Funny / Worzel Gummidge

Season 1

• "Worzel's Washing Day": When Worzel meets John, John asks him to sit down, but Worzel has forgotten how.
• "A Home Fit for Scarecrows":
  • Worzel saying, "Property" instead of "Properly".
  • When John wants to know where Worzel's bathroom is, Worzel says that there isn't one because scarecrows don't take baths.
  • Worzel pickles his singing head, probably as a pun on the term "pickled" meaning drunk, and the idea of a Drunken Song.
  • When Worzel teaches the kids in song how to spell his name in "Worzelese" (a code involving spelling and putting syllables between each letter), it ends in an Astonishingly Appropriate Interruption.
    Worzel: "And you're left with—"
    Kids: "Worzel!"
  • Worzel denying Sue's offer to have him sit by the electric fire because "Electric's bad enough. Fire's even worse! Put the two of them together and you never know what might happen!".
• "Aunt Sally":
  • Worzel reading "1st" as "one-st".
  • Aunt Sally denying she was "blubbering" because "ladies don't blubber; ladies weep".
  • When Mrs. Bloomsbury Barton claims she "carries a lot of weight" in the county, Mr. Peters replies, "That's for sure". Later, when she meets Worzel, he tries to teach her to sub for him.
  • Aunt Sally calling America a "vulgar town".
• "A Little Learning": Even though Worzel is very clever when he's wearing his "thinking" head, he still has his irreverent personality, as shown when he sticks his tongue out and says, "Ask me another!" after answering the teacher's trivia questions.
• "The Scarecrow Hop":
  • When Aunt Sally is being fired, she asks for wages and a reference.
  • When Sally claims she was tossed by a bull, Worzel claims that if that bull had been a bird, he would have plucked him.
  • The last step of the eponymous dance is for one dancer to kick their partner on the butt.

Season 2

• In "Worzel and the Saucy Nancy", Aunt Sally tries to pretend she was floating to Egypt and that's why she was in the ocean.
• "Worzel's Nephew":
  • Mrs. Bloomsbury Barton and her maid Enid find a pin. Bloomsbury Barton wants to have Enid pick it up because of the Nursery Rhyme "See a pin, pick it up, and all the day you'll have good luck". Then, she decides to pick it up herself, realising that if Enid picked it up, she'd get the luck. Bloomsbury Barton bends down but then is slingshotted in the behind by Pickles and yells that she was "molested", "assaulted", and "shot". Enid asks where Bloomsbury Barton got shot, but she's too shy to say and eventually accuses her of impertenance.
  • Pickles keeps using rhyming slang and threatening to throw Worzel onto the compost heap. So when Harry says that he's "earning [his] keep", Worzel assumes this is another slang term for compost heap.
• "A Fishy Tale":
  • When Worzel sees some fishermen, he assumes (since they're being still) that they're trying to be scarecrows, so he decides to try to be a human.
  • Worzel trying to "wangle" (i.e. angle) in Mrs. Bloomsbury Barton's pond. When Enid sees him, they strike up a conversation, during which she thinks "Worzelese" is French. Later, when she tells Bloomsbury Barton about it:
    Mrs. Bloomsbury Barton: "Wangling?! Is that what you call putting a pane of glass into a greenhouse?!"
    Enid: "No, ma'am. It's what he calls poking around in the bottom of a pond with a stick."
  • When Worzel is asked to have a look at Mrs. Bloomsbury Barton's dishwasher, he mishears it as "mish masher", then when he sees the aquarium, he assumes she meant "fishwasher" and stares at it.
• "The Trial of Worzel Gummidge":
  • When Aunt Sally, who is being the prosecutor, asks Worzel if he threw the potato at the Crow Man on purpose, and he denies it, she replies, "Are you denying that this is a potato?".
  • Sgt. Beetroot tries to use a watch, but can't, so he just says that the Crow Man has been gone for "a long time".
• This conversation in "Very Good, Worzel":
  Worzel: "What happened to the sausages?!"
  Aunt Sally: "I ate them."
  Worzel: "What?! All million of them?!"
  Aunt Sally: "There wasn't a million, silly! There was only... um... three."
  Worzel: "It ain't true; there was more than three! There was three and three and another three and another three and another three."^note Fifteen
• "Worzel in the Limelight":
  • Worzel calling the TV a "telly-welly" and wondering how the people get into it.
  • Aunt Sally trying to be Worzel's dummy but they mess up the joke ("What do you get when you cross a bull with a lettuce? Tossed salad") because Sally mispronounces "bull" as "gull" and then Worzel forgets the punchline.
• In "The Scarecrow Wedding":
  • Aunt Sally stuck upside down in an old washing machine, which she insists on calling a "domestic cleaning appliance".
  • Aunt Sally imagining she's marrying the Arch Duke of Romania, Bulgaria, and Most of Egypt.^note Quite apart from all these countries' monarchies having been abolished decades ago, none of their royal families ever used Archduke as a title.
  • The reveal that Aunt Sally's full name is "Roll Up Roll Up Three Balls a Penny Sally".
  • Worzel threatening to knock Pickles's head off if Pickles knocks his head off.

