Let's Liveblog SonicShadowX Because I Have Lost All Senses

Due to Bile Fascination and the ugly resurfacing of this terrible fan-series, I will live bloginate Sonic-Shadow X, though I think the title should have been "Gothica X" if she wants to be honest.

We open with "His World" by Zebrahead, as an Eggman Screenshot from Sonic X is trying to find out what his grandpa was talking about, and I'm sure by that he means in his old journal, since Dr. Gerald Robotnik is sorta DEAD.

"What the-?", my thoughts mirror yours exactly, Eggman, as what appears to be Shadow in drag gets out of a pod. If you are the least bit interested in Sonic, you should know that this scene mirrors Shadow's own introduction. Thus further pushing the fact that she is just Shadow Gender Flipped and with a stupid name.

And even Eggman thinks that Gothica is Shadow, though I think he should have continued his sentence with "and why are you wearing women's clothing?!"

We see a full frame of Gothica, she introduces herself as Shadow's sister, and asks what he wishes of her. Just. Like. Shadow. Let me make it clear that I have an Oc who is Shadow's half-sister, since she was made by Black Doom with a bigger blood sample and with a Saluki tail, however, she is not a skanky recolor and doesn't fuck with continuity.

Eggman orders her to find Sonic and "eliminate" him. Knowing that later in the series, she has a Chaos Power that is basically a more powerful Chaos Spear in a tornado and with a shield around herself, Sonic should have been killed and make his place in the title even less relevant. Though it could be argued with her learning it later, but no episodes show her learning it...

Whatever, the title card shows, and it's just a card of Sonic on the left and Shadow on the right with the title in the middle, from the episodes that I've seen, this title card never changes. It shows black text on a pink background saying "Station Square, That Night...", why she waited until night to do this is never explained since she can fucking teleport.

Sonic sees a bright flash and Shadow is on top of a destroyed mech. It's actually Gothica, but she didn't even bother giving her the garish outfit. I mean, how could you not be able to see bright pink at night? Sonic assumes she's Shadow, because, well, she is just with more emo and a Mary Sue. She corrects him, pointing out that she has boobs, and introduces herself.

Sonic does a Parrot Exposition and Gothica kicks him in the back of the head. Why don't you use Chaos Powers? If you want to assassinate him, do it quickly. Though seeing the later episodes, she has a crush on him, but it isn't quite Fridge Brilliance because she still kicked him in the back of the head, and the romance was sudden, to say the least.

Sonic then asks, "What are you?" in-universe answer would be Shadow's older sister who has many forms and is stronger than him. The out-of-universe answer would be Shadow's skank sister who is a God-Mode Sue, Copy Cat Sue, Relationship Sue, and Black Hole Sue. Sonic runs away from her because she told him to, and Shadow appears with a Chaos Control and an obviously edited mouth. Speaking of mouths, Gothica appears to have had a stroke.

Then it shows Shadow asking, "So, what's my big sister up to this time?" the space between 'big' and 'sister' is as close as I could get to how it is in the video. The reason it's like that is because Gothica was supposed to be Shadow's little sister, but instead of redoing the text, she just deleted 'little' and put 'big' in there, and she didn't move the 'sister' closer to the 'big', so it's just awful.

The episode ends with these questions, and you know what that means? It's time for "Questions That Don't Even Try"!

What's Gothica planning?

To kill Sonic, duh.

Can Sonic uncover the truth?

If you're talking about the truth of her plan, isn't it obvious that she wants him dead? If you're talking about the secret behind her, Episode Three is just exposition.

Why am I asking you?

Because you can't think of any other way to end the video other than the cheesy "Adam-West Batman" style?

Anyone can join in if they want to.

edited 23rd Oct '10 12:25:08 PM by AwesomeZombie22

[[youtube:Hf9WSJ24VaI&p]]

The video spends 26 seconds out of it's 1:51 run recapping an episode that was 2:44 long. Also, the first episode is probably the longest one we're gonna see.

Sonic cowers in the corner, saying to himself, "Who are you, Gothica?" come on, man. She told you that she was Shadow's sister, do you really want this to get even more confusing for us? Tails and Amy are concerned about his behavior and exposit that he's been like that for two days straight. Sonic tells them that he's okay, despite being in a Madness Mantra for two days. "Amy, Sonic's been acting weird." No shit, Sherlock. What I'm wondering is why Sonic is going in this phase instead of going to Shadow for information.

