One day, you are a normal person having a normal life. The next, you are suddenly stuck in the body of a warrior king. And you know what's going to happen in the future of that king.
That's how A Game of Kings and SIs
by gladius begins, with the author writing about what would happen if he suddenly woke up as Robert Baratheon the day he married Cersei Lannister.
The books in mind, he immediately begins to turn his life around, seeking to (a) make well damn sure that the events in the books do not happen, (b) preparing Westeros for the future war against the White Walkers and (c) get the Seven Kingdoms out of the medieval hellhole it is. But, of course, even this is not enough to put a stopper to the Game of Thrones, and Gladius!Robert may find himself somewhat out of his depth...
As AlternateHistory.com requires an account, the fanfic can also be found on Spacebattles.
This fanfic contains examples of:
- Adaptational Heroism: Cersei. This Robert actually pays her attention, hears her ideas and takes them into account when making decisions, gives her a certain amount of power and leeway and even consents to arrange combat lessons for her. All of this together along with the occasional thoughtful gift and the certainty of Robert's fidelity means Cersei feels genuinely happy as Queen, ensuring her loyalty and marital joy. She's still arrogant and petty, but having the means and support to fulfil her ambitions makes her generally a much more pleasant person.
- Adaptation Relationship Overhaul: Between Stannis and Robert, since the latter gives Stannis the informed choice between ruling Dragonstone or Storm's End and avoids humiliating him in the same way canon Robert did by seducing Delena Florent. After seeing the state of the island, Stannis chooses Storm's End, averting the vitriol he harbored in canon towards his brother, leaving them with much more cordial relations, even if he is still annoyed by the way Robert publicizes himself.
- Arranged Marriage: Between Stannis Baratheon and Delena Florent.
- Badass Army:
- The Warhammers, a professional force loyal to the crown, established by Robert, trained by Ser Vollen Tyrek and comprising of Pikemen, Crossbowmen and Longbowmen. Sandor Clegane joins them.
- The Kingsguard, meanwhile, get expanded from seven members to forty-nine.
- Because You Were Nice to Me: Sandor Clegane joins Robert's army, in part in gratitude for getting his brother killed.
- Beleaguered Assistant: Lord Eldon Estermont, the Master of Coin, is often seen fretting about the expenses of Robert's ideas.
- Blackmail Backfire: Varys tried to bribe Ser Lyn Corbray so he would betray Robert, threatening to reveal his homosexuality. Unfortunately for him, Corbray instead told Robert about both little tidbits... and he cared far more about the potential treason than what Corbray did on his own time.
- Bodyguard Betrayal: Ser Arrec Staedmon attempts to kill Robert when he tells Varys that they have found his spy network.
- Boring, but Practical: Robert introduces a large amount of bureaucracy and paperwork to heavily curb the corruption in the Red Keep, including the local version of the Doomsday Book and double entry bookkeeping to increase his control over the realm's finances.
- Curbstomp Battle: The Battle of Barrowbridge lasts for all of one day and ends in a complete rout of the Targaryen loyalists, at the cost of less than a hundred and fifty of Robert's troops.
- Didn't See That Coming: Varys gets caught when the death of a corrupt Goldcloak allows the honest ones to discover his plotting to bring "little birds" to Westeros.
- Foil: Robert in this story is this to Aerys II, who also had ambitious development plans of his own. The difference is that Aerys's were ostentatious monuments that became Fleeting Passionate Hobbies, in comparison to which, Robert's plans are far more Boring, but Practical, and he follows through on them.
- From Camouflage to Criminal: The Warhammers are formed in an attempt to avert this.
- Giving Radio to the Romans: Robert introduces a boatload of ideas (printing press, concrete, gunpowder, balloons, steel mills...) but, to avoid attention, passes them off as coming from ancient books studied by one of his men. Notably, Jon Arryn realizes there's something strange about the many inventions - had they really been ancient, their sheer potential would have kept them active, and the fact that there's no indication of anyone trying to further develop them means they can't be as useful as they appear. Robert's forced to acknowledge Jon's very reasonable doubts and invent a story to both placate him and convince him to keep promoting the ideas.