Season 3

• In "Moving On", Worzel doesn't want to tell Aunt Sally that they are having sausages for breakfast, for fear of scaring a nearby pig.
• "A Fair Old Pullover": Worzel thinking that a fair isle pullover is called a "fair old" pullover and that because it's a "giveaway bargain", that means it's free.
• "Worzel the Brave":
  • When Col. Bloodstock threatens to put Worzel "under fire", Worzel freaks out, believing he will set him on fire.
  • Mr. Peters calling Aunt Sally an "Auntie Annie" and an "Auntie Nancy".
• "Worzel's Wager":
  • When Mr. Peters is "seeing a man about a dog", this initially seems like he's just going to the bar as usual. But then, it turns out that he's doing dog training with Harry.
  • The Crow Man using Loophole Abuse by saying that, since he apparently has Psychic Powers, betting that there'll be snow on the town hall roof the next Christmas isn't technically gambling.
• "The Return of Dafthead":
  • Dafthead thinking that the Old McDonald lyrics are "Old McDonald is a farm".
  • Worzel trying to trick Dafthead, but falling for his own tricks.
• "Choir Practice":
  • Worzel thinking a graveyard is called a "gravy yard".
  • Worzel and Aunt Sally's version of "All Things Bright and Beautiful":
    Aunt Sally: "You dirty, filthy scarecrow, what are you doing here?"
    Worzel: "To get some grub and a picnic and a bottle of ginger beer."
    Aunt Sally: "I'll make you feel so sorry you'll wish you never came."
    Worzel: "I'll boot you up to the back of the church and boot you back again."

Season 4

• "Muvver's Day":
  • Sue thinking Worzel will get pneumonia from falling into the pond, even though that's not how you get pneumonia, and, as John points out, he's a scarecrow.
  • Worzel refusing to say, "Please may I get down?", thinking it doesn't make sense as he wants to get up.
• "The Jumbly Sale": Aunt Sally trying to save face when she is stuck upside down by saying that it's the "latest fashion". Then, she asks to be righted.
  Worzel: "I thought having your legs sticking in the air was the latest fusion."
  Aunt Sally: "Fashion! And it was then, but it isn't now! Fashions change!"
• "Will the Real Aunt Sally...?":
  • Aunt Sally II is determined to be the doppelganger, because she said, "Thank you".
  • Aunt Sally II eating the flowers Worzel gave her.
• "Worzel's Birthday":
  • Worzel explaining that scarecrows have six birthdays — one for each limb, one for the stomach, and the 'Bestest Birthday', which is for the head.
  • When Aunt Sally says that she won't be caught dead at Worzel's birthday party, he tells her that she wouldn't want to come to the party dead, because then she couldn't eat the food.