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  1. This is the Evil Overlord List, not the Good Overlord List. I will remember accordingly when deciding which rules I select to use.
  2. I will kill those who make stupid comments, unless they actually make sense for once.
  3. I will see about getting intelligent man-eating monsters to join my side, but they will be instructed to eat only my enemies, and not those peasant villagers. Those who refuse to listen to me, I will see to it that they are killed. Either way, the villagers will be grateful that I solved their monster problem, and will have no issues giving me tribute.
  4. Likewise, those bandit gangs that refuse to join me will also be killed, and the heads of the leaders and top men will be sent to the other gangs as a warning. After all, anything that interferes in my forces collecting tribute is a treat to my empire. That being said, by getting rid of those bandits, the villagers will have less issues paying.
  5. I shall never launch an attack on the Holidays. That's Bad Karma no matter what, especially when the Hero teams up with Santa, The Easter Bunny, The Great Pumpkin, The Leprechaun, the Tooth Fairy, The Giant Turkey, and those guys whose names no one can remember, but represent a holiday nonetheless.
  6. I shall never say "Nothing of this Earth can kill me!" Odds are, I'll have an encounter with someone from Heaven, Hell, Purgatory, Mars, Alternative Universe, or Fiction, who can, and does, have the ability to kill me, and they'd utterly vaporize me.
  7. I shall never kill someone while uttering "In the Name of the Lord!" or some variation thereof. Odds are, the Big Guy doesn't look too kindly upon those who kill in His names, and sees to it that they are rewarded as they deserve, with a lightning bolt, thus sending the person to Hell, where they find themselves in a really Hellish situation.
  8. I will inform my troops that tanks are made for long range combat, not close quarters combat. That's what APCs are for.
  9. I will train my troops to use hand gestures, facial expressions and body movement to communicate instead of shouting halfway across the battlefield.
  10. Never cross the moral event horizen, it will end with your death.
  11. I shall hire a professional doctor to teach my troops the layout of the human/alien bodies. That way, they know where to hit.
  12. My doomsday weapon will be a simple nuke. Preferably the Tasr bomb.
  13. Any troops who take drugs, show up drunk on duty or drink during their duty will get a kick to the jaw.
  14. If I find out that a cop has teamed up with a minor criminal, or a By-the-Book Cop has been partnered with a Cowboy Cop, I shall have them killed immediately, for it always seems that those guys, whose personalities seem to clash, each pick up different clues, and end up piecing them together, which leads to my downfall. Worse yet, they become best friends, and sometimes, something more.
  15. If I am an Immortal Evil Overlord who has flung his foolish foe into the future, where my evil is law, I shall be smart enough to figure out when and where he'll pop out at so that I can have him killed the very moment he comes to the Present. I don't ever want to see him again, even in time.
  16. If my foe carries that one weapon that can kill me, I shall keep an eye on him at all times. I don't want to find out that he had lost it fifty years ago, when I last personally saw him, only to find out two episodes too late that he had already regained it.
  17. If I have captured the Hero, and have taken away that one weapon that can kill me, I will not have his soon-to-be execution televised. That only brings out all of the friends he had made over the past fifty years, to try to rescue him. Granted the pathetic fools won't be able to harm me, much, but it might distract me at that critical moment, allowing the Hero to escape, reform my previously-brainwashed daughter, get his weapon back, and get back to that moment just after I flung him into the future and - What? Are you back already? No, Wait!
  18. Whether it is a bullet, an arrow, a crossbow, or a laser-based weapon, I will not waste my one remaining shot on a petty vendetta. Save that shot for my opposite number, when I have a clear undisturbed shot at him alone.
  19. If need be, I shall cite the sources that I use for my examples - rules 1315-1317, for instance, come from Samurai Jack, and describe just how Aku was defeated.
  20. I shall also inform those who want to have a discussion to use the Discussion Page, not the List Page. Those who fail to follow this will be fired, out of a cannon! Into a wall of spikes! For there is no such thing as Overkill!
  21. I will have a large and robust spy network to feed me information. Information that is useless to me but useful to others will be sold at a high price.
  22. Instead of running around corners or running through the battlefield like a headless chicken, I will teach my troops to peek around corners and remind them to observe their surroundings. Any troops who can’t learn these simple tricks will get a kick to the jaw.
