance to look exactly like him and later tries to take Chiko under his wing. His main goal is to obtain Twenty's legacy, as he feels it was stolen from him a long time ago by Twenty himself.

edited 21st Nov '11 5:05:46 PM by tombcannon

Also, it's obsession with, not obsession to. Prepositions are a pretty big deal with the English language; they specify the position of an idea in relation to another idea. 'Cat in the hat;' 'free until Sunday;' 'presents for you;' and so on. It can get to be hard to tell which preposition is the right word to use in some cases; most times, if you don't already know it, you have to either look it up, ask someone, or take a shot in the dark and guess.

Side note: a lot of people will tell you that it's bad grammar to end a sentence with a preposition. It's pretty much accepted as common knowledge, so if someone tells you that, it's best just to smile, thank them for correcting you, and ignore it.

I need a witty quote to put in here.

If you wanted to change the preposition like that, it's going to make the following verb take the gerund form. So the sentence should read, "His obsession with taking away everything Twenty...".

Ah, prepositions. The bane of learning a foreign language.

Thanks for help. Should I change that? Here are other edits I want to be sure about this time.

• Un Equal Rites : TuPreventTheWorldPeace has two opposite magical systems. There are magical girls, whose power comes from power item and born mages, who have their powers since birth and usually don’t need any additional artifacts. Other magic users consider magical girls system to be “cheating” mostly because it lets them get with being killed in transformed form. The fact that the former are considered Always Chaotic Evil and the latter Always Lawful Good, doesn’t help at all.
• Dawn of an Era: Subverted in Morrowind. After Player Character finally kills Dagoth Ur, not only it frees inhabitants of Vvardenfell from nightmares driving them insane and corruption that slowly changes its victims into one mass of a Body Horror, but basically brings peace between fighting fractions. Even with two demi-gods dead , which means End of an Age for the Tribunal, Vivec still decides to disband religious police and use his divine power to help these in need. Everything should be wonderful from this point, right? It turns out that striping Vivec from his powers causes Ministery of Truth to fall and Red Mountain to erupt, not even century after the events of the game.

edited 28th Nov '11 1:31:04 PM by Ciabella

• Unequal Rites: TuPreventTheWorldPeace has two opposite magical systems. There are magical girls, whose power comes from power items, and born mages, who have their powers since birth and usually don’t need any additional artifacts. Other magic users consider the magical girls system to be “cheating”, mostly because it lets them get with being killed in transformed form. The fact that the magical girls are considered Always Chaotic Evil and the mages Always Lawful Good, doesn’t help at all.

The part in red needs to be re-worked, but I'm really not sure what you're trying to say. If you could explain further, it would be appreciated.

The "former"/"latter" construction in the final sentence was grammatically correct. However, "former" and "latter" are generally only used to refer to things in the previous sentence; if the things being referred to are further removed than that, one generally restates the things.

• Dawn of an Era: Subverted in Morrowind. After the Player Character finally kills Dagoth Ur, he/she not only it frees the inhabitants of Vvardenfell from nightmares which were driving them insane and a corruption that which was slowly changinges its victims via into one mass of a Body Horror, but also basically brings peace between fighting fractions. Even with two demi-gods dead, which means the End of an Age for the Tribunal, Vivec still decides to disband the religious police and use his divine power to help these in need. Everything should be wonderful from this point on, right? It turns out that stripping Vivec of from his powers causes the Ministery of Truth to fall and Red Mountain to erupt, not even a century after the events of the game.

While the second sentence is grammatically correct, I would recommend rephrasing it to this to avoid the awkward "he/she" construction: After the Player Character finally kills Dagoth Ur, not only are the inhabitants of Vvardenfell freed from nightmares which were driving them insane and a corruption which was slowly changing its victims via Body Horror, but also several fighting factions basically reach peace.

As originally written, in the second sentence, the "he/she" construction is necessary because the player character is a person; a person is never referred to as an "it". I re-worded the section about the Body Horror because, on this wiki, Body Horror refers to a process, not a result.

If you have any questions about any of the other changes I made, please ask; I'd be happy to explain*

.

edited 28th Nov '11 2:49:01 PM by Nocturna

I want to add a WMG idea for. Mary Poppins. But I do not. If I should add they or their. So can you help me?

They isn't much of rules. As the members can do how they want it. And can leave how they want to. The only rule is. They must use it to help. Anther fact is. Bert still hadn't gained must skill at magic. Which is why we hadn't seen him use it much. So Mary was made to be his somewhat teacher.

There aren't much in the way of rules; the members can work how they want to and leave how they want to. The only rule is that they must use their magic to help the children.

Bert still hasn't gained much skill at magic, which is why we haven't seen him use it much. Mary is more or less his teacher.

---

If you want to know why I made any (or all) of the changes I did, ask*

.

I'd make that first clause "There aren't many rules." Much cleaner.

Video Game Census. Please contribute.

Thanks guy. However I had to change one thing. Mary's boss ordered Mary to be. His teacher. Though it is not her. Full time job. Which is why I said somewhat.

The sentances should not be split up that way. A better way of saying that might be:

Thanks, Nocturna. However, I had to change one thing: Mary's boss ordered Mary to be his teacher, though it is not her full time job, which is why I said, "somewhat".

Hi! Sorry I've not been here for a long time...Life got in the way.

I have a few things I'd like done for the Space Beasts article One is an edit...Under shout out I typed Falco's daughter was Rose...When I re-read that I Head banged because Rose is Falco's wife and his daughter is Garuda! So could you change Rose to Garuda?

Also just a few more tropes I'd like to add to Space Beasts.

Free Love Future: Inverted, nearly everyone in the universe seeks a monogamous marriage, Reasons for this vary, with the Aves their very biology prevents them from falling in love with anyone other then their first love because when they lose their virginity their bodies produce a chemical that bonds them permanently to their first mate. With Humans and Humanimals monogamy is encouraged because of the danger of radiation mutated ST Ds that are resistant to all antibiotics.

A Man is not a virgin: Averted Ichabod is in no rush to lose his virginity. (Makes sense because he's at the story's start he's only 13 years old.)

Sorry...Was booted off the computer and had to wait a while. Here are a few more tropes I'd like to add

Our Dragons are different: Many different varieties of Dragon Humanimal populate the universe. Belladonna Starchild is a typical Eastern Dragon, Tiamat is a Hydra (Despite being a Multiple Head Case she is considered quite a sex symbol)

Yiff: Mocked, Humanimals seem to be aware of the Furry Fandom, and really hate furries species stereotypes (E.G Rabbit People absolutely despise the stereotype they enjoy being eaten) And Humanimals in general don't like the Furry's depiction of animal sex, as Beauty the Snake Girl put it, "We do not YIFF! We make love" Mentioning Yiff around a Humanimal (Especially a Fox Humanimal) is a good way to get the stuffing beat out of you