Amy thinks it must be Gothica's fault, once again, no shit, Sherlock. He's been in a corner for two days muttering about Gothica, of course she has something to do with it! Some weird editing has been done in the next picture. Amy seems to have a goatee and both of their mouths are obvious edits. The next frame is HOLY SHIT. That is quite possibly the worst edit in this entire series. You can see the white outlines of the picture and the background is the laziest thing you can do in MS Paint!

Amy says that they were talking about a black and pink hedgehog (how the hell Amy knows what she looks like, I have no idea), and the Amy recolor states that Gothica is her sister. But. No. How. What. No. That does not happen! If Gothica is a project made in the Space Colony ARK, where nobody on board goes to Earth, how can Becca have flashbacks of being on Earth later on?! Not to mention that Shadow and the Biolizard were made with Black Doom's blood! How!? What!? Where!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! *wheeze* Okay, I'm back. Becca states that they stopped talking after Shadow was made for some stupid reason that I'm sure will never be explained.

Does Becca know the truth about Gothica?

I'm assuming yes, since, you know, SHE'S HER FUCKING SISTER.

edited 23rd Oct '10 12:34:05 PM by AwesomeZombie22

Godspeed, Awesome Zombie...or I suppose Sciencespeed, if you're not a fairly religious person. This is apparently (as I like sanity too much to dare press play on those videos) one doozy of a trainwreck you're going through, and I hope you'll come out of this alive...or at least undead, considering your username.

[[youtube:h4hTGeyABL8&p]]

Linkin Park music? I know people will flame me for this, but I don't hate Linkin Park. The songs are just overused on Youtube and every character with a Dark and Troubled Past gets at least twelve AMVs using a Linkin Park song.

Anyway, Shadow stares out into nothingness for no given reason, while Gothica exposits that Shadow did something to her 50 years ago. Well, at least the author knows that Shadow is Older Than He Looks. Gothica further angsts to herself saying, "I'll never forget what happened..." NEVAR FORGET, you say? These next two screenshots... They're so awful and there is no excuse for it.

The screenshots are unedited, they both show Shadow and Maria, but Maria insists that Shadow is Gothica. If you thought the scene where she didn't edit Shadow from a distance was bad, this is worse. There isn't the excuse like "It was too far away" or anything! She was too lazy to make a lazy recolor, and It Gets Worse. Just... let that sink in for a moment there.

HOLY CRAP THAT BOX IS HUGE. Seriously, do you need that much space for a text box? You could repeat what she's saying and it'd still fit the space is so large! Now, time for my Continuity Alarm. Shadow was created as the Ultimate Life Form, but since Gerald refused to use Shadow for warfare, everyone in the ARK was murdered. Now, Gothica is also not being used for warfare, yet is Shadow's prototype. But once Shadow is made, the shit hits the fan. Why? There is no explanation.

Also, why the fuck does Gothica put the blame on Shadow? Sure, for some reason his mere existence made everyone in the ARK get killed, but that's like blaming the baby for Death by Childbirth. He didn't have any control over it! Did Gothica honestly think that Shadow wanted Maria to die? Seriously, what a bitch.

Once again, going back to my character, Kathy was made on the Black Comet by Black Doom alone, he wanted to perfect the Ultimate Lifeform Project, but due to Kathy finding out his plans and plotting to attack him from the inside, had to lock her up in a pod which was recovered by Tails some time during Shadow The Hedgehog before the Black Comet was destroyed. See? No continuity errors in her story, WHY ARE THERE SO DAMN MANY IN GOTHICA'S!?

Anywho, Shadow rudely interrupts Gothica's angsting and she tells him that she needs time alone to angst. Oh, and there aren't any stupid questions in this episode, and I can't really think of any, so yeah.

edited 23rd Oct '10 11:32:50 PM by AwesomeZombie22

Oh hey, I remember comment trolling that first video. =d

Good times, good times.

The recap is really short, just six seconds of Gothica saying that she needs time alone. Which also makes it entirely pointless. So we go to the next frame and HOLY CRAP, WHAT ARE YOU DOING. Look at her! She took her shirt and skirt off! Now she's become even more Stripperiffic! I don't even know why the "artist" drew it like that! What did she do while she was alone? Wait, I don't wanna know. Anyway, she sees Rouge hacking into something, and rushes towards her in a way that looks really, really, awful.