  23. Alternatively, instead of kicking those failures in the jaw, I might have them be given an "Important Assignment", and have them forcefully parachuted into my enemy's countryside, scattering them all over, and thus distract his forces long enough for me to launch my real attack, while my enemy's troops are scattered chasing those failures of mine. I might even be nice to those that survive this, and let them become farmers, or something that won't interfere with my plans too much.
  24. If I can shapeshift (or is trying to gain the ability to do so), I will exploit social justice to my advantage by turning onto a selected minority (like a black, jewish woman).
  25. My private/escape plane will be the SR-71 Blackbird. Good luck catching me!
  26. Actually I will tell my R&D team to reverse engineer the Blackbird to make different and more powerful versions of it. The heroes won’t expect a naplam bomb from 70000 feet from the sky.
  27. If my elite troops and commanders are being slain by the heroes through dumb luck, their own incompetence or through “smart” tactics that are predictable, I should start hiring or training better troops. I should also start to hire the best mercenaries in the world.
  28. I will train my troops not to show any mercy or emotions, any troops who show emotions or mercy will be “offered” the glorious position of suicide bomber. As well as a kick to the jaw!
  29. On the other hand, if my troops have a valid reason for showing mercy, such as the fact that the person is the only one who knows The Cure to that illness that's been ravaging my forces, or if their lifeforce is connected to a bomb that will blow up my country if the person dies, or something else of vital importance, I shall not punish them, and might give them a nice reward, like a house on the beach in Miami, or some such thing.
  30. If my enemy decides to sync up a bomb that will blow up my country to his lifeforce, if he is a Hero, I shall call him out for it, and with any luck, he will deactivate the bomb out of shame. If he is an eviler villain, I shall contact the Hero and let them know that this eviler villain is holding my people, some of whom are innocent, hostage, and he will deactivate the bomb for me, at which point I will blow the head off of the eviler villain. As for the Hero, it will depend on if I'm feeling generous.
  31. If the forces of me and one of my enemies has just had to work together against a common foe, I shall compare the strength of our respective forces to see if it's worth it to conquer my enemy's lands. If taking them over is worth it, I shall do so. If taking them over would weaken me too much, I shall go back home to rebuild.
  32. If my forces and those of the Hero are forced to work together, I shall instruct my forces not to attack those of the Hero, despite any personal enmity they might have with someone on the Hero's side. After all, their body might absorb an arrow, or bullet, or otherwise take a blow that might have been meant for them, and likewise, their own bullets and arrows and blows might be the one that downs a particularly dangerous enemy. That being said, accidents do occur on the battlefield.
  33. If a Coattail Riding Relative shows up, and tries to mooch money off of me, tries to get positions for them and their friends within my organization, and demands obedience from my troops, I shall drop them into my enemy's base, and then send an encoded message that I know the Hero will pick up, stating that said relative is "My Greatest And Deadliest Agent". With any luck, they will kill them for me. That being said, if my relative manages to turn the tables on the Hero, and manages to kill them instead, or otherwise evict them, I might give my relative some money, and authority, and point out that they are now in charge of my new secondary base.
  34. I will remind my troops not to charge at the hero hiding behind cover. Grenades exist for a reason.
  35. There is no such thing as the power of friendship and love. Teamwork and rage on the other hand......
  36. I will not promote my relatives into positions that they are not capable of doing. They will have to earn it like everyone else, and I'll expect more out of them before I even think about promoting them, let alone give it to them.
  37. If I encounter a group or village, and it turns out that the leader is a spineless coward, who surrendered to me in two seconds after I showed up, I will see about finding someone who won't betray me, yet wouldn't be the sort to surrender as quick as the other person did, to be in charge. Dirty cowards switch sides more often than the average person changes their underwear.
  38. If the leader of the group I encounter seems to be eccentric, stuck in their own fantasy land where they claim to be a king, and call their fighters knights, but seem capable of leading them effectively, and have kept their people safe, I shall assume at least one of the following is true - they are putting on an act to fool me, he is a decoy and that the person serving the wine is the real leader, or that they have really good advisers who do the real leading.
  39. If the leader of the group has a clear disability, such as missing a hand, or their legs, yet they give orders to those who are more physically able, I shall assume that they did something to earn the other peoples' respect, and might be capable of giving me a run for my money.
