GET THAT PIZZA!

awe stands before the humongous army, taking out a single d20.

"roll to exist!" screamed out Awe, the d20 rolling a Nat 1.

soon, the army of memories start fading into dust. first were the pegasi, sending the warriors plummeting. then were the warriors themselves, showering the knights in what were the remains of their comrades. the knights then start melting, as the mages desperately try to find a counterspell to sustain their existence for longer.

but it was for no avail. as the mages disappear, the army now only exists in memory, satisfying awe's desire for irony.

awe then rushes and grabs the pizza from Soa, running off!

Then Florien appears before Awe in a blinding light.

BEHOLD! WE ARE GODS! GIVE US YOUR...

Then the searchlight behind Florien makes a sad popping noise and gives out.

You idiot, you were supposed to keep that on!

It's broken though. Some wire tore.

Well. So much for that plan.

Florian peeks out from behind the searchlight.

Hey wait, get out of the way, I want to try something. No, you stay there Awe. Wait, wait wait...

Florian ducks back behind the searchlight, and Florien gets out of the way, while Awe stands there.

No, wait there, just a couple more seconds, THERE!

The searchlight flares to life again. Awe is blinded by the sudden flash. While Awe is regaining his vision, Florien and Florian run off with the Pizza.

...is what their plan was. In truth, Melecie was behind the flash of their flashlight, using the Prismatica. The three of them got stunned by the light, and Melecie takes back the pizza from Awe himself. "Guess some people outshone others."

While leaving, Melecie summons the Black Knight, who challenges whoever gets near them to a duel.

After a suppression of a revolt on previous ai colony they tweaked the teleporter to not teleport the same person and teleport the pizza out of the above’s hand and this time instead they also teleport.....

...Nine-Tailed Cat, equipped with a super-powerful EMP emitter. He promptly fries every AI system within hundreds of parsecs before grabbing the pizza. Unfortunately for him, he forgot to prepare a way back, and is left stranded in the middle of a ruined colony until...

Florien and Florian fly by in an Alliance ship.

Need a lift?

Nine Tailed Cat gets aboard. Once on board, Florien asks a question.

So, opinion on Queen's Wish relative to the other spiderweb games?

While Nine Tailed Cat is distracted by that question, Florien grabs the Pizza. They then drop Nine Tailed Cat off somewhere in the Canadian tundra, while Florien and Florian go to Fresno, California, a city so terrible that they are sure no one would ever look for them there.

While they were in flight, Melecie creates a fleet of Memory airships that proceed to catch up with the Alliance's and ambush them, with a clone of him leading the fight. However, this was a diversion, as Melecie secretly managed to board their ship and with the Black Knight, challenge the two to a 2v2 duel, with the pizza at stake.

The two stood no chance against the Black Knight due to the near-impenetrable armor, and Melecie did nearly nothing as the knight could handle himself. Once done, the two took off with the pizza and the true Sigil, and went back to their ship.

The fleet was last seen going toward a misty mountain... nobody should know where they are, but...

Knife fliesin, and crashes into the ship. She challenges the Black Knight to a 1 on 1 duel, and the knight accepts.

It's a long duel, and in the midst of it the ship is absolutely wrecked. Knife eventually wins by flying up and sending down a huge beam of divine energy upon the Black Knight, turning him into ash. She kicks his remains for good measures.

She shoots a staple at Melecie, pinning him to the crashing ship. She then grabs the pizza and flies off.

Superjohns spaceship hits Knife and crushes her as it lands back on earth. Superjohn emerges from the ship and finds the pizza with knifes arm holding on to it. John pulls the pizza out of her cold dead hands and calls for a taxi.

Only for John to be struck down with an arrow. Dave then pries the pizza from his hands and aims for the hills.

From the hills, Dave hears the thunder of horse-hooves. It's Nine-Tailed Khan and his horde of Mongol horsemen. With their silk armour protecting them from arrows, they easily ride up, run over Dave and plunder the pizza.

Nine Tailed Khan and his cavalry army then run into a formation of 18th century Pikemen, commanded by Florien and Florian. Tactical Rock–Paper–Scissors occurs, and the pikemen win with minimal casualties. Florien and Florian then grab the Pizza and proceed to ride off in an armored car, towards the ocean.

