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Quotes: Faux Affably Evil
My tables - meet it is set down
That one may smile and smile, and be a villain.

"I've adopted a strategy of pleasantness. It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. It seems a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale."
Edmund from Fool.

"Don't you know it's dangerous to walk alone at night? Someone like me might find you. Poor girl never saw it coming. Slash across her tummy — stomach contents everywhere! ♥"
Viral Renegade

"He sees the lighter side of everything!"

Redcloak: Our alliance with Xykon is one of the most important tools we have, and we cannot afford to screw that up. That does NOT mean we should trust him. I know he seems funny and charming, but believe me, when you've seen for yourself the depth to which he'll sink—
[Cut to]
Xykon [watching Tsukiko force re-animated corpses to fight American Gladiators-style for his amusement]: I love it, but can we get more silver spandex on those costumes?
Redcloak: — you will never sleep well again.

James: Charlotte's got Mithras stashed away somewhere safe now. He says Charnel's been summoning demons to aid Marduk.
Charnel: He lies! Do not believe anything he says!
James: ... What if he tells me you're a villain?
Charnel: ... Don't believe anything else he has to say!

"We want to kill you each in a unique and horrible way while the others look on. But first, let's get to know each other."
Shufgar, Schlock Mercenary

"Dear Jack: LOOK BEHIND YOU. Love, Aku. ♥"

"A man like him can be evil to the core, but if he is charismatic and amusing, people will listen to him. They'll even like him."

"Oh, hello Ilena. What's wrong? You seem to be missing an arm. Ah, here it is. You can have it back. You really shouldn't leave things lying around."

Handsome Jack: "Jimmy, please make a note: I'm strangling Mister Moorin for bringing up my wife."
Mister Blake: "Choked... Mister Moorin..."
Handsome Jack: "No, no, Jimmy, choking is something you do when you eat too fast. As I'm crushing Mister Moorin's windpipe with my watch chain, what I'm doing is actually referred to as strangling."

"Sure, she steals things that are pretty hard to steal, but then she gives you clues on how to find her, just because it's sportsmanlike."

"Oh, believe me, I am bad... I just like being polite about it! Ehe!"

Adrian Brody is some black ops soldier who is literally dropped into a new planet along with other soldiers and killers... They also have a failed plot twist with Topher Grace who plays a humble doctor who is so nice and hasn't killed anyone at all and if you haven't figured out the plot twist by now you haven't seen a movie ever.
Miles Antwiler on Predators

"What makes his character so great too is that he tries to hide his inner-raging-beast with his class and sophistication."

"I can say Deadpool, is sadistic, evil, but charming as hell."

"When I am finished with this minor interruption, we will resume our gentlemanly negotiation. I will proceed to beat you severely until you agree to do what I ask. I trust you won't take it personally."

Prometheus: What's The Joker like?
Lex Luthor: Frighteningly sick in the head, but strangely compelling company.
JLA #38

His beard and his brows were white, and the cast of his face was mild and wise, but his eyes were as hard as hailstones... Mabruk's semblance of affability vanished like a spark on snow, and with the same sound. His whole face became like his eyes.
— A description of the wizard Mabruk from The Last Unicorn.

(Shoots player) Forgive me. I don't believe we've met: I am Gehn... And you must be the one whom Atrus sent to trap me. I don't know where you got the brilliant idea to trap yourself in the book, but I must tell you that I am quite disappointed that it is you and not Atrus who must now pay the price for this foolishness. My one wish before I die would be to see him finally assume some responsibility for his actions. Perhaps it will happen one day... In the meantime, you have my sympathies.
Gehn, Riven

Jillian was finally coming to realize that Wanda was right about Dame Branch’s charm. Her kindness was an act, a weapon, a tool.

Aaron Altman: I know you care about him. I've never seen you like this about anyone, so please don't get me wrong when I tell you that Tom, while being a very nice guy, is the Devil.
Jane Craig: This isn't friendship. You're crazy, you know that?
Aaron Altman: What do you think the Devil is going to look like if he's around?
Jane Craig: God!
Aaron Altman: Come on! Nobody is going to be taken in by a guy with a long, red, pointy tail! What's he gonna sound like? [hisses]
Aaron Altman: No. I'm semi-serious here.
Jane Craig: You're seriously...
Aaron Altman: He will be attractive! He'll be nice and helpful. He'll get a job where he influences a great God-fearing nation. He'll never do an evil thing! He'll never deliberately hurt a living thing... he will just bit by little bit lower our standards where they are important. Just a tiny little bit. Just coax along flash over substance. Just a tiny little bit. And he'll talk about all of us really being salesmen. And he'll get all the great women.

Hi Christopher, I'm Nero.

Other stories tell how I eat innocent newborns, how I'm ten feet tall, how I breathe fire and have great dragon wings. None of those are wholly accurate. I don't have dragon wings, I don't breathe fire, I only eight feet tall and I've never eaten a newborn that didn't have it coming. My name is Mevolent. What's yours?

Dracula's smile was persuasive, but behind it were his teeth.

Plumm had an amiable look to him, especially when he smiled. The faithful retainer, every man's favorite nuncle, full of chuckles and old sayings and roughspun wisdom. It was all a sham. Those smiles never reached Plumm's eyes, where greed hid behind a veil of caution.
Tyrion Lannister's thoughts about the mercenary Brown Ben Pulmm, A Song of Ice and Fire.

Hoyt Volker: Lovely weather we're having.
Vaas Montenegro: Why boss, you planning a parade?
Hoyt: (laughs hard) That's why I love you Vaas, you make me laugh. Everything in business is so goddamn serious. But you. So... what about Snow White?
Vaas: You know, I don't give a fuck about him. I don't give a fuck.
Hoyt: Really? Then why am I here?
Vaas: Once you got the ransom money, his friends are gonna be sold like that. I shot his older brother. I did what you wanted with his younger brother. Except it's my sister... she's inking that white boy.
Hoyt: I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR FAMILY. It is by my grace that your head isn't impaled on the antenna of my car! Therefore, I would like it if you gave a fuck about Jason Brody!
Vaas: Okay, Hoyt. Okay, alright.
Hoyt: Fantastic! (beat) I am really loving this weather. What's the name of the village down the road? Beras Town? A bunch of native sympathizers. They stole a transportation manifest that's close to my heart. I'd like to pay them a visit. Nice to see you, Vaas.

While outwardly Tarn seemed charming, Bond got the impression that the charm was less than skin deep. Beneath the surface lay something malignant; an undertow of bleak, unbalanced evil mixed with the undeniable charisma.

"He's an absolutely awful human being. The strange thing about comedy is that if an awful character makes people laugh, people feel affectionate towards him. It's insane because if they had to sit next to him for five minutes at a dinner, they would absolutely not be able to cope with him. They would loathe him. But because he makes them laugh, they think, deep down, he's alright."

"The candidate sauntered to the lectern with the assurance of a sleepwalker — and immediately launched into a symphony of snorting and sneering remarks, taking time out in between the superior invective to present herself as just a humble gal with a beefcake husband and a brood of healthy, combat-ready spawn who just happened to be the innocent targets of a communist and probably also homosexual media conspiracy. She appeared to be completely without shame and utterly full of shit, awing a room full of hardened reporters with her sickly-sweet line about the high-school-flame-turned-hubby who, 'five children later,' is 'still my guy.' It was like watching Gidget address the Reichstag."
Matt Taibbi on the 2008 Republican National Convention

alternative title(s): Evilly Affable
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