  40. If I happen to wear a costume for my villainous acts, and I encounter someone wearing the same costume, I shall politely ask them why they are wearing the outfit. If it is for one of those crazy conventions, and everyone is dressed up like me, I shall get a blinged-out, yet functional, version of my costume, as my normal costume might be somewhat shabby compared to the convention goers' outfits, and see about having some fun. Who knows, I might end up winning the "Best Me Impersonator" Contest, and get a nice little check for having the best outfit, and all the other prizes. Who knows, I might end up friending a few on Social Media, or I might just kill everyone there, or I might use the crowd to my advantage, have my minions dress up as me, and have them commit a series of crimes while the convention is ongoing, and since everyone is dressed alike, it might delay the cops, and even trick the Hero himself.
  41. Likewise, if I find out that the person dressed like me is some wanna-be, I'll see about tricking the Hero into going after them, and while the Hero might not kill them, especially once they realize that the person is just a poser, they'll give them a stern lecture about dressing up as me.
  42. Of course, if the impostor is looking to kill me, I'll kill them.
  43. If the impostor wants to work for me, and they've got all the right looks, and pass the background check, I might use them as a body double.
  44. I will not spend the whole day sitting on my throne (or something similar) and doing nothing. I will spend time in the war room disscusing strategy with my generals, I will train with my troops to increase combat effectiveness and I will spend time in the library reading books. I will also check up on my R&D team.
  45. Always have a backup general or head of department.
  46. My doom mooks will be feared because of their skill, not because of how they look.
  47. I will make sure that my commanders do not stand at the battlefield doing nothing, they are called commanders for a reason.
  48. I will give a speech to my troops that friendship, love, luck or any other bullshit does not win wars. Skill, tactics, advanced weaponry, overpowered spells or anything that involves blowing off the head of the heroes will win wars.
  49. I will take steps to make sure I never fall to villain decay.
  50. My "piggy bank" will be protected behind a wall of mobile auto turrets as well as a group of juggernauts equipped with grenades and miniguns.
  51. If I am a one-man army, who has no issues killing people left and right, but I have a bodyguard, who is also a one-man army, and their method of protecting me is to simply knock out the enemy so that we can sneak away from a potential secondary enemy, I shall listen to them. It is one thing to tangle with a group of rival criminals, or even the police, but not both at the same time.
  52. Speaking of police, I shall be polite to every officer I meet, especially if said officer is not in my back pocket. This includes their Sci Fi and Fantasy counterparts, along with any other sort of lawman, especially if I am not on their radar just yet.
  53. If my foe has a name like Deathbringer, or The Destroyer, or some other such "Awesome McCool" Name, I'll deal with them myself, poke them in the eyes, and the battle will be over. If their name is something like Bob, or Tim, or some other dull and boring name, I shall call upon all of my forces, and those of all of my allies, as well as those who are also enemies of my enemy, and make sure that all of them are wearing red shirts, and brown pants, same with myself, for those will be needed.
  54. If I am performing political maneuvers, I will try to make them simple as possible.
  55. If I am a monster, I shall put on the appearance of a Friendly Neighborhood Monster, and I won't even hide the fact that I am a monster. I'll just appear to be the sort of person who likes to play sports, enjoy parties, and the like, while feeding upon people from outside of the area. That way, when those Monster Slayers show up, I can portray them as Racist Assholes, or the equivalent, make their deaths look like self-defense, and my neighbors will help me to get rid of my would-be killers, because neighbors stick together.
  56. If I am a being to whom death is just a minor annoyance, like taxes, I shall see to it that, while it won't be easy to kill me, it won't be too difficult for the average person to do so. Granted, the whole getting shot in the head, or getting a stake through the heart, might get boring after a while, I don't want someone to grab a nuke in order to burn my house down, for that would be terrible for the property values if the place becomes irradiated.
  57. Alternatively, if death is an annoyance for me, I shall host a contest for people to come up with an entertaining way to kill me. Grand Prize winner gets the honor of killing me, while most of the others get a nice sum of cash or a vacation trip to someplace exotic, or another nice prize, with the majority getting a ribbon that said "I Participated in the Kill The Evil Monster Contest". As for those whose plans are just plain too stupid, or are way too dangerous, they get the booby prize, and end up as my lunch, especially those whose plans would cause the deaths of more than just me and/or themselves!
