Fix a wish!

Granted, the only pain you feel is the icicle part, and the pain hurts as much as a light punch.

I wish the Soviet Union existed forever.

Granted: Someone had the bright idea to fund an exchange program with the US where everyone who prefers capitalism moves there and everyone who prefers communism moves to the USSR, and somehow the US agreed to this, and this actually ended up solving all problems both systems had.

I wish for the universe to implode!!! Ahahahaha!!!!

Granted. It's okay, though. It was some Expendable Alternate Universe where moles were the dominant species or something, and there were no children's card games. THE HORROR!!121!1!2!

I wish to be flat broke and have all of my contributions to society stolen and wasted by my government.

Granted. You are a Zen ascetic who doesn't need material possessions, and lack the attachment to the world to care about your own glory.

I wish for cancer.

Granted, it’s proved cannabis cures it.

I wish for a flood in my town.

Edited by The_Dag on Sep 22nd 2019 at 5:49:57 PM

Granted. The flood happens within the pipes that lead to the sinks, leaving more drinking water for your hometown

I wish that my dancing was not cool.

Granted. It’s hot instead.

I wish I was teleported into Gotham City at night, with all the criminals on the loose.

Granted. You are now Batman.

I wish for a no-deal Brexit.

Granted. There is no Brexit, eliminating the need for a deal.

I wish all television networks were owned by a single corporation.

Granted. I'll give you three guesses as to who the owner is. It's you.

I wish for a goose to attack me.

Granted. It attacks you with cuddles.

I wish for a kick up the arse.

Granted. [BOOT!] Huh, your spine looks a lot better aligned now.

I wish to be mildly annoyed.

Granted. The mild annoyance proves to be truly inspiring, and you write a novel that everyone reads and talks about.

I wish global warming significantly raised global sea level.

Granted. Now you finally have a use for that surfboard in your garage!

I wish that Tony Zaret would go viral due to racism.

Granted, it teaches everyone a valuable lesson about rejecting racism.

I wish I was stabbed in a butt.

Granted, but you don't feel pain and get regeneration powers.

I wish i'm a cat.

you become a cat. your concerns of your life is gone as you happily live with a good owner who cares for you very much.

i wish for a hat.

Granted, it’s a really amazing hat that doesn’t get stolen.

I wish for Trump do get re-elected.

Trump gets re-elected but major scandals get revealed. He's impeached and he goes to jail for high treason and stuff.

I wish I were an arsonist.

Granted. You burn down a mansion, sans most of the rich people stuff, and the people living in it, and they use they unburnt money to donate to the poor.

I wish for poor people to die.

Edited by Playing_with_boy on Nov 27th 2019 at 1:17:29 AM

Granted. They now exist like millionaires in the afterlife. Plus, there is no Celestial Bureaucracy!

Also, the rich people who made them poor get their due punishments in their afterlives, mostly first-class viewership of their prior wage victims.

I wish for another worldwide economic recession to happen today.

Granted. It lasts for like five seconds, and while it does have negative effects, the economy bounces back so quickly that it's ultimately insignificant in the long-run.

I wish to be transported into the universe of any of my fandoms...as my least favorite character (e.g. Dolores Umbridge, Amunet Black, or Mapleshade.)

Granted, except the character in question has gone through a major change and is now your number 1 favorite character.

In the same vein, I wish to go into my least favorite anime and video game universes.

You are granted powers to go the the fictional universe at will and you can come back at will as well. You have creative powers and you are able to improve whatever elements of the world that don't sit with you well. You'll be able to create the near-perfect fictional universe (from your perspective).

I wish poor people were able to Eat the Rich.

Edited by XFllo on Dec 7th 2019 at 6:52:56 PM

Granted. They turn out to be made of worms and both healthy and ethical.

I wish I forgot all about my exams.