The gym teacher. He's the only teacher who could actually teach and was even considered for the position of science teacher, but he lost the position thanks to Miracle's "nude" presentation. Even though he's in love with Miracle, he hates her ditziness so much that he insults her instead of admitting his feelings for her.
- Alliterative Name: Larry Littlejunk
- Embarrassing Last Name: He refers to himself as "Larry L." due to his last name being "Littlejunk".
- Innocently Insensitive: He tends to insult Miracle without realizing it at times (though other times he's just fed up with her stupidity)
- Totally Radical In the episode "Tackin'" where he poses as a "cool new kid" that tries to convince the kids that being healthy is cool.
- Will They or Won't They?: He and Miracle are attracted to each other, but he can't stand her odd beliefs and attitudes which keeps their relationship from evolving.
- Like Father, Like Son: His dad also has a comfort kitty of his own and while works for the army, doesn't do any fighting.
- "Well Done, Son" Guy: Feels badly about not being in the military like his father.
- Voiced by: Kristin Chenoweth
The science teacher. Despite her position, she's a very spiritual hippie and is also really gullible. It's implied that she likes Larry, but doesn't like his distaste for her spirituality.
- Barefoot Loon: She always goes barefoot due to her eccentricity and New Agey beliefs.
- Big-Breast Pride: She's well-aware of the appeal of her large bust, and often flashes her breasts to get men to do what she wants.
- Buxom Beauty Standard: She's very well-endowed, which is partly why Larry is so attracted to her.
- The Ditz: She's a spiritualist hippie with very unorthodox beliefs, which often clash with Larry, or the science she's supposed to be teaching.
- Doting Parent: She's often seen toting her baby with her.
- Flexibility Equals Sex Ability: She attempts to seduce Larry by performing yoga poses around him in a way to flaunt her flexibility.
- Hippie Teacher: Despite her being a science teacher, she's into things like crystals.
- Ms. Fanservice: She's a very attractive girl, with a seductive personality and gets constant Male Gaze shots.
- Non-Standard Character Design: The only one to have colored irises.
- Punny Name: It's based on the fertilizer Miracle-Gro, and it's probably a reference to her large breasts.
- Puppy-Dog Eyes: She gives Larry a sad puppy-eye look to guilt him into saving animals at risk of drowning in a hurricane.
- The Tease: She often acts flirtatious, especially when she wants something.
The Assistant Principal. A Perpetual Smiler who is the most oblivious character in the show, moreso than even Miracle. Before becoming assistant principal, he worked as a "prison clown" (shown to be a clown in a black-and-white prison outfit). He starts the series appearing interested in Larry, but starts to develop feelings for Sue, with him spending an entire episode trying to impress her. It's also all but stated that he's completely insane.
- Ambiguously Bi: He's been hinted at being interested in Larry, Sue and Andrew.
The principal (technically, she's just the "acting principal" due to an accident involving the last principal). As principal, Sue's stern, firm, and to the point. Despite thinking that she's Closer to Earth, she's just as unqualified as most of the other staff: she's hypocritical, lazy, and doesn't really care for the well being of her staff.
- Crossdressing Voices: Voiced by Kenan Thompson.
- Meaningful Name: Her last name is pronounced "says no", and she indeed says no so much that it's her catchphrase.
- Not So Above It All: Has her moments of selfishness and corruption.
- Suspiciously Specific Denial: There is NOTHING going on in the auto shop garage.
The Arabic custodian. While he doesn't speak English in the first few episodes (being dubbed over by a translator), he does start to speak in very broken English later on. He lives in a shack on the school grounds.
- Overly Long Name: His real name.
The flamboyantly bisexual drama teacher.
- Meaningful Name: His surname is Spanish for "he likes both."
The librarian who often gets ignored or mistaken for inanimate objects. Despite her loneliness, she frequently talks and gossips with Andrew.
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Cargo Ship: Tends to date/fall in love with inanimate objects.
- Crazy Cat Lady: She's shown to be very lonely all the time and when we see the inside of her apartment in one episode, it's full of (live-action) cats.
- No Indoor Voice: Ironically for a librarian, she tends to yell a lot.
The German teacher. Despite being middle-aged, he's still heavily controlled by his mom. He starts off with a fear of driving and gets around by making emergency vehicles and hearses take him to his destination. He ends up obtaining the position of the school's driving instructor and uses the training car for his own personal transportation. Despite all of this, Ennis sees Willard as his closest friend and takes it upon himself to protect him from any perceived taunting.
- Extreme Doormat: He's prone to being a suck-up with all the teachers, to the point of sucking up to HITLER of all people.
- Out-of-Character Moment: He's generally a sweet guy, but in the episode "Back in Time" he hugs a Nazi.
- Unfortunate Names: His name is an obvious play on "douchebag."
- Vague Age: He was shown to be a teen in the 1920's