  58. My base will be placed in a easy to defend location, not how scary the place looks.
  59. Alternatively, instead of engaging in a physical, or even a mental, battle with my foe, I shall simply sue their pants off, especially if I have a valid case against them for hate crimes, assault, vandalism, attempted murder, and everything else. After a while, they won't have any money to pay for a defense, and they'll have to sell their gear, which I'll secretly buy, they won't be able to pay their forces, who will get secretly hired by me, they'll have to sell their home, which I'll buy, along with everything else, just to pay the court fees. That being said, I'll make sure that I have plenty of money to wage this legal battle.
  60. If the hero or heroine flips the script on me to get out of the Sadistic Choice I'm trying to trap them into, I will point out that I'm judging them by their standards, not mine. After all the self-righteous preaching they do, they can't afford to be hypocrites ,so they have to practice what they preach and make their choice. I'm obviously exempt because I play by my own rules, not theirs, so that means I could care less about what happens when they fail, and I don't suffer any losses, not even a moral one. There's no way I will lose after this.
  61. If I absolutely have to possess something the Hero has for some sort of Ritual of Ultimate Power, such as fresh blood of your enemy; I will ensure that the Hero has no way of fighting back. They will be straightjacketed, have inhibitors installed in their body to negate their powers, and I will have them isolated in my dungeon under armed guard, who will beat them senseless if they try to escape. If all I need is their blood however, not fresh or anything, then a mere blood sample will suffice, and I will terminate the specimen with extreme prejudice.
  62. If my enemy has recently held the weapon that me, or my minions, use to commit crimes with, and I plan to use that weapon on them, I shall double-check to make sure that they didn't take out the bullets, turn the safety on, swap out that blue pellet filled with a hate serum for a plain old blueberry, or anything else that would render the weapon useless.
  63. See that person healing the heroes, they die first.
  64. Instead of using one type of air/sea vehicle for battles, I will tell my R&D team to develop a wide range of vehicles for different situations, such as using a stealth plane instead of an attack fighter jet for reconnaissance.
  65. I shall create a How To Page for people to learn how to do things here, that way they can make pages in regards to their favorite movies, books, game, and other things that are not currently listed on TV Tropes. However, unknown to them, clicking on said page will awaken an electronic worm that will bypass their security system, get into their bank accounts, and slowly siphon money towards my account. Likewise, this worm shall also send itself to those the person sends an email to, and siphon money from them as well.
  66. If a "How To Page" has already been made, I shall make a worm that will do as described above, and embed it in the page.
  67. If I find myself on the Discworld, I shall avoid Mrs. Cake at all costs. Vampires, werewolves, dwarves, trolls, zombies, gods, demons, Death, Commander Samuel Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch, and other powerful beings and entities are nothing compared to her.
  68. If my enemy's abilities and weaknesses are known and publicly televised (especially in a sporting event), I will ensure that I am informed about them. Even if I cannot watch them, I will have the minions that are close by document said abilities and weaknesses, retain that information and bring them to me and my Legions of Doom. This way, we can strategize, protecting ourselves from the heroes' strengths and developing countermeasures, instead of twiddling our thumbs and getting our asses kicked because we didn't use our information to protect ourselves, or worse - accidentally empowering the heroes to their strengths and our weaknesses in the middle of a fight.
  69. When doing stealth missions, instead of using loud vehicles such as motorcycles or even worse, cars, my troops will use an ancient vehicle known as a bicycle.
  70. It is greatly recommended that I do DNA and blood tests on all my forces on a regular basis (like say everytime someone returns to base or something.) That way, I can pick up any one of the heroes that try to slip through the cracks, so to speak. Same goes for medical checkups and diseases.
  71. Screw it, I will just copy and paste everything the current worldwide(america, russia, india, singapore etc.) military has, from their tactics, vehicles, special units and everything else. I will make significant improvements as well.
  72. My "mooks" will actually be Ex-special forces from around the world, let's see the heroes fight against Ex Navy seals and SAS, equipped with the most overpowered equipment my R&D team can make. Truth be told, all I really need is a single B2 stealth bomber.
