"I'll Tell You How To Transport Gold Bullion"note , with the English title "Gold Smuggling 101". Released in 2003 by Geneon on Volume 1: The World's Most Wanted.
Lupin, Jigen and Goemon are enjoying a holiday in Switzerland, but Lupin is having little to no luck with his current operation: hitting on pretty girls. It proves especially daunting when the only candidate proves to be a mannequin used in a trap set by Zenigata. He escapes by forcing Zenigata into an impromptu Evil Knievel stunt with a speedboat and a pair of handcuffs, but the good detective is not easily thwarted, breaking into the gang's room to set up a new trap.
He will be waiting far longer when a mysterious couple swaps the numbers of Lupin's room and the one next door. Thus, Lupin and company enter the wrong room and land in the company of Fujiko and her mysterious, wheelchair-bound companion, who warn Lupin of Zenigata's trap. The two of them make a proposal: they want Lupin to assist them in a robbery. A large reserve of gold is sitting in the vaults of one of Switzerland's biggest banks, complete with elaborate security system. Complicating things, only the bank president can open the vault, via retinal scanner. However, all is not lost; there is an old sewer tunnel nearby that might be perfect for tunneling... After tricking Zenigata into his own trap, Lupin and the gang, plus their new partner head for the job.
Under the guise of a road crew, Lupin, Jigen, and Goemon manage to tunnel underneath the vault. Goemon cuts a hole in the floor, and the gold bars come pouring down. Using a conveyer belt, the men then transport the gold to the work truck, where Fujiko and her mystery partner load it on board. The thieves get away with the heist perfectly, further infuriating Zenigata, now freed from his net.
However, a new issue has come around: how to smuggle a ton of stolen gold out of Switzerland unnoticed. The mystery partner has a plan, however: he has the bars melted down and molded into a cast of the gang's work truck, which is promptly put on a chassis, hooked up to the workings, and painted to look like the real thing. However, Lupin, Jigen, and Goemon, impressed as they are by the plan, are also growing resentful they've had to do all of the work while Fujiko and the man in the wheelchair stand by and supervise.
All goes well at first; the thieves pass into France with no issues from the border guards. But at a roadblock soon after, Zenigata finally catches up to Lupin. He decides to search the truck for the missing gold, and opens up the back, only to be met by a massive inflatable balloon, courtesy of Fujiko, that not only pushes Pops away but, well... pops and releases pepper into the air, blinding Zenigata and the police with sneezes, and letting Lupin drive off. Deciding to change their destination to throw off Zenigata, they decide to take a long detour through Italy on their way to Nice.
Even with the precautions, Zenigata manages to catch up with them again, and this time manages to shoot and blow out one of the truck's tires. Lupin veers off road and into a deep set of woods. He proposes that the group leave the truck to hide, split up to throw Pops off their trail and come back for it at night when things have calmed down. Fujiko and her "friend" go off in one direction while Lupin, Jigen and Goemon head in the other, pursued by Zenigata. They are forced to jump off a cliff into the sea; Zenigata, ever determined, follows. However, it turns out the crooks have managed to grab a root protruding from the cliff side, and bemusedly watch Zenigata, still issuing threats, plummets into the water below. As they dangle, Goemon voices his suspicion that Fujiko's mystery pal has been tipping Zenigata off to their travels. While Jigen agrees, Lupin decides to hold the debate off until they can get back to the truck.
That night, the gang returns to the spot they left the truck, relieved to find it still there. However, complications come in the form of Zenigata hiding inside, knowing the details of their plan, and the revelation that the gold truck was at some point switched out for a regular truck. While Zenigata laughs at this twist of fate, the three slip away, searching for their former "partners."
Meanwhile, in Nice, Fujiko and her companion toast their victory. However, her partner quickly reveals he's not only drugged Fujiko's brandy so he can take all of the gold. As Fujiko passes out, he doesn't need his wheelchair, but beneath a disguise, he is the president of the very bank they robbed! He drives off, unaware the Lupin, Jigen, and Goemon have finally dragged themselves into town. Jigen spots the van; Lupin dismisses it as one of hundred of others in town that look just like it until the bank president gets out Fujiko and Zenigata also show up shortly thereafter; in the ensuing chaos, Lupin pushes the real culprit at Zenigata, but Fujiko has already leapt into the golden van. The rest of the Lupin gang leap into Fujiko's now abandoned car, and Zenigata on top of that while the police take care of the bank president. As the two screech around the harbor of Nice, Fujiko loses control of the golden van, plunging it and her into the water.
