The Great TV Tropes Western

(Kenny, meanwhile, takes off running toward one of Mike's companions. He runs extremely fast and knocks down the companion as he speeds by, also taking his gun. He then runs back to his original hiding spot.)

Now if I can just do that a few more times without gettin' hit... (He mutters, setting the pilfered gun aside.)

Not one to be outdone, the cat-eared man takes out his gun and fires a comically large bullet at Minigun Mike. He then starts running up and leaping across the rooftops to avoid Mike's Minigun, countering with a few shots of his own.

"Yeehaw!! Now this is what I'm talkin' about!"

Amelia crawls out of the saloon, staying low while continuing to use her parasol as a shield. Unfortunately, the giant bustle on her gown gives her away to another one of Mike's lackeys.

"Ah, sonnuva-" she growls as one of them fires at her. She rolls to the side, causing the bullet to go through the wall of the saloon, before firing several shots at him.

"Oh, you wanna play dirty, cowboy?" she smirks, crawling behind the saloon, "We'll play dirty."

Bluethorn tries throwing his lasso at one of the bandits.

From behind the counter in the saloon, Wild-Eye spots an opportunity: because a lot of the bandits are pre-occupied with terrorizing the cavalry, dealing with the frankly bizarre characters who are now shooting at them, and the bull, Mike himself is open to a surprise attack. Seeing an opportunity, Wild-Eye opens a saloon window behind Mike, aims for his left shoulder, and fires.

I leave it up to Puma whether or not the bullet hits.

The bull sent by the girl hits the bandit, tossing him several feet away.

Elio's bullet hits a bandit in the groin. Yeowch.

Amelia successfully hits that bandit from behind the wall.

Bluethorn's lasso successfully wraps around one bandit's torso.

Mike is hit with the cat-eared man's large bullet. He dodges the next few, but is so focused on the cat-eared man that he gets caught off-guard by Wild-Eye's bullet, which also hits.

Mike only flinches a little at both bullets. He seems more concerned about hiding the wounds with his arms than he does about the wounds themselves.

Mike flicks a tiny switch on his saddle. Some poles shoot up from the saddle, and a canopy unrolls and drapes down over Mike.

"I'm going to go patch up. Keep these fools busy!"

Mike rides his horse away. Several bandits form a wall between him and the townsfolk.

Puma is ducking behind a water barrel. He aims the gun Elio gave him at the wall of bandits.

Edited by DrNoPuma on May 9th 2020 at 12:56:00 PM

The cat-eared man watches from the rooftop as Minigun Mike runs away, and the other bandits descend on the other townsfolk.

"Nyehehe..." he chuckles. "This is my perfect opportuni- YIPE!"

His tail sticks straight out as he is nearly hit by a stray bullet. He tumbles off the roof and into a bush.

"Gotta be more careful," he sighs, before getting up and running in the direction of Minigun Mike.

Edited by Afterwards on May 9th 2020 at 9:27:52 AM

As Minigun Mike stops shooting, the cavalry starts to regroup, with most of the surviving members closing off the road on the other end (where they started, in fact), Sherry front and center.

New plan— we kill th'horses an' take in e'ry ban'it we can!

What about Mavis?! Isn't the minigunner ridin' back to where she is?!

She's 'sourceful, she cin han'le it! Fer now, we jus' cripple who we can!

The group collectively responds "YES MA'AM," and the cavalry members start shooting the bandit wall, aiming for the horses. A lot of their shots miss.

Meanwhile, Wild-Eye ducks back into the saloon, hoping that the bandits didn't notice him just yet.

They did not notice him yet.

Minigun Mike is still hidden in his canopy, but keeps his minigun pointed out through the flap.

Puma is shooting at the wall of bandits when he looks over and sees something terrible.

"My wagon!"

The wagon he bought earlier is being stripped of parts by some other bandits. Puma aims at them, though they've already taken away a lot of parts.

(Kenny notices the bandits attacking Puma's wagon.) I'll help take care of these fellers. (Kenny says. He prepares to bolt off again to incapacitate them.)