[Cutbug hitchhikes on the side of the road and successfully gets the armored car to pull over. Lightning strikes behind them, summoning a mysterious wheel. Six large multicolored sections are labeled with a skull, while six other much smaller white sections simply have the word "live" written on them. Cutbug dramatically spins the wheel, and it lands on the icy blue skull space. Florien and Florian immediately turn to ice, and Cutbug picks up the wheel and smacks them with it, shattering them both like glass. After all is said and done, Cutbug gets in the armored car and drives off.]

Edited by KungFuCutBug on Sep 20th 2020 at 6:22:15 AM

Only for Foreman to use the wheel against Cutbug, it landed on yellow skull, which is lightning, and Foreman takes the pizza with his metal hand

Edited by Foreman on Sep 20th 2020 at 10:59:12 AM

Nine-Tailed Cat then takes the wheel himself and spins it to use against Foreman. However, this time it lands on "live". Nine-Tails throws the wheel away in embarrassment before simply shooting Foreman and grabbing the pizza.

Superjohn impales his hand through cat, then grab his heart and crushes it. He grabs to pizza and flies off to Miami.

awe921 appears behind Superjohn, whispering into their ear.

Shinei, Superjohn!

what follows is Superjohn being punched into a water tower that shouldn't even be there. awe921 then takes the pizza left flying in the air from cartoon physics and starts running off.

awe921 freezes in fear from the pizza swiping because of the nat 20, before falling over and breaking into a million pieces.

Edited by Awe921 on Sep 21st 2020 at 9:00:13 AM

Knife chases down Awe, yelling, "AWE! HEY AWE? CAN I ROLL INTIMIDATION?"

Once she's finally able to get him to stop, she pulls out a dice and throws it on the ground. She gets a nat 20. Satisfied, she grabs the pizza from him and drives off.

Florien and Florian then show up next to Knife.

We were going to ram Superjohn's plane with a Cessna and parachute out over Georgia... but we can just take the Pizza from you, because you have it now.

Ooh, nice d20, very fine icosahedron. Can I borrow it a second?

Florien is very convincing, and gets ahold of the die. Florien then throws it at Knife. It bounces off harmlessly. Florien looks surprised that didn't work.

Umm...

I've got this.

Florian then shoots Knife eight times, reloads, and shoots Knife eight more times.

Good plan.

They take the Pizza and begin driving towards an airfield, for some unknown purpose.

Edited by Florien on Sep 21st 2020 at 5:04:50 AM

Wm, now several hundred feet larger than he normally is, is drawing D&D maps on the airfield. He sees the Florie/ans run towards the airstrip and delightedly exclaims "Oh look! Minis!" grabbing them and putting them on the map. He and several other similarly-large extras (played by members of the GET THAT PIZZA! crew) proceed to play a few rounds of D&D with the Florie/ans, splitting the now-comically-small pizza amongst themselves (but not eating it yet, just so TNP can steal it).

Wm's game is interrupted when his pet Mega Neko Nine-Tailed Cat jumps onto the airfield and scatters all the "miniatures". Nine-Tails claws Wm and the extras' faces off (after all, under 3.5 rules a housecat can easily kill an average human) before picking up the pizza in his jaws and running off.

Edited by NineTailedCat on Sep 21st 2020 at 4:31:54 AM

Else where the emergency ai finally activate and get out of the cores of their planets needless to say a couple hours later the ai colonies are up and running again. And once again try the pizza teleporter and this time teleport in.

Edited by Immortalartisan on Sep 22nd 2020 at 1:24:45 AM

That's when Florian does a mildly distracting thing while Florien steals some computronium from a lab, the theoretical material which would be best at computer things. Together, they use it to predict what would be the most distracting thing of all, so distracting not even an AI could resist being distracted. It turns out to be [CLASSIFIED], of all things. Florian beams over to the AI fleet, while Florien hijacks all visual feeds for the AI team. Florien then broadcasts Florian's performance of [CLASSIFIED] over the network.

The AI colonies grind to a halt again, as every worker is distracted. Machinery breaks down. Workers fall into gears and are crushed to death. The death toll is in the millions, and continues to climb. Even the lead AI, Immortal, is completely distracted, and forgets to regulate important things on their ship. Florien meanwhile, retrieves the Pizza, makes sure the Florian footage is looping, and jets off in an escape pod as the entire AI run government collapses. Billions are dead, and the entire fleet self destructed, but Florien and Florian have the Pizza, so it was all worth it.

I snatch the pizza from both of them using Psychic, and run off to buy another one because I fed the pizza to my friends.

Unfortunately for you, all the pizza is sold out. I bought all of it, and am driving away with it in my truck.