Corrupt-a-wish.

Granted, it WAS blue, but now it's green thanks to a nuclear apocalypse.

I wish for TNP's head to explode.

Granted. You get banned from this thread for killing me.

I wish for overpopulation to stop.

Granted - Thanos kills half the universeStar Dream kills everyone in the universe.

I wish for the ability to create stars (like the sun) without harming myself, and the inability to change state of matter (so I won’t be converted to plasma by the star).

Granted. All the stars you create throw off everything near them. Killing thousands of alien life-forms.

I wish i had psychic powers.

Granted. The psychic powers come in the form of uncontrollable mind reading. And of course, A Mind Is a Terrible Thing to Read.

I wish we got a Pokemon game that's actually good.

Granted, it's a Fan Game that gets taken down and now nobody can play it.

I wish for the world's best sandwich.

Granted, The sandwich is indeed tasty but is infected with an an awful disease that gives you a 100% chance of death.

I wish for the power to bring dead memes back.

Granted, but somebody else ate it before you, so you'll never know what it tastes like.

I wish there was a show about untangling a massive Gambit Pileup.

Granted, but the Gambit Pileup ends up being so complex that the writers can't possibly resolve the plotlines so the show sucks and is cancelled after 0.9 seasons.

I wish that I could solve every problem in the world.

Granted, the world falls into the sun. You solved all the problems in the world because there’s no world for them to be in.

I wish for this wish not to be corrupted.

Granted. The genie instead removes your wish, and you, from existence and history to avoid a recursion paradox.

I wish for the ability to access a completely safe parallel reality where time does not map onto this reality for a period of ten hours at a time. (I just want to be able to sleep!)

Granted, but said reality is boring.

I wish Game Freak would give us a ghost-type Eeveelution.

Granted, but its stats really really suck so it's pretty worthless except to help fill your Pokedex.

I wish for a bottle of high-quality and delicious red wine.

Granted, you get arrested for drunk driving.

I wish to have a Character Menu irl.

Granted. all your options are terrible in every way.

I wish for the power to teleport.

Granted. You die every time it's used. (But you come back to life at your destination! Assuming no one moved anything.)

I wish for my lucky snorkel.

Granted. Its been destroyed beyond recognition.

I wish for a third eye.

Granted. It replaces your brain. You die.

I wish for the Master Crown.

Granted. its in an impenetrable box.

I wish for a can of sprite.

Granted but you die... somehow.

I wish to die.

Granted. You go to hell.

I wish i was rich.

Granted, you WERE rich. You are now poor, and too use to being rich to deal with it.

I wish for Missingno to corrupt this wish.

Graaaaaaa%^$£$&^% ghbrh;'[]# `!!48vn//*&^%$^^)(((***&&%^££"FG Gfhggv

I wish for the ability to save and reload in real life.

Edited by ArgonianLorekeeper on Oct 9th 2018 at 10:34:42 AM

Granted. You accidentally reload to before you had this ability and lose it permanently.

I wish humanity as a whole knew more about the universe.

Granted, We go mad from the Revelation.

I wish to have the leveling system from Skyrim apply to me in IRL.