Recap: Mystery Science Theater 3000 S 06 E 12 The Starfighters

The Sean Penn story!

"So basically, according to themselves, the Air Force is a bunch of leather-faced, not-so-bright, heavy-drinking, dull-witted speed freaks who poop in their pants and can't make it with women. Right? Am I right?"
Tom Servo

Film watched: The Starfighters

The Segments:

Prologue
  • Crow is trying to connect to the web, but keeps getting the same error. He then freaks out.

Segment 1
  • Crow still can't connect to the web, or to tech support. The Mads try to show their invention to Mike and the Bots, but they show off "Cowboy Mike's Ricochet (BANG) Barbecue Sauce", it's mighty bold!

Segment 2
  • Just as Crow and Servo reenact the refueling scenes from the movie, tech support finally connects. Crow tries to answer, but he's disconnected prematurely.

Segment 3
  • Servo and Crow, as generals, debrief Mike by debriefing him.

Segment 4
  • The United Servo Academy Men's Chorus, conducted by Vice Brigadier Thomas "Bullhead" Servo perform the United Servo Academy Men's Chorus Hymn.

Segment 5
  • Crow finally connects to the internet as Mike reads a letter from a group of people who put an effigy of Servo as their Christmas tree topper. The Mads are still neurally connected, while Frank thinks some nasty thoughts.


The MST3K presentation provides examples of:

  • Bawdy Song: The United Servo Academy Mens' Chorus begin an impromptu round of Mademoiselle from Armentières. For those who don't know the song, it's the tale of a French innkeeper's daughter and two German soldiers.
  • Big "NO!": Crow, when tech support hangs up on him.
  • Broken Aesop:
    Servo: So basically, according to themselves, the Air Force is a bunch of leather-faced, not-so-bright, heavy-drinking dull-witted speed freaks who poop in their pants and can't make it with women. Right? Am I right?
  • Continuity Nod: This film provided continuity nods for other MSTied movies, like humming the jazzy music whenever a plane is seen flying, mentions of the "poopie suit," and the use of the word "refueling" as a synonym for any long, dull scene.
  • Does This Remind You of Anything?: Crow and Servo re-enact the refueling scene in a rather disturbing fashion. Servo even gives a small "Whoa!" with an odd mixture of surprise and embarrassed pleasure. It gets a minor Call Back when Servo, looking at a picture of himself as the star atop a Christmas tree, remarks, "I bet that's a weird feeling."
  • Everything Is Online... except Crow.
  • Failed Attempt At Humor:
    Crow: I wanna kick this movie in the groin, and snag on it, and give it a power sit-up!
  • For Inconvenience, Press "1": Running gag as Crow tries to get his brand-new computer working. By Finagle's Law, he finally reaches an operator while he's busy with his beak stuck up Tom's hoverskirt (see Does This Remind You of Anything?, above).
  • invoked Hey, It's That Guy!: Robert Dornan.
    Crow: Bob Dornan? The Congressman?
    Servo: They couldn't get Rush Limbaugh?
  • Hilarious in Hindsightinvoked: The crew had used the term "poopie" for years, so it was a delightful coincidence Starfighters employed it as well.
  • Irony: John Witkowski Sr., who previously flew in bombers in the military, wants John Witkowski Jr. to switch to bombers rather than fighters such as the F-104 Starfighter. The latter was played by Bob Dornan, nicknamed "B-1," as in the bomber. The veteran Dornan flew fighters, too.
  • Large Ham: Mike and the 'bots pull out all the stops while advertising COWBOY MIKE'S OWN ORIGINAL RED HOT RIC-O-CHET (BANG!) BBQ SAUCE!! IT'S BOLD!!!
    Mike: C'mon, steak, you want some?!
    • Dr. Forrester is disappointed that....it's not all that bold.
      • NOW AVAILABLE IN NEW EXTRY BOLD!
  • Incredibly Lame Pun: Mike's de-briefing. Still funny though.
  • Lie Back and Think of England: One of the "refueling" riffs.
    Mike: "Just lie back and think of England's airspace."
  • Me's a Crowd
    • The United Servo Academy Mens' Chorus
  • Notable Original Music: United Servo Academy Mens' Chorus singing the United Servo Academy Mens' Chorus Hymn with Word Salad Lyrics that has lyrics taken from other songs.
  • Paddinginvoked
    Mike: I think there's more nothing in this film than any we've ever seen.
  • Rage Quit: Crow's Boogers partner logs off mid-game, implying this.
  • Running Gag: The ongoing Double Entendre concerning the numerous "refueling" sequences. At one point they even joke about the fact that they've done every joke they can think of about them. (And then Crow comes up with a new riff anyway.)
    • Riffs about how ugly many of the faces are.
    Mike: Is your face odd, misshapen? Join the Air Force!
    • Once, the "poopie suit" gets mentioned, Mike and Bots run with the gag. Bonus points for the theme song: "Flying high in the blue, free to do, number two, poop-oop-ee-doo!"
      • Bonus points for the fact that MST3K had been using "Poopie!" as an Unusual Euphemism before the film was riffed.
  • Sophisticated as Hell: When rescuing a pilot who screwed up and had to eject over the desert:
    Mike: Yes, we have a visual ID on Numbnuts...
    Crow: At ease, Lieutenant Loser!
  • Soundtrack Dissonance: "...bringing you hot munitions and cool jazz."
    • Also leading to a Crowning Moment of Funny as the pilots practice bombing the absolute shit out of the desert while muzak plays:
      Crow: We're gonna bomb 'em back to the Jazz Age!
  • Technology Marches On: invoked Rather inevitable with Crow boasting about his 90mhz Pentium PC, with 32 MB RAM, 4x CD-ROM, Soundblaster 16 sound card with a 28.8k baud modem.
    • And having to assign COM ports. MS-DOS sucked.
    Tom: "Looking for UART at Fx1050", what does that mean?
    Crow: I don't know! I must have configured my COM ports incorrectly!
    • Also a nice reminder of the days when we hadn't quite settled on what the Internet should be called given the massive array of protocols back then (HTTP not being as big as it is now) and a lot of people latched onto the clumsy term "information superhighway" coined by Al Gore. It's buzzwordy!
    • And when Crow finally does get online, his running commentary is said to indicate that he has logged onto Prodigy (the self-contained online service, not the ISP it later converted to).
    • However, Crow being invited to a game of Boogers (a four-player Ataxx clone) implied he was also on the ImagiNation Network, also a self-contained online service and not "the Internet", per se.
  • That Poor Cat:
    Mike: Don't laugh - they've got a kitten in that bomb. (he then mewls like a trapped cat)