- Happily Married: Robert prioritizes Cersei's pleasure when having sex, something no one other than Jaime did before. This, along with little fidelity tests and the power Robert grants her, gradually leads her to become more faithful to Robert and ultimately admit that her and Jaime's incest cannot continue.
- Heel–Face Turn: Cersei and Jaime realize they cannot continue with their affair, because both of them feel awful at their betrayal of Robert - whom both respect.
- Heel Realization:
- Robert comes up and apologizes for his past actions.
- It does not take long into her marriage for Cersei and Jaime to realize that what they had has vanished.
- Heroic Bastard: Rowan Storm, the new Lord Commander of the Goldcloaks, who is working to put an end to the corruption in the King's Landing City Watch.
- He's Back!: In the eyes of everyone in Westeros, this is what has happened after Gladius takes over.
- Hypocrisy Nod: Robert tells Jon that he does not want the Maesters working with the Maidenvault's books, because they will likely hoard it all to conserve their power - and mentally lampshades that he is also keeping a lot of knowledge in secret.
- La Résistance: Led by Lords Cressey and Thorne to overthrow Robert and restore the Targaryens to power.
- Manly Tears: Bronze Yohn Royce on having Lamentation returned to his House.
- Oh, Crap!:
- Gladius when he realizes he has become Robert.
- When the first reports of wildfire explosions come in.
- Varys when Robert reveals that they have found his "little birds" spy network, and when Robert asks about the false Aegon.
- Pay Evil unto Evil: Robert has no problem at all in having Clegane and Lorch dead or sent to Dorne for their murder of Rhaegar's wife and children.
- Realpolitik: As a way to ingratiate himself to Tywin enough to persuade him to give up Amory Lorch and Gregor Clegane as a means of appeasing Dorne, Robert consults Ser Barristan and finds a legal loophole allowing him to present the offer to Jaime to leave the Kingsguard with no strings attached and no loss of honor. Tywin nearly falls over handing them over, though Jaime still chooses to remain a Kingsguard.
- Red Baron: In addition to his canon nickname of "The Demon of the Trident", Robert becomes known as "The Dragonslayer" and "The Extinguisher".
- Royals Who Actually Do Something:
- Robert, of course. Not only as a warrior, but also when some of the wildfire buried under King's Landing explodes, causing a large fire.
- Cersei, who actually begins to enjoy some of Robert's ideas - she is in charge of the construction of Westeros' first balloon, for example.
- Self-Insert Fic: The author as Robert Baratheon.
- Shout-Out:
- When SI!Robert looks for the first time into the Maidenvault's hidden chamber, and Ser Davos asks him if he sees anything, he replies as Howard Carter did when he first looked into Tutankhamun's tomb: "Yes, wonderful things."
- Robert compares the Maesters to ComStar and the Adeptus Mechanicum.
- Steel Mill: Tobho Mott, as the new Royal Armorer, visits Robert's Crown Steelworks at the Blackwater to see the construction of the immense steel mill there. Impressed with how the Westerosi have managed to remove the need for slave work with the aid of the waterwheels, he pairs with Donal Noye to make suggestions and improvements based in his experience in Qohor.
- Was It Really Worth It?: Robert's question to Lord Thorne.
- The Watson: Jon Arryn becomes this to Robert, especially when he returns from Dorne.
- Wham Line:
- Chapter 4 (iv):
Ser Barristan Selmy: There's a fire, Your Grace, in one of the neighbourhoods north east of the Dragonpit. We don't know how it got started, but it's spreading ... and ... the flames are green, Your Grace.- Chapter 11 (iii):
No, the reason I was having trouble sleeping was because when I had touched that damned, fucking dragon’s egg... the bloody thing had felt warm to the touch.
