Funny / SpongeBob SquarePants

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"You're using too much sauce."

Squidward: Patrick, what are you doing here?!
Patrick: Uhh... I don't know. (smiles wanly) I'm funny.

— "Suction Cup Symphony"

Being Nickelodeon's longest-running animated show ever, SpongeBob SquarePants has plenty of nautical hilarity to leave the viewers in stitches!

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Seasons

• Season 1
• Season 2
• Season 3
• Season 4
• Season 5
• Season 6
• Season 7
• Season 8
• Season 9
• Season 10
• Season 11
• Season 12
• Season 13

Movies

• The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
• Sponge Out of Water
• Sponge on the Run

Spinoffs

• The Patrick Star Show

Video Games

• Revenge of the Flying Dutchman
• Employee of the Month
• Battle for Bikini Bottom
• Lights, Camera, Pants!

Comics

• The Gilligan Cut in "Squidward and the Golden Clarinet", after SpongeBob tells Squidward that a clarinet saves Mermaid Man in one of his comics.
  Squidward: The little chum brain... now I am curious about his dopey comic book. But not enough to lose any sleep over it— heh, heh!
  [the next panel shows him awake in bed at night]
  Squidward: THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!
• In "Calls in the Wild", Squidward tries to play his clarinet in the wild but he has no extra reeds, so he just plays badly anyway. Suddenly SpongeBob and Patrick pounce on him, thinking he's a Mulligor; the clarinet sounded like his call. Then the real Mulligor shows up. He has SpongeBob, Patrick and Squidward in his clutches, and Squidward plays a clarinet note in self defence. Of course it comes out badly:
  Mulligor: Dude, that sounds terrible. You need a new reed.
  Squidward: I know.
  Mulligor: Here, let me see if I've got a spare in my pocket. [he pulls out a reed from his pocket] Man, you have to be careful with these fellas.
  Squidward: [bewildered] Uh... thanks?
• In "Yacht to Know", Squidward tries to get SpongeBob and Patrick to pretend to be his butler and chauffeur so they can be allowed on Squilliam's personal yacht. Of course, things start going very wrong, but Patrick announces to Squilliam that Squidward has one ship that he doesn't. Squilliam thinks he's going to say "friendship", but Patrick means a model ship in a bottle. Squidward's reaction in the background to Squilliam keeling over sells it.
• SpongeBob accidentally starting a brawl in the Krusty Krab in "Too Tough". While Squidward is sound asleep at the till in the background.
• From "The Treasure of Captain Goldfish":
  • Mr. Krabs suggests that his employees come along with him to go and find the treasure.
    Squidward: Us? I'm a cashier and he's a dunderhead. We don't know anything about sailing!
    Mr. Krabs: But ye work cheap, lad, and that beats experience in my book!
• The Orphaned Punchline in "Patty Pal"
  SpongeBob: And I said, "Couch, are you magical?! That quarter came out of nowhere!"
• In "Star of the Show", Squidward tries to bail on SpongeBob after he ruins (or saves) his one-squid-show too many times. As he exits the hotel room he trips over SpongeBob, who had been sleeping outside his door so he wouldn't oversleep the next day. Squidward claims that he's just going down to the lobby for some ice. As soon as he reaches the lobby, he trips over SpongeBob again, who had gotten his ice for him.
• SpongeBob accidentally whacking Squidward across the head with a Krabby Patty in a bag after trying to read the customer's mind in "Fry Cook 2.0".
• "Squishblarb?" (From "A New Label Maker")
• In "Hey, Squidward!", Squidward thinks that the photo SpongeBob took of a fish is blurry. But then it turns out that the fish he took a photo of was actually blurry in real life.
• "Not-So Great Expectations":
  • Squidward stays up all night reading Carol Darcy Mulette's latest book.
  Squidward: This doesn't make any sense... Is that... Could it be...?
  [next panel shows him asleep in his chair, drooling on his arm, his book splayed across his legs]
  Squidward: [one panel later, awake and finishing the book] What? That's it? She had a twin brother? Who's a vampire? From the future? And they all get hit by a TRAIN on the last page? I waited five years! Called off work! Stayed up all night! Bought the hardcover! For that?
  • The Blockville security guard crushing SpongeBob's camera underfoot. For some reason, he's prohibited from taking pictures despite the fact that the park isn't much to look at.
    SpongeBob: Sorry... I forgot.
  • The Blockville players at the Blockitorium's disappointment at the fact that SpongeBob and Squidward are the only two audience members.
    Actor #1: Only two people? I'm ''outta'' here!
    Actor #2: What are the rest of us supposed to do?
    Actor #1: Make believe I died!
    Actor #2: But you're the lead!
    SpongeBob: It's all so real!