There's a pointless frame where Gothica just looks intimidating, or as intimidating as an anthropomorphic hedgehog who looks like a hooker can be, and, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, the absolute worst screenshot in this series, remember, I said screenshot. Let's analyse this for a moment, shall we? The first thing that catches the eye is the gray box that says GOTHICA on it. This shows signs of two dimensional thinking. Clearly, the rest of the computer screen's windows are light blue. She didn't even try to do something as simple as the color extracting tool, or even clicking on a blue color on the pallet.

Next is the textbox. It's enormous, and she could have cropped out the ample space or tried to redo the text box again, and the text-to-box ratio is off the charts! If you thought the scene in the third episode where you could repeat the paragraph twice was bad, at least it was a paragraph. This is a very simple three word sentence and I actually opened Kolorpaint and found out that it could be repeated 6 and a half times. I am in awe of the sheer laziness.

The next frame is Rouge saying "you're not what I expected", though what can you expect with what's basically an even more emo tranny Shadow? Also, the mouth is an obvious edit and doesn't even look like it was from Sonic X. Then there's a Beat, and Shadow appears, informing Gothica that the author cannot spell vicinity. Gothica has a little Luminescent Blush (my older sister said it looked more like she was scratched), so now she's a Tsundere, and the relationship is more forced than any relationship Bella has ever had.

It cuts to a frame showing Sonic and Tails in a plane, Sonic saying that he's coming for her, 3...4... better lock the door, 5...6... grab a crucifix,... oh, sorry. Anywho, Shadow does an overly dramatic anime pose and says that he will see her true form, which would be a gigantic mass of evil and hatred if this story resembled the truth, Gothica responds with another overdramatic anime pose as she has a Big "NO!" moment. When I first saw this, I had no idea what the fuck happened, but I'll save the rant for the next part where the exposition happens. Anyway, Sonic has a weird mouth and apparently, they want to kidnap Gothica or some bullcrap, then Sonic and Shadow appear in a room with treadmills for no given reason, cut to a Beat, then Gothica is in space, and instead of the Shadow recolor, we get a dumb Amy recolor, and she wishes that Sonic never sees her like this. Okay, why? Getting past the fact that they only shared a few minutes together, wouldn't looking like his kind-of girlfriend get you closer to him? Looking like a tranny version of his rival must turn him off, if this series had anything resembling logic.

Gothica's crush on Sonic is by far the most baseless relationship plot I've ever seen. As you said, she's only spent a few minutes in his presence, during which she was trying to kill him. How do you go from that to love?

Alright, just the obligatory "recap", and Sonic says that Shadow should just hand over Gothica. You know, why exactly does he need Gothica? Just let Becca exposit everything about her! Shadow says that Gothica doesn't want to see him, and then jumps to the conclusion that Sonic has a crush on her if he went to all the trouble of having Tails fly him somewhere, which he apparently does. Seriously, Sonic has even less of a reason to be included in this baseless romance! She was trying to kill you! And before anyone says something about him obsessing over her, it was because he didn't know what the fuck was happening!

Anyway, Gothica yells Sonic's name, which is fucking stupid because didn't she not want him to see her? Sonic follows her yell and Shadow says that it will be too late. Sonic has really terribly edited eyes as he yells for Gothica. Gothica is shown hanging from a crane, and then Becca exposits (to the audience, because we don't see Amy's reaction and Tails had left) that Gothica was cursed to look like Shadow, and only he could turn her back.

...

No. That does not happen. First of all, in the flashback in episode three, Gothica looked like Shadow, and he wasn't even made yet. Second, since Shadow is the only one who can turn her back, I'm going to naturally assume that's because he's the one who cursed her, but then, since when did he learn how to do that? Third, why would Shadow or whoever did that use such a stupid curse? If it's a curse, then shouldn't you have known a better one? It makes no sense, and to my knowledge, is never explained!

We cut to the ARK shooting something, I guess Gothica? Out to the Earth... for some reason. Seriously, all of the characters just do things without any reason of why they do them! I'm assuming Shadow was planning on doing this, but why? Gothica didn't do anything to you because you only shared twelve minutes of screentime together! Anyway, Gothica sinks and... becomes encased in a crystal...? I don't know, this abomination makes no sense whatsoever, it's like having tea and crumpets with Cthulhu, and that bastard still owes me twelve bucks.