  73. I will remind my citizens that drone strikes, tanks and attack helicopters will be a normal thing in my empire.
  74. If the Hero has managed to befriend a very powerful creature, I shall be extra careful.
  75. I shall read the Hero's Vows Lists, so that I can learn from them. I shall then insert false information in it.
  76. If I have a minion that has the ability of illusion, the plan is going south, my forces are surrounded by the heroes, and yet my high-value target is within my grasp, I will have said minion create a diversion, and have my men take the time to snatch said target as we make our escape, instead of leaving empty handed.
  77. Should I be cornered or defeated by the Heroes, I will activate protocol doomsday, which is to launch every single nuclear missile I have and tell my troops to make their last stand and die in a blaze of glory. If my troops survive, they will live off the grid.
  78. I will make sure my bullets fly at the speed of sound and cause internal bleeding.
  79. I shall assume that the Hero has read this, and inserted false information into the lists. That being said, I shall see about fixing it.
  80. I will make sure my engineers actually know how to do their job, this is to prevent planes from exploding when it gets punched.
  81. My troops must learn basic physics, anyone who can't learn basic physics will be sent back to school.
  82. I will be good friends with the most powerful nations in the world.
  83. I will obey the international rules for war, it is not evil but at least I won't be a war criminal and receive no aid from other countries.
  84. I shall also help out the less fortunate nations. Good press is not to be underrated.
  85. I will do as the Romans once did, and learn from my foes. If their weapons and tactics, and other things, are superior to my own, I shall adopt the ones that fit my needs and abilities.
  86. If I have an Adviser, or a High Priest, whose job is to translate whatever I say for the common person, even when me and them already speak the same language and dialect, I will explain to them that while they may add some flourishes to what I say, they are not to mistranslate what I say. If they do so, I'll have them killed, right then and there.
  87. If a spell or a ritual requires human blood, I shall see just how much is required. If freshness doesn't matter, I shall simply go to the blood bank and pick up a few pouches. If only a few drops are required, I shall simply prick my own finger. If a sacrifice of life is required, I shall look for a willing volunteer.
  88. If a spell or ritual requires a live sacrifice, I shall simply put out an advertisement, or thirty, stating that I am looking for someone willing to sacrifice their life for the cause, that they must be of sound mind, if not body, and that their family would be well compensated, with money, college education to the place of their choosing, plus a few other boons. I doubt there will be a shortage of volunteers, especially of those with stage 4 cancer, or some other such incurable and fatal conditions.
  89. If a volunteer for a sacrifice decides to back out at the last moment, I shall respect this decision, and see to it that they are given a small token payment.
  90. If that adviser, or high priest, decides to "mistranslate" my order to let the volunteer return to their home as "Kill him for treason", I shall ask the adviser/high priest if they are willing to die for me. If they say yes, I'll kill them, thus completing the requirements needed for the sacrifice. I shall then offer their old job to the volunteer, who is free to decline the offer.
  91. If the adviser, or high priest, says no, to the question of if they were willing to die for me, I'll kill them anyways, and offer their old job to the volunteer, and then locate another volunteer for the sacrifice. Of course, if the old volunteer turns down the offer of being my new adviser/high priest, I shall respect this choice. That being said, if they do take the offer, at least they know first-hand the penalty for mistranslating my orders.
  92. Between battles, I will have each of my specialized legions of terror cross-train. A basic knowledge of each other's battle styles is never useless. The same premise will be applied to my caper crewmen.
  93. Despite my vow not to permit lying around boozing during times of peace, my Legions of Terror will learn basic cooking skills. It might actually encourage better or more creative use of that leftover mead and roast boar.
  94. I will live in a realm where the laws of physic, chemistry, biology and others work. The heroes won't expect to be killed by a bullet's impact force.
  95. Before assaulting the rebel's base, it would be wise to send a strike team first instead of sending my entire army first.
  96. Instead of having a self destruct button, I will simply install a fail-safe system, which only I can use.
  97. Randomly killing people or destroying random villages is of course a bad thing. Unfortunately most evil overlords don't get this.
  98. Instead of using flamethrowers, my troops will use a simple shotgun. As well as a backup pistol.
  99. I will follow every rule of the workplace safety and health program. It is not evil but it makes my workers happy and finding new workers takes time and resources. Plus it will usually confuse the heroes.
  100. In addition, it will increase work effectively by a million and more people will be willing to work for me.

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