  • At the end, SpongeBob tells Squidward that he had fun at that horrible theme park because he spent the day with his friend. Squidward is so touched by this that he can hardly speak, and bursts into tears. SpongeBob ends up Comically Missing the Point and thinking that Squidward didn't want to leave.
• From "Shake-O-Rama!"
  • While everyone in Bikini Bottom is feeling tremors and seeing destruction, Patrick is in a panic because... a chair fell over.
  • Plankton clutching onto Karen while she tries to calm him with a picture of bunnies.
  • Waitress Karen.
  • After SpongeBob accidentally lights Plankton's cart of dynamite, he tries to beat out the fire with Plankton.
  • The titular gimmick, which involves shaking the comic and blowing raspberries whenever Admiral Boffo appears. The best example of this is the final time this happens, in which Boffo goes crazy with all the shaking to the point where he accidentally destroys the comic he was shaking, and ends up shaking Scurvy the Rat instead!
    Admiral Boffo: RUMMA-RUMMA-RUMMA!
    Scurvy: HELP!
    • By the time the comic ends, Boffo has tapped the comic back together for Scurvy, who's still unhappy that Boffo wrecked his copy.
      Admiral Boffo: Yarrrr! Good as new, Scurvy!
      Scurvy: I WANT A MINT COPY!
• From "The Legend of Barnacle Bill, Part 2":
  Narrator: ... and all sidekick SpongeBob can do is call for help.
  SpongeBob: Help! Someone help! (He pops up out of the sand) Wait a minute! Maybe a "call" is just what I need to help Barnacle Bill!
  Narrator: Huh? Hold on... can SpongeBob hear what I'm saying?
  SpongeBob: I can't hear anything! Hahahaha!
  Narrator: (I'd better keep quiet.)
• The ending of "The Clarinet of Dr. Calamari": the whole thing is a story told by Patrick, to a guy who was only asking him what time it was. Squidward angrily comes over, wondering why Patrick is scaring away all the customers with some stupid story.
  Squidward: Look, I don't know what you're trying to pull here, but it's confusing the heck out of me!
  SpongeBob, Mr. Krabs and Sandy: [all dressed as characters from German Expressionist movies] You're telling us!
• In "The Liar!", Randy Albacore keeps getting SpongeBob's name wrong.
• In "Squidward's Mythological Madness", SpongeBob and Squidward are running from Patrick, who seems to have gotten a little into ancient mythology.
  Patrick: I'm gonna pull your brain out through your nose!
  SpongeBob: Heh— that doesn't sound so bad, Squidward! I mean, look at your nose! Your brain wouldn't even touch the sides!
• "Litter Box Blues" involves SpongeBob having to deal with a box of snail babies ("snailies"), which he names Petunia, Pedro, Pepper, Parsnip, Pamela...and David.
  • "Pedro, no! Sugar is not for snailies! What a mess!! Parsnip! Get down from there!! David, smaller slices of avocado for the salad, please."
  • And shortly after, it turns out one of the snailies was accidentally served in a Krabby Patty.
    SpongeBob: You said, "extra Pepper!"
• As it turns out in "The Curse of the S. S. Unpleasant", the eponymous ship hadn't taken SpongeBob to the ghost dimension. The Lighthouse Crew had put SpongeBob in a bag and stored him in the freezer air vent as a prank.
  • While most of the crew members have terrifying names, one of them is named Jeff.
• SpongeBob and Patrick reading a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure book. Patrick keeps choosing the opposite decisions to SpongeBob, making him a constant Doomed Contrarian.
• "Sandy's Adventures in the Land of Odd": The whole episode is a Whole-Plot Reference to Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (with a bit of The Wizard of Oz thrown in), with SpongeBob in the "White Rabbit" role. Of course, it's All Just a Dream.
  Sandy: So you ain't all fuzzy an' white?
  SpongeBob: Um, no...not lately.
• Author Signing Today: Squidward is having a book signing, with Patrick as a supposed "fan" of his, who doesn't like Squidward's books.
  Patrick: The REAL fantasy is he thinks I can read!
  Squidward: I suppose you can do BETTER?
  Patrick: Let's find out!
  • Patrick's no better, of course. The books he makes are about the level of quality you expect from Patrick, which include titles such as "Dark Lord of Some Things," ^note "He had some things... ...But where did he put them? (Maybe in the Volcano of Doom?)" "Words of Fantasy,"^note "Sword! Dragon! Princess! DOOM!" and the most hilarious of them all, "Xfrplb and the Cave of Crayons."
    Patrick: Writing is EASY. You just put letters together to make words.
    Squidward: XFRPLB is not a word!
    Patrick: It is now!
• In "Classics Ahoy!" we have a Moby Schtick chapter with SpongeBob in the Captain Ahab role and he looks hilarious.
  • Mr. Krabs as "Dracumoolah".
  SpongeBob: Stand back, Patrick! Only the foul stench of charity or an IOU note driven through the creature's heart can stop it now!