Then, it's 200 Years Later, and Station Square is devastated because of the severe damage that SonicShadowX had done to humanity. Silver looks decent, but that's not saying much, he still looks bad. Oh, and you gotta love MS Paint Iblis. Silver shares my feelings by being dumbfounded at seeing Gothica in a crystal. Then the crystal explodes and sends blood everywhere, killing Gothica... if this series cared about what I wanted. Suddenly, a shiny Cosmo appears!

Ahh, QTDET, how I've missed your wonderful presence.

Who is this girl?

Well, since Gothica was in the crystal and the shiny Cosmo came out of it, I'm gonna assume that she's Gothica.

Could it be the same Gothica frozen 200 years ago?

See above.

Find out next imt on...

Nice. How do you make a typo like that? Oh, and as a little side-note, I am not able to do episode six because I just can't. No matter how many times I try to view it, it's just an error. Now, if anyone can live bloginate this or inform me that it is Lost Forever, that'd be great.

edited 31st Oct '10 8:58:45 PM by AwesomeZombie22

How long will it take my brain liquify itself to end it's suffering by watching this series?

If my brain does indeed liquify, can I hold the creator responsible?

I can't find it. It's lost forever.

Well, then, I guess I'll have to do the seventh part. Oh, and I went on shadowchick's youtube channel, and apparently, Mephiles is Gothica's father.

...

Gergeee!! What the- no, wreuggah! MEPHILES WANTS ALL OF TIME TO END! WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE PARTICIPATE IN MAKING GOTHICA!? Even if we're supposed to accept this, then HOW IS GOTHICA RELATED TO SHADOW OR BECCA?! If anything, Shadow would be her grandpa, since Mephiles' physical form was created from absorbing Shadow's... well, shadow, and Shadow was made with Black Doom's Blood, NOT FUCKING MEPHILES'!

Uggh.... this makes no sense... I think that my brain will cave in and suck in the rest of the world... thank God that this series is less than 20 episodes long, each one being a minute, but they somehow manage to give me more rage than a bad 2-hour long movie!

[[youtube: iwbRdQqKpYg]]

Now, since Episode Six is Lost Forever, I'm not sure if the change in style was in that one, but since I can't bloginate it, I will just assume that the change was in this episode. What change? You'll see.

Well, first the title card is still the same, and now she isn't using the large text boxes! Hurrah! ...but, there's a fecal lining to anything in here, so, it turns out that the text boxes are the same color that's on-screen, making them nearly impossible to read in most cases. So, yes. It has gotten even worse. My dad theorized that someone must have said "Those textboxes are way too fucking big." but instead of changing them, she does this. Making it hard to read. I know that the text is the same color of the character that's on-screen to indicate what they're saying, but if the character is on-screen, it's sort of already implied that they're talking when you put text over it! If we were say, in a clip with more than one character in it, or a character is talking off-screen, then a simple Character Name: Text. would have sufficed.

Urgh... it hasn't even started yet.

Mephiles, if you're supposedly haunting Gothica's dreams and you want to intimidate her to make her do your bidding, then why are you in your Shadow form? Go into that inky form, or something! Ya think she'd be terrified of a nude pallet swap of her cursed form? Though, maybe, saying that he's her father justifies it. Speaking of her cursed form, she's made it look a bit more detailed by giving her clothes to make her a little bit less like a recolor. Even though it's still obvious. Oh, and one of the comments of the sixth, someone asked, "Why does Gothica have glasses now?" and the author responded, and I am quoting, "I put them there B cause I wear glasses".

...

Wow.

Just.

Wow.

If she has the same personality as her "creator", assuming that she even is supposed to have a personality at all, then the "author" has made her point that Gothica is an Author Avatar.

Anyway, Gothica also seems to have a bell tied around her neck. Um... okay... also, the "creator" cannot spell continue. In fact, how about at the end of the series, I watch through all the episodes again to count how many words were misspelled! Why am I gonna do it again? Because I clearly have lost all senses, if you couldn't tell from the title!