As the surviving members of Lupin's gang sit on a nearby boat and watch the police pull the golden van up from the seafloor, Lupin sadly mourns over Fujiko. Her voice then sounds from beside the boat... she managed to survive the crash! Jigen and Goemon are firmly against letting her on the boat, but she shamelessly tells them she's ashamed. Lupin eventually wears them down and they let her on board. After all, they may not have gotten the loot, but for better or worse, Lupin still has Fujiko.
This episode features examples of:
- Absurdly Sharp Blade:
- There is no need for retinal scanners when you have Zantetsuken!
- Goemon also easily slices a piece off the van, leading to the discovery that the gold van was switched out with a normal one. In the English version, it's out of annoyance they've been discovered; in the Japanese version, it's because he wants a "small souvenir."
- Affectionate Nickname: As Lupin tries to persuade Jigen and Goemon to forgive Fujiko for her scheming, he calls them "Ji-ji" and "Go-go." In the original Japanese, he simply goes for Jigen-chan and Goemon-chan.
- By-the-Book Cop: Zenigata does a rare Aversion; he reluctantly picks the lock to Lupin's room to set up his trap, grumbling "it takes a thief..."
- Caper Crew: This episode plays around with the usual arrangement for Lupin's gang. Thanks to their new "friend," Lupin is shifted from his usual Mastermind role into a combination of Driver and Muscle, which he seems resentful of. Him trying to reassert his usual role actually plays right into Fujiko and her partner's hands.
- Caught in a Snare: Zenigata's trap involves a portable indoor spring net and frame to snag Lupin and pals. Shame Lupin tricked him into getting into it himself...
- Chronic Backstabbing Disorder: What? Fujiko tricked Lupin to run off with the loot? What, after she finds out she's been tricked and tracks down the guy and the loot, she tries to run off with all of it for herself again?
- Easily Forgiven: While Jigen and Goemon are willing to let Fujiko rot in the water for her treachery, Lupin quickly gets over everything she did and welcomes her aboard their boat.
- Foreshadowing: Lupin's casual "nice schnoz" when he sees the bank president's picture is a tip off of Fujiko's disguised companion's true identity...
- Gravity Is a Harsh Mistress: Zenigata starts diving, stops dead when he spots the gang holding on to a root halfway down the cliff, and then flails to grab the root before finishing his plummet into the sea.
- Impact Silhouette: A variant where Lupin leaves one when he slips off the top of the gold truck and into its freshly painted surface.
- No Honor Among Thieves: Goemon practically points this out after realizing Fujiko's partner was tipping off Zenigata.Goemon: Well, so much for the proverbial honor among thieves.
- No Name Given: For such a central character, Fujiko's partner in crime is never given a proper name in either the Japanese or English versions. The closest he gets is "the bank president" after his disguise is revealed.
- Obfuscating Disability: Fujiko's partner uses a wheelchair to appear weak and frail so he doesn't have to do any of the work... and to make it harder for Lupin and company to track him down since they don't know he can really walk. Too bad he couldn't wait until Fujiko was entirely unconscious...
- Pepper Sneeze: The trick balloon Fujiko inflates in the back of the truck is full of pepper. When it finally pops, the spice causes Zenigata and the police to sneeze long enough for the gang to get away.
- Pop the Tires: Zenigata does this to the golden truck, forcing Lupin and the golden van off road. This forces Lupin to act as a decoy and allows Fujiko to switch out the vans.
- Pun: As Goemon laments they've lost the loot again, Jigen grumbles "Don't rub it in," just as Lupin is doing exactly that with some sunscreen on Fujiko's back.
- Shout-Out: With his large nose and shaggy hair, Lupin dubs the man "Ringo" before he can introduce himself.
- Talk Like a Pirate: When Lupin boards his would-be paramour's ship, he begins to chat her up with a bit of this before declaring himself a "bikini inspector."
- Undesirable Prize: For all their hard work and effort, what do the trio get at the end? Fujiko. Lupin might be pleased with it, but not Jigen and Goemon.Goemon: So, Zenigata gets the gold and we get the girl.Jigen: Ugh! Don't rub it in!