Other

• This is a pretty awesome treat: The voice actors of SpongeBob, Patrick, Sandy, and Squidward redubbing scenes from classic movies.
• While not really made by the creators of the show, the edited episodes that have cuss words replace parts of the original scripts tend to be fests of laughs for viewers.
  • Case in point: No Free Head. And "Milk-maid Man and Barnacle Balls III", by the same guy.
  • The Squidward Gets Possessed By A Bad Lemon video made by MoBrosStudios is 6 minutes and 16 seconds of humor in every part.
• The SpongeBob 4D ride is four-and-a-half minutes of hilarity. Some significant moments:
  • "Hey, is that my patty?"
  • SpongeBob reasoning that in order to catch Patrick, he must think like Patrick. As such:
    SpongeBob:^note It's worth mentioning that he is facing the wrong direction on the Bubble Bike as he does this. [goes cross-eyed while imitating Patrick] Duuuuh... [looks down] Look, toes! [bends down; cue the Bubble Bike going on a chaos-ensuing rampage through town]
  • "Hey, that looks just like the back of the Rock Bottom sign. ROCK BOTTOM?!"
  • "By the way, you're doing great for your first day."
  • "Pickle? Wasn't me! (cue Patbot) ...it's ME! AHHHHH! (runs away)"
  • When Plankton's showing off the Patbot 3000:
    Plankton: Behold! A hydraulic crusher to crush your bones! A titanium-tipped ripping saw to cut your flesh! AND A PADDLEBALL! ...Um, made from rubber and wood. [clears throat] And a staple. Anyways, get him!
  • Patrick is able to stop the wrath of the Patbot 3000 by... unplugging it so he can plug in a toaster.
  • The ending:
    Sandals: I'm allergic to pickles.
• Apparently taking a page from YouTube's book, Nickelodeon went ahead and did a literal version of the SpongeBob theme, where Painty the Pirate and the children sing what's literally shown in the opening (e.g., the children say "Here's the title" instead of singing "SpongeBob SquarePants" whenever the show's title is onscreen). So it's basically a parody of parodies. The only difference is that they own the rights.
• When the voice actors were doing a live table read of the pilot episode for fans at the "Shellebration" at Universal Studios, Doug Lawrence, in character as Plankton, interrupted midway.
• "I just wanna know your name!"
• Say it with us: "MY LEG!" "MY LEG!" can make just about anything funny. Want proof?
• In an interview with Tom Kenny, he explains how he got the voice for SpongeBob. The best part of it all though is when he curses, in-character as SpongeBob!
• Patchy the Pirate Bursting Through Houses for 10 Hours
  • Similarly, Patchy the Pirate Throwing Patties at Potty for 10 Hours.
    Potty: Rawk! Ya missed! Rawk! Is that all ya got? Rawk! Ya missed! Rawk! Is that all ya got? Rawk! Ya missed! Rawk! Is that all ya got? Rawk! Ya missed! Rawk! Is that all ya got? (etc.)
• At a convention, Tom Kenny was asked to do a bit where Spongebob meets the Ice King. Here is a storyboard made by a fan.
  Ice King: Hey, I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere. This isn't my ice castle.
• The Got Chocolate Milk? commercial from 2001. SpongeBob and Patrick decide to both have a glass of chocolate milk, but while Patrick gets a chocolate milk mustache, SpongeBob instead gains a chocolate milk mustache, beard, and eyebrows, only for his porousness to absorb them all within seconds. Tired of losing them, SpongeBob ups the ante by shoving his whole head into the glass... only to absorb the entire drink.

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