I'm gonna count wrong punctuation too, like "don't be so shy?" that wasn't a question! It's reminding me of the Picnicface NFL Crunchtime video, you know, "Choose the words, choose the tone! 'You're a bitch?'". In fact, how fucking slippery must your hands be to touch the ? button instead of the ! button? They are at the opposite ends of the keyboard! She had to try to misspell that! Even if the typo was ? instead of ., with ? you have to hit the shift key, so it's still an unbelievable typo!

EDIT: Well, that was embarrassing. I seem to have hit the send button by accident.

Anywhoo, Sonic tries to say that he's not shy, and then boob-Kunckles basically says "GET ON WITH IT!" and Sonic does as commanded.

Then we cut to Maria in a flashback by Gothica. Just. Like. Mother. Fucking. Shadow. Ugh.... so, she finds out that if she sleeps, she can basically project herself to Shadow and he can't hurt her while she's a projection but she can hurt him. Um, how exactly did you find that out, what logical sense does it make that a projected avatar can physically harm something on a different plane, this also adds another power as if she weren't already a big enough Mary Sue, and OH HAI, EXPOSITION.

Now we find Black Rouge. Ya know? I don't think Knuckles or Rouge have been used yet, and they probably won't be in the future, so they've just been replaced with recolors. Yippie. You can't use existing characters, so you slap some colors on them and call them Bob, maybe even make them grow a vagina. Now, prepare yourself for a barrage of the worst creations MS Paint has ever spawned.

The first one is bad because it's the most simple thing you could possibly do with the program. Not to boast my huge cock at this tiny wiener, but I have made custom sprites on a program that's pretty much the same thing as MS Paint, and they look pretty good. That's not saying much, though. A turd covered in cockroaches is attractive when compared to this awful abomination that can barely be called a story. And now Gothica is wearing her old costume. Shadow, you are a huge-ass dick. You unfortunately know her? Seriously? What has she done to you in this story in the little screentime you share? Swear revenge on you for Maria's death? Yes, I know that it's stupid to blame you for something that you didn't want and didn't do, but you're the dick here! You turned her into a form that she didn't want to be in, sent her to the future, where she can never be with the guy that she was clearly interested in who had reciprocated the love, and you say that you're the one who has the bad luck to know her? There is no side to root for in this "conflict", because both are flat characters, though one's a Jerkass, and the other's a Mary Sue, so you have me rooting for the "villian"!

Also, Gothica's only reasoning for wanting revenge on Shadow are: 1. He's apparently responsible for Maria's death, which is BS. 2. He sent you to the future in a form that you hated, even though you are a shapeshifter and can also time-travel. Seriously, why are they fighting? Oh, yeah, because all the characters in here are dumber than sporks. Anyway, Gothica displays her use of CRYSTAL MAELSTROM! Nice use of a word, though I find it strange that you can spell "maelstrom", but not "go", maybe she just copy pasted from a thesaurus when she thought that "whirlpool" wasn't pretty enough for Gothica. Also, since when did she know how to do this? Did the exclusion of me seeing the sixth one really have that much exposition? Nah, this is Writing by the Seat of Your Pants, so it's most likely she just got New Powers as the Plot Demands. Also, bringing back Kathy again, she has stronger Chaos Powers than Shadow, but it's because Black Doom personally trained her and fed her Chaos Drives since she was an infant. Also, she's slower than him and her Super Mode is highly unstable and is incredibly painful for her, so she has things that stop her from being Shadow, but better! Which is strange that my character who is Shadow's successor is less of a Mary Sue than Gothica.

Anyway, the image of Crystal Maelstrom is mediocre. Not that bad for the series, but again, that's not saying much. Shadow has his Oh, Crap! moment, and then... the worst MS Paint creation ever. Really? You couldn't find a screenshot of Shadow falling so that you could draw crystals on him, so you make your own? The cuff on his shoe is larger than his hand. It pretty much speaks for itself on how terrible it is. I cannot grasp the true suck of this. Oh, and notice that he's falling backwards, but in the next shot, he's face-down. PHYSICS!!

Is Shadow still alive?

Since he's been lodged with a shit-ton of crystal shards, he'd be deader than disco if you didn't ask that, and if the next episode weren't titled "Shadow Lives?/Return To Crisis City".

edited 10th Dec '10 6:38:03 PM by AwesomeZombie22

... Wow. I honestly don't know which is worse: this, or Bludshot the Hedgehog.