The girl looks over at the attackers of Puma's wagon and throws her pitchfork at one of the bandits "Hands off, bandido!"

"Hey! Hands off that wagon, you scoundrels!" shouts Bluethorn. He grabs a crowbar that's lying around and charges at the bandits.

Amelia dashes out from behind the saloon, wildly shooting at the bandits. "FUCK OUTTA HERE, DESPERADOS!"

(Making sure he doesn't get hit by Amelia's gunfire, Kenny rushes to the wagon at high speed and attempts to knock down some of the bandits as he runs by them before running back to the others.)

Dusty's head floats back to his body, which grabs onto his horns.

He uses his head to float his body to the top of the saloon.

   "Why haven't I tried that one before?"   

The body drops down to the roof, grabbing his head again.

   "Now, let's try somethin' a lil' bit different here."   

The body hurls the head at one of the bandits.

Elio lines up another shot with his borrowed rifle, with the assumption that he still has at least one bullet in there.

A new challenger approaches!

The multiple-times-aforementioned Mavis enters the fray from the same side Mike rode in on, with a small party of about 4 horsemen (IE, not nearly enough to take on a minigunner unless they're really good) accompanying her. With almost no warning, they all start shooting at the horses which Mike and his bandits are riding. None of them notice the cat-like stranger tailing Mike.

Meanwhile, on the townsfolk end, trouble has developed further. Sherry has run out of ammo, as have about half of the cavalry. On top of that, most of them have done buggerall to the wall of bandits. Two of them are shot and knocked off their horses by mooks in the wall, and one of the horses in the cavalry gets spooked and runs away, her rider still on her. The situation is looking even grimmer than it used to...

Inside the saloon, Wild-Eye takes a second to reload the two shot's he's used today, then hides under the window.

"Oh, fer cryin' out loud!" Mike shouts to the bandits. "These ladies and gents just ain't afraid of us like they should be! Come on, let's go to another town. We've almost got enough resources for the plan anyway."

The bandits reluctantly start to leave, though they're still shooting at the townsfolk.

I'm'll make sure these folks aren't gonna get hurt as they're movin' out! (Kenny says, dashing off to make sure the innocent townfolk aren't in danger of getting shot.)

"They're retreating!" says Bluethorn. "Should we follow them? Maybe if we do, we can find out where their hideout is..."

"I don't know..." says Puma. "They said they were going to another town next. But if we leave quickly, we can try."

Puma looks around, somewhat nervously, for the cat-eared man.

Edited by DrNoPuma on May 23rd 2020 at 10:52:15 AM

The girl whistles, calling the black bull back to her. She climbs on him "I don't know 'bout you fellers but I'm chasing those men down like a wolf to a lost calf" She turns to Puma "Wasn't you the one wantin' to catch 'um or have you gotten cold feet and became a chicken?"

"Of course I still want to catch him," says Puma. "I'm just a little unsure about what this means for that duel the cat-eared man challenged me to."

Wild-Eye exits the saloon and joins the burgeoning party, just as the bull girl accuses Puma of being a chicken.

Counterpoint: If we're going after Minigun Mike, we're going to need at least 12% of a solid battle plan. I don't think we can overwhelm him with sheer firepower, so that's off the table.

His plan rundown is interrupted however, by...

...Sherry bellowing PUMA LOOSETRIGGER! from across the street. She marches over to look him dead in the eye, and asks...

What'sat in yer hand?, referring to Elio's gun.

Meanwhile, Mavis and her gang of four briefly give chase to Mike and his crew, but one particularly-sharpshooting bandit quickly puts an end to that; all four of Mavis' horses collapse to the ground, as Mike and his ilk ride off into the wilderness. Frustrated, Mavis storms back to town.

Said cat-eared man suddenly drops down from a nearby roof, and is about to answer Puma, right when the Sheriff interrupts him.

"Oop..." he mutters, slowly backing away, hoping Sherry doesn't spot him. "Uh, we can duel some other time!"

With that, he turns tail and runs.